Great Things Take Time @arjaysteez - Tumblr Blog

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Throwing in the towel

I came into this career because I could not stand the push back and the more I waited the longer I strayed away from my goal of being a nurse. It sucks that money was involved and my position is to restart all over again.

Sleep technician

sounded so good on paper when my friend told me about it. The money, time, and freedom that it came with all sounded great. It was too good to be true. The position, schooling, and job was already aimed for. Took them months to schedule me a trainer (mind you I requested early April and didnt get scheduled 2nd week of July) With the trainer I was paired with I could not comprehend her teaching style and pick up on her picky habits. It led me to be frustrated every single day. When things went wrong, it was not a 1 on 1 conversation. Others working the shift heard the mistakes I would make and along with how rude my trainer was talking to me. She made me feel dumb to the point I was losing interest and would hate myself for driving back the next day. I really enjoyed the job and actually picked up on how to scoring/ stages of sleep and arousals. I just could not stand my trainer. I joined at bad time while I had to learn Dr.Chrono I also had to learn AdvanceMD.

Last thursday, I felt I was on a roll I had everything done on a timely manner. My trainer on the other hand was on her phone and eating taco bell all night. She'd check up on me and I'd tell her the things i've done so far. When it was almost time to go she decides to check on my scoring/staging and gets upset when she catches a small mistake that I missed which was one DeSat (OSA). Something she could have caught if she were to check my work earlier in the night. Now we were left staying almost an hour over and she's complaining that she is tired when the whole night all she did was eat and be on her phone. Telling me why are my calculations wrong and that these are people lives if I were to make a mistake. First, my calc. was right til you caught the one DeSat i missed which turned everything wrong because now the AHI is different. Second, dont be angry if you ask me if I remember the patients SpO2 minimum because regardless of my answer of guessing or IDK you were already on my ass about it.

Aside from actually learning how to score and do notes, I looked into the financial part of this job. It was not fit for my lifestyle to live paycheck to paycheck if i were to commute for a minimum wage job. Being a certified tech is already lowest of the low but putting the time and effort into becoming a registered tech still put you in a low bracket. Reaching six figs would require me to work 5+ yrs not to mention other perks to even reach that amount. I seen the bigger picture through a giant magnifying glass. Just to find out that there are more to it. You would think money is good til you realize what you need to put yourself into. They make you read the charts to make sure the patient isnt going into some cardiac arrest but pay you minimum isnt right... they say the job is high in demand but pay is low. Wouldn't you want High pay if in demand??

Anyway, I wasnt fit for the job nor did I felt i belonged. So I made the decision to leave and go for IT.

I hope you’re doing well too 😇

Doing okay. Hope you’re doing better.

I’m so sorry :( I really was a mess then

Only take your apology in boba, I’ll take a Thai Tea with mini boba. Ty Ty!

Was going through my rear dash cam footage and it catches me about to cry and in disbelief on the day my baby boy passed. Still not over it.

First the car, now you?

Finding out you past this morning hurt. My baby boy you were everything to me. You helped me learn to understand that you weren’t just no regular pup but a child of mine. I laid in bed reminiscing at all the adventures we had and all the trips to the beach. I didn’t want to believe it till I stepped out in the backyard. I’m glad I still took you in after knowing your sister I wanted was taken. I’m glad I got to experience a child like doggo. No more huskies for me as you will always be my one and only baby boy.

I love you Kino. You’ve been a good boy all these years. Rest In Peace buddy.

When todays sushi plans don’t go through you make new ones on the spot. Sushi dinner in the city then treasure island goin home (btw fucken ate shit goin down the rocks and had to take a break because the pain from before came back)

Iss my Friday.

Got out of work and literally went straight to SF. Not gonna lie that hour nap in the parking lot hit different. Waking up and hearing waves is very soothing. Need to bring my long board next time.

Unexpected trips like these be the best.

…And fuck you to the seagull that shat on my windshield.

*making my usual late night snack: Bagels*

*grandma watching netflix*

Nanay: Apo (grandson) have kids already.

Me: (talking to myself) Trust me nanay I WANT KIDS too but I aint got no one.

Movin

Earlier this morning I was in the living room chillin. Grandma had her phone on speaker and in the phone call was my uncle Jay and mom. First, I heard the conversation of how much the tickets cost to go to the Philippines. Then my mom mentions bringing my (half) sister back here to the U.S. My relationship with my sister is just as stale as a fuckin hot cheeto chip that sat in the car floor for so long. She’s done my mom dirty way too many times and has been living free off my parents money.

So imagine that same incident except here. She has no job experience like at all. Last I want is for me to suffer because she’s going to be home most of the time... or not I could be wrong. Aint nothing free here. You gonna finally get to experience that money dont come from trees.

My mom offered to take over payments of the house and made me realize that she said that so my sister can live here.

Welp, soon enough I’ll have to look for an apartment or somewhere to rent either lathrop or tracy because I am not sharing the same roof with her.

A Valentines Day to remember

First and foremost, I just want to say thank you... Thank you for being the absolute best car I have owned. Many will never understand these type of things especially when you have sentimental value over it.

Today, was my last time had my last ride with her. Everything didnt hit me till now. Just like what everyone says “you dont miss em till theyre gone”. I got this car at the age 21 with not the best credit at the time. But with the help of my brother I got the car of my dreams. We had some ups and downs but I learned from them. Can you believe this august would have been a decade owning this car? yah me neither. Throughout the 9 years I learned a lot about this car and it got to the point that if something was wrong I knew what broke and how to replace it. I am thankful for everything that this car has done for me. Took me from A to B, met new friends along the way, made fond memories and constant smiles. I’ve would’ve never realized what struggling was till the time this car blew up on me and had to improvise how to get to work and save money.

The moment I walked out of the collision shop and had a last glimpse of the car it felt like as if I left a peace of myself behind and the further we got down the street my heart sunk more and more. I loved this car so much that I wanted to keep it till my kids were old enough to drive it. But that dream will never happen. All I can do is reminisce through old photos and remember the good times.

again... thank you for being the best.

RIP Subi 2/14/2022

Tahoe + no sleep

Never…AGAIN!!! Per usual my ass does not sleep when it comes to upcoming trips. My brain and body is just too excited. For two days, yes TWO DAYS! I have not slept. It’s been 48hrs and my bonk ass had to volunteer to drive. On the way there everything was fine. No one was asleep, talking about random stuff and old memories. We arrive to Tahoe at 8:30ish AM (mind you we left 6am) the resort doesn’t open till 9. I had a debate with myself if I should nap for a bit but shots of henny and tequila were flying left and right. What do I do? Not pussy out and take them shots..Duh! While that happened I was stretching. Stretched so much my body thought it was time to go sleep but NOPE slopes opened early and we went. Most of the time I stuck around with those who were learning so they wouldn’t get lost. While the others went on I stayed. Like a mother and her ducklings. Fast forward towards end of day, the other half of the group met up with us but they were donezo. Before the trip I asked one of my friends if it’s cool they drive my car home. He said yes, and I was happy since I could catch some sleep. But that plan changed and he was drunk. I ended up driving while everyone else was sleeping. Let me tell you, I started hallucinating while driving. The taillights of cars became like little anime characters fighting. I shook my head just to make sure I was not trippin. But i was indeed feeling it. Glad I got everyone home safe and sound. But yah never again am I doing that. Gonna take melatonin next time.

Des: why are u swiping left on pretty women

Me: I just want a Viet or Filipino baddie, okay?

Story of my life

*Sigh*

I usually don’t share work related things especially in my profession. But this week has been tough. I thought I caught Covid and I’ve been isolating myself for the past week waiting for my results (thank God i didnt after 2 tests).

Just got to SoCal yesterday and I’m out and about with my family in Huntington beach and my coworker was constantly calling me. Even though my phones reception was great the call kept stuttering. Wasn’t too sure of whats going on but I texted her that I will call first thing in the morning since I'm out with family.

At 8am and I get the worst news “Hi, Arnie I just wanted to let you know Clara passed away yesterday afternoon”.

Boy let me tell you, my heart dropped... started crying and couldnt keep my composure. I literally had a conversation with her yesterday morning before I left and told her that I’d be back Monday to tell her all about my trip. I always look forward to seeing my patients especially Clara. She always had back to back stories of her travels and endless pictures of the places shes visited. It was a never a dull moment with her and I’m glad I was able to spend some time before she left.

Rest easy Clara!

Just when you move into the new year unexplainable things happen. I cut her off beginning of last year.

Here’s a little back story with this girl:

She hurt my cousin and lied to him. I gave her advice and she threw it out the window and played him. If you got somebody let ‘em know. Don’t sugarcoat and play the “he’s just a friend” game knowing damn well it’s more than that. She constantly made mistakes that it reflected on me of a certain person. So I made the move of unfriending her on my social medias to get away from faint memories.

And now here we are 9 months later in another shit show. I don’t understand why she’d text me. Josh still likes her and she’s grown closer to my family that I told my best cousin Des that I will never show up to another family function at her place because I know my aunt will invite her. Sorry not sorry.

And with Josh I told his bonk ass to drop her but the fucktard can’t seem to let her go 🤦🏻‍♂️.

What a bittersweet moment

Ended 2021 with an unexpected turn of events and starting 2022 with a bigger heart. It’s not necessarily a good bye imo but a see ya later.

I usually post more stories in my IG that I had to put sensitive stuff into my snapchat since my mom follows me on ig. Since the day she called quits I non-stop thought about her. Knowing I cant do anything about it but let her be. (week later) Just now I go on Snapchat and what was once “Orangesodashawty” in my friends list became “Kim”. From then on, I knew I was unfriended. My heart dropped, mind soared, and body stuck. Then I thought “yknow what, lets not make this an emotional trip and send her a simple goodbye text”. I sent this goodbye text because knowing my damn self she would be still running in the back of my mind. I did it to tell myself to move on so my heart knows to part ways. There was so much erasing of words that I did not want to put too much.

I don’t know when I’ll come across another person like her but I’m blessed to be given that short period of time.

BACK TO MY PHONE BEING SUPER DRY OKKUURRRT

My conversations with my siblings aren’t as comparable to the ones I have with my close friends. My older brother and I text each other once in a blue moon. When we do it’s usually something about hobbies or something car related. Growing up I did what every little brother did and follow their kuya (big brother). Usually people have someone or something to spike their interest in certain hobbies or activity. My brother was that guy. I got into cars at a very young age because of him. He showed me initial D and what cars were in there. He took me to car shows then to late night races at the ages of 11-12. Named every part in dads tool box so whenever he named a specific tool I knew which one.

7 year ago I attempted my first transmission removal because I couldn’t afford to pay someone. It took about a week but I got the job done. Fast forward to spring of this year, kuya buys a WRX wagon that needed a transmission fix. It took me only 3hrs to remove the transmission but 2-3 days to get the car running. Kuya was shocked but was very proud of how fast it took to get it done because he’s never done it before.

Where I’m trying to get at with this is when dad left kuya was there. He has been a father figure to my little brother and I growing up. He did what every father should do and I’m thankful for him. I don’t know what a father’s acknowledgment is like but this hit deep.

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