#extradirty
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Cosimo Galluzzi
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JBB: An Artblog!
Claire Keane
Sade Olutola
NASA
Kiana Khansmith
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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One Nice Bug Per Day
will byers stan first human second
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Keni
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@asertivamorena
[text -> Apes]: deep thought of the day by Leo [text -> Apes] If you work at a sex shop then every post is safe for work.
[text: Elwood Blues] ………..[text: Elwood Blues] you might have to explain that one to me[text: Elwood Blues] where are you even findin these sex jokes. i didnt think ya knew how to use technology cept for basic textin
[text->Apes]: yet more deep thoughts [text-.Apes]: Porn is just like driving songs, you don’t find the perfect one until you’re pretty much already there
[text: Elwood Blues] i spent a solid 10 min tryna think of a response to this and i ain’t got shit on that...[text: Elwood Blues] you win this time, leo. only this time
[text-> O'Neil]: funny [text-. O'Neil]: your joke was like the time I told a chemistry joke to Mikey, there was no reaction. (duzmachines 95)
[text: Rhamnetin] wow don, that was sodium funny, i slapped my neon that one[text: Rhamnetin] what did the angry electron say when it was repelled?[text: Rhamnetin] let me atom!
[text -> from duzmachines 95]: my contribution because the other puns are lame [text -. from duzmachines 95]: Two atoms are walking along. One of them says:“Oh, no, I think I lost an electron.”“Are you sure?”“Yes, I’m positive.”
[text: Rhamnetin] i know you ain’t dissin my puns, einstein. you got a lotta nerve thinkin you can out-pun me with science shit[text: Rhamnetin] if iron man and silver surfer teamed up, they’d be alloys
current contacts in april’s phone
[text -> Apes]: another deep thought [text -> Apes]: Those who are applying to optometry school for the upcoming year will be the Class of “2020”
that wasn’t even a good one. yet april couldn’t help but giggle a bit at it. it took her a moment or two until she thought of a response, her fingers tapping away.[text: Elwood Blues] i ‘see’ what you did there, but did you know[text: Elwood Blues] a man’s wife once gave him her glass eye b/c she knows he’s always lookin for free ‘wifi’[text: Elwood Blues] hahaha get it yet?
[text -> Apes]: deep thought of the day by Leo, [text -> Apes]: When toilets were first invented, people were probably like “You’re gonna do that IN THE HOUSE?!”
she had to read the message over twice before formulating a reply. classic leo to always send her messages that have no actual deep meaning to anything. instead of a proper response like ‘ooo that’s so informative’, april decided to send toilet jokes instead.[text: Elwood Blues] it’s all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.[text: Elwood Blues] my friend made a band with some of his buddies. they’re called ‘rage against the latrine’
@leonardoxleads
"’m god, leo... yes...” a rather wide grin crossed her features as the woman lifted her hips, smiling down at the mutant between her legs. when he shifted and pushed gently at her thigh to keep her down, it caused a shudder to course through her body, her head tilting back slightly. the sensual touch to her bare legs was causing a sensory overload at the moment. her fingers dug into the couch cushion as she attempted to keep herself calm. and then his fingers wrapped around one ankle to keep her still. to keep her from messing up his current administrations. “fuck... leo... h-holy shit...” her eyes widened with clear anticipation, teeth sinking against the bottom of her lip. the giant mutant said nothing in response, though the clever smirk on his face was evident. and just as it had began, it was all over, giving april no time for an initial reaction. leo glanced over at her, looking quite pleased with himself. the woman leaned forward as the mutant released her ankle. dark hues inspected the paint job he had applied to her toenails; vibrant colours with intricate designs adorning them. “damn leo. when didja learn ta give such an awesome pedicure? i ought ta make you do my nails all the time from now on.” she leaned in even more for a better look. “who woulda thunk ya could do this shit.”
@leonardoxleads
"yo leo... guess what i’m wearin’... it’s the smile ya gave me.”
@leonardoxleads
”no... no no no.... please... please... you stupid piece of--” she couldn’t do it... no matter how hard she tried... april’s trembling and blood stained fingers moved to gingerly touch her face. the blood there was drying quickly, accompanied with pain to her eye and cheek. there was pain elsewhere in her body, but it was ignored. they’d already wasted too much time, and the enemies were starting to flood in with no signs of ceasing. with a curse and in a fit of rage, the woman flung the device to the ground, watching it shatter into pieces. it was damn useless! although the duo had only been in this new dimension for a few days, she was frustrated that she didn’t understand the technology yet. you’re not donatello. you’re not as smart as him. dark hues fluttered up, watching leo as he swatted away a couple of enemies with relative ease. still, it was evident that he was becoming exhausted with having to fight so many creatures. if donatello were here, he’d have already found a way back... april swore again, turning just in time to find an enemy instantly upon her. managing to perform a clumsy dodge, she rolled to the side, groping her belt for her masakari. she felt the butt of the enemy’s weapon connect with her chest. a pained grunt escaped her as her body was shoved back, the woman stumbling and falling to the ground. her weapon came up to block another attack, giving her only a short amount of time to regain her breath. turning her head to the side, her eyes sought out the mutant. if they both wanted to live, they’d have to figure out an escape plan. “leo! we need to get the hell outta here. NOW!”
@leonardoxleads
april was quick to copy the link before opening up the previous text from her friend. she pasted it into the message, sending it off while humming to herself. [text: Elwood Blues] this is how you ask the nerd out, Leo http://imgur.com/RkxMa9s [text: Elwood Blues] i would’ve given you some tech babble flirtation, but you prob would’ve gotten tongue tied [text: Elwood Blues] that’s your best bet anyway. if you’re lucky, he’ll... well, you have shit luck sooo...
[text}: Deep thought of the day, by Leo. [text:] Someone should create a beer company called “Responsibly” so that every other company will advertise them when they state “please drink responsibly”
dark hues slipped to the side as she considered the text. she had to admit, his ‘deep thought’ was definitely on the smarter side of marketing. april looked back to her phone, a small smile gracing her lips.[text: Elwood Blues] funny.[text: Elwood Blues] the company wouldn’t need to personally advertise. pretty smart, Leo. did Don tell you that?[text: Elwood Blues] actually, that sounds more like a Mikey idea.
The turtle blinked a couple of times, snapping out from his rage. He did understand what the other said… He somehow remembered the words.. Yet it wasn’t what he said but how he said it.. And who he was. Wanted it or not this more civilized turtle has become the object of his affections.
He looked around, noticed the woman hiding between him and the bush and growled slowly. He doesn’t like her, not at all.
Then he looked back at him, the blood and all… He huffed and smacked both his palms on his thighs then he turned away and began to run back to the forest. He’ll try again later.
He quickly got lost into bushes, flowers and trees. He headed to the nearest area of the riverbank to wash his wounds, recover perhaps finding something to eat then he’d go back later.
april didn’t dare to glare back at the feral when they made eye contact. it was bad enough that donatello had gotten hurt in the process of saving her. she watched the feral as it looked to her friend, before he turned and ran away, disappearing amidst the reddish orange bushes. as soon as it disappeared, april let out a noise of disapproval, crawling out from under the bush and turning to the more civilized mutant. “jesus, don. he could’ve torn your arm right off.” she leaned in to inspect the wound when he removed his hand. donatello, in turn, replied with how it would’ve been impossible before slipping into a ramble. april rolled her eyes as she left him for only a moment to grab their bags. she dragged them over, then pilfered through them to find the first aid kit while donatello still talked. “i knew we should’ve brought wyck and asclepius. wyck would’ve been able to beat the livin’ crap outta that thing. and we know asclepius is a much better medic than i am.” april set herself to cleaning and wrapping up the injury. “we need to get the hell outta here. forget the artifact; with that thing runnin’ around, who knows when it’ll attack next.”
The pain was enough strong to make him notice something else besides the turtle that was (for now) the center of his attention. He growled and huffed, twitched in pain and then his predatory eyes sought with ferocity the source of the pain.
An intense animalistic gaze directed to her, the woman that hurt him. He grunted and rubbed the side of his head, on the area where the pain irradiated.
Then he got up and ran toward her as fast as he could, ready to attack. He launched at her visibly angry. At this point, he would just get rid of whoever or whatever interrupts him or distracts him from his main goal.
Amped up with hormones and rage, he was aiming to kill…
once she had garnered the turtle’s attention, that was when april realized that he, like donnie, was a mutant. a feral, and extremely predatory looking. dark hues widened when he shot a deadly glare at her. she took a step back, then another, glancing side to side to find a bigger piece of anything for a weapon. just as she spotted a large branch, he had left donnie and charged towards her. april dove for the branch, just in time. she twisted and swung it out towards the turtle, whacking him in the face with it. that did little to deter him, but enough for her to slide back more. if she didn’t do something quick, she knew he was going to kill her. she was no match for him at all. april scrambled across the ground, grabbing anything and everything she could get her hands on to chuck it towards the terrapin. once she ran out of things to throw, fear coursed through her, causing her to shrink back against a bush. the turtle loomed over her, a deadly gleam in his wild eyes. “d-donnie!”
It didn’t took long for the turtle to recover, he landed on his side but it was like nothing to him..An entire life in the woods and fighting for survive had made him develop an impressive strength.
He growled, irritation was evident. It didn’t hurt but he wasn’t up for tolerating rejections. He wouldn’t understand the nature of the rejection itself, he was following his own impulses. He launched after the turtle again.
Landing in front of him, he quickly grasped him by the legs and pulled him toward himself and once more he was straddling him. He tried again to entice him, his hands moved down the other’s neck and up his jaw, rubbing his palms on his cheeks then he patted him a couple of times.. .Next he sniffed him, taking a good whiff on his scent as he perceived something.. Yes something that indicated he could keep going.
Grunting with need, his hands moved down the other’s neck to his sides, more of that.. That stuff, the fabric, covering the turtle in places he needed to see. He tugged and yanked from the band of the turtle’s pants until the buttons gave up and the fly attempted to rip off, then he quickly slid a hand under the fabric, searching for the other mutant’s tail.
no no no no… scrambling along the dirt like a wounded animal, one hand finally landed upon the glasses which had been tossed aside earlier. he snatched them greedily, hugging them close, just as the feral turtle snatched his legs. donatello let out a strained yelp, being dragged towards the other. it was evident by the way the other moved his hands about donatello, that he was trying to calm him and pursued him at the same time. the pats to his cheeks had the genius wincing slightly, more so because he couldn’t see those hands. another sniff; evidently the feral mutant liked what he smelled, because whatever don was emitting, it made the turtle continue his actions. down his neck those hands went, skimming over his shoulders, and down to his sides. there was tugging at his pants, before don felt the buttons snap off; then an intruding hand dipping beneath his pants, eagerly groping for his tail. donatello did his best to keep the other from finding it, but failed. and as soon as those rough fingers curled around it, the feral turtle earned a reluctant moan from don. hands moved out blindly, gripping around the other turtle’s biceps, nails digging against the skin. “a-april…” he mumbled, before trying to speak louder. with the grip on his tail sending weakening shudders through his body, the genius did what he could to make his voice louder, praying april could hear his cries.
the shrine was beautiful. both from the outside, and the dusty, creaky inside. april had moved about it slowly, trying to respect the ancient place. the flashlight shone into the darkest areas, illuminating them for her to see better. there were no signs of the ancient artifact they were seeking, but she still took her time in exploring. there was some faint rustling from outside, though she only assumed it was a breeze from the forest. deeper and deeper she went, until she could’ve sworn she heard her name. april stopped, turning and flashing the light towards where she came from. there was her name again! it sounded like... donatello?! dread enveloped her before the woman flew through the shrine towards the exit. as soon as she threw the doors open, she spotted donatello up a little ways on the ground with a creature atop him, attacking him. “DONNIE!” april skipped over the steps and dashed across the yard, flipping the flashlight in her hand. “HEY! GET OFF MY FRIEND, YOU ASSHOLE!” once she was upon them, she was too pissed to realize that it was another mutant turtle that had donatello pinned to the ground. with a ferocious yell, april brought the butt of the flashlight down across the head of the feral mutant, then raised her arm and whacked him again. “I SAID. GET. THE. FUCK. OFF.” with no regard to her own safety, considering this was a feral creature, april reached out and slammed her palm against the turtle’s shoulder before trying to pull him off of the other turtle beneath him.
noah could barely keep up with the pretty lady’s order but he managed to, and he was very proud of himself for it to, “you must be pretty thirsty,” he giggled softly. handing all her cups over to his colleague. “that’ll be 47 pounds and 25 cents please, april,” he smiled at her kindly, expensive order.
the displeasure at the bill was evident on her features, before the woman pinched the bridge of her nose. she should’ve just gotten them all pizza. it would’ve been a lot less cheaper probably. whatever, it was too late now. “mwisho wakati i kutumia fedha juu yao...” she grumbled, fishing out her wallet. april pulled out several twenties, handing them over with a strained smile. “yes well, i suppose this order will keep me quite hydrated for the next couple of weeks.”
❛ ❛ – – I will FINISH what you S T A R T E D. ❜ ❜
