“I like the way you kiss me,” you whisper and freeze, engulfed by silence as his brown eyes search yours. He is looking at you like this is a dream that’s going to end at any second, like the words you just said are a product of his imagination.
Your hands slowly travel up his arms, caressing them midway and going higher, shoulders and neck. He shudders a little.
“Love…” he doesn’t finish, because he has no idea how. Do you mean it? Do you want me to kiss you? Until there’s no air left in our lungs?
But when you cup his face in your hands, what he says is “I like the way you kiss me, too.”
And then, something snaps between you two. You let out a quiet whimper just as Newt pulls you close to him. He covers your lips with his like you belong to him, like you’re the treasure, and he’s a pirate that spent his whole life looking for you. His hands squeeze your waist, while yours find their way to his hair, tugging at it. He lets out a growl.
It’s not the usual, we’re dating kiss. It’s two people savoring each other’s presence while the whole world around them is in ruins, and if it were to blow up this very second, they wouldn’t care.
Newt experiments. Up until a few months ago, he’s never even seen a girl before, and now he finds himself in love, and navigating the unknown like a sailor does an ocean. Up until a few seconds ago, he didn’t know that softly biting your lip would make you gasp, and now his tongue is exploring your mouth. And he knows that he’s doing it right when he hears those tiny sounds that you let out.
Newt doesn’t think. His body acts on its own, hands traveling to your thighs and squeezing gently. You moan his name quietly.
That’s when he loses it completely. While his lips leave wet kisses along the side of your neck, sucking and biting, his mind is chanting your name – Y/n, Y/n, Y/n. You’re the girl that has glamoured him, stolen his heart, and, to be honest, he doesn’t want it back. Ever.
Catching him off guard, you grab his shoulders and turn the two of you around, pressing him into the wall. Feeling his strong chest and massaging his broad shoulders, you find his lips again, and it’s anything but innocent. At this moment, you’re not just kids in love, but lovers.
And then, you lose it, too. While Newt is lost in passion, you slide your arms under his hoodie and feel him for the first time. The way his abdomen tenses and his breathing hitches gives you shivers – and makes you a little proud. You’re doing this to him. You’re the girl that drives him crazy.
Your hands go up and down, and you feel the goosebumps cover his skin. Newt’s kisses become sloppier, until they stop altogether with a restrained moan. Oh, God, you could get drunk on these sounds.
Newt, however, isn’t as amused. Suddenly, he feels all too vulnerable, too exposed. He tries to keep his composure, holding onto you for dear life. He’s drowning. God, he’s drowning.
As he feels the tension in his stomach grow, his heartbeat rises. No, he can’t ruin this moment, not now, not with the girl of his dreams. But his body decides to ignore his thoughts completely, as he feels his pants become a little too tight. And, what a coincidence, you move a little too close.
And he feels you, and you feel him, and it all stops. Like a party with loud music that suddenly turns off and everybody looks around to find that one sucker who screwed up the fun. But here, in Newt’s small room, he is that sucker, and he has officially fucked up.
He looks at you wild-eyed, scrambling for words and miserably failing. “It’s not.. I didn’t… I can’t control that… I’m sor-” The rest of the phrase collapses in the kiss you give him.
After a few moments, you pull away. Both of you are breathing heavily. Newt looks at you with surprise and hope – maybe, he hasn’t ruined anything.
You fumble with the edge of his hoodie. “Do you think we could… try? You know,” you feel a little shy saying that.
Newt lets out a breath. “Try,” he echoes, “Try what? You mean..?” You can’t possibly mean that, can you?
You sigh and say it bluntly, throwing caution to the wind. “Do you want to have sex with me?”
He chokes. “What?” he asks, even though he’s heard you perfectly. He just never really thought that his nighttime fantasies might actually become reality one day – today.
He might have actually said it out loud, because you smile, and by the look on your face he knows that you know what effect you have on him.
Your smile grows bigger as he smiles, too. Your foreheads touch, and with eyes closed, he breathes, “God, I love you. Are you even real?”
He smiles. With a soft grunt, Newt picks you up and carries you to bed, you giggling all along. He lays you down gently, kicks off his shoes and climbs on top of you. He’s so close he can kiss you right now, but there is hesitation in his eyes.
You know you have to reassure him somehow. “Show me how much you love me,” you tell him, and he doesn’t need to hear anything else. His lips smash on yours in an instant. You’re his, and he’s yours, and for now it’s all that matters. In between open mouthed kisses, he groans. “I’m gonna show you exactly how much I love you.” Kiss. “How much you mean to me.” Kiss. “How much…” Kiss. “… I want you.”
With that, he lets himself fall on top of you completely. They way his chest is pressed against yours, your hips rubbing against his is maddening. You moan simultaneously.
You don’t know how it happened, but just in a few moments you’re both shirtless, and Newt’s fingers hook up your trousers and start dragging them down – along with your panties.
Oh my God, you think, and suddenly it’s not so fun anymore.
You feel tension rise in your chest. All insecurities suddenly scream, loudly, in your head. Not beautiful enough. Not the perfect body. And there’s nowhere to hide.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asks, and you know he will if you ask.
You shake your head hesitantly.
Newt sits on the edge of the bed, leaning in to ask, his voice gentle as ever, “What’s wrong?”
You cover your face, already feeling embarrassed. “It’s just… I just… argh,” you huff out a breath. “I’m just a little nervous,” you finally admit.
“Nervous?” he chuckles as he intertwines his fingers with yours. “Love, I wouldn’t believe that for a second after what you’ve just said.”
“Right now. On this bed,” he imitates, and you blush furiously.
“Yeah, well, I can want you and still be nervous about it,” you try to defend yourself, but you’re only half serious. “I am multifunctional.”
You both laugh a little, but then Newt’s smile drops. “No, seriously, are you okay with this? We don’t have to go on if not.”
He rubs small circles on the back of your hand, a small touch that makes such a huge impact on you.
“Look, it’s just…” You hesitate, but when his eyes beg you to go on, you finally say, “I’m a little… insecure.”
The look he gives you is incredulous, like this is the most ridiculous thing he has ever heard.
His lips smash on yours with such force you let out a surprised whimper. The kiss is big, and he hovers over you like a shield.
“What in the bloody hell would you feel insecure about,” He huffs between sloppy kisses. There’s barely enough air, and he uses it to say everything that’s running through his mind right now. “You’re perfect, you’re-”
“Newt,” you interrupt, but he looks you dead in the eye so you don’t go on.
He speaks slowly, so that you really listen, “You are human. And there’s nothing more beautiful than that. And I love you for it.” He looks half angry when he says it, like the sheer thought of you feeling this way about yourself makes him mad, because this isn’t fair. Then, his eyes soften. “And if I have to remind you of this every single day, I will.”
You start tearing up at his words. He’s just lifted a huge stone of your chest. You sit up and close the distance and show him just how grateful you are with the kiss. He moans, enjoying the feeling.
You break apart, foreheads still kissing though, lips stretched in wide smiles. Newt brushes your arms up and down while you wipe the fallen tears away.
“You want me to undress first?” Newt murmurs.
“Yes, please.” Despite what he told you a few moments ago, you can’t help but relax a little.
“You want to undress me?” he suggests with a mischievous grin.
“Mm-hmm,” you hum happily.
You shift, so that now he’s the one laying on the bed and you’re the one straddling him. Playfulness is quick to come to you, so you take your time to feel his abs first. The growl he lets out makes you very pleased.
The air is growing hotter again, and you feel yourself becoming more impatient. In a few quick motions, you unzip his pants and drag them down. Newt realizes only when you come back up to remove his boxers.
Feeling his cheeks redden, he lets you do it. He has to show you there is nothing to be scared of – even if he is a little self-conscious himself.
With a final move, his boxers are down. You try to not get weird about it, but seeing a dick for the first time up close is a little unusual.
But then the thought kicks in, “It’s huge.” And then, “It’s gonna be inside of me.” And then, “How is it gonna fit inside of me?”
But you express all of it in one simple word, “Wow.”
Newt can’t decide which is worse – you staring down at him and not having him yet, or you staring down at him and not having him yet.
But before he finds the answer, you throw another unexpected question at him. “Can I touch you?”
“I’m afraid if you don’t, I’m not gonna make it out alive,” he says, and actually makes you laugh.
“I’m serious,” but he knows you know he is not. He will stop at any moment if you just say the word.
“Okay, I’m serious, too,” and with that, your hand wraps around his cock. You move up and down experimentally.
How the hell do I do this? You think to yourself. You want to make him feel good just as hard as you want him to make your legs tremble.
He makes a sound, then covers your hand with his, guiding your movements.
After a few seconds he manages a small nod, and it’s actually difficult, because, sodding hell, the girl of his dreams is touching him.
A couple of minutes pass as you stroke him gently, you other hand rubbing his stomach, thighs, but in the end just holding his hand, because he needs to hold on to something.
Then he feels himself grow dangerously close to unraveling, and he stops you, “Wait, wait.”
He sits up, grabbing your hips a little to strongly, because his self control is long gone. With a big kiss, he tells you, “You’ll make me lose it if you continue like that.”
A smug grin makes its way to your face. “Tell me how lost you already are.”
Newt lets out a shuddering breath. “Like it’s my first day running the Maze.”
“Good.” The word is short, but the kiss that follows is oh-so-long. And wet.
This time, you let Newt ease you out of your clothes completely. The way he trails kisses all over your chest and stomach, the way his hands are all over you, and the sounds he lets out makes you forget about whatever fear you’ve felt before.
Now is Newt’s turn to stare at you, and it starts to get a little complicated for him. He has absolutely no idea how to please you – and the realization makes him panic a little.
But he wants to make you feel good. Better than good. So he asks you, “Can you… show me?”
Your mind goes blank for a moment.
Show you how I touch myself.
The thought makes you a little embarrassed, but at the same time hot. So you just… go for it. “Okay?” But it’s more of a question. You’re not sure how to process that.
Your fingers trail down to your folds, and all the while Newt stares. You close your eyes, hoping it’ll make it easier. Rubbing small circles around your clit, you deliberately spread the wetness all over it, trying to get the idea to him.
“Okay, I got it,” he suddenly says, and crawls behind you, making you press your back against his front.
You didn’t expect it, though. By the time your mind catches up with the moment, his hands already spread your legs wide open and goddamn it did your fantasy become real.
His fingers find their way to your glistening clit. The feeling is foreign, but the unfamiliar movements make it even more pleasant. Your breathing gets heavier, more rapid.
“Feels good?” Newt whispers in your ear. His hot breath gives you goosebumps.
“Mm-hmm,” you hum, because you can’t really say anything else.
You get lost in the feeling, heat coiling in your stomach as his fingers rub gentle circles into you. But then, he gets close to you entrance, and you arch your back involuntarily.
“Tell me what to do,” Newt says, because he isn’t quite sure.
You take his hand and push one finger inside of you. Half a knuckle, then more, and more. And then he gets it, and pushes the finger inside of you fully. The groan you let out is surprisingly loud.
Secretly happy that he makes you feel this good, Newt continues pumping his finger in and out of you. He trails kisses down your neck, his other hand massaging your breast.
Goddammit are you gonna make him lose it.
He carefully adds another finger, so as not to hurt you. Feeling yourself stretch around him, you realize you’re getting closer and closer to your climax.
You take his hand to stop him and turn around for a kiss. He answers hungrily and shifts his weight so he’s on top of you. The arousal you both feel is dangerous, because right now nothing in this world exists but you two, the feeling of skin on skin, the unstoppable desire to go all the way and more.
You wrap your legs around him, pulling him close. Your hips meet where you most need each other -
“Y/n!” he moans, dropping his forehead against yours. He looks at you, “Still sure?”
“Absolutely, yes,” you answer without hesitation, but then, you remember something, something about what comes next, and say a little quieter, “Just go slow.”
He hears the slight tremor in your voice and something protective blooms in his chest. He feels the weight of responsibility – it’s up to him to make you feel good, and to not cause you pain.
“I won’t hurt you, love, I promise,” he says reassuringly. But when the anxious look in your eyes doesn’t change, his confidence drops. “What is it?”
“You probably will,” you say with a small, uneasy smile. “But it’s okay, really.”
Newt isn’t satisfied with you answer. He frowns, “Isn’t there a way to make it hurt less?”
You shake your head, the feeling of warmth spreading in your chest just at how much he cares for you. “You’re my first, it’s probably going to hurt. But it’s worth it.”
The words run a few circles in his mind.
Eventually, he accepts it. He kisses your temple, “I’ll be gentle, I promise.”
“I believe you,” you smile, and try to ignore the rapid beating of your heart as you feel his dick press against you.
You only nod, nerves getting the best of you.
He starts pushing in, the stretch stinging just a bit. You think it’s not as bad as you feared, until the stinging become more noticeable. You grip his bicep, hissing.
“You okay?” he asks right away. You don’t answer, squeezing your eyes shut, trying to steady your breathing.
“Yeah- just- give me a moment,” you grit, still grasping onto his arm.
“Of course,” he whispers, peppering kisses all over your face in an attempt to distract you from the pain. Once it subsides, you tell him to go on.
And he pushes, inch by inch, and even though the slight sting persists, the desire gets the best of you two.
A breath Newt heaves make you realize he’s fully inside of you now. The feeling of being filled is strange, but oh so good.
He groans, a strained sound, hiding his face in the crook of your neck, trembling just a little. Oh so good.
And there, something weird happens to you. The way he cares deeply, the way every touch means something, the way he loves you and the way he makes you feel wanted. The intimacy is too much too handle – how could you be so lucky to be with this guy? – you start sobbing.
Newt’s heart almost flies out of his chest. His head snaps up. “Does it hurt?” He looks all over you for signs of pain.
“A little,” you whisper, letting another tear slide. “I love you so much.”
He doesn’t really understand what’s going on in your mind. “I love you, too. More than anything.” he cups your cheek, wiping the tears away. “Are you alright? Wanna stop?”
“No.” You sniffle, feeling the pain disappear, desire taking its place. “Actually, you can move.”
“Sure?” He asks, even though he’s barely holding on.
“Yes.” You kiss him, feeling him pull out and push in again, slowly, savoring each second. “Want you,” you say between kisses, “so much.”
“Please,” he doesn’t know why he says it. Maybe because his body asks for more. Maybe because you make him feel like he needs to beg. Either way he doesn’t mind it, only says it again and again as he moves.
His thrusts become more sure every time he pushes into you. And by the way you whimper his name, by the way you unravel under him, he knows he’s been blessed by good heavens to be with you tonight.
He slows just a little to look at you. “Y/n.”
“You’re… the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I’m not saying it just because we’re having sex, by the way,” he chuckles, and you do, too. “It’s a privilege to be with you. Being with you when you smile, when you laugh – and when you break, too. It’s a privilege to be the one you come to when that happens.”
You smile. “It’s a privilege to have someone to come to. I love you.”
You seal the promise with a kiss. And then it grows into something bigger. Passionate. Hot.
You feel the knot coil in your stomach, knowing all too well you won’t last for longer. “Faster,” you say, and so he does.
Good Lord, just a little more.
When he hits a particular spot that makes you choke on his name, that undoes him. He pulls out, covering your stomach with his seed. And when you hear his broken moan, that undoes you. Your fingers leave read marks on his shoulders, not painful but evident enough to make him feel good, to feel yours.
And that’s the best feeling in the whole world.
Newt lays his head on your shoulder, your fingers immediately go to his hair, threading through it. He hums appreciatively.
“Hm?” tired and satisfied.
“I like the way you kiss me,” you say, trying to hide a mischievous grin and failing.
He looks up, eyes lit up and gaze playful.
“What are you saying, love?” he prompts.
“Can you show me again?” you say, and his lips are on yours again.
