They set up camp a little ways away from town because Amelia said they needed to think up a strategy first. It made sense, considering the one time they entered the room they were swallowed up by magic. But the next time Antonio woke up, it wasn't to the sun shining in his face or someone jabbing in the arm. It was to a baby crying.
"Shh! Shut up you stupid thing!"
Lovino looked up from his place near the remains of the previous night's fire. His face was pale in the blue-ish early morning light. The sun hadn't come up yet. "I didn't mean to," he started saying. "I was sleeping and then next thing I knew I was in town and this thing was crying and I just, I couldn't stop it!"
Antonio frowned. The sleep wasn't leaving his brain fast enough. "You did what now?" he asked and stood up.
Lovino panicked when he saw him coming near him. "I don't know why," he said. "It just happened! I swear! And now the shit won't stop fussing!"
When Antonio reached him, he saw a squirmy little baby in Lovino's arms, despite the way the boy was trying to shield it from sight. Antonio wasn't sure what to say. "That's a baby."
"Yeah, no shit," Lovino hissed. "Now help me make it stop crying."
Antonio sighed, still not sure what was going on. He crouched by his side and pulled the baby out from Lovino's arms. "First off, it's not by smothering it," he said. "You'll only make it more upset."
Lovino was quiet as his eyes followed Antonio's every move.
Antonio smiled at the baby's squishy face, all scrunched up and wet from crying. He cradled it in one arm and let it grab at his fingers.
"That's gross," Lovino said when the baby pulled Tony's finger to its mouth.
Antonio shrugged. "It's just a baby," he said. "A hungry baby. We're going to need to figure out what to feed it."
"Mushed up apples," Lovino declared.
"What?" Lovino said, glaring. "That's what my mom gave me when I was little."
"Maybe when you were a toddler, but not when you were a baby," Tony said. "This baby needs milk formula. And probably some more diapers."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Lovino said, holding up his hands. "We're not keeping the thing!"
"It's not a thing, Lovino, it's a person! A little person, but a person," Antonio said. The baby just stared up at him. "And of course not, but we need to get some supplies. It needs to be cleaned and fed and, well, properly looked after!"
"If you guys are done being idiots," Olivia mumbled. "Can you please just go away?"
Lovino gathered up Antonio's coat and grabbed his sister's wallet. He scribbled out a note to his sister and then they were on their way to town. They figured by the time they reached it, the sun would be rising.
"Now we know what your curse is," Antonio said.
"No, really?" Lovino replied, sarcasm dripping from his voice like oil.
The baby was quiet during their walk. Maybe it was the movement that lulled it to sleep, or the cool air; Antonio had wrapped it in his coat so all but its face was covered. It had very fine, dark hair growing in, so it was probably only a couple months old.
When they entered the store, Lovino mostly stayed behind Antonio as they checked out the things on display. There were soft toys in barrels by the front window and furniture towards the back.
"What in gods' names are these?" Lovino asked, looking kind of mortified. He was holding up something that looked like it belonged in a pet store.
"Leashes?" Antonio guessed.
Lovino carefully put it back, but his face remained the same.
"Hello there!" a girl asked. She had large glasses and hair like the sun. "Can I help you find anything?"
Lovino smacked his arm and stepped forward. "Diapers and formula," he said, then muttered, "Idiot," under his breath at Tony.
The girl giggled. "Is this your first one?" she asked.
"What?" Lovino asked and his expression was wiped blank.
"It's okay," she continued. "There's no need to be nervous. "This store has everything you need to get started with your new little addition!"
Lovino looked back up at Tony, who shrugged again. "You think we're--" Lovino started. "And this is our--"
"I think we're going to be needing diapers soon," Antonio cut in.
"Sure thing!" the girl beamed.
She helped them look through everything, figure out the 'desperately need these in bulk' items and the 'could be purchased at a later date' things, and then started scanning everything at the register.
"I think people like you are really admirable," the girl said. "Most people here buy the really gender-specific clothes. Like, who decided pink was for girls and blue was for boys anyways? But yeah, super cool. What her name? Or he."
Antonio didn't have the heart to tell her they weren't really sure what the baby's gender was, so they just bought some clothes they thought were cute. Most of it was turtle and duck themed.
"Uh," he said. Why, at times like those, did his mind decide to temporarily erase the part with all the names. He grasped at the only one he could think of that wasn't his or Lovi's. "Feli."
Lovino shot him a look, but then forced a smile at the sales associate. "It's a family name," he said.
She smiled and nodded. "That's really sweet," she said.
As soon as they were out of the store, Lovino snarled, "Feli? We aren't keeping this thing! And even if we were, we wouldn't name it after my sister."
"It's all I could think of!" Antonio shot back. "It's not like either one of us could have come up with something good on the spot!"
Lovino grumbled something and walked over to a bench. "Let's just change it's stupid diaper, change the clothes, and get going," he said.
"Do you want to use the carrier thing first, or me?" Tony asked.
Lovino opened one of the bags to stare at it. With a sigh, he said, "I guess you've been carrying it long enough. This is gonna look so stupid."
Antonio definitely wasn't about to tell Lovino that he thought it'd be cute. Nope. Definitely not.
The diaper bag opened up into an emergency changing station, so that's what they did.
"This is so weird, doing it out in the open like this," Lovino muttered as he opened up the bottom half of the baby's onesie.
"I've seen people do it," Antonio replied. He pulled out baby powder and a box of wipes.
Lovino made a whining noise as he proceeded to change the baby's diaper. In a matter of minutes, however, it was all done.
"Where did you learn to do that?" he asked.
Lovino shrugged. "We have a big family," he said. "You learn to do a bunch of things."
Antonio really wanted to know what that meant.
"Okay, now to figure out this stupid thing," Lovino muttered and pulled out the carrier. It was like a backpack, but for the front. It also had a head support thing because the baby was too young to hold up her head. Lovino adjusted the straps and then sighed, standing there staring at the carrier. Then he held out his arms. "Hand me the little shit."
"Uh," Antonio said and picked up the instruction page. "I'm pretty sure you're supposed to put the baby in before putting it on."
Lovino groaned to the sky, causing some people to glance over.
"Yeah," Antonio said as he glanced over the picture-by-picture instructions. "You fasten it to your waist, strap the baby in, then raise it up and slip the straps onto your shoulders. Then clip in place, adjust the other straps, and you're good to go."
Lovino undid the carrier and flopped onto the bench, next to where the baby was still laying on the makeshift changing table. He looked over at her and she looked up at him, wriggling her arms and legs. As he was strapping her in, Antonio busied himself with packing up the diaper bag. He put the new bottles and formulas into the little pockets, and then took off the tag from a soft, plush rabbit. When Lovino had pulled up the straps, Antonio jumped in to help clip it in the back.
"There," Lovino said. "Now it's on and this baby weighs too much."
Antonio nodded. Lovino looked so young, and there was a baby strapped to him and he was picking up the diaper bag -- it was just too much. "You look adorable," Antonio breathed.
Lovino's jaw went slack and his eyebrows came together.
Antonio frowned. "You shouldn't use that language in front a child," he said. The little girl was probably a ways away from learning to talk, but that didn't mean it was okay for them to swear in front of her. She might be a fast learner.
"Whatever," Lovino muttered and patted her on the head. "We better get going. When we deposit the little sh-- the little thing, we can return all this garbage."
Antonio had forgotten about that -- the returning the baby thing. Truth be told, he wasn't even sure where to start. Maybe they would get lucky and find 'Missing' posters around town. On the other hand, someone might suddenly point at them and shout, "Kidnappers!"
Antonio was hoping it would be the former rather than the latter.