Emotional Support Satan

ask blog. Lucifer, Nick, Jack and friends  //Admins Jade, Raphael, Al, Hyrule //Icon by @aleksaleksaleksohno

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Could we hear something from Nick? How are him and Luci doing

Hello anon ! We're pretty good, i'm mostly sleeping and i'm craving strawberries. Lucifer hopes i'm not pregnant like duh.

-Nick.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

how is it in the empty with the entity? And basically everyone else who's awake?

Lucifer: Ah, I'm not in the Empty in my universe! I was but here, Jack never stopped Nick from bringing me back and I was restored. I dragged Gabriel out with me along with Balthazar and a few others that we managed to wake up. Castiel and I made an agreement and Jack comes over here on the weekends to stay with me and Gabriel. However for the time I was in the empty, it really sucked. Gabriel kept playing Holla Back Girl on his kazoo and all the rest of us had to listen to it a billion times. I do not recommend. The Entity was pretty upset too. Kept threatening us, which was dumb, nothing it could do to me that I hadn't gone through already and I had the power of annoying brother on my side.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

can i have a hug? i've been really sad lately and lonely. i feel like crying.

Gabriel: Of course! No shame in asking for hugs, especially when we’re here, and more than willing to give them!

Lucifer: It’s a bit difficult to hug an anon, but I bet we can make it work.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Supportive Satan Quote of the Day:

I'm going to build this bookcase before midnight, so help me Dad! -Gabriel, about to regret his major life decisions at 11 pm

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Ask Me Things

Hello, this is your friendly neighborhood Satan blogging out to ask you folks to ask me things. It’s been a hot minute but I’m back and I wanna make more new human friends (or family) in this beautiful new year.  Also! Adam and Michael are hanging out in my house now so they don’t have to be near the Winchesters. I’d be happy to force request for them to answer your asks too

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Will you marry me?

Lucifer: I can’t marry you on Anon, whoever you are. Also you might need to fight Nick and possibly Sam to earn my hand.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Marry fuck kill; Crowley, Asmodeus, Lucifer?

Fuck Asmodeus (like really just.... fuck Asmodeus)

Kill Lucifer

Marry Crowley

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Rude, I thought we were friends.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

would you rather have been either of the other options

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

You have a point there.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Marry fuck kill; Crowley, Asmodeus, Lucifer?

Fuck Asmodeus (like really just.... fuck Asmodeus)

Kill Lucifer

Marry Crowley

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Rude, I thought we were friends.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Supportive Satan Quote of the Day:

"THE BEES ARE COMING!" -Gabriel flying as fast as he can from the gardens moments before thousands of bees descended on heaven, in what will later be dubbed The Great Stinging.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

The empty used to be peaceful until Belphehor showed up. Now all you hear is him and Jack bickering at all times. I am starting to understand why Chuck hates us all now.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Please share one of these embarrassing stories about Lucifer. That sounds great.

Alright. Buckle in. The year is negative 500000000.

We have our main characters: Lucifer and Michael.

So. I heard it from this guy who heard it from this guy who heard it from an angel who heard it from Michael that, all those years ago, Lucifer was just a wee baby. And wee babies have no idea how the world works, especially when no world really exists yet.

So Luci was just toddling around, like ya do, and he ran right into God himself. God, the dick, was busy making some creature or another.

Luci tried and tried to get his attention to no avail. God just didn't give a shit. But Luci wasn't having it, and hatched a perfect little fledgling angel idea.

He yanked The Almighty's pants down.

Legend has it: God wears briefs.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Michael was the main character in that he sat around and laughed about it for hours after

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: This story is actually true. Although you're wrong about the briefs thing. He was commando.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

C'mon and share then, Luci. Was God really all that Almighty?

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Honestly, I've seen bigger. At the time though I was too busy running for my life to value the situation. The creature he was making at the time was the hyena. It's why they can never stop laughing.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Please share one of these embarrassing stories about Lucifer. That sounds great.

Alright. Buckle in. The year is negative 500000000.

We have our main characters: Lucifer and Michael.

So. I heard it from this guy who heard it from this guy who heard it from an angel who heard it from Michael that, all those years ago, Lucifer was just a wee baby. And wee babies have no idea how the world works, especially when no world really exists yet.

So Luci was just toddling around, like ya do, and he ran right into God himself. God, the dick, was busy making some creature or another.

Luci tried and tried to get his attention to no avail. God just didn't give a shit. But Luci wasn't having it, and hatched a perfect little fledgling angel idea.

He yanked The Almighty's pants down.

Legend has it: God wears briefs.

[pansexualdemonbelphegor]

Michael was the main character in that he sat around and laughed about it for hours after

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: This story is actually true. Although you're wrong about the briefs thing. He was commando.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Supportive Satan Quote of the Day

Lucifer: "I put the Sad in Satan"

Sam: "There's no sad in satan"

Lucifer: *cries* "There is now"

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: The only "D" Sam wants to put in me is Death but I feel you

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Supportive Satan Quote of the Day

Lucifer: "I put the Sad in Satan"

Sam: "There's no sad in satan"

Lucifer: *cries* "There is now"

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Belphegor getting all this love when he's not as cool as me. Rude. This is how I know humans aren't the superior species.

[undertaker-02]

Don't be jealous, Lucy! You're super-iper-mega cool and we love you!

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: I'm glad someone still cares. I can make flirt with Dean too if I have to but it might make Nick mad.

[undertaker-02]

You don't need to. Just be yourself! And remember that even if more demons like Crowley or Belphegor appear, they are nothing compared to you, the great Lucifer!

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Very true. You're a smart one. No wonder you're one of my favorites. Now if only I can find a way out of this goopy wasteland. I suppose it isn't called the Empty for nothing.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Belphegor getting all this love when he's not as cool as me. Rude. This is how I know humans aren't the superior species.

[undertaker-02]

Don't be jealous, Lucy! You're super-iper-mega cool and we love you!

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: I'm glad someone still cares. I can make flirt with Dean too if I have to but it might make Nick mad.

[ask-emotional-support-satan]

Lucifer: Belphegor getting all this love when he's not as cool as me. Rude. This is how I know humans aren't the superior species.