“So very awkward.” He held his hand gently. He had honestly missed the cold bite, it was comforting. He could tell his hands had been warmed though. “After all you hesitated to grab my hand didn’t you.” His voice was soft.
He hadn’t expected to be back so soon, he had to admit, but he was glad he decided to. It was strange to disappear for so long after their confrontation but he had to learn more about The Black. It was dangerous. It was on the loose somewhere but he was just glad it wasn’t with him anymore.
Skrael opened his mouth to shoot back a tease, but froze when he heard Avius’s next statement.
He swallowed, and gave the wizard’s hand a light squeeze, hoping to reassure him. “I– yes… I did. But if I may put to rest any fears over what that meant– you see, I–… well, my… concerns about, ah, what is–” he bit his lip, cutting himself off before he stumbled over his words any further.
…Maybe Avius had a point, after all.
After taking a deep breath, though, Skrael tried again. “There is nothing that you could do that would make me hesitate to… try this. My worries do not lie in anything you have done, or anything you are. If I hesitate, now, it is because this is…” he tried to ignore the way his tone was turning frustrated. “It is because this is unfamiliar to me. It is new and– that is a good thing; it is a good ‘new’. I am simply…” He sighed quietly.
“I am a member of The Arcane Order. Whether or not you know what that means does not so much matter as much as, my membership there translates to a duty, a sacred one, which I cannot give up, and– and do not wish to.
“If I hesitate, Avius, it is not for one moment because of anything we have been through together– in fact, that is what makes me,” He held up their still-clasped hands, “Hold on. To you. To us.
“Any hesitation now comes from the fact that I am still trying to puzzle out how to handle us, while also reconciling with… the things I have done. The things I need to do. The things I cannot give up or abandon.
“If… this is a trouble, somehow, or– or a problem, then…” He pursed his lips, taking another deep breath, “We will have to discuss it. But if it is not, then, may I simply ask for patience? I want this, Avius, I do. I am simply–” He frowned. “I am simply–” He could not think of how to express what he wanted to say. The North Wind was not supposed to be afraid of what it meant to hold someone’s hand. The North Wind was not supposed to shy from difficult situations. The North Wind was not supposed to be a coward.
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