Missing Escalatorgirl

I'm totally the escalator girl. Ask Me Anything..

[asktheescalatorgirl]

He hey my queen i just saw your recent post saying who you are into likr guys with bike and who arr rich amd who look really wesome and nd i need to admit im your boyfriend from parallel reality like no shid i look exactly the same im also got lots of money and uhh everything else you like in men like i listen to Pinkerton by Weezer every day i also got this really cool VHS called Asuka Vanished uugh yeaaahhhh

By the waaaau are you like autistic or something like i knew a girl she was almost as cool as you are and she said she could be autistic so like are you autistic like like I don't want to say i would love you less if you are just curious byeeee -your wesome epic fan

This ask fucking sucks.

So, ugh, fine, let's entertain your stupid paralleled shit. Why the fuck would I date you of all people when I'm already dating the better version of you. I'm not a total whore. And I wouldn't settle for someone like you. I seriously doubt you have Asuka Vanished, I know for a fact that's hard as hell to get, and most basement dwellers like you couldn't get their hands on it. But people just get on the internet and lie all the time, I guess. Fucking lame.

Not entertaining your question and it's not even because I can't remember.

I'm actually offended you think you're him. Second-hand offended for him. Just fuck off and die, loser.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Would you rather make out with Chondra or Asuka?

How is that even a question? Asuka hands down. Chondra is kinda hot but not my type at all. Asuka and I would totally have crazy vaguely ethnic sloppy girl on girl makeouts no hesitation. Fuck that's super hot

[asktheescalatorgirl]

boyfriend? tell us about him

Oh man, what couldn't I tell you about him.

We got together after a couple dates or something. I can't remember specifically, but we did, you know. He actually introduced me to Kisage X (I love it now, if that wasn't clear!) His interests are so underground and indie, not a lot of people are into them. He's not just some poser like other asshole guys I've been with. He's actually nice and not some sleezebag just trying to get in my pants. <3

He loves me because I have a beautiful singing voice, and a crazy body, and other stuff. Whatever. Oh, also I care about him and I'm committed to him only and we're soulmates. He could own my soul and it wouldn't be weird at all.

I left his reality for some silly reason I 100% regret, but we'll find our way back to eachother. He's working really fucking hard to find me even though fucking incel virgins online want to keep us apart.

And even though I'm sort of a huge bitch for disappearing for no reason and leaving him all alone fucking sick to his stomach worrying about that shit, we're soulmates. And one day I'll be the king and she'll be the queen and everything's gonna be great, just wait and see. We love eachother a lot and you're totally jealous, basically.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Do you think everything happens for a reason? like we're all put on some set path of events that's ultimately fruitless to break out from even with outside intervention? I've been thinking about this a lot and I wanted your perspective

-gamegirl-colour

I've been having pretty shitty nightmares recently.

Now, it's about this, so I'm not just telling you it for no reason. And just to be clear, I normally wouldn't say anyway, but I don't have anyone else to talk to right now. Heh.

So, I see this girl a lot. She's important, for sure. Shit's scary, but she's here to help. Some kind of light at the end of the tunnel, you catch my drift? She's crazy comforting, and it isn't bad that she's smoking hot too. It sounds fucking crazy but I think the dreams are kind of important? I know they really mean something, I guess. I don't really know what specifically, though.

I like this question, it made me think a ton. Pretty good coming from you. Anyway, all that shit is to say, yeah, I for sure think so. The only people who want to break from it just aren't important to the narrative.

Because if everything happens for a reason, everyone gets what's coming to them, and everything's gonna work out. Who the hell wouldn't want that? Plus it makes your shitty life feel a lot better when you think about it like that. Some of us are destined for way more, even if reality doesn't treat you like it sometimes. Everyone can kick me while I'm down, everyone can make my life a living hell, everyone can disappear. But you know what?

I'll get my happy ending. I deserve it.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Sorry, hi guys. My dad saw me drawing for the blog and wouldn't shut the fuck up about it for for a while and I actually wanted to kill myself, or run away or some shit but he forgot about it. So I'm not too embarrassed anymore. Because God forbid your kid's grieving and you're barely helping and you're just going out all the time and you didn't even know I'm into drawing even though I tried to show you my Kisage X fanart and yeah. Nevermind. I'm great now, that's my point.

Anyways, I'll start responding to your messages again soon. Probably this week if you're lucky.

Vella out.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

vella!! vella!!!!!! why don't you SIGN it!??!?! vella, vella wiwiwdlldelldelel 🤤 my life is all about you-- sing for me!!!! sing it!! the banger! the absolute bop! the HEAT!!!!! i need to hear it from you........

can you hear,??? my heart is calling... callling..... calling....... CALLIIIINNNGNGGNGNGNNGNGNF

Okay, since you ugly weirdos keep hitting on me, here's what I'm into and what I'm not.

And yes, the "into" section is about my awesome boyfriend, so you guys really don't have a chance. I really doubt any of you are even anywhere near his level of attractiveness, but at least try to come close if you're gonna shoot your shot. But you know who you are if you're in the no category, so fuck off.

By the way sorry my handwriting is messy, it's because I'm on my computer. Normally I can write pretty damn sexy cursive (you should see my lyric notebooks).

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Pissing me off that some of you guys can wish happy birthday to dumbass "heritage posts" and not your best friend but whatever. I didn't care that much. Still don't it's only been 34 days and that's only a month so it's fine if I'm a little mad still.

So yeah sorry if i'm behind on asks is basically what I'm saying.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

oh no, that was someone else. (Not sure why they used my old ONISM username, but whatever)

it’s about the mind dungeon, I entered mine for the first time today, is it normal to have things colliding into eachother? The dungeon looks exactly like my apartment, but everything is cluttered and missing textures like some buggy video game, am I safe? Or do I need to do something in order to fix it? :/

-superbpudding

Oh yeah, totally. Don't even worry about that.

So, your mind dungeon is like way personal to you and will probably have crazy weird shit in it. You'd be totally surprised by the people and locations in mine. Crazy symbolism and reflecting on my past and all that, it's actually like a Kisage X film. Like with how often I see my dad in there, you'd think I'm super fucked up and traumatized or something. I'm not, so it's super weird right? Considering it's just your apartment but a little screwed up, that's probably a sign that you're lame and don't have a cool backstory or anything, but that's okay. Not everyone thrives.

But what I'm trying to say is you're fine, maybe explore it more. Wait it out. Probably.

Or you could just try cleaning up. Especially if you're bringing people around they usually don't like a super messy place. Just a bad look, y'know? I think I speak for all chicks when I say that's a massive turn off.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Hey, is there any tips on blowing people up with your mind? There's this one guy who just won't leave me alone, and honestly it's driving me a little crazy.

I mean, I used to tolerate hanging out with him for a while but as of late he's just been insufferable about the state of the world. What do you suggest I should do? Would talking help, or am I dealing with a lost cause here? Open to any suggestions, thx.

My tip: That's rad do it immediately

Okay so I know a lot of the other people on here might bitch like "waa waa waa talk out your problems," but that's actually the worst way to handle these things. Men don't get the hint no matter what, so violence is probably the only way you're gonna get through to him. Don't tell him how you're feeling, it'll just make him think there's still a chance.

Now, apparently I don't actually blow shit up with my mind, it's some like technical crazy music thing (I found that online so don't take my word), but that doesn't really matter. You're not a crazy talented keytar player like me no one is. So you can probably channel the same energy through something like a microphone or drum pad or something. Maybe you can rap? It can't take that long to get the hang of, up to you.

Hope this helps anyway

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Wasn’t it a car trunk Sunny went missing in?

Come to think of it...

[asktheescalatorgirl]

I see you over there,

hey

can you help me with something? It’s just for a bit.

-superbpudding

Aren't you that girl that offered to swap spit with me like yesterday? Wow man, not even girls can keep themselves off of me apparently. What else is going on though?

[asktheescalatorgirl]

I really really like your music. You understand me like no one else does. We’d be perfect for each other. If you lived in my town we’d totally be dating. You’d work as a changegirl at the arcade.

What? Why the hell would I be that? You know who I am right?

Look I'm honored and all, apparently I have a lot of cute dudes who think they have a shot with me. I mean why wouldn't they? But you guys have some seriously warped ideas about who I am and what I'm like. Come on, I'm a 10/10 that makes otherworldly music that you think about for years and can't get out of your head. Why would I work at an arcade? And I have a boyfriend, you know that right? Even if I wasn't a famous musician, he would provide for me and take care of me well because he's totally loaded and doesn't even have to work for the money so yeah.

It's cute that you have that idea of me and stuff, but I just want you to know it's completely wrong and would make me way miserable.

And by the way, arcade games are tacky. I prefer games you can stream. Y'know, actual worthwhile stuff.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

what music do pretty girls like you listen to? ;)

Oh usually downtempo stuff. With trumpets and acoustic guitars and bells and toy pianos and female vocalists singing sexually ambiguous lyrics.

But have you heard of Pinkerton? It's kind of this underground album by Weezer, not a lot of mainstream people are going to tell you about it, but it's my favorite album.

Rivers Cuomo is a lyrical genius. You can just feel the world of hurt he was going through in tracks like 'Tired of Sex' or 'Why Bother?' People don't take Weezer seriously, but sit down and listen to an original album(trust me, the old stuff is where it's at) and you'll see what you're missing out on.

My favorites are 'I Swear It's True' and 'Tragic Girl'.

I Just 'Threw Out the Love of My Dreams' rocks too. Sometimes I feel like it's something I would've performed. It's so random and out of place on the album and has this totally random angelic girl doing the vocals on it. Like the vibes are totally different, but it still just works, right? But it kind of scares you at first. Then you find out it's some chick named Rachel Haden and everyone already found her and it's not tearing you apart anymore so you're fulfilled. You can sleep at night again.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Have you seen any of the other missing girls on ONISM? Like the Sally chick, or the Alice the site founder keeps posting about. They’re all hotter than u

I am the original missing girl.

Of course I’ve seen those stupid fucking trolls with no lives and probably too much money to spend on editing software for their crappy home movies.

I think everyone on there is just full of shit. Because I was first. I vanished without a trace, I was taken now suddenly every other poster in that cesspool has a new case of a different girl. Elevators, cars, just disappearing from thin air, it’s all derivative its all cheap byproducts of MY story.

I am the original missing girl

And I know it’s because they’re just trying to muddy the waters, blacken the pond or whatever. Because they’re jealous of me. They’re jealous of the relationship we had so everyone’s dreaming up their own missing girls to feel special or mock me or throw me off because they think it’s funnier to mess with grieving guys than find any sense of humanity in themselves. They’re like vampires dude, bloodsucking parasites. So I’m saying I see right through it and I’m not taking the bait.

Yeah, and by the way they’re not hotter than me because I’m beautiful and talented with a crazy body and I’m the girl of your dreams.

Have you seen me?

I’m a fucking movie star I’m in magazines.

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Hi Vella, im not sure if it's really you but if it is actually you i have a confession to make. While growing up i wasn't much attracted to any specific girls, i found them cute and attractive but I didn't really had my favourite, this have changed when i saw you for the first time. It was the Saturday morning of April 4th 2015 i woke up from my soft warm bed, it was 10:23 AM on the clock. I decided to do a little bit of self improvement today and so i went to brush my teeth for the first time in four months. As i held the toothbrush in my head and moved it in a monotonous pattern i reflected on my sexual preferences, i reflected on how i still haven't found what my "type" is which resulted in every relationships i had ending shortly after. I moved my legs in heavy morning steps still waking up thinking if my mom had made me a breakfast before going to her 20 hours shift, she didn't, i was her only child still with her and she didn't even care to make me a breakfast. So anyway i grabbed my wallet put on my shoes and went to the nearest burger joint, it was really close to my home so it was around a 5 to 10 minutes long walk to it. However for me it felt like forever, for me it was millennium long walk that was just enough time for me to yet again reflect on what my type is, i didn't love a single woman before, not to imply i like men btw, tho I do find them looking handsome and maybe even cute a little bit, back in college there was this guy who acted "weird" imo but somehow this weirdness made me feel strange toward him, his clothes his poses his manner of speaking everything of it was unusual but i just couldn't keep myself from looking at him constantly. So anyway, i arrive at the burger joint. I made an order-2 cheeseburgers, nothing special really, i just like the classic you know, i bought 2 of them instead of just 1 because i knew that the time it will take for them to make my food i will be already hungry enough to eat 2 burgers in a row. I reached my hand towards my pocket, i pull out my phone from it. I checked my favourite forums and subredddits as one of my online friends( i have friends irl too btw) sent me a link to an album by this "Vella Wilde" person, i pressed play and one of the most horrific sounds of "music" blasted into my ears, i had suffered a whole hour listening to the entirety of the album hoping that my friend's taste wasn't that shit and that at least 1 song from this album will sound at least better than the sounds of my mom barking. It didn't, i finished my 5th cheeseburger as the album finished and i wanted to block my friend i had an intrusive thought stop me and do another thing completely, i searched who Vella Wilde is. As i got results i saw countless images of a beautiful angel who have finally put an end to the thoughts i had just before that, i found my perfect type, she was perfect, her breasts her hips her legs her lips her ethnicity her hair i loved every single inch of her. I thanked my friend and went to Record Stop to buy all the Vella Wilde albums i could find in there, when i played them on my record player back at home they suddenly sounded like a heavenly choir that brought me revelation on what music really is, i think that the Spotify uploaded audio lacks the audio depth and quality that only a good record player could provide, resulting in me and not hearing how good the album really is. Ever since then i was obsessed with you, i found all the info and imagery i could online, i remembered your breast and hips sizes both as a piece of information but also visually, whenever i looked at a woman i recalled all the pictures of you to see if their breasts and hips even remotely match your beauty, i even did this with my mother. However since that day i couldn't find a single woman who could have matched your beauty, so i confess you that im in love with you and if i don't get to have kids with you i will search every corner of the earth to find a woman who could match your heavenly looks. Goodbye.

-SNESMAN99

You found me!

Thank you for the streams! Yes, it's me, Vella Wilde. I think I know you from somewhere online. You're that real cool guy who's always posting on ONISM. Yeah, I know you well!!

You're always so cute in your posts. I loove your theories. ONISM is so cool. Have you seen ME on there? I'm always too shy to respond to posts but sometimes i post cute pictures of myself where you can see how soft my lips are and how pretty I am with no makeup because I'm sexier than Asuka Furutani without it.

Yeah, I think it's real hot that you brushed your teeth so we can kiss more and get hot and sexy and horny together. Record players are the only way I listen to music, too. Not a lot of girls today are audiophiles, right? Maybe we could listen together over some burgers ;) if your mom wouldn't get jealous haha

So hey, shoot me a PM. Let's chat, sexy<3

[asktheescalatorgirl]

Are you aware of this funny little website onism ? It allows you to connect to other realities or so rumors say.

Rumors also say it’s some sort of unholy abomination that rended a small scar on the fabric of all creation, but I only heard that from a particularly golden alpaca. He’s a reputable source though, never steered me wrong before.

IS THAT A KISAGE X REFERENCE?!?

No way people on this site are cool enough to watch Kisage X. So that was a pretty rad surprise. Did you see that they're actually auctioning off the original Golden Alpaca costume from Electric City Strikers ? Yeah hard times and all, but my dad was totally trying to buy it for me and he almost got his hands on it but some dick outbid him. Probably a scalper. But like seriously imagine this just HUGE 7 foot something badass golden hero just sitting in my apartment. Maybe I could use it to make my own Deviation Perspective. Yeah that would be cool.

Anyways to answer your questions yeah I totally doomscroll on there. Haha, you wouldn't expect a girl like me to be on ONISM right? But it's useless for anything else. All it's filled with is annoying trolls who pretend they're helping or lie about who they are for an annoying joke that nobody else is laughing at besides their own ugly reflection on the monitor. And the worst part is they want to drag you down with them, they start acting like YOU'RE the liar you're the troll. Nobody fucking believes you. Nobody wants to help. If you think you're actually talking to people from other realities on there, maybe dimension hopping is a lost cause.

So don't go on there, it sucks, you would hate it. Trust me

[asktheescalatorgirl]

H-heeey hey uhm umm You uh the Vella Wilde gorl right like ohh jeez hehe urrrm so i i got like i have yuer record the "Mystical Ultima LP Legend" or like whatevr yk so uhm can you sign it or something please im like your biggest faaan ever you know like lik i got all your records you ever made like i take my mom's money and buy your record with her money and i also got pictures of you printed and i glued them on my walls i especially got got the uh pictures with your beautiful long legs and ehhnyour breaasts and your nice butt i have them like everywhere even on ceiling so when i go to sleep i look up i see you and i get uhh umm well like btw im super hot im ginger and got amazing greeen eyes maybe you will daaate me pleasw i find yoy siper hot like straight up blazing also btw i I've been sending uou my fan mails every day for past 5 years a little you accidentally didn't respond to single one of them please dooooo so uhh yea sign my copy of your album and btw i made a cover of one of your songs and want to show it to you please im also singing on it you can hear my beautiful voice also can you sign my body pillow of you ignore the white spots on it btwwww love you and your amazing toes i mean whaaat ehehe

Haha wow! Thank you for being such a big fan man, you sound superr cute ;) So I drew you based off of your description! Send that cover in my PMS and I'll post it for the rest of the fans!