nothing could convince you to believe that a frat party would be a hell of a good time.
âI have too much shit.â you annunciate, yeeting a pencil in your best friendâs general direction. âAsk Mina. Iâm sure sheâd find sweaty people and an uncanny amount of booze fun.â
your model of a roommate sulks.
bummed you werenât like the rest of the girls around here.
like who in their right mind would decline an invite to the biggest frat house in SK?
âLeave it to you to pass on a good time. Boo, tomatoes.â
you send her a merciless smile. âI feel less of a detriment to society this way. Have you seen me in anything other than sweats and a hoodie? It takes effort to look as good as you. Effort I cannot spare for myself.â
âTalk about dramatic.â
dramatics aside,
there was nothing that could possibly be done to drag you out of this dorm room and into the pits of hell called TBZ.
that godforsaken frathood might drive you off a cliff.
youâll give them the benefit of the doubt.
they were far from hideousâ a sight for sore eyes really.
intelligent, sociable, and athletic.
all 11 of them.
even if 2 happened to both your exes.
once upon a time..
âWell, iâm leaving.â the gorgeous red head flips her hair, model figure hugged in the little black dress she sported. âIf iâm not back by morning, send a search party. I love you! Donât study too hard my little book worm.â
yes.
there were some perks to being roommates and best friendâs with your polar opposite.
a stable social life.
free clothes.
and invites to the biggest parties?
too bad you hardly found any of those to be useful to you.
âHello?â
âY/n?â her voice sounds irritated, slightly slurred and strained against the echoing music of the party. âY/n, can you come get me? Fuckâ these people are losers. Iâm drunk.â
you grimace.
sheâs upset.
itâs only midnight and of all peopleâ
Taeri was upset.
âDid something happen?â you mumble sleepily, sitting up to turn on a light. âAre you okay? DId someone hurt you?â
too drunk to process the question, she groans. âWill you just please come and get me? I feel like Iâm gonna explode.â
âO-okay, just give me a coupleââ
the call flat lines.
great.
the day has finally come that the stars aligned on a full moon night.
albeit, you still didnât think the frat party was gonna be a good time,
but i guess youâll bite.
it didnât take long to wash up a little, whipping out one of Taeriâs hand me downâs.
10 minutes longer and you had your liner drawn and a simple red tint to your velvet lips.
you absolutely dreaded having to face the day youâd ever come to thisâ
a strapless top, tight jeans and mid height high heels.
but you had some class.
you werenât gonna be a detriment to society by showing up in half ass pjâs.
âHey.â
the hottie by the door makes a double take.
âH-hello.â
your forehead creases, eyes looking into the still much alive party. âArenât you gonna ask for my name, pretty boy?â
pretty boy doesnât respond.
honestly, too stunned to answer.
because god damn.
god damnâ
âDamnit.â Eric blinks furiously, wiping at his shirt upon spilling some of his drink. âSorry, name?â
âY/n.â
âY/n, youâre on the listâ Y/n?â
at this point, heâs completely disregarded his drink.
the rest spilling all over his thousand dollar shoes.
âY/n.â you affirm with a slight chuckle. âTaeri called. Is she alright?â
no, of course sheâs not.
the sole reason for her coming, being her ex boyfriend who happens to live hereâ
who undoubtedly was the cause of the phone call in the first place
âWell all hell hasnât broke loose yet.â Eric manages to make it through a sentence. âYou donât normally come to these things, donât you? Taeri said youâre not much of a party goer.â
âGreat observation, pretty boy. I was summoned. If Taeri wasnât in trouble, whyâd she call me then?â
he aimlessly shrugs. âHyunjae hasnât touched you hot model bestie all night. I mean Sunwooâs back in town so maybeââ
oh god.
OH MY GOD.
fucking hell on earth.
âHey, didnât you and Sunwooââ
âNo I donât know a Sunwoo.â you elicit a pressed panicked grin. âAnd Sunwoo doesnât know me. Are we understanding each other? Do I make myself clear, pretty boy.â
the pretty boy grins back. âFucking crystal.â
you pray to the stars in the sky to disarrange.
you pray for anything but the storm that brews ahead.
you pray for the sake of your roommate,
that this was nothing but a coincidence.
ââ that Sunwooâs back in town, can you believe it?â
you refrain from putting that stranger into a chokehold.
wanting nothing but to be home in your covers.
youâre no cinderella but,
itâs past your damn bedtime.
âWhere the fuck is she?â You mumble to yourself incoherently, searching the heavily intoxicated crowd for your best friend.
leave it to her to make you the damn search party.
these heels were killing you.
but those heels on you werenât just killing you,
it was killing everyone else too.
âYou wonât believe who just walked in.â Eric came back to his group of troublemakers, kissing his lips through a devious smirk. âGod damn, you wonât believe me when I tell you. Who just walked through our fucking doors.â
Sunwooâs a little less interested.
tired is a simple word to describe his current attitude.
he just got back into town, man.
itâs been a stressful week for him.
the last thing he wants to deal with was Ericâs crazed nonsense.
Hyunjaeâs shoulderâs perk from on top of the counter. âIf youâre talking about my god forsaken ex again, weâve already crossed paths. Like fourth party in a row.â
âNot your ex.â
Ericâs feverish.
heâs only heard about the legend of y/n.
the closed-off maths geek Sunwoo had a boner for freshman year.
the hardly qualified best friend of the hottest model on campus.
âBut sheâs so fucking hot though.â Eric dreamily drools, nodding from the corner in which they gather. âSheâs drop dead gorgeous, Sunwoo. How could a star soccer player like you, drop a once in a lifetime shot like that?â
âWhat the fuck are you on about, youâ youâre kidding.â
the star soccer player canât remember the last time he saw you.
well, to be fair, the last time he saw you,
you were in an oversized hoodie, worn-in sneakers, and sweats doubled your size.
now people are expecting him to believe his ex girlfriend stalked the halls of his houseâ
in stunning Louboutins nonetheless.
leather tight top hiked too far up the stomach, cleavage half out and bed hair making you look like a 5-star Michelin.
those heels.
the heels are killing him on you, he doesnât know what to do.
âYouâre fucking kidding.â Juyeon jumps from his seat, the rest of the males following suit like a pack of hungry wolves. âThatâs her?â
Sangyeon whistles at all that. âIâll be damned.â
Sunwoo canât say a thing.
nope.
heâs not allowed to.
leave it to you to sweep the entire party of their feet right after he did.
âTaeri!â you call, unbeknownst to the lingering eyes around you. âTaeri, where are you!â
your heels click at the tiles,
excusing yourself in the crowd like the prim you are.
noting to run as soon as you find,
âKim Sunwoo.â
your breathâs taken away.
haphazard and eyes blown out of their sockets.
you canât run if heâs the one that finds you.
âSunwoo, Iââ
he doesnât let you manage even a word.
clearly wonât let you say a thing.
not that you werenât allowed to.
after all,
heâs the one that got away.
âNot you.â you tear his hands from tugging on your wrists. âOf anyone in this damn frat house, not you, Kim Sunwoo. I want absolutely nothing to do with you.â
leave it to Sunwoo to look at you like the mad man he is.
the hot shot playboy of IST,
this was your sumptuous ex boyfriend.
your only ex boyfriend.
ââ the last thing I want to see. Get away from me.â
his eyes roll and he pins you to the wall of his bedroom,
making sure to lock the door behind you.
âThe last thing I want to see is my beloved ex girlfriend showing up half naked at one of my frat parties. But lifeâs unfair isnât it?â
he elicits a pitiful snort and you dare yourself to retort back. âThe thought never bothered you before when you begged me to be your damn side piece, once upon a time.â
âOnce upon a time, you were mine. Let me make myself very clear, you were my girl. And right now, I donât get that luxuryâ iâm not allowed to call you that.â
âIf youâre looking for permission, youâre far from it. Iâm not here for you, iâm here for Taeri.â
Sunwooâs never liked that girl.
always trying to get you to wear the skankiest clothes.
present you like a centerpiece.
taking you whenever she wanted.
(she had her work cut for her)
when all he wanted was you all to himself.
âTrying to prove yourself by being hotter than her?â
you pry his body off of you,
heated.
absolutely heated you could explode.
âTrying to prove myself by not being a damn joke. Isnât that what I was to you, once upon a time Kim Sunwoo? The reason you dropped me because I could never prove myself to be the girlfriend in Kim Sunwooâs hot fucking life.â
his chest rises and falls as fast as his blood boils.
he always loved firing you up.
you were so hot, he couldnât tell you why.
but he always wanted to strip you out of your oversized clothes and get you completely naked anyway.
the thrill of seeing you naked being a blessing in disguise.
right now,
you were already half way there.
âI loved you.â
âLoved me?â you laugh incredulously. âThe sex was good but other than that, what can you say you loved about me? Other than lying to my face, nearly ripping out my hair, telling me your cock only belonged to me? But digging it inside other women like that didnât matter at all.â
heâs taken by surprise.
that dirty mouth of yours.
heâs been needing a stress relief.
and suddenly, heâs not that stressed about any of his circumstances.
especially the ones he faces right now.
in fact, heâs more laxed than heâs ever been in his entire life.
âStill thinking about my cock, are you?â
âYours and 5 others, baby. It stopped being all aboutââ
his lips crash against yours and the wall is suddenly your best friend.
so much for Taeriâ
god, Kim Sunwoo was just so irresistible.
âYou.â he growls into your lips while ripping off his shirt. âItâs always been all about you, hasnât it?â
an arduous moan escapes your tethered lips,
melting in the hands of your inconceivable ex boyfriend.
âIm gonna make those 5 others look like training wheels, baby. Iâm going to make sure you know who you belong to.â
itâs been 2 years.
you werenât gonna wallow over your breakup with Sunwoo forever.
yes, youâve slept with other people but damn.
other people will never be Kim Sunwoo.
âI wonât even have to beg for you to be my side piece when iâm finished with you.â
Taeri and Hyunjae were fine.
Taeri was upset but hey,
Hyunjae beat you to it anyway.
while Sunwooâs beating into you,
Taeri stops to look at her ex, âHave you seen y/n? She said she was gonna come get me.â
Taeriâs never really liked Sunwoo for you either.
he was always possessive.
always center of fucking attention.
too big and mighty for her little know it all.
but god damn.
if there was anyone who made you happier than sheâs ever seen you,
it was that poor unfortunate soul.
âSheâs gonna eat him alive.â Taeri chuckles with her hand on her exâs lap. âPoor thing, y/nâs balled up her anger for him for years. You think heâs gonna be okay?â
that was the thrill of you, you know.
always one step ahead of everyone else,
Sunwoo had to put a leash on you.
he was so tired of chasing,
âYouâve let go, Sunwoo.â youâre hyperventilating over his broad chest. âWhereâs all that control you had now?â
you were gonna be the death of him.
he had to juggle loving you, paying the frat, his soccer careerâ
âIâm sorry.â
3 rounds later and Sunwooâs spent.
ravishing in your beauty,
the yearning of something he didnât think he needed in a long time.
you made him the happiest man alive once upon a time.
âI donât deserve you.â
3 rounds later and you were convinced.
ravishing in his warmth and comfortâ
you havenât felt this content in a long time.
âYou deserved all of me.â
you loved him.
god you loved him and you donât know how to stop.
2 years later and heâs still the man you love.
âI loved your wide smile. I craved your touch. I wanted your attention every damn day and you deserved every minute of having me. I loved everything about you, Kim Sunwoo. But you made that decision to let me go a long time ago.â
he kisses the places your tears stain,
fingers shakily threading through your now long hair.
âI was tired of convincing myself all of that was true. Tell me, baby. What else did you love about me?â
you catch your breath, nose brushed against his.
âYour eyes. Your nose. Your dick.â
his throaty laugh fills your ears like music on christmas morning. âWhat else, baby?â
you lean in, humming against his cheek.
eyes shut in absolute bliss.
remembering the subtle scent of bergamot and sage that stained his skin.
âYour lips? The way they move when you kiss me. How they feel when you tell me you love me.â
his arms clasp around your hips.
high on your euphoria with you pressed against him like this.
the stars were in his favor tonight.
perfectly aligned in the sky when he finally tells you,
âI love you.â
youâre convinced heâs joking.
you have to convince yourself he was making you a joke.
but Sunwoo holds you like heâs gonna lose you.
afraid you were gonna let go.
âIâll never deserve you but iâll love you for the rest of my life if I have to in order to convince myself I do.â
âWhat do you love about me, Kim Sunwoo?â
the full moon is in your favor.
illuminating the room just enough to meet his colorful eyes.
just enough color to remember how he looked at you once upon a time.
âThat youâll be the only girl that I get to love in my entire life. I donât want to be with anyone else but you, baby. Not even if the stars start crossing in the sky.â
you a side piece?
hardly.
no, Kim Sunwoo never left your side.
he was like an overbearing parasite,
only having to move elsewhere when he wanted to be on top.
or when he kneels in front of you to ask you to be his wife.
and to think he wouldâve had to beg once upon a time.
i donât know if iâll come back to atinybitofau soon. i have some rough edits i need to do on some old stuff before i come back.. on a good note! I have drafts for a near futureâ maybe. In the mean time, please enjoy TBZ content.
if my moots are still alive and not dry, I love yaâll.
RECAP: training with the boys begins and frustrations between you all get heated. Seonghwa offers you a kind gesture of motivation to get you to learn how to fight.
Yunho has never recalled seeing such a pathetic attempt at shooting in his entire life. Up until today when he saw the way your hand trembles around a gun. San, on the other hand, was elated to watch you suck at every single thing you tried to do. You were downright frustrated knowing: learning how to shoot, physically defend yourself, and fighting back wasnât something you sought to learn.
He kept his hopes high though, Yunho, wanting to see you prosper at the side of his ruthless boss. And even if San thinks otherwise of the circumstances, Yunho assumed your place beside Seonghwa would do the heartless southside king justice. Being with him for so long, Yunho knew of Seonghwaâs shortcomings. Love was undoubtedly one of the assets Seonghwa never had. Seeing as heâs at least trying, Yunho wanted to help out the fact.
He had become frustrated too whilst teaching you and decided maybe you needed a breather.
You were quiet despite Sanâs failed efforts to get into your head with his rambunctious insults. You only stared at the ground while the other two pondered over new ideas. You werenât trying at all. Youâd like to think itâs because you refuse to take part in justifying yourself for a self proclaimed husband. Honestly, you just had little motivation to try let alone exert any unnecessary efforts.
âYour husbandâs arrived early.â A meddling voice fills your empty mind. âHeâs on his way to pick your ass up so look alive.â
Your lips curt a faint affirmation before taking your things and beelining for the buildingâs locker room. There was soft excitement that frenzied deep down in your stomach as you changed. Not that being around a bunch of buffoons bothered you much but youâd much more prefer the company of a senile swine like your husband than them any day. As pathetic as they sounds to you...
Sanâs picking at his nails cooly on the outside patio while Yunho leans against a pillar. Youâre sat cozy in a chair with your bag over your lap as you all await the said mob bossâ arrival.
âFashionably fucking late, as always.â San seethes through gritted teeth. âDoes that asshole not know I have better things to do than babysit his sorry excuse for a wife?â
San was getting sick and tired of it already. Of course, unbeknownst to you, San absolutely adored his precious leader. It doesnât excuse the fact that your obnoxiously attractive self gets to settle down with his own first love. To add to it, Seonghwa was effortlessly throwing you around like a treasure that must be watched at all times. Somehow, San realizes the time Seonghwa claimed he had when bargaining his new gift did not exist. So here San was doing Seonghwaâs bidding yet again.
Yunho notices the clench in Sanâs tight look and glares into his own. âSannie. Letâs not get careless.â
âBastard better think twice if he thinks Iâm gonna still be sleeping in his house after this.â
San glances at you with no momentary comfort before sticking a cigarette into his lips. You note the face of shock that masks on Yunhoâs face but says nothing at all.
âHeâs here.â Yunho coughs out while glaring at the cancer stuck between Sanâs lips. âKill that stupid thing.â
âWith pleasure.â San growls back eyes groveling at you.
âSan.â
You stand up upon seeing Seonghwaâs knowing glare from the cracked window of his sleek black SUV. The tables turned on the fellows around you when your heels flick on an opposite direction. Being unwanted never bothered you. Being unwanted forced into a situation has not once bothered you. Being victim to it and having the choice to walk out? Now thatâs an additional option youâve never always have and will always willingly take. You donât do unnecessary efforts. And you know when you arenât wanted.
You ignore him with a long press of your volume up button.
âStop being stubborn, y/n.â His voice gets harder. âIf I have to get out of this car so help me god Iâllââ
You snatch an earphone out of your ear. âYouâll have San deal with me?â
He abruptly brakes when you do. You let out a grunt of vexation before placing an earbud back in your ear.
Seonghwa decides to park his car right then and there to throw you over his shoulder like a sack of rice. Your face flushes in the hottest color of pink as you try to break free.
âS-SEONGHWA WHAT THE HELL?â
âThisâll be what stubborn gets you from now on.â
You resort to sulking in the front seat as your husband possesively holds his hand on the surface of your thigh. You donât bother even looking back at where the both of you left San and Yunho, irritated eyes strewn on the outside of the moving vehicle.
âIâm assuming your training didnât go too well.â He comments while driving faster this time.
You donât reply making Seonghwaâs fingers twitch on your lap. So much for convincing yourself you arenât wanted.
âY/n, Iâm no psychic. You need to tell me if something bothers you.â
You scoff. âAnd what, Seonghwa? Youâre gonna fix it?â
âI most definitely will try if thatâs what you entail me to do.â
You donât move from your position as your husband drives you to what you know is back home. The eerie silence that fills the both of you in the car makes your gut clench. His fingers on your thigh arenât helping the entire car ride either.
Seonghwaâs presence to you reminded you of air. He wasnât a nuisance to have around and for an appraising relationship to move forth with lesser issues, thatâs a good thing. Actually, to add to the fact, Seonghwa was much more meaningful company than anyone else. He never crossed any unnecessary lines and if he did, he did so with grace. It was hardly something you canât sleep on.
He escorts you, with a distance between you two, towards your shared room and it feels domestic. Thereâs little need for words. Neednât questions either. Seonghwa was far from an open book, but heâs not the type of novel that pegged your fancy anyway.
Seonghwaâs back was to you as he stripped out of his dark suit, shoulders bared with torturous temptation. Your mind was clouded no thoughts head empty when he brings you out of your trance with a slight quirk of his chin around his shoulder.
âI can at least draw to a conclusion,â He just keeps pushing the subject of matter you refuse to shed light on. âthat the basics of living with a man like me werenât taught to you properly then.â
Your face becomes shaded with amusement. âLiving with a man like you requires basic training?â
âYou always think so little of me, my precious wife.â
You feel like youâre in some fanatical love storyâ how fast he is to getting to your place, finger upon the tip of your chin. He lifts your gaze up onto his eyes with certainty and slight amusement too.
âI may not be of some threat to you but some people will think of you to them. Iâm an expensive man and I donât spend my money and the likes of it on just anybody.â
A twitched smile screws your expression. âAnd thatâs supposed to impress me?â
âScare you a better word for it.â He slips on a low cut long sleeve and a pair of casual pants before dropping you onto his lap. âI need to know. That at all times Iâm never with you.. youâre prepared to take down the worst.â
Your breath hitches at the back of your throat as his fingers grace the exposed skin on your neck. His lips take upon the deed of pressing a sweet kiss, the feel of pain besting you. You donât realize in the blur of the pleasure how a throbbing pain lingers where his lips lift.
âI know I promised not to take things too far but if you have no reason to fight, Iâll have to offer you one.â
Itâs not a mark of lust nor was it a bite of love. It was a mark for people to see. It was a caligraphy of his own sort, making itvlegible for anyone to read. His lips relieves the vibrating pain and youâre curious. You turn to face him and his breath meets yours. You get caught up in something that isnât there but you can taste. It was like something you need. A lot like air.
âIt was meant for your skin.â He reassures you taking an inch of space back. âItâs not inclined for you to believe itâs also for your lips sake.â
You chuckle softly no blush apparent to his notion. âWhat a romanticist.â
He boredly hums. âSeems so.â
You wear a shirt that reveals the mark as if youâre proud to bear it. No, itâs not pride you feel entitled to, itâs the meaning. It gives you reason to fight.
Seonghwa stands beside you while you throw punches; in front of you when you kick and swing so he can teach you how itâs done.
Itâs then you realize why heâs Southsideâs king and why he deserves his title.
âYunho informed me that your lack of skill was overbearing this afternoon.â Seonghwa speaks highly, eyes dawned with amusement and amazement. âThat or Iâm just one hell of a good teacher.â
You lean over to help him up. âI didnât have a reason to defend myself. I think I do now.â
RECAP: you finally have to close the deal with the devil and you meet with Hongjoong one last time before becoming a married woman. you also decide to postpone a honeymoon for another time.
Turns out Jongho had a thing for weeding out the imperfections, flaws in a woman. It was easy for him, arriving no later than 11 in the morning to join both you and San after your dress fitting to do your hair.
âI can fix the hair.â The city turned country gangsterâs lips grimace at the dark bags under your drooping eyes. âThe makeup.. youâll have to do on your own, sweetheart.â
You clutch on the silver necklace heâs handed you before he put his hands on your head, the thought of blessing Seonghwa with an engagement gift beyond your intentional rights. You play with the small compass charm between your fingers and gaze at your reflection in the mirror.
So you look like complete shit: lack of sleep, lack of encouragement, lack of pride. This was you in your most pitiful state and the boys could only spare mercy in your absence of excitement. Youâve always dreamed about family and weddingsâ the trends in modern life you were never entitled to try. Seonghwa was already giving you parts of the world youâve always wanted and you couldnât hate him for that. The arrangement however was something youâll have to hold against him.
âYou look beautiful.â Yunho nods in your direction after Jongho fluffs at your curled hair. âY/n, you do. Now stop frowning and making it worse.â
You let out an upheaval sigh. âRemind me again why I have to dress up for such a casual occasion.â
San scoffs from the side still nitpicking his sleek suit. âThis is your wedding, y/n. Have some respect for yourself. Itâs the least you can do.â
âItâs a wedding with a man I donât even want. And he said so himself this was more a partnership than ties of love.â You force yourself to retort in the nicest way possible. âSeonghwa has good intentions and thatâs great. But my place in his heart is not something I earned and Iâm far from pleased.â
âYou rather woo Seonghwa? Then do it, at least, after your wedding.â Yunho charmingly places his chin over your shoulder to face you in the mirror. âThis wedding is passed formalities but something he sought good for the both of you. He wants you to feel comfortable and thatâs leeway enough to your heart. Accept it as it is and maybe you wonât get shot.â
You hear it so many times, you ponder over thought of maybe wanting to get shot at this point. Why was Seonghwa so prideful? What else was he hiding?
âThe day he ever wants to shoot me is the day I end this partnership of his he claims is good for the both of us.â
The trio behind you pause in their movements and let your answer sink in. Itâs not everyday they get to see a woman get ready to marry a man they assume to be their best friend. It certainly isnât every day they get to see a woman as beautiful as you sit in front of them with a personality as fierce as their empty hearted boss. Although theyâre intimidated, they feel a particular sense of relief knowing youâre fully aware of your circumstances. They didnât sign up for meddling in an innocent life though youâre far from innocent.
âWe have to meet some of our partners..â San clears his throat as you fumble with the jewelery in your hand. âIâm sure you wonât mind if we leave you with your thoughts for a bit.â
âNot at all.â please.
They hum in response before setting out prompt, your thoughts a little more blind in your head than they think. You look in the mirror after they leave and think to yourself that youâre just a penny of satisfaction. The best way for you to accept all this is to breathe and let it go. Itâs gotten you this far.
âI hope Iâm not interrupting.â A voice echoes through the slit of the door. âIf you havenât tried killing yourself already.â
Your eyes light up like a child on Christmas Day. âHongjoong.â
His lips quirk at your tone of admiration. âYou look beautiful, babe.â
Your own lips quiver and youâreholding back the years of tears. âCan you hug me please? Just this once?â
He sighs softly before coming over to take you into his arms. The homey embrace of someone you trustedâ no someone who trusts you was enough to end some misery. The one thing Seonghwa could grant you that youâd thank him for was this. Hongjoong was far from what you deserve but heâs someone you wished you could have. Life served you another platter and you canât just complain and ask for a refund.
âOf all the years Iâve known you, y/n, seeing you in a wedding gown would be the last thing Iâd ever imagine.â
You roll your eyes at the city mobster before turning in your chair. âIâm surprised he let you imagine let alone show up today.â
Hongjoong presses his lips together and fumbles with his tie. âThereâs a lot of things youâd be surprised by.â
You sniffle mostly to undermine all the overwhelming thoughts in your head. Hongjoong sees right through you though.
âIâm sure Seonghwaâs got good intentions. Despite the fact, obviously, Iâm not all for the things he doesâBeyond what he does, y/n, heâs a good guy.â
You scoff his way, looking elsewhere in your reflection afraid of his words.
âAre you here to patronize the enemy some more or walk me down the aisle?â
He chuckles wholeheartedly, coming over to plant a reassuring kiss on the top of your head. Where your father lacked, Hongjoong picked up. You canât name a single manâ no person on this planet who has made you whole enough as Hongjoong does and maybe why Seonghwa is threatened. Hongjoong is a force no one is reckoned to feel accustomed to. The city monster had ties everywhere. Feeling sorry for your father was one thing; feeling sorry for you was little of what the truth was.
âYou are a gem.â He annunciations through a genuine smile. âBe it Seonghwa nor I arenât lucky to have. Youâre a blessing.â
You look into Hongjoongâs eyes with a type of everlasting loyalty you canât define. âHow can you be okay with Seonghwa having me? I was already yours..â
âYour father was mine and I let you have the benefit of the doubt.â His comment sharpens at the end.
âLosing him was nothing but means to end for you. Donât act like it was more than that.â You try to rebuttal.
âIt was something I didnât like but it sure as hell made you happy. And so I heard.â
Hongjoongâs very casual. He likes to be hands on in a moment and is, trend wise, very different from your future husband. Itâs not like you loved Hongjoong romantically or anything. It just felt wrong to need to love someone else thatâs all.
âWalk down the aisle.â He whispers again against the crown of your ear, hand hovering over your bare shoulders with hesitance and grace. âIâll always be right here when you need me the most.â
Itâs some misdirection partly. Also partly your fault that youâve gotten here. Now youâre walking down an aisle with Southsideâs very own devil standing at the alter awaiting you. You donât look back on purpose. That and Hongjoongâs grip right beside is not one on par with a fatherly gesture. Hongjoong probably wanted to wring Seonghwa for what itâs worth too.
âPast formalities?â Hongjoong mumbles when you two get one step closer to the end of your suicide mission.
âDefinitely past that.â
âKnock em dead, sweetheart.â
Let the party commence.
There was little shared words between you, your new husband, and the pastor. With what seemed like false devotion and empty promises, the wedding reception began. You two sat together on a podium where itâs pretty obvious Seonghwaâs treated like royalty. You were right in his district and with first impressions comes clear boundaries to be made. He wanted you to know where he stands. You two sat together as husband and wife but complete strangers. It was awkward watching the sight of men come and go to prove that Seonghwa was nothing but a merciless mafia boss. The gifts werenât even of your benefit either.
Hongjoong left early (something youâll press against him some other day forward) and you were stuck thinking about when this cursed day was going to end. Somehow someway it did and you were in a car fraternizing with the enemy this time.
ââ So you married me instead?â
The air gets thick. It almost gets so thick you think youâre getting some type of allergic reaction to his face in the confinement of his wide vehicle. Staring at him was no gut wrenching eye sore but itâs not something you were used to just yet. Seonghwaâs eyes matched the color of warâ red with fury and relent. There was something there that his calm tone didnât quite express to itâs fullest capability.
âYouâd rather be dead?â
His coldness reflected on you. Itâs probably your bodyâs natural mechanism of defense coming to play because youâre sure as hell youâre not gonna let some man control you for the rest of your life. No, you may not get that right to speak up and say something that might as well get you killed but you still arenât gonna let him walk all over you.
âAre you gonna get out of your dress or did you want me to strip you out of it for you instead?â
His tone persists as he emerges from the bathroom to see you sitting on solemn. You glance up tiredly at the cheeky bastard whoâs lips perk at your attention. You look away without a word at all before taking your dress off without further notice.
His throat clams up at the sight, unsure of how long his self constraint would last even for the night. The sight of your broadened narrow shouldersâ bare and ready to tasteâ was something he was definitely not prepared for. His hands tremble as the damp towel between his fingers drops and you glance to look at him.
âTempted?â You rasp in the most taunting voice you could fabricate. âMind me, but you asked if I was going to get out of my dress, Seonghwa. Iâm showing you that I can follow basic instructions, was that not what you asked of me? Of this partnership.â
He chokes on that, jaw clenched. âPressing my buttons, honey, is not something I suggest you test.â
You hold your dress up back to your chest as you turn to face him. âIâm just letting you know what kind of wife you gambled to marry, my sweet husband.â
He nearly screams the moment you slam the bathroom door. Not realizing on both sides that either of you were ready to combust. You shower the anger, the resentment away and Seonghwa just lays back on his bed staring at the bathroom door.
He needs to stay away from you at any time possible. Until he learns to control himself at least. Living with a woman, a woman of his absurd dreams, was proving itself difficult. You werenât just gonna give yourself up to him just like that either.
âSleep. You have a busy day tomorrow.â Is all he says before turning on his back when you shut the lights off.
You stare at it. Like the night before when he got in bed without even saying a word, feeling cold.
âJ-Just me?â You ask propped still on your elbow in the dark.
âI have business to take care of in the city. Youâll have San and Yunho tomorrow.â His voice lulls deeper as heâs getting pulled to his exhaustion. âItâs training you have to endure just in case. Hongjoong informed me you never took part in your fatherâs extravaganzaâs and I need to know my wife is safe while I leave.â
RECAP: southsideâs little devil brings you home to his boss and you both spend the night together for the first time. the next day is filled with eventful surprises. serves purpose, itâs about time you meet your future husband.
It started with childish attraction and before he knew it, obsession. Seonghwa wanted to know where you were, what you were doing, who you were withâ he wanted you on his mind 24/7. If not his mind, in his peripheral. And like San says, heâs a petulant man. If he was offered the oppurtunity to not move a finger, heâll take it. And though getting you was easy, learning to have you was proving itself difficult already.
Hongjoong had his own desires and call it jealousy but Seonghwa didnât like the fact Hongjoong had the most beautiful woman wrapped around his finger. Knowing you were already somehow bound to city side, Seonghwa wanted to take you out of it as soon as possible. To him, you were a prize that he wanted. A prize that he couldnât lose to Hongjoong. Heâs already lost enough to the city scum.
You woke up remembering the bed dipped a little late at night. San was very hospitable in your arrival and you werenât exactly mourning your fatherâs deathâ moreso exhausted that it took so long.
The moment you arrived, you were content on taking a nice cold shower and heading to bed. After settling down a little, inhaling this new scent you were forced to familiar with, you laxed in solemn lonesome and buried yourself in a bed that wasnât yours. At first, it were strange to you the string of events that happened in no less than 24 hours now. You came to accept it as easily as you did to your fathers gruesome history. While you slept however, the scent you lulled to strengthened and a presence youâve never felt was suddenly there.
Seonghwa was quiet; relaxed and seeming stressed enough not to care that you were already sleeping on the other half of his bed. He fell asleep beside you that night and you only glanced at his back for a brief minute before closing your eyes again. You woke up to the same silence Seonghwa arrived in and his scent lingered away.
On Seonghwaâs mind, he can feel you staring. He can feel your curiosity and it feeds his desires more. He canât explain how hard it is not to turn around and face you. Tell you what heâs feeling, how he feels, how he sees you. A beautiful woman rightfully his. And in no means was Seonghwa an insolent man, albeit a little sinister when he needs to be, but he respects you. He seeâs you fit to share his position and heâd have it no other way with you sleeping at his bedside.
He fucking deserves it.
He wakes up and brushes his finger softly against the bone of your cheek before getting up to leave not even 4 hours later. Heâs got enough sleep and no doubt itâs because of you. He has a lot of things to do before he gets to marry you the day after today.
âGood morning, hot stuff.â San flirtatiously licks at his lips, finger pushing his glass frames when he catches Seonghwa strut through the door. âArenât you a sight for sore eyes.â
âIâm an engaged man, San.â The elder pairs with an eye roll.
âBoohoo, cry me a fucking river.â Still annoyed at most, San slips him a plate of food at 4 oâclock in the morning. âAnd whatâs our lucky future bride-to-be doing?â
The always furrowed Seonghwa smiles at the mention of you. âSleeping. What else is there to do?â
âMhm. Yet here you are bright and early ready to do what again? Hyung, you just got back from overseas. Iâm sure Yunho and I can handle y/nâs endeavors for the day. After all, itâs just a dress fitting. How hard can it be?â
Seonghwa whips a glare at satanâs little assistant, teeth gritting at the thought of leaving you with a bunch of imbeciles.
The hitman bellows before sulking anyway. âRemind me again why youâre marrying a woman this soon? For fucksake, Hwa, youâre 22. We havenât even tried covering Gangwonâs territory and youâre already celebrating our loss.â
Seonghwa rubs at his temples remembering what his bigger tasks at hand were. Why he was often traveling than resting as he should. He thinks a woman can fix his mental issues, his stresses. He may be wrong but for what itâs worth, trying to beat out another gang of territory can be exhausting. Remembering that you slept in his bed, under his roof, with his name? Is rest assured enough. He doesnât need much more than that.
âHongjoong has a lot to offer.â Seonghwa reminds San of why he may lose in the first place. âGetting Gangwon under my power is not an easy thing for me to do, San. I have to go through many lengths to get it. And Hongjoong gets too many privelages as the cityâs big man.â
âAnd by privelages you mean the presidentâs fucking cock of a son. That spoiled littleââ
âYeosang may be spoiled but heâs still wrapped around Jonghoâs finger; Jongho still working for me.â He recalls having the upper hand and even if San must remind him of reality, he must remind San whoâs stronger. âMy main concern as of right now still stands by the woman wearing my engagement ring. And if Hongjoong got to her first I might as well have lost Gangwon all together.â
San feels defeated at the statement. Both indefinitely and so. He just wants Seonghwa to be happy. Most of the time, the things he does.. he works for Seonghwa for that reason. When San was looking for a way out, southsideâs own prodigy gave him the little hope he needed. Hongjoong was a pawn in this game he was willing to toss out. San didnât like enemies. He didnât like losing. And he sure as hell didnât like new roles, new things.
Not that he didnât like you. He just didnât like the reason why you were here.
âSo you marry her. Yeah sure.â The younger of the duo shakes in pure distaste. âYou marry the poor girl and that makes it easier for you or easier for the situation you have?â
Seonghwa knows of Sanâs concerns and he hears them loud and clear. âY/n serves an important purpose in my success. Iâm as greedy and heartless as they come but sometimes I still am a human being, San. Though I prosper at evils, I deserve some type of compensation. I deserve her.â
âTalk to Yunho about that and weâll see if you still feel the same.â
Seonghwa leaves San that morning to ease the tension between them. He knows sharing a house with a man who cares for him too much and a woman who doesnât is going to start domestic problems. He was still adjusting to the new set up and so was San. The black haired devil may be a little conniving but San will come around to you eventually. He just needs time.
The way you do with Seonghwa.
Speaking of time, it moves and youâve dress fit and meet the new people of your life with not much response. In fact, you assumed that the fitting would draw you closer to amends with your circumstances. Unfortunately you fell short of that. You felt a little left out and you also felt uncertain with your place as Seonghwaâs new wife.
You were dying to meet your future husband personally. And you can tell, though you fond Sanâs company, he may not exactly be fond of you. In terms of: living with him and marrying his best friend at least. You give him some credit though since youâre normally a patient woman. Yunho on the other hand seemed quiet and never outspoken. Jongho too. You wonder if time will give them some respects towards you and you hope they donât make your life a living hell. Itâs already pretty bad and you donât want it to be worse.
You wait in Seonghwaâs bedroom, the hands of the clock being the only side to drown your thoughts. Your wedding dress hangs mockingly over the closet door and you blink with every second that passes. You even count to make time go faster. Sanâs doing something with Yunho downstairs in the basement and Jonghoâs somewhere making noise in the kitchen. It was hard to hear if Seonghwa was home. But the eerie silence that grew in the house, that weird tension that was there when you woke up this morning. Itâs there again.
You donât know why your heart bounces at the sound of footsteps.
You want to meet him.
This was going to be your husband for fucksake.
âOh.â You only see his silhouette over the bright lights in the hall when he breaks the silence. âYouâre still awake.â
You donât say a word as he shuts the door and strips out of his suit jacket. He runs a tongue over his lips and the light in the bedroom hovers his features now. Heâs just as gorgeous as San describes. Actually you think youâve seen him before. Heâs got protruding cheekbones, prominent lips, dark eyebrows and dark eyes that scream heaven in hell. You know that face. Thatâs Park Seonghwa of course. But you know that face because youâve seen it many times before.
Your father used to owe him too much. Obviously, heâs the man your father sold you out to.
âYou arenât tired?â He questions breaking your condescending thoughts.
âHardly.â Your voice is hoarse when you finally speak after countless hours of not saying anything at all. âI wouldnât consider dress hunting to be much of a tiresome activity.â
âThe boys would argue otherwise. They tell me youâre a picky woman.â His chuckle vibrates even in your chest.
You start to realize you want to like him but you canât. Heâs just so nice. He talks like heâs known you for years. He smiles like this settlement doesnât hurt you. Like being sold and arranged to marry him isnât heart clenching. You hate him and itâs going to be hard to change that.
The adjustment period might take longer than you initially thought.
âI-Iâm y/n.â
âI know, sweetheart.â He turns to you with a soft glare and smiles. He reminds you of somebody. He reminds you of someone you used to love. âIâve known you longer than youâve known me.â
You highly doubt that.
âI met with Hongjoong today.â He tangents with pure consideration. âHe asks if youâre still mourning.â
Not really paying attention at first, you ask for him to reiterate. âWhat?â
âYour father.â
Youâre not sure how Seonghwa sees you out of this set up. Youâd think a person might be a little peeved by your immoral senses considering you put a hit out on your own father. Although, this person was someone who killed meaningless lives on a daily. Provokes the evils in people, maybe. And you indirectly ask your future husband youâve never met before to kill a man who worked for the enemy: your dad. You donât want to assume heâs egging you on but you somehow think heâs just being courteous.
âWhy would I be mourning my father when I asked someone to kill him for me?â
Seonghwaâs smile is as dark as hellâs deepest point. âSo youâre happy.â
âIâm ecstatic.â Your tongue seethes against your tightened teeth and Seonghwaâs flustered in the attraction he has for you.
He overanalyzes the way your eyes gleam and how your lips drool through someone elseâs blood shed. You were a cold hearted bitch. And damn does he live for it. He loves to see it. And he wants all of it.
Yeah, he definitely wants you.
âWell Iâm glad I had the pleasure of making your wishes come true.â
He stands up again while looking at the white dress hanging from his wall. He seems a little struck, pauses to look at it a little longer. Like at you, when he walked through his bedroom door a couple minutes ago.
You want to like him, you do. But itâs already proving itself difficult and you havenât even married him yet. His answers were to simple. His questions felt half assed and far from curious. Heâs a hard devil to trust and from your pasts, you donât like dishonesty.
âYou met with Hongjoong. Which means you went into the city today.â You urge a response from the frozen man who blatantly gazes at the dress you chose to marry him with. âAre you two still fighting for the territory up north? Where my father was initially going to be transferred to.â
Seonghwaâs back tenses at what you ask and you can see it even through his thick materialed shirt. âQuestions get you in trouble, y/n. Keep that in mind the next time you want to get brave enough to pry.â
âWe leave for the venue tomorrow at 10.â He unwraps the leather of his watch and turns off the red blinking light in the corner of the room. âI know heâs your old friend so Hongjoong has been cordially invited and with the rest of his fools. So I suggest you donât make me look bad and our partnership will start on light feet.â
âPartnership?â You scoff wanting to stand. Though you shouldnât, you definitely want to. âIs that what youâre calling this? What you forced me into?â
âAn arrangement of sorts. A partnership that leads to both our success.â He turns to you and shows you his other side. A side you have to adjust to already. âThis is no longer your choice and you either are gonna stay with me or stay without me. Iâm gonna give you the option to leave right now if you want.â
Heâs halfassing you and you donât need binoculuars to see past his bullshit. The devil in him is just begging to be let out.
âI wasnât blessed with the right to choose nor was I blessed with the right to care. If itâs me you want, itâs me youâll have. I was never happy and Iâm sure thatâs not gonna change even if I stay or go.â
His smirk deepens at your tenacity. He likes it. He likes it a lot.
âGood.â His tongue rubs across his already wet lips. âIâm glad weâve come to an agreement.â
âFucking bite me.â
You donât plan to ever say that again. Cause you sleep in the same goddamn bed with him. And letâs just say they were right when they said Seonghwa doesnât like when people answer back.
âWell isnât he nice.â You hoarsely mumble to yourself while rubbing at your swollen eyes.
Your fingers play with a note left on his sideâs pillow and you open it to read that you were set to prepare for the wedding. You bathe and change as if the house was already yours and meet with San who was prepping breakfast in the kitchen. You remind yourself in the halls to explore a little more when the timeâs given.
âGood morning.â You greet sitting by the counter, eyes chasing his rushing figure.
âYup. Sure.â He hums while sliding you a plate, all in the while fixing his suit and tie. ââThis damn shirt. I told that asshole I wasnât going to wear this shit.â
âWhat?â You chuckle before reaching over to fix his collar. âA suit?â
He absentmindedly groans while glaring at you help him. âIâm a turtle neck enthusiast. Buttons are my worst enemy and weâre clearly past formal appointments with our line of work. Since I canât, please do me the solid favor of choking your husband in his sleep.â
âDuly noted.â You pat his shirt when youâre done and fix your his disheveled hair. âSpeaking of the groom, he left this morning and didnât say a word. He left a note though saying I was to prepare for the wedding. Care to elaborate?â
San threads his fingers back through his hair, glaring his eyes at you an a casual manner. As if his eyes were meant to stare that way.
âYouâre getting married in the next 3 hours. What else is there to elaborate?â
when ateez comes back I come back lol. sorry yaâll my mind has been blank ever since I started back at work. endless hours and little time, I donât want to give you guys half assed content. Iâll be back soon I promise!
