Peter comes to the tower with a baby strapped to his chest
Tony: Who did you get pregnant.
Peter: I'm just babysitting Mr. Stark! It's MJ's niece :)
Tony: This is a strategy, isn't it? Is this how people give safe sex talks nowadays?
Peter: Her family isn't trying to scare me, they're trying to PAY me. MJ refused and so I volunteered. She likes to go on walks so I thought I'd let her visit the Avengers!
Wanda: Oh my goodness look at those chubby cheeks! I could just eat you up
Natasha: I don't think this is the safest environment for a child
Steve: Aw how precious, can I hold her?
*Wanda, Steve, and Clint cooing and playing with her tiny fingers*
Tony: This is dangerous. She's already disarmed the strongest superheroes in the world
Tony: Exactly. We need to get rid of it
Peter: Well I was only stopping by, I just thought everyone liked babies. Let's go little lady!
The Avengers all groan and whine as Peter puts her back in the carrier, gently bouncing her and talking to her sweetly as he leaves
*30 minutes later in Tony's workshop*
Tony: Did you see her little feet?
Natasha: Oh my gosh those toes, I now completely understand why the piggy went to the market
Tony: FRIDAY zoom in, zoom in. Look! Dimples!
The pair spin around, Tony quickly swiping away the footage of the baby in the tower earlier
Clint: Well well well. Big talk for a couple of Avengers with baby fever
Natasha: I'll remove any chance of you ever having any future children if you tell anyone
Clint: And that's my cue to leave. Shutting up now!