A Trait a Day

A blog expressing the feelings I am unable to share.

[atraitaday]

Dear Wife,

I could never regret a single step of my journey because every path, every turn, led me to you. That’s how I know destiny is real – because somehow, against all odds, life brought me exactly where I needed to be. Everything I have now is everything I never knew I needed. Life, with all its twists and challenges, has become a beautiful story, and I’m savoring every page of mine – especially the chapters that include you.

You taught me to love again when I didn’t think it was possible. You took my broken pieces and, with your kindness and patience, began to put them back together. You didn’t just heal me – you awakened parts of me I didn’t know existed. You showed me that I haven’t reached my peak, that there are new heights I have yet to conquer. And knowing you’re by my side, I know I’ll reach them.

Thank you for being my safe place, my inspiration, and my greatest adventure. I love the life we are building together, and I’m endlessly grateful to have you walking beside me through it all. You are my greatest blessing, and I promise to never take that for granted.

With all my love,

Darryl

[atraitaday]

[atraitaday]

Let our love echo through the Universe for Earth can not contain us

[atraitaday]

You

There isn’t an 11:11 that goes by that I don't think of you,  That I don't wish the best for you.  That I don't WISH for you to find your way to wherever that may lead.

I knew that I saw something in you.  I knew that you would be important to me. That you would give me something to change my life.  I am beyond happy for the beautiful child that WE have created.  

I know I'm hard on you, but thats just to apply pressure on us.   We have a Legend in the making.  I’ve been wrapped in your spirit since 2012 and it gave me everything i needed, I wanted or dreamed of.

I don't know if you  ever look back, but I do.  First sight of you, first kiss of you, first date, first flight, first laugh and first everything.  This is our movie, our netflix original co authored by Darryl and Sade.  Lets not just watch it but write it and guide it .

I love you till forever and more

[atraitaday]

self

Been a while since we spoke, well since I spoke to you.  The world or should I say LIFE has a way of drowning my thoughts with everything but you.  I found some time to say hi.  Keep taking care of yourself and don't lose yourself.  Your values still matter and everything might not make since today but just wait till tomorrow or until it do.

Stay true and please don't get buried to deep because when I have no one I know i can always count on you.

[atraitaday]

Its always a sad story if it starts out as I was once in love...

[atraitaday]

Im so different from others.  A routine is what scares me.  Countless years sleeping by unnoticed as if every second doesn't matter.  That scares me.  Pain doesnt.  Those the moments I need to know im moving forward.  The scar as proof of what happened.  A day never forgotten.  I enjoy the climb but I live for the dive.  The rush of getting over it. 

[atraitaday]

Its hard when you are the finger pressing the trigger to your head and the savior to your own life.

[atraitaday]

its the todays that get me.  The state of now.  This impulsive feeling that I am not alright with now.  I want more and right now I dont have it.  I need more and right now I dont have it. 

I dont want to hear its gets better.  I want to see it get better.  I want to feel happy now.

[atraitaday]

I forget that all I am is just a self proclaimed artist who lives in his words and dreams,not realizing that your kisses are sour and only leaves me with pleasure for an hour.  So I touch your body until I lose track of time and fall asleep.  I stare as you sleep because thats only time where you allow me to see you vulnerable.  The only time where I get a glimpse of your essence minus the shell you protect yourself with.

Protection from what?  From someone who is willing to give you their all?  From someone who is willing to show you their scars that they know you arent willing to kiss?

Protection from every entrance.  Im just forever circling your perimeter.  This not the journey i wanted, but its the journey i took.

[atraitaday]

I lost track of myself while hoping you will find a track that leads to me

[atraitaday]

I get it.  You see everything for how you would like to see it.  You keep bad habits in the hopes that someday you will change it.  You forgive people for what you already know that its in their nature to do.  Life is all but a facade you wish you can live.  A dream you wish you can have.  An idea you wish you can actually grasp.  In fact it is once you put reality into the equation.  Forgive but dont allow to happen again.  Try and make sure you never quit.  Say you will and make sure you do it so that you wont ever have to say you will again.  Want until you actually try to acquire.  Swallow not only what your mouth can fit but what your body can store.  

Just live for yourself and allow others who allow you to live for yourself to live with you while they live for themselves

[atraitaday]

I'm accepting a new level into my life.  The level where I and I only will control my life.  I will work at it, mend it, nurture it, demand from it, push it, want it, need it and do whatever is necessary to be there for it.  Im no longer a slave to mind nor to myself.

[atraitaday]

Love will have you doing the darnest things like looking at yourself as if you are not enough or you are at fault,when you know that you are giving it your all and still managing to give more.  Much more than you get in return.  It will have you  replaying memories thats best forgotten.  Why would my mind taunt me with these amazing memories only to leave me feeling lonely and cold once its over? 

Love is a silent killer.  Killing every hope and want you ever craved.  Where your bed seems to be a paradise that you somehow still can feel the warm print left in your sheets from your old lover.  Where your rooms seems to echo the laughter that yall once shared.  Where pleasure was once tasted but now its an endless chase through old memories trying to find that pleasure once again. 

How night torments you and you crave sleep as if it was your holy savior.  Delivering you from a mind wandering wild.  Tumbling through every kiss, every touch, every interaction with a person that you still cant figure out till this day how you lost them, as if you ever even had them to begin with.

[atraitaday]

You seem to teach me a lot. I've learned that 100 rights will never overcome 1 wrong. That every step closer we get will never equate to when your gone. That the brightest memories can become dim. That pain for some never can leave from within. That all the I love you, queen, goddess and beautiful will fall short. To a I don't give a fuck w.e, I rather be apart. From I miss you, can't wait to see you. To a day without hearing from you. You make me fight battle I rather lose to. You make me get use to feelings I shouldn't get use to. You break me apart. You put me back together but each time ill b missing an extra part. You push me to the edge and even tho I know I won't fall, I'm also not scared.

[atraitaday]

You don't have a grip on my mind, you have a grip on my heart and sometimes you squeeze to tight and never kiss it afterwards.

[atraitaday]

Let our love echo through the Universe for Earth can not contain us