「ap」 ◥ アーティスト;;

i think i'll stay here 'til i feel whole again;

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well, here’s another post after i deleted my last one. things happened, things i won’t get into, but i no longer hold the same feelings about sai or about writing that i once did. i no longer have any motivation or desire to be here. i will leave this blog up as an archive, however, because i’m horribly sentimental and emotional, and i don’t want all the work and love i poured into him over two years to go away completely. 

thank you guys for making my time here amazing and making me feel so welcome. all the love, always. you’re the best.

-bee

[atrxmentumarchive]

well, here’s another post after i deleted my last one. things happened, things i won’t get into, but i no longer hold the same feelings about sai or about writing that i once did. i no longer have any motivation or desire to be here. i will leave this blog up as an archive, however, because i’m horribly sentimental and emotional, and i don’t want all the work and love i poured into him over two years to go away completely. 

thank you guys for making my time here amazing and making me feel so welcome. all the love, always. you’re the best.

-bee

[atrxmentumarchive]

hi im bee & im obsessed with saisaku

[atrxmentumarchive]

❝no one needs to know.❞ :)c

&starters.

            — it’s a little past 4 am, and they’re a sweaty tangle in his too-small dorm room bed. sakura’s head is pillowed on his shoulder, her pink hair a vibrant streak against his skin & his pillowcase. he looks down at her, sees where her roots are coming in dark. he kisses them. 

           “why shouldn’t they?” 

           “what?” sakura’s voice comes out as a laugh, but sai can feel the line of her body against his tense up. ah. struck a nerve there, then.

          “why shouldn’t they know?” sai shifts a bit, adjusting himself until he can look into her eyes, unblinking. sakura stares right back at him. she opens her mouth, her lips still kiss-swollen, & he watches her throat work for a moment before she shuts her mouth again. it falls quiet. 

          for a moment, sai is worried. he’s still unused to relationships – even with the growing circle of friends & acquaintances konoha university offered him, this thing that’s been happening with sakura is far beyond his comprehension. he wonders if he’s overstepped something, if he’s crossed some line. he blinks. 

          ( he thinks about the way she complains when her roots comes in and she needs to dye them pink. he thinks about the way she bites her lip when she’s nervous, or angry. he thinks about the warmth of her body, pressed so close to his, and realizes: i don’t want to lose this. ) 

         then the moment passes, & sakura takes his hand, & takes a deep breath. “alright,” she says, & while her voice sounds so much smaller than sai is used to, the steel backbone he knows (& likes) is right underneath. she clears her throat. “alright.” 

        “alright.” sai smiles. 

        “you’re making me coffee before i have to go to class, though.” 

         “alright.” 

         sakura’s face flushes from her neck to the (dark) roots of her hair. “& i – i.” her throat works, again, & sai can see the frustration pass over her face at her inability to find the words she found suitable. she takes another deep breath, & sai leans over & kisses her instead. 

         ( in a way, he understands. he’s always understood. )

        “it’s alright,” he says gently, & he tangles their fingers together, still smiling. 

[wordsfailing]

random sentence starters!

[atrxmentumarchive]

elizahmilton:

here’s a list of dialogue prompts that you can request from bc i love making these and they totally help with writer’s block!! so feel free to send in a number and a muse :-) **i’ll probably continue to add on to this as time goes on btw

❝i think about it every day and every night.❞

❝i.. i can’t stay..❞

❝what did you just call me?❞ 

❝i couldn’t care less. i’m with you right now, that’s all that matters.❞ 

❝please, don’t go. don’t leave me.❞ 

❝you still love her, huh?❞ 

❝frankly, my dear, i don’t give a damn❞ 

❝i’m not ready for them to find out about us.❞ 

❝it was always you.❞ 

❝you’re a coward.❞ 

❝it certainly took them long enough.❞ 

❝you’re the best part of me.❞ 

❝stay the night. please.❞ 

❝well, well. my night just got better.❞ 

❝my life would be so boring if you weren’t in it.❞ 

❝i didn’t think love existed until i met you.❞ 

❝when were you going to tell me?❞ 

❝[name], you look tired. come to bed.❞ 

❝i want to marry you.❞ 

❝you’ll be fine, i promise.❞ 

❝please get up.❞ 

❝you know i’m/we’re here for you, right?❞ 

❝don’t look at me like that.❞ 

❝your lips are so soft. i could kiss them all day.❞ 

❝i can’t fall in love with you. i don’t want all the pain that comes with that.❞ 

❝it’s nice that your voice was the first thing i heard today.❞ 

❝aww, you’re blushing like a rose!❞ 

❝you don’t need to leave so soon.❞ 

❝i can’t believe i got the first date, let slone the first year!❞ 

❝i don’t think i can do this without you.❞ 

❝i tried to move on but nobody is you.❞ 

❝you know, [name], i’m glad we’re here together.❞ 

❝hello, i’m [name], and i’m completely available.❞ 

❝i never wanted any of this to happen to you.❞ 

❝whatever it takes, isn’t that what you said?❞ 

❝i’d give up so much to have another chance.❞ 

❝you think i wanted all this?!❞ 

❝i made mistakes.. and i can’t keep pretending they didn’t happen.❞ 

❝you made mistakes.. and you can’t keep pretending they didn’t happen.❞ [for a angstier fic] 

❝this is what life’s about.❞ 

❝i’m just saying.. please believe in something.❞ 

❝you’re going to be fine.❞ 

❝it’s easier to be by myself.❞ 

❝i made i promise and now it seems that i won’t be able to keep it.❞ 

❝they don’t hate you.❞ 

❝i’m an open book.❞ 

❝i’m not going to stop leaving marks until I’m sure that every knows you’re mine.❞ 

❝look! the is so beautiful tonight!❞ 

❝if you shut up people might actually think you’re smart.❞ 

❝you have something in your hair.. um–do you want me to get it out?❞ 

❝look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but i’m still worried about you. no one deserves to be alone.❞ 

❝you could’ve died, you know?❞ 

❝can i offer you a drink?❞ 

❝coming here was your idea.❞ 

❝chin up. there’s always next time.❞ 

❝’Fine’? Are you mad?❞ 

❝there are rules. even for one such as you.❞ 

❝there is a thin line between a martyr and a fool.❞ 

❝oh, c’mon! i came all this way.❞ 

❝shame.  i kind of liked you.❞ 

❝i still believe there is a good person in you.❞ 

❝you’re kidding right? Right?❞ 

❝i knew this day would come.. sooner or later.❞ 

❝i’ll be fine, i promise.❞ 

❝i just want to hold you.❞ 

❝you know we belong together. i knew it the first time i saw you, and you know it, too. i know you do.❞ 

❝could i sit here? all the other tables are full.❞ 

❝i came here to explain and i’m not leaving until you listening.❞ 

❝stay alive for me, please.❞ 

❝i promise.❞ 

❝you’re the best part of me.❞ 

❝are you really taking their side against mine?❞ 

❝i had to see you again.❞ 

❝help me understand.❞ 

❝look, i don’t have much time, but i wanted to tell you that i love you.❞ 

❝no one needs to know.❞

❝you people are insufferable.❞ 

❝yes, s/he is.. s/he’s perfect.❞ 

❝i don’t believe i’ve introduced myself properly. how rude of me!❞ 

❝may i ask for a name to put to a lovely face?❞ 

❝just hold me.❞ 

❝i’m with you, okay? always.❞ 

❝s/he started it!❞ 

❝i didn’t realize i needed your permission.❞ 

❝everyone i’ve loved has either died or left me and i’ll be damned if you name is added to that list.❞ 

❝how could you let this happen?!❞ 

❝i’ll be fine love.❞ 

❝stop worrying so much! i’m grown i can take care of myself!❞ 

❝if i didn’t know any better, i’d say you’re trying to seduce me.❞ 

❝i wish i never even met her/him!❞ 

❝you thought you had a choice?❞ 

❝i don’t have a choice, [name].❞ 

❝you’ll do amazing, just like always.❞ 

❝you’re ridiculously comfortable..❞ 

❝a little cuddling won’t kill you, i promise.❞ 

❝i always sleep better when you’re here with me.❞ 

❝it isn’t up for debate.❞ 

❝you’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.❞ 

❝i can’t do this anymore.. not with you..❞ 

❝i’ve had a rough day and honestly all i want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with.❞ 

[atrxmentumarchive]

(&fragrantfall.)

he looks at her like a painting;  revered  &&  appreciated,  a work of art  &&  of beauty.  even now,  in the comfort of their bed       no one to impress,  just the two of them,  together       he looks at her like she is worthy of adoration,  &&  she falls in love with him again  (  &&  again,  &&  a thousand more times besides ).  she curls her fingers around his own,  shifting close to press a kiss against his jaw,  settling in the bracket of his arms.

       ❝  i missed you, ❞  she murmurs,  with her eyes up to match sai’s steady gaze. ❝  it’s weird,  isn’t it?  you’ve only been gone a few days,  really,  but i missed you.  i’ve turned into such a sap.❞

            — ; “you’ve always been a sap,” he says mildly, but the look in her green eyes as she stares at him ( into him, through him, like only she has been able to, like somehow he’s a book & she has every chapter memorized ) is enough to make his breathing hitch, a little. 

            “i missed you too,” he says after a few more quiet moments, not looking away from her eyes. sai is not the most emotional of men, still, but he allows himself this -- this quiet intimacy, this tenderness that still can’t believe he holds in his hands. “i miss you every time.” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

(&keeneyed.)

          ❛          OH,  HEY  sai!  mm,  yes,  it  is.  actually,  it’s  the  last  one  because  ..  the  author  won’t  be publishing  anymore.          ❜  a  greeting  uttered  with  a  cheerful  wave,  he  raised  the  book  in  question  briefly  before  returning  it  to  its  pouch.  only  after  curiously  eyeing  the  items  sai  was  carrying  did  he  take  a  swift  step  forward.  ❛          DO  YOU  need  a  hand  with  some  of  that?         ❜ 

            —; “ah.” sai looks down at his arms, & shifts his packages to a more comfortable position. “i don’t...think so -- ” 

            & he abruptly rethinks that statement as a paintbrush starts to tip dangerously at the end of one of his bags. he manages to tilt it the other way, but he sighs all the same. “on second thought, yes. thank you very much.” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

(&fragrantfall.)

lazily,  she extends her arms in a contented stretch,  sliding within sai’s embrace to face him in their bed.  the sheets twist easily around them,  accustomed to such movement  ( was there ever a more obnoxiously in love couple in konoha? );  settling only when she is comfortable once more,  she slides her arms about sai’s waist,  curling him close again.

        ❝ i’m sure no one will mind an hour or so       besides,  i haven’t seen you in far too long.  is the bed not comfortable,  mr. haruno,  or was it the bedmate?❞  she’s teasing,  her lips parted in a smile as she traces the outline of his jaw with her fingers.  

            — ; he leans into her touch, turning his head slightly to brush his lips against her fingertips. sai can feel himself smiling; warmth seeps into his very bones, & he lifts his hand to twine his fingers with hers.

            “both are very comfortable,” he murmurs, only letting go of sakura’s hand to brush back some sleep-rumpled hair from her face. even like this -- barely awake, lines from the pillowcase pressed into her cheek, she’s breathtakingly beautiful, & sai smiles wider. “camping out doesn’t quite compare.” 

[sumi-no-neko]

[atrxmentumarchive]

sumi-no-neko:

谷上廣南 Tanigami Kônan（1879-1928） Peony, early 20th century

[atrxmentumarchive]

@iradori​.

          “naruto is looking for you,” sai says by way of greeting. he’s still not entirely sure how to feel around sasuke, so he doesn’t. “something about training or ramen, or both. i’m not sure, i stopped paying attention.” 

            he sits down on the bench beside sasuke, his posture stiff. “i figured i should pass the message along.” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

(&fragrantfall.)

she wakes in stilted seconds,  slipping from sleep to warm embrace;  eyes closed,  barely conscious of anything but the heat next to her,  she makes a sound like a contented cat,  shifting closer to the source.  a  YAWN  as answer,  the kunoichi lifts her head a scant inch or so from her pillow,  drowsily taking in sai’s gaze.

       ❝ mmm … i’m awake.  did naruto really start a revolution because of ramen prices,  or did i dream that? i can’t remember …❞

          sai laughs, softly, into the base of her neck. “you dreamed it. although it does sound like something he’d do, doesn’t it?” 

          he sighs, after a moment, ducking down & pillowing his head on her collarbone. he knows the day ahead is calling; the twins will be awake within the next hour or so, but all he can muster up the energy to do is to press a gentle kiss to sakura’s skin. “i...don’t think i want to get up just yet.” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

@keeneyed.

          “kakashi-sensei.” sai’s voice is subdued, but cheerful; life has been busier, lately, & he hasn’t had much time to see the rest of team 7. he shifts his supplies in his arms -- paints, bought for a present he’s planning for sakura, & smiles. 

          “how have you been?” he nods his head to the book in kakashi’s hands. “is...that a new volume?” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

@fragrantfall. 

        he’s been off on mission after mission, lately; this morning is the first in a long time that he’s woken up in his own bed, in his own home, sakura softly sleeping next to him. 

          he blinks at the ceiling for a few moments. he’s aware of the november chill in the room, but it’s warm under the covers, & when he reaches out, sakura’s skin is warm, too. he curls around her -- every time he thinks he’s used to it, that he’s settled into life as a husband & a father, it’s small moments like these that remind him of its preciousness. 

          sai yawns into sakura’s shoulder, pressing his face against her skin. “are you awake?” 

[atrxmentumarchive]

like this if you want a tiny starter!! // mutuals only!! 

[atrxmentumarchive]

skeletonsakura replied to your post:“I really need you.”

IM FIL ING CHARHGE S

[atrxmentumarchive]

“I really need you.”

&four words.

          — ; the words are sleepy, pressed soft against his shoulder. it’s still early – morning has barely begun to filter through the window, pale light slanting across the floor & bed. sakura’s arms wind warm around his waist, her chin tucked underneath his head. her hair tickles his neck where it falls against his skin. 

          sai hums, low in his throat, his arms coming up around her in return. even though autumn has brought its chill, it’s warm in their bed; his arms tighten around her, & he slips a leg through hers, tangling them both up completely. 

          ( her honesty still catches him off guard, sometimes – how easily she admits she loves him, how readily she stands by his side. ) 

          “i really need you, too,” he murmurs back, pressing a feather-soft kiss to her forehead, letting his lips linger above her seal. sakura’s skin is warm under his hands, & he revels in being able to touch, being able to love. sai feels himself smiling, & he finds her hand with his & laces their fingers together. “always.” 

[ghostling]

Four Word . Prompts

“Please, come with me.”

“You’re always number one.”

“I can’t do this.”

“I won’t let you.”

“Maybe I’m just crazy.”

“I’m not even sorry.”

“Honestly, just stop it.”

“I believe in you.”

“Don’t be an ass.”

“Who were you with?”

“Please talk to me.”

“I can’t trust you.”

“I need you, though.”

“Don’t be fucking rude.”

“Is that my shirt?”

“So, it was you.”

“I need to go.”

“Just stay with me.”

“You can trust me.”

“Alright, I love you.”

“I’m sorry, but no.”

“Will you help me?”

“You’re a terrible cook.”

“Can you shut up!?”

“You love me, right?”

“I really need you.”

“I don’t love you.”

“I’m not doing this.”

“I really need you.”

“You don’t want me.”

“Let me help you.”

“You’re such a bitch.”

“I can’t do this.”

“You think you’re funny?”

“Hey, I said stop!”

“Will you marry me?”

“Wanna go out sometime?”

“I don’t want this.”

“You always this quiet?”

“Are you fucking insane!?”

“I don’t want you.”

“I’m not wearing that.”

“Sorry, were you sleeping?”

“This was never right.”

“You look really tired.”

“I’m out of here.”

“You need to go.”