Fanfic fiasco - Oscar x Carlos
Oscar Piastri never meant to fall for Carlos Sainz. But between Landoâs constant rambling about his âbestie Carlos,â Carlosâs blinding sunshine smile, and the fact that Carlos once shared his last croissant with him⊠well, oops. Love happened.
The problem? Carlos is so sweet and oblivious he thinks Oscar just really likes sharing helmets and staring deeply into his eyes for no reason. Desperate, Oscar turns to the Rookie Cupids: Kimi, Ollie, Isack and Gabe. And so Mission CARCAR begins.
ââand then Carlos lent me his towel. Oscar. That man is like, god-tier best friend material. Do you think I should make a scrapbook? Waitâwhy are you blushing?â
â...No reason.â
(Oscar furiously scribbles âCarlos towel moment đłâ in the back of his race notebook)
Oscar never meant to fall for Carlos Sainz. But Lando wouldnât shut up about him, and then Carlos had to go and be kind and gorgeous and smile like that. Now itâs 2025, and Carlos is with Williams, being a sunshine angel with Alex Albon, and Oscar is fully, irreversibly gone.
Setting: The suspiciously high-tech, very illegal âLove HQâ trailer parked somewhere behind the media pen. A red âNO FIA ALLOWEDâ sign blinks on the door.
Oscar Piastri, F1 driver, quiet chaos, romantic at heart, nervously sits in the only chair in the center of the room. He's surrounded by four rookies and an aggressively suspicious cat named Princess, who seems to be acting as emotional support animal/judge/jury.
Kimi Antonelli (stoic, clipboard in hand):
âState your full name and intentions with Carlos Sainz.â
âUm. Oscar Piastri. AndâI... intend to love him gently?â
Oliver Bearman (typing furiously into a laptop):
âEngineering documentaries. Chess. Reading Jane Austen adaptations.â
Isack Hadjar (raising an eyebrow):
âAre you secretly 80 years old?â
Yuki Tsunoda (dramatically gasping):
âWAIT. Did you say Jane Austen?â
âYeah. My favorite scene is from Persuasion. When the captain writes that heartbreakingly soft letter because he still loves herââ
(He stops. Realizes. Everyone is staring at him.)
Kimi (blinking, slightly moved):
â...We have a nerdy romantic.â
Oliver (suddenly invested):
âA softie?? With emotional depth???â
Gabe Bortoleto (popping out from a suspicious trapdoor, wearing a cape):
âSay something flirty. We need to test the Carlos Reaction Potential.â
âI told Alex if Carlos smiled at me one more time I was going to propose with an F1-themed ring. And then I did design one from scratch. It's in my hotel room.â
âHEâS DOWN BAD. I REPEAT: DOWN. BAD.â
Isack (trying not to smile):
âYouâre really into him, huh?â
âHe called me âmateâ and touched my shoulder and I almost dropped my water bottle. I want to build him a Lego garage and tell him heâs my favourite driver every morning.â
Kimi (writing furiously on clipboard):
âNerd. Romantic. Has a spine of marshmallow. Genuinely wants to cherish Carlos.â
(He nods solemnly.)
âApproved. Mission CARCAR is officially go.â
Operation: Catch Carlos Begins
Kimi: âPush him into a lake. Heâll be grateful when you save him.â
Oliver: âWrite him poetry. But, like, subtle poetry. About tyres and muscles.â
Gabe: âChallenge him to a cooking battle. Feed him your love.â
Yuki (mouth full of chips): âGift him mochi. That wins everyone.â
Actual plan chosen:
Oscar will âaccidentallyâ crash a team event at Williams and âneed Carlosâs help.â It is a disaster. Oscar ends up holding a confused Alex Albonâs cat, spilling juice on James Vowles, and Carlos hugs him out of sympathy.
Oscar (brain static):Â Carlos smells like cinnamon and dreams.
Carlos (smiling):
âYou okay, mate? Youâre shaking.â
Oscar:
âHaha. No.â
Kimi (watching from a bush):
âHeâs so doomed.â
Oscar tries writing Carlos a love letter. Carlos finds it and thinks itâs⊠a prank? A game?
âHaha, Oscar, youâre so funny. Did Lando put you up to this?â
Oscar, internally combusting:Â THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oscar storms the Love HQ.
âHELP. HE THINKS IâM JOKING.â
Oliver:
âHe thinks youâre joking because you used a glitter pen and signed it âwith tyre smoke and respect.ââ
Isack:
âYou literally drew hearts with his name on a Venn diagram.â
Location: Paddock. Bright day. Birds chirping. Cupids scheming. Pierre being Pierre (read: shamelessly charming anyone within ten meters, specifically Fernando Alonso, again).
Esteban, dressed like he stepped out of a Dior ad and fuming like a French espresso machine, walks straight into Cupid HQ.
Esteban (hands on hips, eyes narrowed):
âIf my boyfriend gets to flirt with that ancient legend for your missionsâthen I get to flirt with someone too.â
âAre you... jealous?â
Esteban (gasping in French):
âNo! Iâm fair. Equal. Symmetrical. Romantic justice.â
Yuki (clinging to Isack like a crab):
âHeâs so jealous itâs funny.â
âOkay, who do you want to flirt with?â
â...Bold. We approve.â
Carlos is leaning casually against the wall, sipping his espresso, chatting to Alex about tyre strategy and pretending not to stare at Oscar. Meanwhile, Oscar is busy tinkering with some telemetry sheetsâglasses on, focused, adorable, utterly clueless.
Enter Esteban, perfectly groomed, mischief in his step, and with the Cupidsâ stamp of approval. His mission? Flirt. Hard. With Oscar.
Esteban (leaning casually on Oscarâs desk):
âBonjour, Oscar. I heard you like nerdy boys with devastating cheekbones and long legs.â
Oscar (blinking, confused):
âI like Carlos Sainz.â
Esteban (momentarily stunned):
Oscar (completely serious):
âDid I say that out loud?â
Meanwhile, from across the garage, Carlos is halfway through sipping his espresso and chokes.
Carlos (glaring at Oscar and Esteban):
âDoes he always talk to people like that?â
âYou mean like a functioning human? Yes.â
âNo. Like... charming. Too charming. Look at the way Esteban is smiling. I donât like it.â
Esteban (recovering fast):
âRight, well... how about we grab a smoothie sometime? I know a place in Monacoâvery private.â
Oscar (mildly horrified):
âAre you flirting with me because of Pierreâs antics or because you genuinely like smoothies?â
â...I plead the fifth.â
âIâm not allowed to flirt unless it's with Carlos Sainz. Itâs a personal rule.â
Esteban pauses. Looks up at the sky.
âI respect the hell out of that.â
Oscar shrugs and goes back to his telemetry.
âHe smiled at me yesterday when I handed him a pen. I almost passed out. Thereâs no space for other men in my heart.â
Carlos is now pacing behind the Williams garage like a man possessed.
âWho goes for smoothies? Why Monaco? What kind of flavor does Oscar like? I didnât even know he liked smoothies. Maybe I should ask him. Noâcool. I must be cool.â
âYouâre spiraling.â
âHe said âBeautifulâ when we took a walk last night.â
âOh yeah? Sounds like a moon lover.â
âHe looked at me when he said it.â
Esteban tries againâŠ.and fails
Carlos is loitering in the Williams garage like he doesnât have a schedule, trying not to look at Oscar like a lost golden retriever.
Oscar is, as always, looking devastatingly soft and focused, probably trying to organize his stickers by emotional meaning.
Esteban (sauntering up to Oscar):
âBonjour again. You look very... blue today. Like a calm ocean. A blue raspberry. I like it.â
â...Is this a reflex?â
âProbably. I have a Pavlovian response to his name. I once got a nosebleed when he said âgood jobâ in the radio.â
Esteban (completely caught off guard):
â...Wow. Youâre worse than me with Pierre.â
Esteban returns to the Cupids with a clipboard.
âOscar said heâs in love with Carlos three times. Refused smoothie offer. Blushed when I mentioned Carlosâ accent. Threatened to fight me politely if I made Carlos sad.â
âHeâs in deep. Approve.â
âWaitâyou flirted with Oscar?!â
âYou flirted with Fernando twice. This was mission-based.â
Pierre (suspiciously dramatic):
âBut Oscarâs cute. This is betrayal.â
Carlos (from behind a wall of Red Bull crates):
âWhat the hell is a Pavlovian nosebleed?!â
âCarlos. Deep breaths.â
Carlos corners Esteban likeâ
âDid Oscar say he liked me?! How much? On a scale? Did he rate me? You said blushingâwas it cute?â
âOh youâre so gone for him.â
Oscarâs room is dimly lit. A warm hoodie, messy hair, a mug of hot chocolate. The stream is titled âWarzone with the Gridâ. Players: Oscar, Lando, Alex, Charles, Max, Daniel, Checo, George⊠and, sneakily, Carlos, playing under the guest username âTanSmoothie55.â
Oscar has no idea Carlos is in the party.
âOscar, youâre getting WRECKEDââ
âI know. Itâs because Iâm distracted!â
âBy what? Me in this digital helmet?â
Stream silence. Everyone hears it.
Except Oscar. Because his brain has stopped registering what he's said aloud. He thinks heâs talking to Lando in a private Discord call, not to the entire Twitch channel + one Spaniard hiding with a sniper rifle behind a tree.
Lando (suddenly WAY TOO LOUD)
âOSCARâWHAT DID YOU JUST SAY??â
Oscar (still clueless, flopped on his desk):
âI said Iâm in love with Carlos. Okay? Iâve been in love with him since like... Bahrain. And I know heâs just nice to everyone and probably thinks Iâm boring, and he smells like cinnamon sometimes and Iâm losing my MIND.â
Carlos (through his mic, trying to unmute):
â...Did he say cinnamon?â
âHe did. He really did.â
âHE SAID HEâS IN LOVE. ON A PUBLIC STREAM. THIS IS CONTENT.â
âThis is better than The Bachelor.â
âIâm screen-recording this. For safety reasons.â
Oscar (realizing slowly... painfully):
âWait⊠wait are weâLando⊠was my mic on for everyone?â
Lando (grinning like a demon):
âYup. Twitch, Discord, Carlos included.â
[OFFLINE STATUS: Oscar Piastri]
[NEW STATUS: Ghost Mode â 3 Days Straight]
Oscar vanishes. No paddock sightings. No texts. Deletes his Twitch app. Avoids Alex (who knows everything). Literally fake coughs to skip meetings.
Carlos is devastated. He spent 48 hours replaying the recording. (Checo sent him a clean version with background music and subtitles.)
đšÂ Everyone Tries to Get Oscar Out of Hiding đš
âHeâs acting like he proposed. He just said he was in love. Baby steps!â
âItâs romantic. Iconic. His ghosting? Less so.â
âI threatened to leak his browser history if he doesnât show up.â
âCarlos made cookies. With heart shapes.â
 Meanwhile, Carlos is Sad Sainz
Carlos sits alone on a Williams tire blanket, holding Oscarâs favorite glitter sticker (âYOU'RE SPEEDY HOTâ) and sighing like a man who watched a romcom marathon with no resolution.
He even made Cookies and left them in Oscarâs sim room.
âYou donât have to say it again. I heard it. I liked it. I like you.â
Oscar Has Taken Over HQ
(AKA Oscar is in full emo lock-in mode inside the Cupidsâ Headquarters and refuses to come out, so the Cupids lure Carlos in like a raccoon into a glitter trap.)
[Scene: Cupid HQ â aka a suspiciously pink RV parked behind the Williams motorhome]
Oscar Piastri is curled up on the Cupids' couch, swaddled in a puffy blanket, eating heartbreak snacks from a tub labelled "Do Not Eat â Property of Kimi Antonelli."
He hasnât moved in three days.
âHeâs starting to smell like heartbreak and despair.â
Isack (half buried under Yuki, who refuses to let go):
âHe's not even blinking anymore. Like a sad little koala.â
âJust writing a âget well soonâ card and forging Carlosâs handwriting. Maybe itâll coax him out.â
Oscar (muffled from blanket fort):
âI can hear you. Iâm not coming out. Ever.â
Gabe (eating Oscarâs chips):
âThis is a bad look for the sport.â
đšÂ INTERVENTION TIME: Enter Checo PĂ©rez đš
Checo (wearing aviators indoors):
âIâve handled two Red Bulls and a Max Verstappen. We can handle this.â
The rookies nod. They are terrified and in awe.
âHereâs what weâll do. You want Carlos to talk to him, right?â
âThen we bait the trap. Classic honey pot.â
Step 1: Tell Carlos there's an emergency Cupids meeting about his âemotional cinnamon auraâ (he will come).
Step 2: Send Yuki to âaccidentallyâ text Carlos a voice memo of Oscar crying to the background of Taylor Swift.
Step 3: Lure Carlos into HQ. â
Checo looks unimpressed:Â âJust text him you have Oscar idiots, He will come runningâ
âI received message. âOscar is at headquarters?â Is he okay?â
[Scene: Inside Cupid HQ. Carlos is lured in. Doors lock with dramatic click.]
âOH MY GOD THEY TRAPPED YOU TOO?!â
âNo, I came for you.â
Oscar throws himself back into the blanket like a fainting Victorian widow.
Carlos (kneeling beside the couch):
âYou said you loved me, Oscar.â
âIt was a glitch. A mic malfunction. I was drunk on hot chocolate.â
Carlos (holding Oscarâs hand):
âYou said I smell like cinnamon.â
â...I stand by that part.â
âGood. Because Iâve been trying to tell you I like you back. But I didnât want to make you uncomfortable.â
âYou could never. You make me... extremely comfortable. Like a weighted blanket. But fluffy.â
[Cue soft background music. The Cupids spy through the walls like emotionally-invested raccoons.]
âTheyâre so in love. I canât.â
âIf you cry, Iâll bite you.â
[Carlos pulls Oscar into a hug. The rookies release confetti cannons. The FIA issues a noise complaint.]
Oscar looks at Carlos, still half in his blanket cocoon, and Carlos â the sweet, golden boy with cinnamon scent and emotional restraint of a damp sponge â reaches up.
âCan I kiss you now? Or do you still want to hide in your shame cave?â
âIf you donât kiss me in the next three seconds I will combust.â
[And they do. Itâs slow, warm, and slightly awkward because Carlos nearly elbows the confetti cannon, but also perfect because Oscar melts like a marshmallow in the sun.]
[Scene: Cupids HQ â hidden corner]
Checo PĂ©rez, hidden behind a large potted plant (which was definitely stolen from the Alpine motorhome), sniffles loudly. Heâs watching the kiss like itâs the season finale of his favorite novela.
âDios mĂo... the yearning... the tension... the payoff...â
âI want in. I want to join your noble institution of matchmaking. I have lived... but I have never witnessed.â
Kimi (clipping on a glittery rookie badge that says âMATCHMAKING INTERN â PĂREZâ):
âWelcome to the team, TĂo Checo.â
âI want to be there when people realise theyâre idiots in love. I want to help. I want to weep more.â
[Oscar and Carlos pull apart. Cheeks flushed. Hands clasped. Oscar still hiding half his face in the blanket.]
âYou kissed me like you meant it.â
âIâve been mentally married to you since Silverstone last year.â
â...I brought you empanadas that day.â
âThey were warm. You were warm. I fell in love and had indigestion. It was a lot.â
[Back to Checo, now making hot chocolate for everyone in the Cupids HQ]
đš AUTHORâS NOTE ALERT: YOU. YES, YOU. READ THIS OR IâLL MAKE PIERRE GASLY FLIRT WITH YOUR CRUSH đš
Yes. YES. You read that right â Checo is now an official part of the Rookie Cupid squad. He may have started as a guest star, crying like an abuela over Carlos and Oscarâs kiss, but letâs be real: that man? He gets it. Heâs soft. Heâs dramatic. He belongs.
Listen, I am not emotionally stable enough to pretend like Checo didnât deserve more after everything. He was dropped like an unlabeled grocery bag at the end of a season and I refuse to let him fade into a paragraph of history. Not on my watch. He is here. He is loved. He is a Cupid now, wearing a little pink badge with glitter around the edges that says âEmotional Support TĂo.â
But letâs shift gears. Letâs talk about me for a second. Yes. Me. The author. The exhausted soul behind this madness. You see, by day Iâm a Computer Science student â thatâs right. A weary warrior battling bugs, typos, and JavaScript mood swings. I fix one thing and five others break. I blink, and suddenly there's a semicolon uprising. I open a terminal window and pray.
But by night? I write fanfics where Pierre Gasly is under flirting surveillance, Oscar Piastri is sobbing into Cupid HQ beanbags, and Carlos Sainz is the softest oblivious romantic dumbass on the grid. I live in this double life â debug by day, destroy hearts by night.
Do you know what itâs like to spend your day making sure code compiles without error, then spend your evening making sure my ships kiss with the right amount of angst before the fluff drops? Emotional whiplash. I fix code with my logical brain, and I write pining scenes with my deranged romantic braincell that survived on nothing but Spotify playlists.
Anyway, I wrote all this because I needed you to know that I am one screen error away from quitting tech and opening a matchmaking company where Checo PĂ©rez will be my co-founder, Max Verstappen will deny heâs in love while baking heart-shaped bread for Daniel, and Oscar Piastri will cry again because Carlos Sainz said âI like your curls.â
â€ïž
Your ever-suffering author.
Powered by heartbreak, caffeine, and the fact that someone has to keep this grid emotionally healthy
FOR MORE FICS OF MINE VISIT:Â https://riavolkov.stck.me/
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