avatar but entirely incorrect

i am an aonunete shipper and an active supporter of spider | she/her

[wingo5]

I love this trend (on tik tok) lmao

[beautyofattolia]

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

More Slang Jake Sully (tries) to Bring to the Na’vi (again picture all of it in janky Na’vi):

-The first time Jake gets drunk with the clan Norm is there, and he tells Norm he’s pretty lost in the sauce. This one is utterly untranslatable but becomes one of Neytiri’s favorites for the way it rhymes. She uses it wrong on purpose all the time to drive Jake crazy. 

-Every time Lo’ak gets too eager to go somewhere (which is all the time, he’s impatient) Jake tells him to hold his pa’li. The Omaticaya are confused by this saying because the pa’li do not go anywhere without the rider, they are directed by your thoughts. 

-Jake’s translation of in the dog house is crazy. He explained the saying to Neytiri because Norm said it, not him. Norm said it because one time Jake let Spider stay overnight when Neytiri was on a trip to a neighboring clan to get a particular plant for Mo’at. Neytiri was furious, because how could he trust Spider’s mask to hold out overnight? What if it broke? She doesn’t care about the kid, obviously, but her innate mask trauma come popping out. This was something that had not occurred to Jake, and Norm said he was in the dog house. Jake told Neytiri it was like being forced to sleep in the ikran roost. Neytiri doesn’t understand this, because sleeping without ones mate is an equal punishment for both; why should she also suffer if Jake fucked up?

-Jake told Neteyam he was on thin ice one time when he kept pushing Spider. The Omaticaya were delighted with this one, it makes so much sense. There is never that much ice near them, but they know what it is, and logically, the idea of someone falling through some ice is really funny.

-Jake calls all his kids sleepy heads CONSTANTLY. This one is also very popular, it becomes almost synonymous with the word children during the morning and again at night. Calling another adult sleepy head? Endless hilarity. 

-This one was used when Jake described what Lo’ak was doing to Kiri. Pushing her buttons, obviously. There is no Na’vi word for buttons, so it’s really a Frankenstein of a saying, but there is a solid year where it’s all the Sully’s ask each other at dinner time. “Tell us, Dad, what pushed your buttons today?” “I am so glad you asked, Neteyam. Uncle Norm pushed my buttons today when he tripped me in front of your mother and she fell over laughing.” They were so informed and bonded that year it’s not even funny. 

-Norm Spellman once told an Omaticaya warrior that Jake was driving him up a tree in an attempt to translate “driving him up a wall” and that also went over with great success. It has a little bit more of a literal connotation to the Na’vi, as a person irritated someone so much they literally climbed a tree to get away from them.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Lo’ak: Hold on… I’m having one of those things. A headache with pictures.

Ao’nung: What the fuck?

Neteyam, tired: He’s having an idea.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Grace: Can I get a venti cold brew with uh, seven espresso shots?

Jake: God, just do cocaine.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Ao’nung: Would you slap your best friend in the face for ten million dollars?

Lo’ak: I’d roundhouse kick you in the face for free.

Ao’nung, tearing up: I’m your best friend?

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Jake: The next person to say weird flex but okay is going to get a kick to the shin.

Lo’ak: Preposterous boast, but alas.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Lo’ak: How have you been Neteyam?

Neteyam: Last night a spider walked across my face and I didn’t brush it away. It felt… nice to be touched.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Tsireya: I thought you two were dating.

Neteyam: What? No! Why would you think that?

Rotxo: Actually, I thought you were dating as well.

Neteyam:

Lo’ak: Raise your hand if you thought Neteyam and Ao’nung were dating.

Everyone: *raises their hands*

Neteyam:

Neteyam: Ao’nung, put your hand down.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

Y’all motherfuckers are forgetting your Jake Sully lore when you write your human aus. My man was 22 goddamn years old when he had his kids. He was a child himself basically. He was acting like it in the first movie too. Second movie Jake Sully is a traumatized 30 year old man with like 15 children, somehow, desperately trying to do everything he can to keep his family alive.

In a no war scenario? My man is another child for Neteyam and Neytiri to watch. Honestly sometimes Neytiri is also a child for Neteyam and Mo’at to watch. Girl is jumping off of trees and laughing hesterically with Jake after they almost get killed by Toruk. Strict Jake Sully is military-keeping-his-family-alive-at-all-costs Jake Sully. No war Jake Sully? Man is wrestling Lo’ak and Spider in the mud right before a nice dinner and then blaming it on them. He’s gonna kick Kiri and then point at baby Tuk and say she did it. That scene in Malcolm in the Middle when the dad pays Malcolm money to take the blame for something he did? That’s no war parent Jake Sully.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Tûk: Can I have dessert?

Jake: Did you ask your mom?

Tûk: She said no.

Jake: Then why are you asking me?

Tûk: Because she’s not the boss of you.

Jake, thinking: It’s a trap. It’s a trap.

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

metkayina kids modern!au headcanons

Ao’nung:

he/him pronouns

gay(?), potentially unlabeled

definitely captain of the swim team

he swims for a club team outside of school and does school swim team during the winter season

he’s super fast

he makes states every year for high school

he also made nationals in the 200 IM and the 100 butterfly

I see him being better at short axis strokes but specifically butterfly

very good at surfing

like Lo’ak he does well enough in school to make sure he can still do sports

mostly b’s

Ronal would also probably kick his ass if he was failing any classes

probably good at social studies/social science

like current events, government, and psychology

extremely protective of Tsireya

he doesn’t like when people mess with his sister

hates that Lo’ak and Tsireya are dating but puts up with it bc his priority is ‘reya’s happiness

starts out high school with piece of shit friends

they’re all assholes

eventually realizes that they’re all assholes and starts hanging out with Rotxo and the Sully’s

was a bully in middle school

he got his shit together in high school

loves to spend time in the ocean

always going to the beach to surf or just open water swim

being in water lets him clear his head

constantly smells like salt or chlorine

(coming from someone who swam for 13 years, you cannot escape the smell of chlorine. it follows you and you just have to accept it.)

is always eating in class bc he often has morning practice

closest with his father

got Tā Moko (the tattoos) in his senior year

chose to get his first tattoo across his shoulder and the left side of his chest

(technically because the tattoo is on his body instead of his face, it is defined as Kiri Tuhi instead of Tā Moko which is traditionally reserved for the face only.)

in public, he has the same music taste as Lo’ak (rap), but secretly loves the same kind of music as Neteyam

started dating Neteyam junior year

worships the ground Neteyam walks on

Tsireya:

she/her pronouns

although i could see her using she/they pronouns so whatever floats your boat

honestly, i'm kind of in my pansexual Tsireya era bc i feel like that fits her vibe

she for sure does cheer

i'm thinking she probably did swimming when she was younger but quit in middle school

does competitive cheer

goes to that comp that's at disney every year

probably a flyer

bodies backflips

also surfs bc her whole family does but isn't as into it as Ao'nung

she's super good at school and gets all a's

Ronal is so proud of her

prefers her elective classes and her best subjects are creative writing and sociology

she loves her older brother so much but definitely thinks he can be an idiot sometimes

(especially when he had feelings for Neteyam. oh lord she was so annoyed with him for not confessing.)

has really amazing friends

super nice to everyone

i swear, everyone she meets loves her immediately bc she's such a sweetheart

started dating Lo'ak freshman year

at first, everyone didn't really understand why she was dating the 'outcast' boy, but once they saw how well he treats her, they immediately understood

puts on lipgloss constantly

loves kpop and will force everyone around her to listen to it

thinks Tûk is the cutest kid ever

is absolutely getting into crystals and astrology bc of Kiri

Lo'ak keeps finding rose quartz in all of his hoodie pockets

(he also found three in his backpack. he knows why they're there and every time he finds one, he gives Tsireya a kiss to remind her that she doesn't need crystals for him to love her.)

very close with Ronal

only lets her family and close friends call her 'reya

(Ao'nung is the only one allowed to call her 'ray of sunshine' which was his childhood nickname for her.)

she has so much love to give

(i just love Tsireya so much.)

gets her Tā Moko before she goes to college

Rotxo:

he/they(?) pronouns

possibly he/him pronouns

definitely not straight but idk what his sexuality is

(i feel like he doesn't either which is a mood.)

has major bi wife energy

does basketball with Lo'ak

definitely did swimming as well but quit in fifth grade bc he saw the basketball team practicing at the YMCA and thought it was so cool

also surfs

lives with his grandmother for sure

i also see him as having older sisters who are 10 or more years older than him

like at least two bc he gives off the 'i'm a man who's been raised by only women' vibes

also v good at school

i'm thinking mostly a's but a few b's in his weaker subjects

people may find this surprising, but i see him being good at art

he's the best when it comes to sculpture and pottery as well as other 3D art

loves making bowls

also good at making jewelry

sweet as hell and everyone was always wondering how he was friends with Ao'nung in middle school

definitely a gentle person

good with kids

he falls in love very easily and when he does, he becomes very lovesick for that person

it was so obvious that he had a thing for Kiri to the point that even she knew

he didn't have the guts to confess until their junior year tho

close with Ao'nung and Tsireya's family bc there are no kids his age in his family

has nieces and nephews that he sees very regularly

got his Tā Moko with Ao'nung

(they're in the same grade and Kiri and Lo'ak are the grade below. just to be clear for this headcanon series.)

decided to get his tattoo over his shoulder and chest as well

(to reiterate, this would technically be considered Kiri Tuhi in the Māori tradition as Tā Moko is traditionally reserved for the face.)

Rotxo is a wonderful guy

he's just so pure

i want to give him a hug

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Ao’nung: That’s enough! No more talking about Kiri.

Rotxo: But you said I had to get it out of my system?

Ao’nung: That was before I knew you had that much in your system.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

Human Sayings Jake Sully Tries to Bring to the Na’vi Accidentally (imagine these all in Na’vi all janky as fuck):

-Jake, during a war council meeting: you win some you loose some. 

Tarsem, nodding sagely: This is very wise, Jake Suli. 

-Jake: Lo’ak will be back before eclipse, Eywa willing if the creek don’t rise. 

Neytiri: tHE CREEK IS RISING?

Jake: Wait, no–

-Jake, before Lo’ak’s iknimaya: break a leg!

Lo’ak, tearing up: wHaT?!?

Jake: wait–

-This man is constantly knocking on wood. There’s so much wood available, he lives in a tree for God’s sake. He’s like “the hunt will be blessed today, knock on wood,” or “I think it might rain later, knock on wood,” and all the Omaticaya are so confused. 

-He called Neytiri’s medicine bag a fanny pack one time. 

-During a war council meeting: Alright, let’s table this. Revisit after dinner. 

Tonowari: You want us to attack the human fleet with tables??

Jake: Ugh, no, sorry. 

-Told Neteyam not to be “such a wet blanket” one time when he told Lo’ak not to jump down to Jake from a really high waterfall when they were little. Definitely broke his nose when Lo’ak misjudged the jump and landed on him. Definitely also got in trouble with Neytiri when the kids won’t stop calling each other wet blankets for at least a month. The wetness of the blankets ratchets up based on how mad the person is. Kiri once told Lo’ak he was a sopping blanket when he stepped on Spider’s foot. 

-Told Neytiri Neteyam tripped over a branch by saying he “ate it” once and she was horrified, mostly because why would an eight year old be dumb enough eat a branch. 

-Told Mo’at he was “feeling under the weather” once when she asked how he felt. She did not question it at all, deciding if he really wanted her to know he’d tell her in real words.

-Told Ronal he and Tonowari were going to “shoot the breeze.” Ronal was disgusted with this waste of time and resources. 

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Grace: What did you bring to the table?

Jake: Well, during the avatar program, I brought a lot of enthusia . . .

Grace: No. What did you put on my desk?

Jake: Oh you mean my toad?

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

sully kids modern!au headcanons

Neteyam:

he/him pronouns

bi with a preference for men

loves listening to hozier and prolly dua lipa

eat your young is his song rn

runs track, but has done archery since he was younger with Neytiri

also did rock climbing for a bit

a rock climbing god

def has good grades, like a’s and b’s

super good at English and history

reads for fun and sometimes plays video games with Lo’ak

hates shooting games tho

will not play stuff like COD

for sure had braces and as soon as he got them off, all the girls started flirting with him

he lets them down easy

genuinely enjoys looking after Tûk

Tsireya is absolutely his best friend and they do face masks and listen to kpop together

a pretty good cook, but is better at making simple stuff from babysitting Tûk

got a septum piercing during senior year but doesn’t wear it at home bc Jake would be mad

Neytiri knows

she thinks it’s sick

Jake wants him to join ROTC but it’s the one thing he won’t do

is the only kid who consistently calls Jake sir

kind of looks up to Spider bc Spider is a year ahead of him in school

started dating Ao’nung junior year

Kiri:

she/they pronouns

pansexual(?) or unlabeled

kind of likes kpop bc of Tsireya, but like religiously listens to Sza and Mitski

doesn’t play any sports, but takes some art classes

she draws on her biology notes

takes botanical drawing classes

super good at science, particularly biology

good grades, mostly a’s and b’s

reads sometimes but prefers to hang out on her phone while Neteyam reads

is always in her sibling’s rooms

Lo’ak is always yelling at her to get out of his room

has, like, a million plants, but not a single one of them is dying

kind of a loner at school, but just hangs out with Spider and sometimes her siblings and Tsireya

Tûk used to drive her crazy, but now Kiri gets that Tûk just looks up to her

goes to visit her mom every weekend

has pierced ears but never really wears earrings

she wants a nose piercing so badly that she is considering doing it herself

she says she hates that Lo’ak sometimes calls her his twin

she secretly likes it

it makes her feel included

like she’s not adopted

is extremely aware of the fact that Rotxo likes her but refuses to make the first move

they start dating in junior year

Lo’ak:

he/him pronouns (or maybe he/they)

i feel like he might try out they/them pronouns at one point

bi with preference for women

in my bi Lo’ak era

used to do archery with Neteyam and Neytiri but kind of hated it so he stopped going

started playing basketball in middle school and is like, super good

Jake is always at his games embarrassing him by yelling at the ref

honestly pretty good at school

he just doesn’t like it that much so he doesn’t want to try

for some reason, i see him being really good at math

has mostly b’s because he has to maintain a good average to play sports

plays video games a lot but will always switch from first person shooters to something else if Neteyam wants to play

hangs out with Neteyam all the time bc Neteyam is his role model

he will never admit that Neteyam is his role model

(Neteyam knows. Lo’ak did a project in sixth grade on role models and wrote his whole essay about his older brother. Neteyam found it and keeps it in his desk.)

wants to be like Jake and gets frustrated when Jake can’t see that

they fight a lot, but when Lo’ak gets older they have a heart to heart and their relationship gets better

absolutely adores Tûk

pretends he doesn’t

100% listens to rap music in public but secretly loves kpop, particularly twice

him and Tsireya started dating their freshman year

is always showing up to school with his nails painted bc Tsireya insisted on doing them

wears mascara bc he likes having long eyelashes

Kiri pierced his ears in their bathroom in junior year

Tûk:

she/her

she’s eight so she hasn’t really thought about sexuality related stuff yet

loves her family!

always wants to hang out with Jake and Neytiri bc she thinks the adults are cool

they spoil her to no end

when the parents aren’t around, she bothers Neteyam

loves to tease Kiri about Rotxo

enjoys showing up right when Lo’ak and Tsireya are about to kiss and asks them inane questions

Tsireya thinks it’s cute

Lo’ak yells at her to go away

does swim classes on Saturday mornings and Ao’nung is her swim teacher

that’s actually how Neteyam and Ao’nung formally met

Tûk was instrumental in getting them together

also plays soccer after school three days a week

good at school, but prefers going on field trips bc she likes learning by doing stuff

begs Jake to chaperone her field trips

she is the reason that Jake and Neytiri accept Spider bc she bothered them for days to let him move in with them

genuinely the sweetest most adorable child

has an iPad and enjoys playing subway surfers and those toca boca games

she makes Lo’ak play with her bc she knows he enjoys video games and thinks that it’s a way to get him to hang out with her

(at first Lo’ak didn’t know that that was why she was doing it, but Neteyam told him and now he pretends to complain but loves the toca boca hairstyling game. he downloaded it on his phone.)

has an easy bake oven and ‘cooks’ for Jake

he pretends to eat it but feeds it to the dog

(the dog usually vomits later.)

Spider:

he/him pronouns

straight, but absolutely a very supportive ally

raised by Norm bc his mom and Norm were friends when they were younger

the sullys and Norm were neighbors for Spider’s whole life so he spent a lot of time over there

at first, Jake and Neytiri didn’t like him, but eventually warmed up to him

this was bc of the kids

obviously

moved in with the Sullys when he was 14 bc Norm was moving

pretty good grades, mostly has b’s

does rock climbing and is super good at it

used to go to the climbing gym with Neteyam but now goes by himself

when his dad retired from the military, Quaritch wanted Spider to move in with him

Spider compromised and visits Quaritch every other weekend instead

tries to balance the oldest sibling responsibilities with Neteyam

genuinely cares for the sully kids so much

lets Lo’ak vent to him about Jake

Kiri is always ranting to him about her crystals and plants and stuff and he just loves listening to her

he is a super good listener in general

takes Tûk to soccer bc she practices at an indoor field and it’s at the same place as the climbing gym

plays video games with Lo’ak all the time

was homeschooled until high school

bc of that he’s pretty good at science and technology stuff bc that’s what Norm and Max know the most about

sucks at English and history and gets tutored by Neteyam

so caring and genuine

all he wants in life is to be the best big brother and be accepted into the family

the day that he goes off to college, Neytiri hugs him and tells him that she is thankful he is her son

he cries so hard

[avatar-thewayofincorrectquotes]

Ao’nung: So.

Ao’nung: I’m in love.

Ao’nung: With Neteyam.

Ao’nung: I’m in love with Neteyam.

Rotxo:

Rotxo: Neteyam Sully?

Ao’nung: Yes?

Ao’nung: . . . thoughts?

Rotxo: And prayers.