I heard he used to be an adventurer. They say he got bored with commissions, so he snuck his way into the Knights of Favonius. Maybe it's not the fighting he likes per se, more just... having fun?
a/n.
first and foremost: love languages as a science is basically total bullshit, due to lack of evidence and – well – oversimplification of emotions and the people they are coming from.
however, the concept itself is kinda fun, admittedly. i believe it does help to some extent, but people use this concept the wrong way. we all show affinity for all 5 love languages, just some more than others. also, we all express our love differently. it's really so much more complex than people want to admit.
so, TLDR: look at the way love truly is – multifaceted. it's so much more eye-opening to look at all the complexities and how they can be expressed.
yeah, that's all i got.. anyway, i hope y'all can enjoy regardless of my tangent!
acts of service.
aventurine himself is often trying to service you in some way or another, but typically fails at it. he doesn't know how to cook, he takes his own clothes to dry cleaning, and – well... frankly, he has no idea what he's doing. he can clean and organize, at best. everything else is new grounds for him to explore. he's a little scared about messing up.
and, to boot, he almost doesn't let you return the favor other than remaining in his life and "tolerating him some more", as he'd put it. (you do so much more than just tolerate him, but if you were to speak directly about it, it would scare him away. for a little while, at least. he always finds himself back at your doorstep.)
thankfully, he's more than willing to learn. he wants to make you happy in any and every way possible. he even takes a couple cooking classes and practices when he has the time... he's doing his best.
gifts.
most think aventurine would overdo it with the gifts. and they're only partially correct. in the first steps of the relationship, it's a barrage of gifts. he's scared of losing you already, okay? he doesn't want you gone, but the shallower parts of his psyche believes that he wishes you were brave enough to leave him. (you won't. you love him, and he loves you. but he's never felt like this before. for anyone.)
slowly, he lessens the gifts as he grows more comfortable with your long-term presence in his life. he learns that he should find things more heartfelt and sincere – two very scary things to even entertain the idea of. for him, anyway. it's an agonizing process.
he grows as he learns, though. he mentally notes what you prefer and enjoy the most, using those as his targets. but he still tries to add a bit of personal flair to it. it turns out really "stupid" looking sometimes. you don't care about how "bad" it is, you love it – you love him – all the same.
physical touch.
aventurine, at first, hates the touching part of a romantic relationship. but he's also never gotten too far in any genuine, heartfelt romance, either. it was always...for business. (it wasn't for him. never him.) he prickles at the mere idea of holding hands, so it doesn't happen much for a long time. he didn't dare think of other things. (he would anyway. they were his secret daydreams during slow hours of a workday.)
deep down, though, he craves nothing more than your touch. your hugs, your hands, your lips, your heartbeat, your very life. he doesn't want anyone else to touch him. only you. you are so terribly gentle with him and respectful of his (much needed) boundaries after a life of rough hands and violations.
and touching you reminds him that you are here, you're alive, and not just an old memory.
quality time.
aventurine truly cherishes quality time, but it does come as a later revelation in the relationship. at first, he can be very cold, even outright aloof – on purpose, no less. as much as it pains you, he's still working through it. on his own. you have to regularly remind him that you're here, that you're still around for many reasons. not just because you like him more than most people – or so you say.
for him, it's much like physical touch. but, instead of his boundaries having been violated for so much of his life, he's emotionally hyper-independent. he likes to say he's "the right amount" of independent, but it's obviously so much more than ideal.
but, when he comes to open himself up to, to even trust you a little more than before (it's more than "a little". don't tell him that, though), he's all over you. he always wants to spend time with you, to keep you as close as possible. it becomes a little suffocating, but that too will ease once he's more sure of himself and his personhood.
words of affirmation.
one would think that aventurine has mastered this. but it's oh-so shallow. he tells you what he believes you want to hear. yet he couldn't be more wrong. what you truly want to hear is the honesty in his heart, even though he's not quite sure what that is for a while. it takes so much thinking and self-exploration – a dangerous combination for him, even if it's all he does at night in bed. (he wishes he was better at this.)
it ends up being you who gives him these words – honest praise, appreciation, and love. (the last one is by far the scariest, of course.) when he tries to return it, he uncharacteristically fumbles and trips over his words, which immediately makes him think he's doing it wrong – or worse – that he's somehow offending you. (his honesty is the highest form of flattery in your eyes.)
when it becomes second nature to him, he's painfully shy, but the words tumble from his lips before he can stop them. the first few times it happens, he stares at you in surprise with his mouth hanging open. well, that simply means you should kiss him to shut him up before he apologizes, right?
can someone convince my parents i shouldn't be taking CHILDREN'S DOSES of medicine, knowing full well that my body has a high medication/medicine tolerance
like people want to think any disabled person who is after money is morally suspect some way, because they're not asking for "treatments" or "accommodations" like a lot of our issues can be fixed way more easily with money. can't drive? paying for a taxi is often one of the more accessible alternatives. can't cook? you can pay more to have prepared food delivered to you. food restrictions? that food straight up costs more money. can't clean? you can pay for someone to do that. house inaccessible? having (lots) of money can help with that, you get the gist.
having money won't make us abled. it also won't stop our symptoms from being distressing, painful, or debilitating. but there's a huge gap in experience between the average poor disabled person and someone who's actually wealthy. you can buy your way out of some of the difficult situations most disabled people are left to rot in. wanting money, needing money, asking for money is pretty natural when it's such a useful tool. why get so weird about disabled people wanting money like i'm pretty sure everyone wants money anyway
