Got this text sent to me and my bf today:
So, when are the three of us going out for drinks?
Is this real life?
-B

izzy's playlists!

shark vs the universe
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
No title available
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

Janaina Medeiros
we're not kids anymore.

★
Sweet Seals For You, Always
noise dept.

#extradirty

Kiana Khansmith
macklin celebrini has autism

Love Begins
styofa doing anything

⁂
Today's Document
Cosimo Galluzzi
trying on a metaphor
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from France

seen from Malaysia

seen from Colombia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States
@b-on-boys
Got this text sent to me and my bf today:
So, when are the three of us going out for drinks?
Is this real life?
-B
Two Girls, One Date
So this just happened:
A guy I met at my friend's Christmas party last month just called a left a voice message. I hadn't really spoken to him at the party, but he asked for my number later. As I was going to check my vm I saw this text pop up from one of my best friends:
UMMMM, so a guy from the Christmas Party just Facebook messaged me asking me out.
At first I thought, no way. No. Way. Something this awesomely hilarious couldn't be happening could it? As I started listening to the voice mail all of my dreams came true.
He left a very nice message which I would have thought was sweet had I not already known HE JUST ASKED OUT MY FRIEND. I called my friend immediately to dish.
I'm really bad at handling awkward situations, so let my friend take the lead on informing him of what he'd just done. Needless to say, he got a little upset.
I feel so bad for the poor kid. There's nothing wrong with dating more than one person at a time, but when a girl knows a guy asked out her best friend within seconds of asking her there's not a great chance she's going to accept your invitation.
I now have a severe case of pena ajena, a Spanish term meaning shame experienced on behalf of another person, even though that person may not experience shame. I also can't stop laughing.
-B
How To Get Over Your Ex
I don't handle breakups well. At all. Crying, not eating, depression. Not fun. I've had 3 of what I would consider to be bad breakups and through those have learned what I've done right and wrong in helping to heal my heart. Below are tips I've learned from my experiences that I hope can help you.
Delete his phone number. You MUST cut off all communication, at least until your heart heals. Continuing to be in contact with your ex will only delay the healing process. One of the great things about cell phones is that you never have to remember anyone's number. Delete his from your phone without looking at it. If you are worried about needing to be able to reach him in the future, have a family member or friend write it down and hold onto it until they think it's okay for you to have it back.
Ask him to stop contacting you. If you think he'll continue to reach out to you after the breakup, kindly ask him not to. I've done this before, asked my ex not to text or call until the day I reached out to him first, if that ever happened. Tell them you need it. If they don't respect your wishes, block their number on your phone. You'll always be able to unblock it later.
Remove him from ALL social networking platforms. Social networking can make a breakup so much worse, I'm looking at you facebook for announcing my breakup to the world. It also makes it easy for you to still get a daily dose of your ex. I think I'd be sick if I added up all the hours I spent after a breakup obsessing over ex's profiles. Who is the girl in that photo? Who is the girl he just friended? Does his profile still say single? Why doesn't it say anything at all?! You HAVE to stop. You're wasting time on someone who doesn't want it or deserve it.
Don't get drunk. You might think drinking will help numb the pain, but for me drinking only amplifies how I'm feeling sober. If I'm happy, I get happier. If I'm sad, I get very sad. If this is what happens for you, don't drink. If you haven't removed his phone number this can lead to some very uncomfortable texts/calls that will probably make you feel worse in the morning.
Hang out with friends or family. The only time I would stop thinking about my ex was when I was having fun with people I care about. Just make sure it's sober fun. I recommend a game night.
Have a support person. For me, that's my mom. Anytime I was feeling very sad or wanted to reach out to my ex, I talked to her instead. If not your mom, get a close friend. Tell them ahead of time what you need, that you're going through a difficult time dealing with the end of your relationship and need someone to lean on for support. Don't feel bad about reaching out too much.
Don't start dating if you're not ready. This may not apply to everyone, but for me hanging out with a new guy when I'm not over an ex only makes me miss him more. I find myself pointing out how this new guy is not like my ex and why can't I be with him instead and blah blah blah. If you sleep with him without really wanting to, it can make you feel worse. I know some of my friends who like the distraction, but for me it didn't help the healing. You need to be the one to fill the hole in your heart, not some new guy.
Write how you feel. After a breakup, there will be so many things I'm sure you'll want to tell your ex. Don't. Telling him how horrible a person he is won't make you feel better and neither will telling him over and over how much you miss him and want to get back together. Write down how you feel. Even though no one else may ever hear it, getting those words out will help.
Know that it gets better. During the months after my breakups, and even up to a year in one case, I thought my world was over. I would never be as happy as I was with him. No one would ever understand me like he did. In every case, I was wrong. I look back now at each of those times and am amazed about how wrong I was and how happy I am now. It's normal to feel alone and sad and angry, but with time you'll heal. And most likely, you'll grow stronger because you'll take what you learned in that relationship and apply it to future ones.
Lastly, and most importantly, if you're depressed or having suicidal thoughts, get help immediately. There is no guy that is worth taking your life over. I've felt this. I've been there. There is so much more to life and so many better things ahead for you. I promise. I know.
If you do need help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.
1-800-273-8255
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Love ya,
-B
New Year, New Boys
Two days ago I rang in the New Year with some of my best girl friends at a party downtown. We danced the night away and I shared my first kisses of 2014 with my friends, no boy in sight.
Don't get me wrong, the room was filled with cute guys but I wasn't really feeling anyone I'd met. After midnight I started hanging out behind the DJ booth. The DJ seemed cool and nice and by the end of the night asked for my number as the crowd was being pushed out of the venue.
Around 3am, DJ started texting asking where we were headed and if I wanted to hang out. I'm trying not to start hanging out with boys after midnight as it typically means only one thing, booty call, but he said he just wanted to cuddle. Plus, his texts included some awesome bad jokes, which I am a complete sucker for.
He came over and we talked until after 6am. A little making out, a lot of cuddling, and no hanky panky. Not too shabby. In the morning though he was quick to leave. I though it was a little strange, but was so tired and hungover that I didn't care.
At 4pm I got the following text from DJ:
Hey - I wanted to say thanks you for taking care of me last night. I don't want to be a dick or lead you on, so I need to be honest with you - I ran out cuz I'm not over my ex and last night was really hard on me... Thank you for taking me in.
What surprised me was that I wasn't upset, at all, and I think that's huge for me. I used to take every rejection by a guy so personally and this was a sign that I was getting over that. Instead, I felt for him. I had gathered from the evening that he had previously been in a 3 year relationship that must have ended more recently than I thought.
Who doesn't know how terrible that can feel? Lord knows I've hung out with guys way too soon after a difficult breakup and my usual response afterward was to just stop talking to them. At least DJ was up front and honest and I got to briefly get to meet a cool, new person.
Overall, I had a great night and I'm excited about 2014's potential.
-B
Warning Sign: Expects You to Do as He Says
We've all experienced warning signs when first getting to know a guy, that feeling in your guy that somethings just not quite right. One of my warning signs is when a guy tells me to do something, which I don't agree to do and then tries to make me feel bad for not doing it.
This happened with overbearing bar boy and was the first warning sign he was someone I wanted to date.
The Situation:
It was the evening after our initial phone call, which ended around 10:30pm. It was Christmas Eve and I had mentioned I had to wake up early the next day, but he continued texting me after we hung up. I tried to be polite and respond until I fell asleep at about 1am.
The last text from him that evening, which I did not receive because I was asleep, said:" text me when you wake up." I woke around 7am and opened presents with my family, then showered and got ready to head over to my aunt's. I texted him "Good morning" on the way there. This is how the rest of that convo went:
"Oh did you just wake up? I thought you had an early morning."
"I woke up at 7 and have been with my family until now."
"You were supposed to text me when you woke up. It's okay, you can make it up to me later."
Well, I have many issues with the above situation. Let's go through them in list form, shall we:
1. Who asks someone to text them first thing when they wake up that they aren't even dating? We spoke for a few minutes in person, have texted for a few days, and now you're telling me that texting you is the first thing I should be doing when I wake up. No.
2. I didn't say I would text you when I woke up. How can you be upset that I didn't do something I never said I would do? Oh wait, my apologies, since you told me then I'm "supposed" to do it. A boy who thinks a girl is supposed to do as he says... what else could I possible want in a guy. Wait, I'm not sure what I want in a guy because I can't form thoughts on my own. Can you tell me what I want?
3. Now that I haven't done as you commanded, even though I didn't agree, you choose to make me feel guilty. Not texting immediately upon waking is such a terrible offense that I need to find some way to "make it up to you." I can't wait until you command what I do to make up for it. Please make it degrading.
I'm sorry sir, but Christmas is a time for me to be with my family, not to spend texting you. Bleh.
Rant. Over.
-B
Is this big enough for you?
So I'm making out with this guy, having a good time. It's all very polite and there are no plans for any hanky panky below the belt. After a few minutes, he picks up my hand, places it down his pants and onto his member, and asks "Is this big enough for you?" Uhhh... ex-squeeze me? Baking powder?
Here are two reasons why you should never ask a girl that question:
1. I now think one of two things about you. Either A) you think you have a large penis and are very arrogant, or B) you think you have a small penis and are insecure. Neither of these personality traits is a turn on.
2. I was not judging the size of your penis UNTIL YOU ASKED ME. Now you've got me running through all of the penises I've encountered in my life, trying to figure out how your's measures up. Something you never want to happen when you're making out with a girl is to have her thinking about other guy's junk.
As a lady I will say this (and other's might disagree), I have come across many different sizes of genitalia and never EVER have I once thought "welp, this is too small to be of any use." Some are bigger and some are smaller, but IMHO all can be equally enjoyable.
I will also say that as a member of the IBTC, I used ask guys if my boobs were too small when I was younger. I did this because I was insecure about them and thought they wouldn't be "good enough". As I became more confident and loving towards my lady lumps I realized if they weren't big enough for some dude then he shouldn't be touching them anyways. Same goes for you and your willy.
-B
How Dating Works
This is how dating works. Two people hang out with each other. After hanging out, each party determines whether or not they wuold like to hang out again. This pattern generally continues until one party decides not to continue hanging out with the other.
Therefor, when a person decides to stop hanging out this does not make them a "bitch" or mean they were "leading you on." It's dating.
Yes, it does suck when someone tells you they don't want to continue dating, especially if you like them. But the best way to respond is to say something along the lines of "I understand. It was nice meeting you."
What you should not do is continuously text her mean/sarcastic messages. This will not make her feel bad. It will only confirm her decision to stop dating you because, it turns out, you're kind of a dick.
What NOT to say to a girl on a first date
I decided to give overbearing bar boy (from previous post) a chance and go on a date with him. I mean he actually asked me on a date which, sadly, is rare among boys I've met recently.
Here are some of the highlights of our dinner conversation:
I'm the most romantic guy you'll ever meet. Am I the only one who finds when people tell you how "A, B, C, D..." they are, they usually end up being the opposite after some observation? Don't TELL me how I should feel about you. Be yourself and I'll decide.
We should visit your mom tomorrow. "We" will be doing nothing with my mother until I determine you're sane, which is still TBD.
How would you introduce me to your mom? Are you really already trying to see if I would call you my boyfriend by tomorrow? Really? I think I'll just stick to using your name for any potential introductions.
Baby, honey, sweet heart. The first date is way to soon to be throwing around the pet names, snookums.
After I responded to a question by saying "I do": I like the sound of that. Stop it.
If a guy comes on this strong without even knowing me (because yes, it is impossible to know someone after a few days of texting and a date) does he even really want me, or just someone to be his girlfriend. Right now. Like NOW.
Am I wrong here? Do other ladies like if a guy says these things on a first date? For me, it comes off creepy.
-B
What NOT to say to a girl the first time you talk to her.
Let me set the scene for you. I was at a bar with a couple of friends and noticed a really cute guy. As my friends and I were leaving, I briefly chatted with him and he asked for my number. A few days later he texted. We texted back and forth for about 3 days when we decided to take the next step and *GASP* talk on the phone. A very normal progression toward getting to know someone.
Below are some of the things that were said during the next 1 hour and 10 minutes.
I was with my friend and his 5 year old and all I thought was "I want that". Look, I eventually want kids too, but we haven't even been on a date yet and you've just caused my vagina to jump up behind my stomach.
You should come meet my parents next weekend. I think I should meet you first.
You don't seem as excited as you did during our texts. This is probably my fault as I tend to use exclamation points excessively in written communication, but now I'm feeling insecure about my inflection and tone of voice.
You're perfect.Thanks, but again you haven't actually met me for more than a minute at a bar. I'm sort of getting the feeling you say this to a lot of people.
What was that thing you just posted on Facebook? You mean the thing I literally just posted a few minutes before you called? How often are you checking my Facebook? Are you looking at it right now?
I downloaded one of your profile pics to my phone and have been showing my family. Uhhh... I didn't.
You really mean something to me. How? How on earth could I possibly mean something to you when we haven't even spent time together?
Now don't get me wrong, these are all wonderful things to say to a girl. In fact, I've complained many a time about guys not being so open about how they feel. The difference is, these are not things you should be saying before you've even met someone. Save them for after the first couple of dates, or at least one date.
To quote the great Carly Rae Jepse, "I just met you, and this is crazy..." So stop.
2013 Kiss
Ah the New Years kiss. A tradition that a quick Google tells me dates back to "the Ancient Romans who would throw a big party every New Year’s Eve called the Festival of Saturnalia where they would kiss and generally debauch one another as much as possible." Who doesn't love some good debauchery?
My first NYE kiss was in the year 2000 (in the year two thousaaaand) from my FIRST boyfriend. I was 13 and I can't remember a darn thing about it. This NYE will be my first one single in two years and the party I am going to is either all or almost all couples.
I've decided to not just go kiss a rando who may be at the party, but instead would like to wait to kiss someone in the new year when it actually means something. However, I type this sober at 9am so we'll see how the evening unfolds.
I think Jim Chapman, below, does a great job of explaining why kissing a random person at midnight isn't as fun as it may seem. Skip to 3:30
"Nothing says fresh start like touching tongues with someone who until moments ago shared only in common with you the look of desperation on their face when the clock was ticking down."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZlqIUsU4cw
-B
Boys, Boys, Boys
Welcome future friends.
This blog is about my past and present experiences with the members of the opposite sex. The good, the bad, and the WTF did that really just happen?