Summary: With Amari in good hands Melissa sets off to get Barbara back
Warnings: Pre Smut
A/N: I have decided to keep any story building around Amari/foster care out of smut heavy chapters to still allow this to be a PG-13 story. The next chapter will be ALL SMUT. So this is shorter to build up to that.
1.7k (a shortie cause pre smut)
-~-
When Melissa gets outside, she finds Jacob nursing a small burn. He tells Melissa it was from him accidentally putting his hand on the grill while talking to Gregory. When her eyes flick to Gregory, he looks more annoyed than she does. Come to find out he had reminded Jacob dozens of times to back up, but he didnât listen. Melissa whacks the back of Jacob's head, barely grazing him, but he instantly complains about it. Melissa just growls in response.
Jacob moans for the rest of the evening that her violence was completely unnecessary. Melissa wants to scream at him that she was in the middle of the best kiss of her life that got ruined because of him. To her violence was completely necessary. She keeps her mouth shut and sends him a glaring look. A look that only builds when she realizes that Barbara has seemingly disappeared.
She looks in every room of the house but only notices that the older womanâs purse is now gone. There is a pit in her stomach that she canât ignore anymore. Melissa steps into the bathroom to call the older woman. It goes straight to voicemail, which makes tears prick in the corner of Melissaâs eyes.
âBarb, where did you go? We needâŠwe need to talk. Just call me back, okay. Please.â
The response from Barbara doesn't come while they eat dinner or even while she cuts the cake. Melissa tries to have fun and enjoy when Amari gets frosting on the tip of her nose, but her thoughts are absorbed in figuring out what happened to Barbara. She is halfway to kicking everyone out and bringing Amari over there when the small girl runs up to her.
âCan I go to Janine and Gregory house?â She asks, bouncing on her feet.
Melissa looks up, expecting Janine to be following, but instead is greeted by an excited Gregory.
âThere is a new exhibit at the greenhouse. It has some of the most exotic plants in existence. I think we may even be able to seeâŠâ He says, speaking so fast Melissa can barely keep up.
She holds up her hand to stop the rambling. âHow much do I need to give you for the tickets?â
âNothing, we can cover it,â Janine chimes in, but Melissa doesnât look convinced, so she adds. âWe have been saving to do fun stuff this summer. We have more than enough.â
Melissa is hesitant, not because she doesnât trust them, but because she hasnât been without Amari since the first night she came. Part of her wants to keep her at the house and just take her tomorrow. With one look at Amari, she knows that she has to let the little girl go. Amari is practically vibrating with excitement with a hopeful plea in her eyes.
âLetâs get your bag packed then, sweetheart.â She looks at Janine. âShe is gonna need a shower too. No need to wash her hair though. Barbara has a standing appointment with her in a couple of days.â
And there it is again, a nervous prick in her stomach. Is Barbara still going to want to do Amariâs hair? Is Barbara still going to talk to her? There are a million questions she needs answered. Maybe it is a good thing that Amari is going with them after all. It might give her a chance to track the other woman down.
She packs Amari a pair of pajamas and a dress covered in flowers for the next day. She packs an emergency outfit in case she changes her mind and a small Stitch Amari sleeps with every night. Then finally as she goes to pull a blanket off her bed Amari stops her.
âCan I have your blankie in case I get scared?â She asks so hesitant her voice wobbles and cracks in different places.
âOf course my sweet girl, I'll be right back,â Melissa reassures her.
She wanders across the hall and folds up her fluffy Eagles blanket she keeps on the bottom of her bed for when Amari comes to sleep with her. It is a tight fit in the overnight bag but the little girl is so excited she jumps into Melissaâs arms.
Melissa kisses the top of her forehead,hugging her tightly. âAlright my sweet girl. Have fun, sleep well, and tell me all about it tomorrow okay.â
Amari nods, kissing Melissaâs cheek. âSleep well Mel. No bed bug bite.â
Melissa doesn't correct her, just nods. âNo bed bug bite.â
Melissa watches her walk off holding Gregoryâs hand and feels a patter start low in her chest again. Not exactly full blown anxiety but the kind of worry that lingers if she thinks about it too long. So she turns when they are out of sight and decides to clean the house. She puts a handful of things in the trash when she can't stand the silence anymore. She checks her phone but there is still no response from Barbara so she grabs her keys and heads for the car.
-~-
It has been hours since the kiss and Barbara has cried for almost every single moment of them. She can't believe she kissed Melissa today of all days. No explanation, no asking, just a jealousy that had turned a spark into a flame. And it was glorious.
It was everything she had dreamed of and then some. And the thought of losing that was tearing her apart. So much so that she had shoved her phone at the bottom of her laundry hamper so she couldn't hear it ring.
She is watching her favorite comfort movie on the TV curled up with a box of chocolate caramel covered bites. She keeps a stockpile for when Melissa comes over but now doesn't see the point because her friend may never talk to her again.
A knock breaks her from her misery so loud and constant she can't ignore it. She pulls open the door to find Melissa standing there looking pissed.
Melissa doesn't wait for her to speak, merely storms past her into the living room. She is changed into a tank top and sweat pants with barely any makeup on her face from her time in the pool. She looks comfy and hot as shit, which only makes Barbara more nervous.
Melissa turns to stare at Barbara after she kicks off her shoes. âYou don't get to kiss me and then just leave Barb. That isn't how this works.â
âBut IâŠ.â Barbara stutters.
âNo buts!â Melissa says moving closer to Barbara. âYou don't leave because I need you to kiss me.â Her hands tangle in Barbaraâs shirt. âI need you to kiss me and stay.â
Itâs like the floodgates open then and Barbara wraps a hand through Melissaâs hair and pulls her in. The kiss this time is desperate, like she will explode if she doesn't learn how to make Melissa moan again. Melissa is just as eager trying to meld herself as close to Barbara as she can.
Barbara finally pulls away when reality catches up to her. âWhere is ourâŠâ the anxiety catches her throat so she self corrects. âAmari.â
âOur girl,â Melissa emphasizes, âis at Janine and Gregory's for the night. Some plant show thing is tomorrow.â She moves to kiss back down Barbaraâs neck. âSo want to have a sleepover?â
âYeâŠyes,â Barbara sighs, her head lolling to the side automatically. She feels Melissaâs teeth scrape against her neck before she steps back and wraps her hand around Melissaâs. âI want to talk first.â
She pulls Melissa into the living room before she can respond. To show Melissa she isn't changing her mind she pulls the younger woman onto her lap as she sits. She keeps one hand tight around Melissa's hip and the other curls around the red headâs hand.
âI want to tell you some things I kept secret while I processed them,â She starts softly before taking a deep breath. âGer and I had a lavender marriage. It was safer and honestly we thought maybe after years it would be more. We messed around a lot when we were younger. Him with men, me with women but people started to catch on so we stopped. We decided to fully commit. But when we had our beautiful daughters nothing changed.â
She takes a minute to calm her breathing. Melissaâs thumb absentmindedly rubs the back of her palm until she talks again.
âI love Gerald, but I was never in love with him. I don't regret our marriage or our children. He is one of my best friends to this dayâŠbut we divorced because I wanted more. I wanted someone who made me laugh, who made me feel safe, who made me feel seen. I wanted you.â
Melissaâs eyes grow wide then. âMe?â
âOf course you,â Barbara says, like there isn't another choice in the world. âWe became friends and suddenlyâŠwell suddenly all the love songs were about you.â
She gulps before continuing, âBut if this is too much⊠if you can't handle all of the secrets I have kept or the life I have lived. I'll be okay.â
The last part is a lie and they both know it. Barbara would unravel if she lost Melissa now. But she has to give Melissa a choice. A choice to accept every flawed piece of her.
Barbara lets her arms go limp giving Melissa a way out but she doesn't take it. Instead Melissa's finger curls underneath her chin and forces Barbara to look up.
âYou did what you needed to be safe and get to me. I could never turn that away,â she whispers.
Melissa cups Barbaraâs cheek pulling her in for a kiss. It is soft and sweet like she knows that a million more kisses will follow this one. When she pulls away she rests her forehead on Barbara's.
âI love you,â she says softly but with such finality that it seems to fill every corner of Barbara's apartment.
âNot nearly as much as I love you,â Barbara says and for the first time in her entire life she thinks she finally knows what peace feels like.
Summary: Melissa's end-of-the-school-year celebration doesn't go exactly as she planned, but maybe it turns out better.
Warnings: Slightly jealous Barbara
A/N: Bottom has a picture of Melissa's and Amari's swimsuits
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2.2k
-~-
The ending of the school year comes quicker than Melissa expects. It always seems like time is flying now that Amari is in her life. She tries to cling to as many moments as she can, but it always feels like something is slipping through her fingers. She wouldnât exactly call it anxiety, because that would mean admitting that she has been struggling with those kinds of emotions for a long time.
So instead she throws herself into an end-of-the-year celebration where she can get Amari to open up to more of the teachers from Abbott. She wants Amari to know that no matter what happens, there is a group of people that will be there to protect her. Melissa doesnât know exactly why it is so important to her, but once the idea has become rooted in her, she canât let it go.Â
At first everything is going well. She has a big pool set up in her backyard full of floaties, a large table covered in the shade, yard games that Amari picked out at the store, and half of the food is already done except for what she is going to make fresh on the grill. None of it stops her from feeling like something is missing.Â
âYou are staring at that punch bowl like it is going to give you the secret to world peace,â Barbara says as she comes through the backyard fence and sets down a large tray of mac and cheese. âWhatâs got you upset, girlfriend?â
âJust feel like Iâm forgetting something,â Melissa mumbles, crossing her arms.
âYou are forgetting to have fun,â Barbara says, coming to rest her hands gently on the younger womanâs shoulders. âAnother year is done, and we have all summer to enjoy with our girl. This is only the beginning. Now get changed and relax a little.â
Melissa feels her face burn as she lets Barbaraâs words sink in. She was forgetting about having fun. She was so worried about what might happen to Amari, if she was going to be able to make enough money during the summer, or if she was doing enough that she forgot to have fun. She thanks Barb for the reminder and wanders back into the house.Â
Amariâs toys still litter random corners of the house to the point that Melissa has given up on trying to clean it. Truthfully, she has come to love finding pieces of the little girl anywhere she goes.Â
âMari, where you at?â
âIn my room,â a voice calls out.Â
Melissa wanders down the hall to find the little girl staring at her dresser like she was staring at the punch bowl only moments before. The redhead leans against the doorframe. âBarb is here if you want to go out and talk to her.â
Amari shakes her head lightly and goes back to staring at her dresser. Melissa is used to weird moments like this from Amari, especially after parenting times, but it had been days since her last visit. To figure out what is going on, Melissa walks into the room, plopping down next to Amari. She carefully puts her arm around the little girlâs shoulder and kisses the top of her head.Â
âAny reason that you donât want to go out and see Barb?âÂ
Amari pauses for a moment, putting her head against Melissaâs chest. âWhat if I have to go back to my mom?â
It is then that Melissa realizes what she really has been missing.Â
Permanence.
She has been missing the chance of knowing what is going to happen to Amari. The court date was pushed back another month because other cases took precedence, but Melissa knew it was only giving Mom more time to get her shit together. She should want this. Reunification was always the goal, but a part of her wondered if that really should be the goal when it came to Amari.Â
There were so many moments when Melissa could see that these visits were chipping away at the sweet little girl who had come to her house a couple of months ago. She didnât want to lose any more parts of her. Yet every time she brought it up to Charlie, she always got the same response. Iâm trying, Melissa, but there is only so much I can do. Keep documenting, and we can make our recommendation to court next time.Â
Not being in control was not something Melissa was good at.Â
âThen you go back to your mom, and you try your best in everything that you do. You work really hard at school, you make good friends, and you keep being the sweet little girl I know you are,â Melissa says even though the words feel thick in her throat.Â
âAnd what do we do till then?â Amari whispers, pressing closer to Melissa.
Melissa gives her a soft kiss on the top of her head again. âWe keep doing the best we can, and we have some fun.â She rocks Amari side to side playfully. âSo go get a swimsuit on and letâs go get in that pool.â
Amari jumps up excitedly, digging through her drawers. She finally pulls out a blue one with cherries on it. âWill you wear this one with me?â
Melissa smiles, knowing that the same one is already pulled out on her bed waiting for her. She had picked it up, trying not to act like all she wanted to do was match with Amari. She promises Amari that she will meet her outside in a couple of moments wearing their matching swimsuits.
When her door shuts and the silence creeps in, the tightness in her chest comes back. She had told Amari what she was supposed to say. She didnât promise that things would be better with her mom. She only said that Amari could control certain things. It was the exact opposite of how she really felt, though. Melissa didnât think that Amari was going to be better with her mother and wanted her to stay exactly where she was.
As the tightness turns into a shaking of her hand and her breath shortens, she looks over at the stack of papers that have been on her nightstand for days. When Amari had started therapy, Charlie had slid in resources for Melissa to start too. There was no discussion about it or even really acknowledgement, but just a subtle hint that Charlie knew that Melissa needed something. She was finally starting to accept that maybe she did.Â
She vows to call first thing Monday morning. She already highlighted a few selections, and the acknowledgement of that eases her worries for a moment. Melissa doesnât truly calm, however, until her eyes catch on a photo of her and Barbara. Melissaâs face is obscured in her hands to cover the laughter that is bursting from her lips as Barbara attempts to bike down the street singing hymns.
Melissa had been sad a little more than usual that day. She couldnât exactly explain why she had been in such a dark place that day, but it didnât matter to Barbara. Her work wife had stepped in and immediately made it her mission to laugh as much as possible. Soon she couldnât stop smiling.Â
Melissa pushes down the desire that pools low in her stomach when she thinks about Barbara and instead pulls off the tank top she had been wearing. She tugs on the swimsuit, breathing deeply as it sticks to her curves. She feels a little more exposed than she would want to cook on the grill, so she opts for a pair of jean shorts to finish the look. There are strands of her red hair that have already started to cling to her neck just from setting up, so Melissa pulls it up into a ponytail to at least have it off her neck.Â
She stares at herself in the mirror for a moment before saying. âItâs supposed to be fun.â
-~-
When Melissa gets outside, Barbara is holding Amari against her side, unwrapping a large popsicle for her. Before Amari takes it, she leans in to give a soft kiss to Barbaraâs cheek.Â
âThank you, Barba,â Amari whispers. She still hasnât been able to get her full name right, and things come out with a little bit of a lisp, but the older woman never minds.Â
Barbara holds Amari closer. âOf course, sweet girl. Let me introduce you to the family.â
Melissa decides to grill while she watches Barbara take the little girl around on her hip. Ava loves her, immediately complimenting her on the hairstyle that Barb had chosen for her. Janine talks about all of the things she and Gregory have planned for the nights that Amari needs to be there while Melissa works. Amari was having fun until they went over to Jacob who droned on about things she didnât understand. It was Mr. Johnson who saved her by making goofy faces over his shoulder until he finally shut up.Â
Amari was all smiles when she returned to Melissaâs side. âMel, can you go in the pool with me now?â
She eyes her burgers and then beckons Gregory over. âYou know how not to burn a burger.â When Gregory nods, she thrusts the spatula into his hands. âGood. Donât burn my shit.â She turns around and grabs Amariâs hand. âLetâs see who can do a bigger cannonball.
~-~
Barbara has been staring at Melissa for way too long. She knows this, but canât pull her eyes away. There are tendrils of hair that have fallen from her bun and have plastered themselves onto her neck. Barbara wants to push them away, leaving kisses where they once lay. She wants to brush her fingers across the pink tint that has cropped up on Melissaâs shoulders even though Barbara had reminded her hundreds of times to reapply sunscreen.
She wants to do so much and has to curl her hands into fists when they start daydreaming about tracing the curve of the redheadâs swimsuit top. She exhales a large breath and turns to find Ava staring at her.
âYou and Red have been spending a lot of time together lately,â Ava comments, peering over her sunglasses.
âI am helping her with Amari. This is a big change in her life; I'm trying to be a good friend,â Barbara replied, but she can tell there is a waver in her voice.Â
âMhm,â Ava scoffs with a roll of her eyes. âAnd I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that her body is bangin in that swimsuit.â
Barbara lets out an involuntary growl. Ava laughs undeterred as she takes a step closer to the older woman.Â
âYou should make your move before someone else does,â Ava murmurs, her eyes flicking over to Melissa. âEspecially that man right over there.â
That is when Barbara realizes that one of Melissaâs neighbors has walked into the party. His eyes are glued to Melissaâs chest, barely paying attention to what the redhead is saying. Barbara feels her skin boil and storms past Ava. Her arm protectively wraps around Melissaâs waist, pulling the younger woman to her side.Â
âMelissa, you need to put more sunscreen on. You are going to burn up,â Barbara reminds her gently. When Melissa rolls her eyes, she steers her towards the house. âWe are going in the house now.â
Melissa lets herself be dragged away and into the cool a/c of her house. âJeez, Barb, I was going to come in eventually.âÂ
âYou said that thirty minutes ago,â Barbara hums, shutting the door to Melissaâs bedroom. âSunscreen now.â
Melissa rolls her eyes and sticks her tongue out. It is so cute that Barbara loses the last bit of her control. She backs Melissa up until her back is pressed against the door of the bathroom. Melissa lets out a soft puff of air as more hair falls out of her bun.Â
âBarb, what are you doing?â she whispers, her breath stuttering.Â
 The older woman lets her hands fall to Melissaâs hip, curling into the fabric that is still slightly wet from when she was in the pool. She takes a deep breath before she whispers. âDoing what I should have done years ago.â
She doesnât wait for Melissa to respond merely leans in and captures her in a kiss. It starts slow but then turns frantic as Melissa curls her hands into Barbaraâs shirt and pulls her closer. There is a kind of frenzy that makes Barbaraâs heart beat out of control. She finally works up the courage to bite down on Melissaâs bottom lip.Â
The whimper that Melissa lets out makes Barbaraâs knees shake, but then there is a pounding on the door. It is accompanied by a small voice.
âMel, Jacob tried to play with fire. I think he is hurt,â Amari calls out.
âCoglione del cazzo,â (fucking idiot) Melissa swears, pushing Barb slightly so she can move around her. âTell him to stay right where he is!â
Right before she rushes out the door, she looks back at Barbara, her cheeks burning red. She stutters for a couple of moments, then murmurs. âIâll be back.â
When the door clicks behind her, the fear kicks in. Barb feels like her skin is crawling and her breath has yet to find a regular rhythm. She canât believe what she has done and what may happen when Melissa comes back. All Barbara knows is that she doesnât want to wait to find out. So instead, she grabs her purse from the living room and runs out the front door.
A/N: There may be medical terms in this story. I would like to let everyone know that I know absolutely nothing about medicine or the terminology or anything that would happen regarding what is happening with Maya.
There are crossovers that may make no sense, but I thought they would be great in this story.
Fic Has 2190 words.
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~MEL'S POV~
A week had passed since I had asked Y/N to move in with me. We thought that it would be a good idea to inform Maya of this decision. She was so excited, and to be honest? So was I. I mean, I was a little scared, as anyone who has never lived with a child before, not to mention one with a disability, especially one like hers. But I'm looking forward to learning more about it and how to help her. I had told Y/N that I wasn't going anywhere, and I meant it.
Maya was so excited when she heard the news that she was moving homes, and she was also informed that she would have a slightly bigger room than the one she was currently in. But when she arrived at the house a few days later with some of her things, her bright smile dimmed a little when she saw the stairs.
Kneeling down to her height, I had seen the look on her face. I had decided before now to give her one of two options:
One: She could have the bedroom upstairs, or
Two: She could have had the guestroom downstairs; it was her choice.
It wouldn't make any difference which one she chose, as they were the same size.
With the bravest face I've ever seen on a 5-year-old, she said that she would like the bedroom upstairs, and she could make the trek up there even when she would be in pain.
I looked up at Y/N, who had tears in her eyes and nodded her head, letting me know that I was doing the right thing in giving Maya her own choice, as many people in the past had never taken her perspective and what she wanted into consideration before, and would just tell her what would happen. To say I was pissed when I heard that would be a massive understatement. No one should know what that feels like, especially a 5-year-old or younger child.
The days after that were relatively easy. Y/N and Maya fit so well in the house that it didn't even feel any different than before, and I love it. There were, of course, some difficult days, mostly with Maya and her disability (Congenital Vertebral Body Fusion). Some days were okay; others, she was in so much pain and discomfort that only Y/N was the one who could help her. It did make me feel bad at times because I had no idea what I was doing, and it made me just want to give up, but at the end of the day I could pull myself out of my head, and on days when I couldn't, Y/N was there to help me just like I was there to help her when it would take a toll on her. There were days when we would tag-team her, and then we would just dote on her and spoil her so much it would put a massive smile on her face.
A few months have passed since Y/N and Maya moved in, and it has been great. It was currently a Saturday afternoon, and it was just Maya and me at home as Y/N was on shift at the firehouse. She would be gone for a couple of days, but she would call whenever she could to make sure that everything was okay. It wasn't the first time that it was just at home, but it was the first time that Maya would have massive bouts of pain and muscle tension. (I couldn't even imagine how this day would turn out in the end).
Y/N had noticed a couple of days ago, after Maya and I returned from school, that Maya was showing some signs that she was going to have a pain episode soon and would show me the signs as they happened so that I could keep an eye out for them in the future.
It had begun at 5 PM. Maya had a small headache earlier that morning; it was something Y/N had told me to keep an eye on, as it could turn worse. As time went on, it got worse and turned into a migraine; her muscles had started aching all over her body, and in small moments her neck would tense up so that her head would tilt or turn without her doing so.
There unfortunately wasn't much we could do for her except for pain medication, warm baths, and muscle massages; it would help her to get more comfortable.
Unfortunately, today nothing was working for her; it was twelve hours into Y/Ns shift, and I was doing everything I could to make sure that she wouldn't worry too much. When she had called, I told her almost everything. There wasn't a lot that was showing, and I was waiting for it to get much worse than it was. She had told me that if it did get any worse, then I was to take her straight to the hospital; don't call an ambulance or anything, just get her straight there. I was also told to ask for Dr. Montgomery as soon as I arrived. While looking after Maya and making sure that she was okay, I put together a bag of what she might need for the hospital, such as her folder that has her medical notes in it that she may need, along with any toys and a change of clothes for her as well.
It wasn't even five minutes later, and I was rushing to the car with Maya and the bag in my arms, as she had made the worst noise I had ever heard her make, even when in pain, and I wasn't taking any chances anymore.
When I arrived at the hospital, I carefully grabbed Maya and the bag, and fast-walked into the Emergency Room.
"Hi, this is Maya D. Y/L/N. I've been informed by her mother to bring her here as she is having massive bouts of pain and to ask for Dr. Montgomery. " I told the Nurse at the Charge station, out of breath from all of the rushing I was doing.
"I'm Nurse Dana Evans, please let me take her... Okay, okay, at least place her down on the gurney, please. Someone page Dr. Montgomery and tell her that it's Y/Ns daughter, and that it's really bad this time." She had not only started to say but stopped herself because I was not going to just pass this little girl I've grown so fond of the past few months to someone I barely know, not to mention I was feeling kind of overprotective.
When I had placed Maya onto the gurney, she started giving out orders to the other Nurses that came over to help. She seemed to have known Y/N and Maya, and I realized that they probably had known them since Y/N was pregnant and Maya was a baby.
A few minutes later, a redheaded woman was somewhat rushing towards us with a slightly panicked look on her face.
After a few minutes of her looking Maya over and ordering some tests, she looked towards me, and before she could say anything, I quickly jumped in before she got the chance.
"She seems like she's okay and currently comfortable thanks to all of y'all, and is in good hands. I'm just gonna step out for a moment and call Y/N to let her know what is going on." I said while making sure that Maya was truly okay.
"Hi, Baby, I was just calling to fill you in on what was happening with Maya. I have had to bring her into the hospital, as she did get worse much faster than I thought it would, and she is currently with the Dr, and Nurses. I did do everything that you had suggested to make sure that it wouldn't, but that didn't work. And because she is okay and seems happy with everyone that's with her, I decided to step out and fill you in. I also have my eye on her at the moment as well." I told her once she picked up the phone call.
"Oh, God, okay, I'm on my way. Thank you for everything that you've done, Baby. I don't know what I would've done if you weren't there. I probably would be worried sick if it was someone that I wasn't comfortable with, if I'm being honest." She said, and I could hear rustling in the background letting me know that she was grabbing her things and would be on her way soon.
As I was about to tell her that she didn't need to come unless I called her again with any information about what's going on, I stopped myself when I knew that it was futile, as her mind wouldn't be on her work and would put everyone and herself in danger if they were to be called out at any time.
"Okay, Tesoro, I'll see you in a few minutes, we are currently in Bay 3. She has Nurse Dana with her currently and is being doted on by everyone that comes near her like the princess she is." I tell her when I turn back and see all of the colouring books, pencils, and a few new toys around her that I knew she didn't have when we came in.
Y/N chuckled on the other end of the phone. "Yeah, Dana has been in her life for as long as she can remember and being in hospital as much as she has they've grown close, she sees Dana like an Auntie. And Dana has seen her as family ever since." She said as I heard her jump into her truck.
"Do you want to talk to her or want me to do anythingbefore you get here?" I asked as I looked around, and I notice that the readhead was leaving the Emergency Room handing her tablet over to one of the Nurses at the desk.
"Yeah, if you don't mind putting her on the phone for me?" She asked. I told her to just give me a moment as I made my way over to Maya.
"Hi, my little Principessa, Mommy is on the way here and would like to talk to you." I said handing her the phone once I reached her. Once she has the phone I started running my fingers through her hair. Looking in another direction to give her some type of privacy without leaving her given that she is still young.
While Maya was still on the phone to Y/N, I suddenly got thirsty and realised that I hadn't made sure I had a bottle in the bag befoer we left. Looking around I see a water pitch near the bed but I don't see any cups to use, and walk over to the Nurses station after letting Maya know where I was going and what for.
Smiling when I heard her tell Y/N what I was doing I tunred towards her when I got to the station so fast I didn't realise that I almost bumped into someone. Turning around again I see that it is Dana.
"So, you're Mama? I've heard a lot about ya from that little miss over there." She said when she realised who almost knocked her over and pointing towards Maya.
"Mama?" I question witha bewildered look on my face and pointing at myself.
"Yup, bein' callin' you that for a few months now. Before that you were the scary lady that her Mommy likes, like Cinderella likes the Prince. I take it that, that's the first time you've heard this?" She asked when she took in the way I was looking at her.
I just nodded my head at her to answer the second part of the question, still speechless and bug-eyed.
"Wait, the scary lady that her Mommy likes?" I ask when the rest of that part comes into my mind that I missed.
"Yup, you were a little intimidating from what I could gather from what she would tell me at times, but as time went on you became less scary to her, and more like someone she could trust and not be scared of. I mean she calls you Mama now, maybe not to your face yet but she does call you it enough." She said and when she saw that it was worrying me a little at how she had seen me. But it did make me feel a little better knowing how she sees me now. And what she calls me behind my back makes my heart skip several beats.
"MAMA!" I heard a little voice yell and look around not knowing what Maya's voice sounds like when yelling that name that I had no idea of where it was coming from.
When I finally looked towards Maya I saw a person near her that I've never seen before and Maya looks frightened of them.
"HEY! GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY KID!" I yelled running towards Maya and this person I've never seen before.
Summary: Small snippets of parenting time with Amari.
Warnings: None
A/N: I rewrote a part of Baby I Got You for this. Think of this series as the extended version of that.
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-~-
Melissa and Amari fall into an easy routine in the days that follow court. It isnât until the first parenting time that there seems to be a shift in the little girl that Melissa has grown to know. When the parenting time is confirmed, Melissa canât exactly tell if Amari is excited or nervous.
The little girl vibrates in her seat on the way to the agency, clutching the small Stitch stuffed animal they finally settled on for the car trip. She tells Melissa everything she remembers about her mother and all the fun times they had together. It shouldnât make Melissaâs heart ache the way it does, but she attempts to smile and laugh in all the right places.Â
When they arrive, Charlie is already outside waiting for them. She comes to Melissaâs window with an envelope in her hand. Charlie hands it over to Melissa with a small explanation.Â
âI made a little sheet for you to fill out for any behaviors that you may see in Amari after parenting time. It starts from the moment she gets back in the car, probably for a day or two at most. I already sent Nakeisha over the list to make sure she keeps an eye on it during daycare.â
Melissa looks at her with a raised eyebrow. âWhat behaviors should I be looking for?â
âYouâll know it when you see it,â Charlie replies ominously before looking back at Amari. âAlright, Mari, you ready to go say hi to Ms. Becky before we see your mom?â
From the backseat, Amari shakes her head excitedly. Melissa watches the young girl disappear into the building with Charlie before letting out a breath she didnât realize that she had been holding. Something about what Charlie said didnât sit right with her. If parenting time was supposed to help build the connection between Amari and her mother, why did it seem like this sheet was going to describe the exact opposite?Â
She didnât try to dwell on it too much, opting to go to a park that was a couple of miles up the road. She didnât see the sense in going back home when she would need to be back in two hours, so she had brought a couple of things to keep her entertained. There was her grading of course, but her mind was too distracted to think about Peter Rabbit and lesson plans. Instead, she settled for a new sapphic romance novel she had been reading. She would never admit it, but she had picked it up purely because the woman on the cover reminded her of Barbara.Â
Two hours when she picked up Amari she prepared for the worst. Instead the entire time she drove home she listened to Amari talk excitedly about her mother and the things that she had been promised. It took everything in Melissa to not gently remind Amari that she didnât think Disney land next month was something that she saw happening. The red head just let the little girl dream about seeing Stitch.Â
Which was fine until two hours later when Amari had a nightmare. Melissa wasnât woken up by the little girl gently telling her that she had an accident. No this nightmare came with screams so loud that Melissa fell out of bed in fright.Â
She ran into Amariâs room to find the little girl sobbing in her bed completely soaked from an accident. It took hours to clean and calm Amari down. The little girl couldnât put into words exactly what was wrong but was terrified to have Melissa out of her sight for more than a couple of seconds at a time. So they spent the night back and forth between the laundry room washing Amariâs favorite stuffed animals until they both finally gave into exhaustion and fell asleep watching movies on the couch.Â
-~-
A week later, Melissa was behind on life when it came to parenting time. A part of her wished that the mom wouldnât confirm, so she could have uninterrupted time to do what needed to get done. Which then made her feel horrible because Amari had been talking excitedly about another chance to see her mom for days now. So she did her best not to seem annoyed when Charlie came to take Amari away for the meeting.Â
She didnât linger this time when Amari and Charlie went inside. She peels out of the parking lot and heads to the grocery store. Just as she is pulling out her list a familiar voice calls out to her. She turns to see Barbara smiling at her with her own cart already full of items.Â
âWhere is our girl?â Barbara asks when she walks closer.Â
Melissa still feels her heart flutter every time that Barbara refers to Amari as theirs. âShe is at a parenting time today.â
Barbara doesnât ask any follow up questions which Melissa is grateful for. She doesnât think that she can hide her annoyance about the whole situation in front of Barbara. Instead her work wife asks. âWell you think that you could use some company?â
Melissa smiles when she tells Barb that she would love some company. They walk through the aisle getting things off their respective lists. Occasionally the redhead will look over and see Barb adding small little treats to her cart. Melissa doesnât know what they are for until they check out and the older woman hands her two full bags.Â
âOne bag is your snacks. The other is for baby girl when she gets home.â
The simple explanation makes Melissa want to cry. She never had someone do these tiny little acts of love, and yet here Barbara was doing meaningless little errands with her but also remembering that her favorite treats are chocolate-covered salted caramel bites.Â
It turns out that this is a helpful thing to have later when Amari comes out of parenting time in a rage that Melissa has never seen before. Charlie explains that her mom was in a mood and it appears it has rubbed off on Amari as well. The entire way home Amari doesnât speak to Melissa or even look at her. Melissa tries to brush it off but she has to admit that it hurts.Â
She even tries to help lighten the mood with the snacks Barbara has offered but Amari refuses. She stomps up the porch steps and then slams the door to her bedroom. Melissa takes a deep breath to keep from screaming and then goes to hide in her own room with the container of chocolates keeping her company while she tries to cry quietly.Â
Amari doesnât crawl in her bed that night which only adds to the loneliness that Melissa feels. The following morning on her lunch break Melissa is met with a slew of text messages from Nakeisha making her aware that Amari had punched another girl. She had been put in time out but it was stressed that Melissa should talk to Amari later that evening and to tell Charlie exactly what happened.Â
The talk with Amari doesnât go as plan. Instead it ends up with Amari yelling at Melissa.Â
âYou ainât my mom! My mom told me to never let a hoe steal from me. She took my toy so I fought back.â
Melissa is so stunned she doesnât know what to say at first. She doesnât know what bothers her more: the reminder that she isnât Amariâs mother or the fact that she just heard the little girl say hoe. So instead she settles for the only thing she can think of at the moment.Â
âGo to your room.â
Itâs four simple words but they come out with a harsh bitterness and Amari visibly shrinks. She doesn't argue, just stares at Melissaâs angry face for one more second before she disappears into her room with a soft click. It instantly makes the red head feel horrible but she doesn't change her mind. Amari had been wrong to hit that little girl and this time out would give her time to think.Â
Melissa meanwhile sits in her room finishing off the last of her chocolate while she cries. It is when she gets to the bottom of the container she wonders if this is what real moms feel like when they have to punish their child. Then she remembers what Amari said and is in tears all over again for loving a child that could never be hers in the first place.
She is about to cry herself to sleep when there is a small knock on the door. She wipes her eyes before calling Amari in. The small child looks worse than she does with puffy eyes, wet collar of her shirt, and three pieces of paper in her hand.
âI'm⊠I'm sorry MâŠmâŠMelissa,â she stutters her hands shaking as she holds out the three pieces of paper. Each is a different picture Amari drew with the word sorry spelled soory. âI made one for youâŠMiss. Keisha⊠and for Opal.â
Melissa stares at the one that is clearly meant for her. Amari and her are on the cover with triangle dresses holding hands.Â
When she stares too long Amari asks, âAre you still mad?â
Melissa puts the papers on her bedside table. âNo, not anymore.â
âDid I make you cry?â Amari asks fidgeting with her pajamas.
For a moment, the redhead debates lying, but she knows her eyes are bloodshot, cheeks drenched in tears, and more than a couple of black streaks of leftover mascara dripping down her face. So she settles for a solution.
âSometimes we make people cry, but if we apologize we make it better. You apologized so I already feel better.â
Amari nods considering this then asks. âCan I have a hug?â
âOf course baby girl,â Melissa says, taking Amari tightly into her arms.Â
They hold each other for a couple of moments before Amari whispers. âI'm scared to sleep by myself.â
So Melissa lets her curl up against her side. Amari drifts to sleep holding the collar of Melissaâs shirt where a district hole has already started to appear.Â
~-~
Melissa prepares for the worst at the next parenting time but it doesnât come. The mom doesnât confirm. She doesn't even confirm the next week either. Then the third week comes, and she confirms but doesn't show, leaving poor Amari with nothing stable to hold onto.
It is the inconsistency that starts to weigh on the young mind Melissa realizes. Amari wants her mother around but can't trust her to be there. She begs for the moments they can be together but also is relieved when it doesn't happen. Itâs too many emotions for one small girl and it has to go somewhere. Most of the time that means the leftover sadness and anger gets taken out on Melissa, who takes it because Amari deserves someone who sees the rollercoaster that is childhood and stays anyway.Â
The night started with Amari on the opposite end of the couch with Princess and the Frog on the TV. Melissa doesnât see the tears but she hears when Amari begins to sniffle. The sound alone breaks something inside of her but she doesnât know what to say. Amari has grown distant and Melissa is still trying to figure out if she can get her back.Â
It is Amari who ends up talking first. She looks at Melissa with bloodshot eyes and wet cheeks. She points at Tiana and Eudora, who are hugging on screen. âWhy doesnât my Mom love me like that anymore?â
Mel stays frozen to the spot trying to figure out what to say. She could lie and say that her mom does love her but she isnât sure that is actually true. So she tells her what she knows to be true. âI donât know honâ, but I do know that I love you.â
âBut Iâm mean to you,â the young girl protests.
âWe all get a lil mean sometimes, but that doesnât mean that I donât love you or care about you,â Melissa insists.Â
âMy mom is always mean,â Amari admits in a soft broken voice. âIf she gone, who I got left, Mel?â
âYou got me and I promise I ainât gonna leave you sweetheart. No matter what,â Melissa says with such a fierce determination in her heart.Â
With those words Amari launches herself across the couch into Melissaâs waiting arms. The older woman pulls the little girl into her lap, rocking her back and forth while Amari cries out all the emotions that she canât understand. Melissa kisses her forehead and rubs her back until eventually Amari falls asleep in her arms.Â
Melissa stays on the couch until the movie ends and then attempts to carry Amari to her room. The going is slow; Melissa still isnât used to carrying a sleeping child, but she makes it eventually. She tucks her into bed, and when she tries to pull away, Amari clings to her shirt. It is like Melissa will disappear the moment that Amari lets go, so Melissa doesnât let her. She crawls into the bed next to her and holds Amari closer as if she can convince the girl even in sleep that Melissa refuses to go anywhere.Â
When she is about to fall asleep, Melissaâs phone vibrates in the back of her pocket. She pulls it out to find a text message from Charlie.Â
Mom is back, and she wants to start therapy with Amari. The therapist wants to do individual sessions with Amari first. What day works best for you?
It is a message that has so many layers of hope and disappointment all at the same time. She knows that Amari needs the therapy, and hopefully it will bring her some peace. However, she doesnât want Amariâs mother to be back. She realizes that it makes her sound horrible, but all she wants is for the little girl curled up next to her to never have to feel unloved again.
