Summary: Giyū is confronted by his feelings of jealousy, and most importantly, his feelings about you.
Warnings: Canon-typical themes of death, self-consciousness and feelings of inadequacy mentioned. There's a lot of angst, I would say, with a happy ending, a bit of fluff and suggestive themes.
Word Count: 3.5k
This is also available to read on AO3, if you prefer.
—
Through the corner of his eye, Giyū watched as Kanzaburō attempted to make himself comfortable on the windowsill. The venerable crow, using the ends of his talons, lightly scratched against the wooden ledge, once, twice, then again before tucking his legs beneath himself, nestling into his rest spot. Giyū noted the way the crow’s neck craned towards the sunlight, comfortably basking underneath it. It filled him with a small joy.
A few moments after he settled, Kanzaburō began to preen. His right wing, which was formerly tucked close to his body, was now extended as he gently nibbled it, sweeping his beak along the length of his feathers to position them back in place.
A few paces in front of the Water Pillar stood the Insect Hashira, whose attention was directed towards her wooden-framed pharmacy. Her nimble fingers faintly grazed against the edge of the shelves, making quick work to decipher which treatments were needed before she headed to the infirmary.
On their return from a routine demon-extermination mission, Isuzu, Tsuyuri Kanao’s crow, had intercepted them, informing Kochō, and by happenstance Giyū, of an injured slayer in need of her medical intervention.
Giyū turned his attention to Kochō, watching wordlessly as she grabbed a notebook that lay on her desk.
“Be sure to give my apologies to the Master, Tomioka-san. If there weren’t such a dire case here at the Butterfly Mansion, I would have surely reported the results of our mission alongside you”, she spoke softly.
Giyū closed his eyes, a form of acknowledgement to Kochō of her words.
“It’s not an issue. Do what you need to here”, Giyū replied, turning on his heels to begin his descent from her office.
Upon hearing his companion’s footsteps, Kanzaburō unhappily stood, turning to face the two pillars. “Giyū”, he wailed with discontent, “I am tired of flying”; the exhausted glint of his eyes guilting the Water Pillar.
With a quiet sigh, Giyū motioned with a light tap on his shoulder for the elderly crow to rest on him. With a pleased trill, the crow flew lazily over to Giyū, resting himself within the crux of his neck.
As she walked ahead of him, leaving the confines of her office, Kochō voiced, “Oh dear, I think Kanzaburō is the only being I’ve ever seen you spoil Tomioka-san, and he’s a crow. How puzzling.”
The insult tensed Giyū’s shoulders, and the tiniest twitch began to prickle at the centre of his brows. Despite this, he fought any inclination to defend himself; instead, he continued, walking in the opposite direction to Kochō, leaving the Butterfly Mansion to report their mission to Master Ubuyashiki.
Deliberate with his steps, Giyū strode through the rōka, giving way to the bustling Kakushi who were carrying either endless trays of food or medical supplies, all while trying to provide Giyū with a respectful greeting. With each address, the Water Pillar merely nodded before stiffly peering back behind him to let the medics know they could continue with their duties — they need not greet him.
As he finally approached the main entrance, the radiant glow of the sunlight was almost fantastical—celestial. The three delightful, hearty laughs he heard from the niwa were just as whimsical.
Directly under the pink, blooming cherry blossom tree stood Rengoku, tall and proud, holding one of the Butterfly girls, Takada Naho, up towards the branches while she giggled ecstatically. The butterfly-wing-mimic accessories in her pigtails glimmered bright green in the sun.
Besides the two, you stood, the tenderness in your eyes directed fondly towards them. Your laughter crooned pleasantly, harmonious with theirs. Your smile was bright, glowing in a way that almost rivalled the sunshine.
The scene was idyllic; a perfect encapsulation of memories one holds dear as they fight in this demon-spoiled world. Giyū wondered if that was why this view hurt him so much, the fact that this wasn’t a demon-free world, or was it something more intricate than that?
Seemingly unnoticed so far, the Water Hashira hastily tried to examine the tidal wave that had plunged over him, causing him to tighten his hands into fists when, before, they hung loosely at his side.
The surging ripples within him were tinted green in colour, a stark contrast to his usual true, calm blue. Initially, it had surprised him that the ripples began to relax at the sight of Rengoku and Naho playing together by the tree, and that they soared and crashed once his gaze focused on you. The warmth in your eyes as you watched the two submerged Giyū with an odd sensation, and that’s how he quickly surmised that he was jealous.
With a deep breath, one that had Kanzaburō shifting to secure his place on Giyū’s shoulder, Giyū looked down at the ground in silent acknowledgement.
It had all happened slowly, this emotional development.
Wistfully, he remembers meeting you at the last Hashira meeting. The Master had summoned you, amongst himself and the Hashira, to provide a report of the situation of your mission before Iguro and Kanroji had intervened, saving you and other slayers from a deathly encounter with the newly appointed, and now eviscerated, Lower Four.
In the meeting, Shinazuagwa and Iguro, as typical for them, were snide and demeaning, making a point to highlight to the Master, in front of you, how the calibre of Demon Slayers had dwindled to pathetic lows. Despite this, you had held your head high, recounting your own and others’ findings, accomplishments and errors, and Giyū could not help but find himself slowly captivated by you.
At first, he had admonished himself for being superficial. Thinking it was your appearance, though not necessarily unique, that had momentarily engrossed him. However, as you encountered each other, seemingly more and more as he was able to identify you from the hordes of dark-tinted uniforms, Giyū had accepted within himself that your kind and empathetic nature had moved him.
He remembers an assignment the Master had delegated to him through Kanzaburō. Once he had arrived, he witnessed the onslaught of Demon Slayers overwhelmed by a group of demons who had banded together, a rare occurrence, to destroy a small town on the edge of Tokyo. As the remains of the demons burned into the acrid smell of ash, Giyū recalls you comforting a young civilian boy who was unfortunate enough to get mixed in the carnage.
The boy had lost both his older brothers before the Demon Slayer’s arrival, and amidst his grief, he shared his worry of not being believed as he returned home to the remainder of his family. Demons were a horrible, hidden secret — only understood by those who had encountered them and signs of a deteriorating mind to others who did not know any better. Giyū observed you, amongst the flock of Kakushi tending to slayers and civilians alike, as you offered to support the boy home and affirm his story to his parents.
The warmth that Giyū felt in that moment, as you guided the small boy away from the scene, enveloped him like the healing waters of an onsen. It had reminded him of his own childhood; memories that he had kept away and locked in the back of his mind, and he was thankful that, unlike him, the boy had you as his support.
From then on, he slowly began to appreciate everything about you. Your strong will, your sense of justice, the way the afternoon glow caressed your skin, your smile — your beautiful smile.
In turn, your more frequent interactions have made you two more familiar with one another, so when you finally sense his gaze in your direction, you turn towards him, the smile on your face remaining; it possibly sparkled even more, but Giyū reasons that the intense brightness of the sun was affecting his sight.
“Tomioka-san!” you called, hurriedly making your way over to him, making Rengoku pause and look too in his direction, gently putting Naho down to the ground.
Although no real emotion had appeared on his face to the outsider, Giyū made an effort to compose himself as the three of you approached to greet him.
Though you had begun walking towards him first, Rengoku was quick, matching your footsteps in tandem. This synchronicity bothered Giyū, the crashing waves of jealousy engulfing him.
“Ah, Tomioka-san! How excellent it is to see you. I trust that your mission with Kochō-san went well!” Rengoku remarked, his strong sincerity evident in the smile on his face, it was almost enough to ease Giyū’s tension.
The Water Pillar said nothing in return; instead, he glanced over to you, noticing the trio of boxes you held to your side. Unperturbed by his lack of response, Rengoku followed his line of sight, his smile widening. “I see you’ve noticed our gifts. We’ve come to thank the girls at the Butterfly Mansion for their assistance in healing our wounds following our last mission. How lucky they are, as we found the best dango in the area. It’s very tasty!”
Giyū couldn’t help the cascade of negativity he felt at that. The thought of the two of you spending time together, alone, outside of your duties and obligations, likely trying out several food market locations, felt too intimate to bear.
“Would you like to —”, before you can finish your sentence, Giyū interrupts you.
“My apologies”, he started, “I am due to report back to the Master. I must go so as not to keep him waiting.”
Looking ahead, Giyū continued his walk out of the Butterfly Mansion. He had noticed the dejection in your demeanour, and he quietly reprimanded himself for being so dismissive.
—
By the time Giyū had finished at headquarters, the afternoon sun had subsided, and light no longer illuminated every corner and crevice surrounding him. Rather, the shadows of roofs, trees, and shrubbery had extended, and his environment was tinged with a burnt orange, matching the sky.
He debated going home, seeking calm and seclusion, but the rumble in his stomach prevented him from moving forward. With a sigh, he turned around, walking in the opposite direction from his estate towards the nearby town.
With it being the hour of yūshoku, the streets were swarmed with people. The few remaining merchants, who had not resigned their duties for the day, stood behind their cases of vegetables, meat, and fish, caterwauling promises of a price cut, over sounds of families and couples convening for dinner.
Through the interiors, the lanterns beamed a serene glow through the washi paper of the shoji screens. The warm aura radiated in turn the whole street as Giyū observed the way lanterns decorated the street above himself and other passers-by.
Recognising the familiar light-blue noren of his favourite place for nabemono, Giyū slowed his pace, beginning to sweep aside the linen when he heard the sounds of laughter again.
It rendered the Water Hashira completely still, and for a few moments, his face betrayed his sense of disarray. After a few attempts, Giyū willed his hand to push past the pale-blue linen.
Stowed away in the corner sat you, Rengoku and Kanroji, making sense to Giyū the slightly differing melody of the laughter; however, it remained harmonious, with yours in particular offering a honeyed sound that sent his head spinning.
Rengoku was faced away from him, directly opposite you, while Kanroji sat to the side between you. All three of your attentions were directed at the bubbling claypot set on a fire in the middle of you all. Rengoku served as the nabe-bugyō, lightly reprimanding Kanroji for her eagerness to begin eating.
“Young slayer, I, too, am excited for this meal, but we must wait until the broth has cooked the vegetables and made them flavourful!”
You chuckled to the side from Rengoku’s comment, clearly mindful of Kanroji as she pouted in disappointment.
The entire group’s deposition conveyed a sense of comfort and ease. It was as if you had found a home within each other; the conversation appeared easy, the laughter rang through, and, for Giyū, the seemingly most painful part was seeing your smile being directed once again at Rengoku.
Once he had left the quarters of Kochō’s estate, Giyū had managed to calm the violent ripples that had shifted him to the core. Despite that, the water had sadly returned, raging with immense fury, crashing so much inside him it felt as though his bones were shaking.
With a maintained veneer of neutrality, Giyū left, moving rapidly to return to his estate.
He was careful not to brush against anyone; weaving through the remaining crowds seamlessly, like the water he had trained all these years to be.
In his mind, he uttered your name, cursing you, which subsequently made him wince as though the thought was sacrilegious. In his distress, he couldn’t help himself, yet he apologised to you all the same.
Before you, Giyū admittedly hadn’t given much thought about how he came across to others. He was quiet, he knew, but that was only because he didn’t have much he wished to say. He spoke when it was important to him, when his words were needed.
Aside from Urokodaki and Kanzaburō, he made no real effort to see anyone outside of what was needed for his duties. There was no need; his responsibilities ensured that he had to be around people, his fellow Hashira, junior Demon Slayers, and civilians all the time. Yet still, he found himself wanting to be around you. The missions and accidental encounters you had no longer felt enough for him.
However, Giyū knew that he wasn’t like that, someone people craved to be around all the time, and that he couldn’t miraculously change himself into someone else.
Someone like Rengoku, whose warm embers thawed anyone who had ever met him into his circle of comrades and friends. They were opposites in both their practice as Demon Slayers and in their ways of connecting with others.
—
Although Giyū had earlier wanted to seek reprieve inside his estate, on his way home, he meandered. He had reasoned that he wanted to locate Kanzaburō, as during his meeting with the Master, the ageing crow had flown off, presumably to rest somewhere peacefully, but had not yet returned.
His reason was soon nullified as the crow had returned, circling above him in unison with another crow, which Giyū could not readily identify.
After a few coordinated circles above him, Kanzaburō made himself at home once again on Giyū’s shoulder, rubbing his beak against the dark strands of his hair.
“Home time now, Giyū! Time for rest and food”, the crow had exclaimed, and for him Giyū could not refuse. He knew, though, that as he had been away for a while on his mission with Kochō, there was likely nothing for him to eat. Still, he consolidated himself with the fact that there likely remained some seeds and nuts of which he could feed Kanzaburō.
As he approached the gateway to his estate, he noticed a lone figure standing in front of the wicket gate. From a distance, his mind pondered on who it could be, but as he drew closer, he recognised the haori that shielded the slayer from the cold night air. It was at this point that Giyū admitted that he could likely recognise it from anywhere.
Hearing his sandals tread against the ground, you turned around. At the sight of him, your eyes visibly glazed with a tenderness that almost left him breathless. Your smile, your frightfully wonderful smile, returned, and Giyū, attempting to follow your eyeline, had assumed it had been for Kanzaburō as the crow had, if he remembered correctly, garnered your attention from a past mission. The elderly crow did not fully align with your line of sight, though, which, to Giyū, could only mean that your smile was meant for him, and therefore, he couldn’t contain the small choke that left him.
“Tomioka-san”, you cheerfully, almost, sang. “I was hoping I hadn’t missed you.”
“I”, you stumbled. “I brought this for you”, and with that, you held up a carefully wrapped furoshiki that was light-blue in colour.
Giyū couldn't bring himself to do anything else but stare at the bag. What was it for? Why did you bring this to him?
Timidly, you itched the side of your cheek, trying but failing to hide your nervousness. “I really wanted to gift you some of the dango we brought earlier, but the girls were so eager, and you had to report to headquarters, so I went back to the market to get some for you, and since it was evening-time, I thought I would grab a meal too. I hope you’re hungry.”
Slowly, Giyū’s eyes shifted from the item you held in front of him to meet your own, and with that, it was as if the tidal wave within himself had finally come to rest. The waves within him that crashed and tore at his insides had turned into soothing, slow motions of water creeping up a shore. With a deceptively steady hand, he gently took the bag from you and muttered a soft-spoken gratitude.
Your eyes lingered on his face for a short while before returning his thanks with a small smile, turning on your feet to go. Before you could, Giyū’s next words gave you pause.
“It would be rude of me to enjoy this gift alone. Would you like to join me?”
Your answer only escaped you for a few moments, “Of course, Tomioka-san. I would love to.”
“Giyū”, the Water Pillar spoke with some finality. In response, you posed your query with a hum.
“I would prefer it if you would call me Giyū. You are being invited to my home after all.”
“Okay, Giyū-san.”
With that, both of you continued into his estate, setting up to enjoy your meal on his engawa, accompanied by the night’s stars and your two crows watching you from the roof.
Eyeing the rooftop, which Kanzaburō and your fellow Kasugai crow companion had made a home of, Giyū commits to memory the shape of your crow’s beak and the iridescence of its feathers.
You wish each other a good meal, but before Giyū, and subsequently you, can eat, he starts to speak again.
“Why did you do this for me?” His tone is even softer than normal, and he wonders if the reason you hadn’t missed it was that you had been incredibly keen on listening to him.
Turning slightly away from him, Giyū did not miss the way your chopsticks tightened between your fingers and how you subtly retreated within yourself.
“Because I like you, Giyū-san, and it's what you do when you like someone. When you appreciate them for who they are.”
Giyū swore that your admission had made him dizzy; his head felt submerged in a sea of water, though, this time, it delightfully overwhelmed him.
Putting his utensils down, he stood from his sitting position and made his way over to you, refamiliarising himself with your face, which remained turned away from him.
“I”, he slowly began, pausing once to swallow his nerves. “I like you too. Very much so.”
Without thinking too much, or too little, to dissuade himself from doing so, the palm of his right hand stroked the side of your face, guiding you to look at him, and right as you do, he closes the distance between you, his lips affectionately brushing your own.
When you did not pull away, Giyū felt his confidence tenfold, and he felt himself pull you closer for another kiss.
This time, it’s not simply the brush of your lips against his; he needed more than that. The top half of his lips caressed the bottom of yours. You both go for it completely, pulling away only to brush against the lips of the other before pulling each other back in again.
It's soft, it’s tender, it's everything Giyū could ever want and more.
In his fervour, his left hand rubs against your back until it's at your waist, pulling and squeezing you closer. He wants you impossibly closer, from now until always, and the sensation prompts a whimper to escape from your lips. With that, his own moan scratches at the base of his throat, before reaching the surface, vibrating against your lips as he tails after you again for another kiss.
“CAW! Food’s getting cold. Don’t waste, or Kanzaburō will eat!”
With the shock of Kanzaburō’s loud call, the two of you pull away, and Giyū makes quick work to reach past you and pull the dish that Kanzaburō was leaning towards to begin eating.
With a grumpy click of his beak, the crow flies away, although not too far as to serve as a warning.
Watching him for a brief moment, Giyū soon looks back at you, mirroring your own puzzled expression of his crow’s audacity.
Within seconds, you burst out laughing, and Giyū finds that a small smile etches itself on his face.
i got this nearly a year ago and never posted it >.< BUT LOOK!! the spit makes me crazy 😵💫 and choso is definitely about to slip his thumb into my mouth and gaze into my eyes while i suck on it <333
@newpipee sorry for taking so long to share but thank you again! hopefully i can get some more art from you in the future :3
CRAFT CLUB GIYU!!! as a crafty girl i love this!! his stitches look a little wonky but that makes me love him even more 🤭 it’s actually so cute that they put little details like this into his design
Summary: You suspect Shinobu Kocho of having feelings for your boyfriend Giyuu Tomioka, but instead of asking Giyuu for reassurance, you let your jealousy get the best of you and begin to avoid him, while he thinks back to every single thing he's ever done, trying to figure out why you're all of a sudden avoiding him.
Author's Note: This was a request I received. I hope you enjoy! I wasn't sure if you wanted a Modern AU or Kny universe, so I just went ahead and did it within the Kny universe. I hope I captured the vibe you were going for correctly.
Border by: @enchanthings
You've been dating Giyuu for 6 months now. In that time, you've grown used to his quiet nature, his rare flashes of sass, and most annoyingly of all, his frustrating density.
The relationship is good. Giyuu treats you wonderfully despite his silence; he's proven to be quite a caring boyfriend; he's not the best with words, so he'll usually show his appreciation for you with small gestures.
Not to mention you're both pillars, him being the water pillar and you the Snow pillar, so you both understand the risk that comes with your job.
Everything seems to be going great between the two of you thus far, until it wasn't.
Today, you were burdened with the task of delivering some supplies to the butterfly mansion.
You hand the crates of medicinal herbs over to Aoi. You decide to linger around the mansion for a while, wanting to enjoy the peacful afternoon sun.
You walk around for a while, only turning the corner of the west wing
Only to be met with the sight of none other than
Giyuu Tomioka himself.
He was standing on the engawa, his back to you, but he wasn't alone. You spotted Shinobu Kocho leaning against the wooden pillar, that signature smirk on her face, while saying something.
Likely one of her usual teasing remarks, she reaches her hand out her Index finger, poking the sleeve of his haori.
Giyuu doesn't move, or pull away, or offer that cold, distancing stare he usually gives everyone else; instead, he just stands there, looking down at her with his usual stoic expression.
What the hell is he even doing here???
It's such a small and stupid thing, all she's doing ispoking at his sleeve with that small familiar smile, but for some reason it sits wrong in your chest.
Like you walked into something you weren't supposed to see.
Because Giyuu doesn't usually let people touch him...Like at all
Not casually. Not without pulling away. Not without that subtle shift in his posture, that quiet wall he always puts up.
But right now
He just stands there; he doesn't tell her to stop, doesn't push her away, he doesn't say anything.
“…You’re unusually quiet today, Tomioka-san,” Shinobu hums, tilting her head slightly, her voice light but pointed. “Did something happen? Or are you just enjoying my company that much?”
You expect him to walk away. To give one of his usual blunt, dismissive responses.
Instead
He lets out a small "Maybe" and shrugs
Maybe????
You blink, almost certain you misheard him.
You don't bother to stay and hear the rest; you don't want to.
Instead, you simply leave the butterfly mansion and head home.
If he enjoyed her company so much, you figured you would give him all the space in the world to enjoy it.
You can't help the jealousy and insecurity you feel
She's so much prettier
Smarter
More graceful
You question why he's even with someone like you. when she's right there.
The following week was a blur of avoided eye contact, missed dinners together, and you avoided the water estate completely.
Whenever you'd see him try to approach you from a distance, you'd simply turn the other way.
You don't turn around to face him, so you don't catch a glimpse of the saddened and confused expression that's probably adorning his features.
At this point, you had completely isolated yourself from him.
You know the mature thing to do would be to talk to your boyfriend and clear things up, but for some reason, your pride won't allow you to do so.
Giyuu doesn't remember the last time he slept properly
It's been at least a few days maybe even a week
You've been avoiding him; that much is clear
But he is by no means a mind reader of any sort.
At first he thought it was just odd coincidences
Missed encounter here
busy schedule there
but then-
You started actively avoiding him anytime he'd attempt to approach you.
Did he say somethign wrong?
He thinks back to every conversation he's had with you, leading up to your sudden coldness with him.
Every word
Every pause
Every look
Yet nothing stands out to him; he can't for the life of him figure out what the hell he did to make you so upset.
Which only frustrates him further, because if he can't find the problem-
He can't fix it
He knows for a fact somethings wrong because it's not like you to pull away from him like this.
He sits on his engawa pondering further
Until he eventually realizes that if he wants to fix this, he's going to have to just ask you what's wrong straight up.
Which is what he's been trying to do all week
You just keep avoding him.
But...
He’s not going to lose you because he was too afraid to ask.
Even if the answer hurts.
Even if you-
Even if you don’t want him anymore.
You sit by your koi pond
Watching the afternoon sky, the hues of orange and pink make a lovely scene.
You scatter some food bits into the water and watch as your koi fish eagerly gobble the food up.
Watching them should make you feel calmer; it should stop the guilt gnawing at your stomach.
But your thoughts keep circling back to him.
His face
His eyes, oh, how you love his beautiful blue eyes.
His words
The way he'd hold you with so much love and care.
The way he'd kiss you.
Your thoughts are a tangled mess; you're not even sure why you're still avoiding him instead of having a mature conversation like adults.
You're not even sure what it is you even feel anymore
Guilt
Jealosuy
Embarassment
All mixing together in a way that clouds your thoughts completely.
A soft knock breaks the silence.
You freeze.
Your hand stills mid-motion.
Another knock follows.
Patient.
Familiar.
Your stomach drops instantly.
No
Nonononononono
You already know who it is before he even speaks.
"It's me."
You instantly recognize it as Giyuu's voice
You don’t move.
The koi continue circling beneath the surface like nothing has changed at all.
Like your world isn’t suddenly tilting again.
You stay by the pond.
Quiet.
Still.
Partially hoping that if you don't acknowledge him, he'll just go away.
A knock comes again, softer this time
"Please"
You can hear the desperation in his voice
You shut your eyes, trying to shut everything out
You can't do this right now
"I know you're in there y/n," he says after a moment.
You think for a moment
If you don't go to the door, you don't have to face him
You don't have to admit you may have acted out of line
Or admit to him the real reason that's making you feel this way.
"I just want to talk," he continues
A pause
"I'll leave if you want me to, I'd just like to know what I did to make you want to shut me out."
You can hear the sadness in his voice
"I just need to know you're ok, Y/n, please."
That does it.
Not because you’re ready.
But because you know he won’t stop worrying.
You walk over to the gate
Slowly
Hesitantly
You reach towards the knob on the door and slowly open it
The door slides open enough to reveal him
He stands there
Quiet, but you notice the expression on his face change the moment his eyes land on you.
Relief
“…You’re here,” he says softly.
Not accusing.
Not angry.
Just…glad.
And that alone makes your chest twist painfully.
You don’t open the door fully.
You don’t step out.
You just stand there, fingers still curled around the edge of it like it’s the only thing keeping you grounded.
“…What do you want?” you ask.
Your voice comes out weaker than you meant it to.
He doesn’t react to the tone.
He just looks at you.
Like he’s trying to understand where you went.
“…To talk,” he says simply.
You let out a small, shaky breath.
“About what?”
“…About why you’ve been avoiding me.”
Your grip tightens slightly.
“I’ve been busy,” you say quickly.
Too quickly.
And you know he hears it too.
Because his gaze doesn’t change, but it deepens.
“…No,” he says quietly.
That one word makes your chest tighten.
“No?” you repeat.
'It's pretty obvious you're avoiding me, Y/n," he says again. "Every time I've tried to approach you this week, you've completely avoided me."
"I haven't," you spit back
Although not even you believe that one
Everything goes silent for a moment
Then-
"Why?" he asks, his blue eyes piercing into you with so much desperation and sadness.
It's such a simple question
So direct.
It shouldn’t hurt as much as it does.
Your throat tightens.
"I just-" You stop before you can even finish your sentence.
Because what are you even supposed to say?
That you saw him with Shinobu and something inside you cracked?
That you felt small?
That you felt replaceable?
That you didn’t trust him enough to just ask?
Silence stretches throughout the yard
His eyes soften slightly as he waits for an answer.
“…Did I do something wrong?” he asks.
That hits harder.
Because he’s not angry.
He’s not defending himself.
He’s blaming himself again.
You shake your head
“…Then why?” he asks again, quieter now.
Your breath trembles.
“I saw you,” you admit finally.
A pause.
“…Where?”
“The Butterfly Mansion,” you say. “With Shinobu.”
That name lands between you like a weight.
Giyuu goes still.
“…Oh.”
Just that.
And something in you snaps at how simple it sounds.
"Oh?" you repeat your voice sharper now, "Is that really all you have to say, Tomioka?"
He flinches slightly upon hearing you refer to him by his last name.
He blinks slightly, like he doesn’t understand your reaction.
“She was touching you,” you continue, voice rising before you can stop it. “And you just stood there.”
“…She poked my sleeve,” he says quietly.
“That’s not the point!”
Your voice cracks just a little at the edges.
“You don’t let people do that, Giyuu. You don’t let anyone get that close to you, so why her?”
Silence.
The air feels heavier now.
But not hostile.
Just…careful.
Like he’s choosing his words.
“…Is that why you’ve been avoiding me?” he asks.
You flinch slightly.
“I heard what you said,” you admit, quieter now. “You said you enjoyed her company.”
“…I said ‘maybe.’”
"That's not any fucking better, Giyuu!", you snap back
He takes a deep breath, running his hand through his hair
He looks frustrated, a look you're not used to seeing on him.
"I only said that because... she wouldn't stop bugging me. I-" he continues, " I thought if I simply agreed with her, she'd stop."
“I didn’t think it would matter," he says finally
That makes your chest tighten painfully.
“Of course it matters,” you whisper. “She’s-”
You stop.
You shouldn’t say it.
But it slips out anyway.
“…She’s better than me.”
The words hang there immediately.
And you regret them instantly.
Because his expression changes.
Not in anger.
Not in confusion.
But something quieter.
Stronger.
Final.
“…No,” he says.
You blink.
“…No?”
He steps closer to the doorway.
Not forcing.
Not invading.
"Not to me," he says simply
“I don’t want Shinobu,” he continues. "I can assure you she doesn't want me either." His voice is firm but not harsh.
"But what if she-" You begin
"She doesn't," He cuts you off quickly
Then he pauses to think for a moment, "And even if she did...It wouldn't matter."
You look up at him in confusion.
Did he just say it wouldn't matter?
"Why wouldn't it?" you question.
"Because I'm with you and I love only you," he says simply
But you know he means every word.
He always does.
“I didn’t know you saw us,” he adds. “If I did, I would’ve explained.”
Your fingers tighten on the door.
“I just assumed,” you whisper. “And I didn’t want to hear it.”
“Hear what?”
Your voice breaks slightly.
“That you might like her more.”
“I don’t.”
Simple.
Certain.
No hesitation at all.
You finally look at him fully.
And he’s already looking at you like you’re the only thing that matters in front of him.
“I’m with you because I want to be,” he says quietly. “Not because there aren’t other options.”
Your throat tightens.
“I chose you,” he continues. “I’m still choosing you.”
With that, the uneasiness in your stomach that had been building up all week finally begins to crumble.
"I'm sorry," you whisper softly, tears threatening to escape.
"It's ok," he says as he pulls you slowly to him, wrapping you in his sweet embrace.
"Just don't shut me out again, please. I worry"
Your lips tremble slightly.
“…I won’t,” you promise.
He pulls you even closer, having missed the feeling of your body pressed against his.
He leans down slightly and presses a soft kiss to your forehead.
He stays close for a moment longer, like he’s memorizing the feeling of you actually being there again.
“…Don’t disappear on me like that again,” he murmurs, and you nod, leaning into him without hesitation.
As you both stand there and watch the sunset, enjoying one another's company
You vow to never let a simple misunderstanding get between the two of you ever again.
Gothic Romance!AU. Your newly wed husband, Giyuu, will not touch you. It’s beginning to drive you mad.
18+, smutty at end, masturbation, I cannot spoil the end but… let’s say due to Giyuu’s ‘affliction’ he is less restrained, somewhat canon divergent with depictions of demons… was inspired by Inuyasha that probably gave it away aha
Your husband will not touch you.
The marriage is new, arranged by the head of the Ubuyashiki clan. Giyuu is one of his finest slayers, an upper-ranked Hashira. As a family favor, you resigned from your duty as a miko in order to proceed with the marriage.
Yet.
Aloof. That’s your first impression of Giyuu. He is polite yes, but distant. He's often away, true, but during the few meals you spend together, he's quiet. You ramble and attempt to extract information from him to little avail.
It’s not that he’s a bad husband. He gives you a monthly allowance. He gives you space, a room to stay in (you do not even share a room, much less a bed). But he has not once even so much as kissed you.
At times, you wonder why he even agreed to take a wife.
The life of a slayer is rife with uncertainty. It is likely he’ll die in battle at before he reaches old age. You thought perhaps it was the need for a legacy—but Giyuu has shown no urgency with that aspect of your marriage. Your bed remains cold.
His estate is beautiful. But empty, hauntingly so. In such a large mansion, the endless rooms are scarcely furnished, and you feel as if you can wander for ages and make no progress.
You’ve wandered the corridors once and gotten lost. And found yourself before a sliding door plastered in talismans. A few of them you recognize--for protection, to keep out evil spirits. You nearly open the door, curious, only for a hand to suddenly grasp yours.
“Don’t.” Giyuu's voice is calm, but his grip is tight. “Never enter this room. You may enter any room but this.”
With the undercurrent of steel in his voice, you don't have the gall to question him.
—
He goes out at night.
You realize it a month into this strange arrangement. One night, you decide to seek him out yourself. The other girls at the shrine often spoke in hushed whispers about what marriage life entailed. It was far from your reality.
The air is cold, brittle even, as you delicately approach his room. You’re wearing only a yukata, and the chill has your hair standing on end. When you knock on his door, you hear no answer. Boldly you decide to open it anyways.
His futon lays untouched. There’s no sign of him.
—
“Where do you go at night?”
Subtlety has never been your forte. During a daytime walk around his estate, one he’d agreed to take you on (you feel rather like a pet being placated in its need for attention), you pose the question. He stills, the hand that was feeding the koi in his pond pauses. In his kneeling position, you can’t observe his face.
“You noticed.”
“Yeah, I… sought you out last night. And you weren’t there.”
He peers up at you, his dark azure eyes swirling with something inscrutable.
“Don’t wander at night. It’s not safe.”
Irritation wells within you. You’re not some kind of child to be instructed where and where not to go. This estate belongs to you now as well.
“Are you going into town?” You ask sharply. “Seeking other… women?”
His face is so bewildered that you have to bite back a scoff. Instead of answering your question, he stands up, dusting off his hakama and holding his hand out. You stare at it uncomprehendingly before you lace your fingers with his. You nearly jolt.
His hand is freezing.
He leads you back to your room, slips a book into your hands, and tells you he’ll be gone again, tonight, and to not search for him. He also quietly adds that if anything is not to your liking in the estate, to let him know.
—
Being left alone is not to your liking.
You toss in your futon for the millionth time that night, frustrated.
Curse your husband and his obstinate nature. Why must he be so cryptic? Why are you even here, like an the koi in his pond to tend after, but never touch?
You sit up, deciding a bath is in order. You’ve always felt better after a good cleanse.
Giyuu has a lovely and wide tub, but you prefer bathing in nature. It reminds you of the purification rituals back at the shrine. And thankfully, there’s a river running right behind his estate that leads to a lake. You carefully collect everything you’ll need, your bathing salts and herbs, a new yukata, a comb for your hair.
Then you head out.
Despite the approaching summer, the air is cool here on this wide of the mountains. For a moment, you hesitate. You’ll catch a cold surely if you bathe in this weather. The other part of you says that perhaps your darling husband would show a bit of concern if you come down with something.
The water is somewhere between a nice chill and freezing as you dip your toes into it. It’s definitely much colder than the waters back at the shrine. You submerge your body in it slowly, attempting to relax into the cold, reaching for your herbs.
Something rustles in the bushes.
You still for a moment, glancing towards the treeline surrounding the river. A small animal, perhaps? (You pray.)
The cold is beginning to get to you. Shivering as you rise to your feet, nipples erect and the hairs on your body standing up, you head for the shore. You’ve scarcely wrapped a towel around your form when something tackles into you. Something heavy pins you to the ground, a hand slipping over your eyes, and another over your mouth.
You still, a scream stuck in your throat, fear washing over you.
“What did I tell you about wandering at night?”
You gasp. His voice is familiar, but different somehow. Warped, heavier. He releases his hand over your mouth. “Giyuu?” Relief coursing through you, you reach behind you for his arm. “You scared me—”
He hisses at your touch, and you pause.
“It’s unsafe. Go home. Now.”
The words are out of your mouth before you can question them. “Come with me.”
He freezes, and in the stillness of the night, you can feel his heart stutter. Hesitantly you press against him, making sure it really is him, your hand searching. His muscled form, tightly wound, holding you to him in such a precarious position. You can feel him now, and when your hand trails lower and he hisses again, you’re made well aware of it—the bulge pressing between your ass cheeks. Unmistakable.
You shiver, not just from the cold. And then, as if he was never there, he’s gone.
He’s left you alone, once again.
For a moment though you almost thought Giyuu’s nails were long enough to be claws.
—
Over breakfast you tell him you’re leaving on a trip.
The head miko has requested your presence due to a bizarre increase in deaths around the area. You’re to help with funerals, ceremonies, purifying the area.
Giyuu, who hasn’t even managed to look at you throughout the meal, and who you’re convinced was the subject of a vivid dream last night, a trick of your mind, agrees easily enough.
“Be safe.”
—
The trip is a nice reprieve. You find yourself missing the simplicity of shrine life.
“How is the marriage?” You smile blithely as another former miko tells you about her doting husband, the joys of her married life, a child on the way. A stark contrast to your life.
It makes you wonder—does Giyuu not like you the same way? Is there any point to your marriage?
Will he ever let you in?
—
You arrive back at the estate as the evening sky emerges.
In your room, you stare up at the ceiling. Giyuu is gone again.
Your mind wanders to your dream. Feeling his strong, muscled body pressed against you, pinning you to the ground. His hands clamped over your eyes, over your mouth. That moment when he stopped you from opening the door, and his grip was so tight, part of you wanted him to never let go.
The press of his bulge against you.
Heat pools in your gut as your cheeks warm.
Was it even real? Is this a result of neglected wife syndrome—explicit fantasies and dreams? You shift, realizing the apex of your thighs is wet. Your fingers are already traveling down, parting your folds. You gasp softly as you play with yourself. Your head tilting back, you imagine it’s Giyuu’s fingers instead. Thick and strong, with sure strokes. Staring up at you with that inscrutable dark gaze on his pretty, unfairly pretty face. His pants tented with his need for you, and your hand trailing down to grasp him—
“Giyuu!” You gasp out, toes curling. Only to still once you hear the door slam shut, footsteps padding away. You sit up, disheveled, heart pumping furiously. You didn’t even notice you weren’t alone.
Did he see you?
Did he hear you?
And if he did, another part of you argues, why didn’t he do anything?
You sit up, wiping your fingers on your yukata, your peak frustratingly just out of reach. You’re walking to his room, yanking the door open.
The sheets to his futon are disheveled. But he’s not there.
You know where he might be.
Your feet are taking you to the room before you even realize it. Talismans littering every inch of the door.
You’re about to knock when you can hear it. That same hiss from your dream, a choking noise.
You open the door.
Giyuu is there, but… it’s not Giyuu. Horns are the first thing you notice, along with bright blue veins that curl up his arms and thighs. Glowing blue marks over his face and neck.
In one hand is his cock, erect and leaking, his hand moving furiously over it. He’s hunched over, in an odd kneeling position that certainly can’t be comfortable, not facing the door but not quite turning his back to it. His other hand—which is definitely clawed—digs into the floorboard, the wood splintered under his grip.
The room is in disarray, scrolls overturned, claw marks torn through the screen.
What’s most jarring is when Giyuu huffs out what sounds like your name, jerking himself almost painfully as you hear wood snap under his other hand.
“Giyuu.”
His gaze snaps to you. His eyes are also different, with black sclera and glowing blue irises. For a split second, you see them widen before your world spins, and he’s pinned you to the ground beneath him with a snarl, The door slams shut behind you, and you’re left face to face with your demon, not-quite-human husband.
He’s panting, his eyes darting over your face before his gaze hones in on your hand, splayed uselessly above you. He brings it closer to him, sniffing delicately and—with a flush, you realize these are the fingers you were using earlier. He slips them into his mouth, and you feel the brush of his tongue and—oh, those are fangs—before he moans softly.
Your lips part. Your whole body heating up at the sound. You can feel that part of him twitch against your thigh, and glance downwards
“Don’t—” He murmurs, releasing your fjngers from his mouth. He nuzzles against your hand, his tongue darting out to lick your wrist. Your fingers twitch.
“Tomioka… you’re a demon.”
He nods, gaze steady on yours. “At night.”
Your brows furrow. “At night?” You’ve never heard of such an affliction. Gently your hand shifts so your palm cups his cheek. He nuzzles into it, before stilling, as if embarrassed, his gaze darting away.
“…Half-demon.”
“Ah,” you say. In class Giyuu fashion, that answers both everything and nothing at all.
“Are you afraid?” He asks suddenly.
“I… I don’t know.”
He stills then, taking a ragged breath before grasping your hand. “You said my name.”
At your confused expression, he clarifies. “Earlier. Why?”
“I…You’re my husband.” He groans at the word.
“Yes.” He inhales deeply, making a face as if he’s either pained or deeply burdened by the knowledge.
“Ubuyashiki said that a miko would help curb my urges. But…” He studies you intently. “He was wrong.”
Fear churns in your gut. “Are you… going to eat me?” You ask, unable to stop your voice from trembling.
He leans in. “No.” He says bluntly.
His cock is still half-hard against your thigh. “Then what… what you were… before I got here…” Nothing is making sense. Your head is starting to hurt.
“It’s hard to control myself… with you.” He looks at you, pained.
You glance around the room, in the state of disarray it’s in, and then back at Giyuu, who seems to be battling his inner turmoil.
And while Giyuu has hardly even kissed you, now he’s clumsily placing his mouth over yours. His fangs dig into your lip, nicking it. You gasp into the kiss at the sting of pain, and he parts. He growls when he sees blood bubble upwards, his tongue darting out to lick it before groaning at the taste. down your chin.
Your cheeks flush. Why is this somehow both endearing and hot?
“You said my name earlier,” he says again. “I want to keep hearing it.”
And hear it he does. Until it’s etched into every part of his lonely estate.
