The Only Real Allergy

Requires Epi-Pen

[voidbat]

body: you are dying of The Heat

me: [removes blanket]

body: never have you been So Frozen

[ladyjolder]

me: [sticks one leg out]

body: perfect

[bongboops]

Demon to my now exposed leg:

[justbadpuns]

If USA fails at least we have USB

[just-shower-thoughts]

The Earth can’t be flat, there are fucking mountains.

[paprika]

[showerthoughtsofficial]

April Fools Day is the perfect time for companies to test crazy ideas they have so that they can gauge if the public would actually be into it or not

[just-shower-thoughts]

Hearing one of your favorite songs on the radio sounds immensely more satisfying than choosing to listen to it on your own.

[just-shower-thoughts]

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Wednesday, we all just have to trust that someone has kept count since the first one ever.

[cagaderamental]

[megheadmed]

You need.. you need to unmute…

[cobaltdays-deactivated20210208]

I’ve waited too long to find this gem again!

[colombian-jacob-49]

This is perfection 😂

[opossummypossum]

MOOOOOM

[elriabrunnr]

Who wants to see a FAT otter. A real ROUND boy. A HUGE man. A CHUNKY guy.

[elriabrunnr]

[wheatlev]

Horton hears somebody he used to know

[not-a-comedian]

do you ever regret drawing something

[awwww-cute]

[babyanimalpic]

[bananaphylactic-blog]

job application: describe your most recent leadership role

me: sometimes at crosswalks i'm the first one to start jaywalking and everyone follows me

[tastefullyoffensive]

[ellsari]

[donutish]

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THIS IS TOO MUCH WHOLESOME IN A TINY BODY