ur friendly local sex witch (✿◠‿◠)

Makenzie. queer (adjective), queer (noun), writer, sex ed person. co-author of Imagine Queer Worlds, editor of Rabbit Heart. I do not ever check my DMs. header by inaudiblysticky, Kraven in his flower crown by rosescrownsandvictory.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

ahoy

I'm not a doctor or a therapist; please don't ask me questions that I would ethically need an advanced degree to answer.

Sex Ed FAQs are here; you HAVE to read these before sending in your question pleeeeeease please please please. apparently this link doesn't work for some people using the tumblr app on androids so copy paste this into your browser I guess: https://batmanisagatewaydrug.tumblr.com/faq

check out Imagine Queer Worlds, a queer world building game I coauthored, and Rabbit Heart, a story that @little-tiny-raccoon-hands writes and I edit. it's about a retired hitman and his Chosen One trans daughter getting isekai'd into a video game.

join in my 2026 Book Bingo at @2026-book-bingo 📚 💪 ✨

other frequently asked questions:

how do you feel about people who are trans/ace/aro/whatever other queer identity is currently contentious?

love 'em all, they're great.

what’s your whole deal?

queer

okay, what are your pronouns?

"I still rather think that pronouns come to me from others, which I find interesting, since I receive an array of them – so I am always somewhat surprised and impressed when people decide their own pronouns or even when they ask me what pronouns I prefer." - Judith Butler

are you white?

imagine the whitest person you know. then make them whiter.

what is Batman a gateway drug to?

caring about DC Comics. I don't recommend doing this.

how do I start reading Batman? do you have comic recs?

you don't want my advice on this, the way I'm reading Batman comics is bad. it involves a spreadsheet and (mostly) every issue of every Bat-title published between 1986 and 2011 and I assure you that you don't want in on this. also, I don't really think there's a single best starting point; it really depends on what you're interested in about the comics and what you're hoping to get out of them. I'm not really interested in figuring that out for you (no offense) but somebody on reddit probably has a flowchart or something.

why haven't you answered the DM I sent you? are you mad at me?

I probably haven't even noticed you sent it, I don't really check my DMs.

what’s your favorite color?

#fecee9

have you seen [insert movie/TV show]?

I've never seen a movie or TV show in my life and I don't want to.

what will happen if I walk through this ghostly doorway that’s appeared at the back of my room?

oh, great question. if you find yourself standing alone in a star-lit clearing with a pang of nostalgia in your belly, you’ll probably be just fine. if there’s a charming, talkative animal waiting for you with a kind smile that doesn’t reach its eyes, I’m afraid you’ll need to run. if you look closely you’ll notice that smile has a few too many teeth.

I caught a really nice thunderstorm that I think you’ll like, can I send it to you?

yes, and thank you in advance. sprinkle some glitter on it and hurl it into any convenient body of water; I’ll find it eventually.

are you a Moth Prince apologist?

for the last time, just because he has my sword does not mean I condone every individual action he takes. there’s such a thing as nuance.

what if this FAQ has only raised further questions?

my condolences.

I like the weird shit you do here, how can I give you money?

my ko-fi is here, my cheap-ass patreon is here.

[beemovieerotica]

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

went to letterboxd to log a movie and saw you had seen miami connection. i'm so glad. only through the elimination of violence can we achieve world peace.

FRIENDS THROUGH ETERNITY HONESTY AND LOYALTY WE'LL STAY TOGETHER THROUGH THICK OR THIN 🐉

[dreadwedge]

i test superpowers on my youtube channel. i have every power but no divine calling or moral ambition so instead its just speople send in power ideas and i review them. they will say something like "wifi enabled breasts" and i will try it out and say 2/5 kinda tingle. they will say "power to duplicate and command mice. i try it and say 4/5 my mouses army pleasant softness make me feel content. they say "deep fry and consume your own arms". i say thats not really a power,. but ok. 3/5. and thats the episode that blow ups. now im famous for arms and all my new suggestions are eating different body parts. i could ignore them but the money is too good. i try the normal ideas like jump really high but nobody watches. and i cant just make new money with a power bc nobody suggested that plus i have a deep respect for the economy. cry in my youtube mansion full of mice and i always smell like oil

[shamebats]

Imo the best type of system for children to grow up in would be one that assumes the birth parents/primary guardians won't do shit and takes care of every aspect of childcare that's essential for their wellbeing and development, collectively.

[shamebats]

But I'm just a guy who only learned how to brush his teeth properly and got glasses as a child because we had both a dentist and a doctor come to school on a regular basis. The dentist would have us all stand in a circle with our little toothbrushes and show us how to brush and correct our technique. The doctors would give us general health assessments and then have the teachers contact our patents and essentially peer pressure them into getting us any health intervention we needed. My parents only reluctantly got me glasses because they knew the teachers would judge them if they kept seeing me sit in the very front row and still squint to see the chalkboard. So I'm biased.

[shamebats]

The only times I ever remember seeing a dentist or doctor as a child was at school. I'm quite healthy physically and I'm very grateful for all the care I got from the various professionals who cared about my well-being and development more than my actual parents did.

We had free healthcare including dental, mind you, my parents just couldn't be bothered. When my brother, as a teenager, asked our mother if she could take him to his orthodontist appointments (which he'd already arranged for on his own) she basically told him she didn't feel like it and he had to take the bus.

If I could improve anything about that system, I'd take it even further and make it so kids could see a doctor and get meds, treatments, therapy, tests, disability aids etc. without having to rely on their parents as well. I shouldn't have had to put up with being bullied and guilt-tripped about the family finances and the time investment needed to take me to the optometrist every time I needed new glasses.

[shamebats]

Some parents would not take care of their children even if they were given all the time and the resources. Mine are a great example of that — my mother stopped working and became a homemaker when I was in kindergarten, my father worked from the garage and was also always home. They had a car and our village even had a bus that would come once or twice an hour that would take you to the next two bigger cities.

Did that, plus the free healthcare, translate into them actually parenting and caring for us properly? It did not. They only ever did any of that reluctantly when not doing it would make them look bad, and most of the time they did a shitty job because they could never resist the urge to boost their egos by means of bullying literal children.

So I have to wonder: what did they actually contribute to our upbringing? Like they didn't teach us shit and mostly they just endangered our mental and physical health — but hey, at least they gave me cPTSD! That took some work too.

[anarchistmemedistro]

see also family abolition, and youth liberation .

[applefae]

A knee-jerk response to neglectful parenting I see a lot is “people should have to get licenses and take rigorous tests to PROVE that they should be ALLOWED to have kids” which is eugenics. That’s just the starting line for eugenics.

We are at a point in humanity where there is no meaningful reason why we shouldn’t be structuring our societies around wellbeing for all instead of wellbeing for the “deserving”.

Assume some parents will fail. Build social infrastructure that is designed to support failed kids rather than punish would-be parents.

[queer-riot-dragon]

Parents do not have to be neglectful to fail!

They can be busy, tired, stressed about finances, ignorant, etc. They can want to do the best for their kid and Fail Anyways.

The best thing is to support the children and give them the tools they need to succeed even if the parents are already giving them those tools. Because you can never learn something too much.

[lessproblematical]

Also sometimes parents become disabled or die and family can't always be counted on, and sometimes there isn't other family

[piarenotsquared]

The princess did not get tighter when you called her a faggot— anyone would feel tight with seven fingers in them at least

[piarenotsquared]

The princess has been informed it was just one finger but the point stands

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I guess theyre doing 3 Stooges blogging on my dash now

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

If I got a hysterectomy, do I still need to get regular pelvic exams? I still have my ovaries, but everything else between them & my vagina is gone. I’ve only ever been to the gynecologist a handful of times (most for the hysto), but every single pelvic exam I’ve had has been painful & traumatic. I haven’t been back since my last follow a couple years ago for that reason, but is that still something I even need to worry about - barring any vaginal issues?

well this sounds like a great question for a healthcare provider familiar with your particular health concerns, maybe even the one who did your hysterectomy

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

saw your posts about watching The Room and my god that really is Movie Of All Time

absolutely bonkers, i’ve seen it six times. my favorite was a “pg-13 cut” where during the sex scenes they just…blurred out the entire screen and warped the audio. no fast forward. no cutting. like watching a sex scene through a glass shower with broken headphones. perfect.

they just don't make cinema like that anymore

[pjharvey]

we have to start running a massive PSA campaign to young gay people so everyone understands there is a difference between being a dom and being a top and between being a sub and being a bottom. and also that sometimes you are neither a sub nor a bottom and you're just like shy. we need to be handing out flyers we need ads at every train station spreading the word

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi, no question, just wanted to say thank you for speaking so openly about sex ed and gynocology. it encouraged me to go to a gyn for the first time at 27 and i am now living my best period-free life it's awesome. would recommend

fuuuuuuck yeah

[gatheringbones]

“Life after menopause is exceptionally rare in animals. It can evolve only in creatures where grannies help younger family members survive. Only human, killer whale, and short-finned pilot whale females routinely live for substantial periods after they stop breeding. Like humans, killer and pilot whales have roughly twenty-five to thirty childbearing years, then can live another thirty or so. And as Ken’s just explained, some live a lot longer. Up to a quarter of the females in a group are postreproductive. These whales are not waiting to die; they are helping their children survive. As human children often benefit from their grandmothers’ attention, killer whale grandmothers boost their grandkids’ survival. A rather bizarre twist of killer whale society is that killer whale mothers remain crucial to the survival of their adult children. When older killer whale females die, their adult children start dying at high rates, especially males. Male killer whales who are under thirty years old when their mothers die suffer a tripling of the annual mortality rate compared to males in their age group whose mothers are still alive. Male killer whales who are more than thirty years old when their mothers die face death rates more than eight times as high as males in their age group whose mothers are still living. Daughters under thirty show no mortality increase after their mothers’ death. But daughters older than thirty when their mothers die have more than two and a half times the death rate of same-age females whose mothers are alive. Males’ handicaps of the extra drag of their huge dorsal and pectoral fins and the extra food required for their immense size (at around 20,000 pounds, males can be one-third more massive than females) seem to make them reliant on their working mothers for food. Females don’t have the males’ impediments, but while raising young, females may rely on food shared by their no-longer-breeding mothers. Adult females share essentially all the fish they catch, and more than half goes to their children. Adult males share their catch only about 15 percent of the time—usually with their mothers. While no one fully understands their strange death pattern following the loss of a mother, extreme parental care is likely at the root. Toothed whales are the world’s champion nursers. Short-finned pilot whales continue to produce milk for up to fifteen years after the birth of their last calf, likely nursing other females’ young. In bottlenose and Atlantic spotted dolphins (further study might reveal others), some females never give birth. Denise Herzing dubbed them “career females,” because their role in society does not include motherhood. They might be infertile. They might be gay. But their contribution is crucial: they do a lot of babysitting. When Herzing entered the ocean with a visiting nine-year-old girl, “White Patches, the eternal babysitter herself, had never seen me babysitting a young human before. Her excitement vocalizations were audible and electric and she continued to swim around us, eyeing the human youngster attached to me.” (Researchers sometimes call babysitters “aunts.” That’s precisely who they often are.)”

— Beyond Words, by Carl Safina

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

can yuo post chilchuck keychain please i love that union man

[vonlipvig]

i'm actually curious, what trinkets do you guys have on your keychains? 🗝️

[space-feminist]

people who feel the need to chime in on posts about not supporting hp because of jkr with AND THE BOOKS ARE AWFUL AND HORRIBLY BIGOTED TOO are so completely missing the point it's insane. the content of harry potter does not MATTER!!!! if it was the most perfectly unproblematic piece of media ever it would still be supporting jkr and her bigotry and that would be enough of a reason not to support it!!!! all you're doing is continuing to treat harry potter as something worthy of discussion instead of trying to kill its cultural relevance!!!! you are not an ally and i do not trust you!!!!

[space-feminist]

good omens is by and large a very good book with positive messages but i stopped posting about it after the neil gaiman stuff came to light bc the quality of the content doesn't fucking matter when we're talking about materially supporting people who wield their power & influence to harm others

[icedsodapop]

Look, I'm glad to see more Asian representation in media, but this hype over the Wasians (mixed white-Asians) is making this Asian borderline uncomfortable 😬

[icedsodapop]

Firstly, Blasians (mixed Black-Asians) don't get this much hype for being mixed and we all know why 🤡

Secondly, media and the public almost always put on a pedestal a very specific type of mixed Wasians, those of East Asian descent. I don't see as much hype for the Wasians of South Asian, Southeast Asian or West Asian descent. And of course, we all know why 🤡

Like I thought we had this discourse back in the early 2010s criticising how Asian representation in YA fiction tended to be Wasians?

[icedsodapop]

Bring this back cos no one talks up the Asian heritage of the Blasians like Anderson Paak, H.E.R and Saweetie or the Latinasians like Bruno Mars. No one raises this much hype for the mixed white-South Asian actors. No one includes Olivia Rodrigo (white-Filipino) in the "Republic of Wasia"

[icedsodapop]

The way none of these Wasians are darker than a paper bag 😬😬😬

(Left to right: Lola Tung, Alysa Liu, Megan Skiendiel, Laufey, Hudson Williams)

[icedsodapop]

Precisely. We need to kill this phenomenon of the Wasian nation memes dead. Wasians are literally being used as a trend, at the expense of dehumanising themselves and erasing/ignoring mixed race Asians who don't pass the paperbag test.

[icedsodapop]

God forbid non-white mixed Asians and monoracial Asians criticise the recent hype around Wasians and talk about proximity to whiteness, antiblackness and colorism, or butthurt Wasians will flood their comments sections accusing them of being divisive or complaining about how they are excluded by the Asian community. Babes, Blasians actully get excluded a lot from the Asian community becos of antiblackness, these feelings of not belonging and alienation aren't exclusive to Wasians 🙄

[icedsodapop]

The Wasian meet-ups are just boba liberal bs. Becos yall were so annoyingly loud with your damn meet-ups during AAPI month and acting like victims when yall get called out by other mixed Asians and monoracial Asians for centering your whiteness. Nolan Wells is literally mixed Asian with a Blasian mother who's grieving him, they're from your community as well, but yall are staying mad quiet about his murder and the harassment his mother is receiving 🤡

[icedsodapop]

Here is Nolan Wells' family's gofundme:

Donate to In Loving Memory of Nolan Xavier Wells, organized by Christine Wonsley

In Loving Memory of Nolan Xavier Wells Our hearts are broken beyond words… Christine Wonsley needs your support for In Loving Memory of

[plaguedocboi]

You know what? You’re right. Thank you south carolina aquarium