[beghar]

I beg you I beg you do not block me i m not a bad person i m not anything i m just a worm with a brain i am just chilling and wasting time around here all I wanna do is follow ur blog we can disagree on things because life is not that serious nothing is deep enough to stop two souls from sharing and celebrating this beautiful world and the gift of life let me see the world through ur eyes let me see things how you see them let me understand you let me learn and let me grow don't block me just let me see just let me follow I won't disturb you I won't hurt you please let me a glimpse of ur soul please please please ~.~ ♡.♡ >.< ○_○ ♤_♤

[beghar]

head is spinning over this hoe and his new bitch again tf m i doing letting him stay with me bro why

[beghar]

same place same heavy heart same shut lips before i combust?

[beghar]

if he was in a more secure relationship with me i would feel so much more confident to really be myself and i wont be acting always like m under him or owe him stuff i'd be freer i would dominate in sex, i would be more bantery and free when i talk, i would be able to guide speech direction when we are talking emotions, make decisions when he is going through something, take initiative, just be more confident to take the wheel once in a while and take care of him but most of our relationship i just felt so displaced from my core feeling like he was better and how i need to be grateful for even his attention i could not imagine being myself always too busy to gauge whether i had his approval and wasn't being too much and he wasnt gonna leave any second

[beghar]

i know i was selfish too. i know i hurt him. i know i demanded too much, wasn't patient, brought more chaos than calm in the life of someone already goign through so much. i know, if i just shut up, decided what i wanted, and did not manipulate him into this entanglement with me, he would have been better off. i know. i am weak. and selfish. and inconsiderate after a certain amount of overlooking my own expectations. but i can only overlook ignorance to a certain point. i want love too. i want support. i want to be held. i shouldn't have fought and begged for it from him though. i know. i held onto a hope i created with my own delusions. and we both played the game because it felt easier at the time.

[beghar]

he started calling me narcisistic after i told him his x bsf told me to he thinks he is... the projection is... ummm

[beghar]

been telling myself on repeat... we have to be o even ground. he didnt trust u, dont trust him. he didnt like u, dont like him. just care a little bit less and then u will be fine, just 2 people who know each other. not one pathetically in love with someone so busy within themselves

[beghar]

keep rereading his messages his poems searching each word up look at his pictures hoping to understand him better for a second for what? u r just another on a long list, another tragedy that may make him sad but is inginificant in comparison of his oh such enormous weight of suffering. get over it lava, he doesnt want u to understand him. he gave up a long time ago, u need to too

[beghar]

this fantasy bf i have in my head is so perfect

[beghar]

fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk him

[beghar]

i need to just forget ab it and get on

[beghar]

sometimes i get so caught up in my feelings so much anger and negativeness and then i take a breath and i realise i dont wish anything bad on them just wish some understanding

[beghar]

he is so not over her

[beghar]

i thought people telling me i look like lara raj were just being slightly racist but i just realised this bitch has every statement piece i did... i have always had eyebrow slit, a nose piercing and bindi as my statement look even tho i cant always afford it all the time

[beghar]

uk we were friends, we could have stayed friends. i hate that his behaviour has convinced everyone we were not proper friends

[beghar]

i keep finding myself feeling bad and feeling sympathy for this guy and then

[beghar]

sometimes i be fine and then i see a couple and i think of how stupid i am to waste a year and a half on this dumbass egositic bitchass man i wanna kms.