tachiisms:
He answers quickly – maybe too quickly, but considering what he’s just gone through, it’s understandable. She’s proud of him for wanting to do something to keep his mind occupied, and not letting himself dwell on fear. Reflection is important for all Jedi, of course, but too much reflection turns into excessive self-criticism, and Siri’s pretty sure that such would definitely be the case for Ferus.
Sometimes it’s best to keep moving, and give both the head and the hands something to do, so that the Force can guide balance back into the emotional stress. It’s something that Siri has found helpful on a number of occasions, and advice that she’s given Ferus a time or two as well, when she’s seen that little furrow in his brow that she always suspects means he’s about to think himself into a headache.
Plus, he’d had plenty of time to sit and ‘reflect’ stuck in that damp kriffing duracreet room.
“Good, I’m sure Garen will be grateful,” Siri replies, meaning it sincerely and hoping that Ferus trusts the sincerity of it. Even to her Padawan, Siri isn’t one to just throw around meaningless reassurances filled with nothing more than enough air to fill an Alderaanian puffcake. Garen takes his flight courses seriously, when he’s asked to teach or create them, and she knows Ferus well enough to know that he’ll give Garen sincere and helpful feedback on the course.
She pauses a second, then, not exactly asking what she’s wanting to ask, but also not really wanting to pressure him when he’s already said he’s alright, she adds, “You want another sweetcake or anything?” Even while she means: are you sure you’re okay?
Ferus thinks the question over, wanting to respect it. Because he knows what she’s really asking and he wants to give her a real answer, both because she deserves the truth and because he knows it will benefit him too.
So he takes stock. He still feels shaken, but not afrad. His mind is quieting considerably with the promise of something to do and being away from the school. The stars streaking by outside the ship windows are a comfort just for showing how fast they’re going, how much distance is being put between them and Andara.
There are still feelings of betrayal, hurt and disappointment in Anakin, but those aren’t exactly new. He’s felt them time and again, just never quite this pronounced. He still knows how to deal with them. The strange fear he’s feeling regarding Anakin is new, but he chooses to put it aside.
And he’s with his Master now, who came when he reached out to her. Still tasting the sweetcake.
Yeah. He’s okay.
“I’ll be fine”, he says, both as an answer to the spoken question and the unspoken one. He gives her a small smile and it’s genuine.
