
if i look back, i am lost

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@benjaminblueforever
Adam Lister, “Flowers in a Glass Vase” Watercolour on paper, Size: 40 x 50cm
“Once you realize there is life after mistakes, you gain a self-confidence that never goes away.”
— Bob Schieffer
Hey there,
Like always, ever so,
I'm wondering how you are
What you've been up to
Where your feet have carried you
How many times have you smiled today
I hope many
How I wish to be the sun that shines on your face
The air that brushes your skin
The oxygen that fills your lungs
Life surrounds you the way I wish I could
I blow kisses and hope the wind carries them to you
Little letters full of my sorrow
They tell you I'm sorry
What I wouldn't give to see that smile
Your freckles
Those honey eyes
I know how much they've poured
I hope your heart has healed
Sealed with gold
Years later, I'm here still thinking about those days when I felt free
Our worries left at home as we walked on the beach
I watched you shine
The brightest in that small town, full of so many faces
How all I wanted to see was yours
Watching your feet carry you down the road next to me
Wondering what was going on in that mind of yours
Wondering where you've been and where you're going
How I am no longer at your side
All I can do is count the smiles I bore witness to
like always, ever so
New days are born but mine aren't as complete
tell me you miss me so I can say the same
Until that day, I'll not stop writing little letters sealed with stamps
Sorrow and wet eyes
No kisses for tomorrow…
“We met at the wrong time. That’s what I keep telling myself anyway. Maybe one day years from now, we’ll meet in a coffee shop in a far away city somewhere and we could give it another shot.”
— Unknown
“Trust yourself. You have survived a lot. And you will survive whatever is coming.”
— Unknown
“Don’t kill flowers growing inside of you for someone who doesn’t appreciate the way you bloom.”
— Billy Chapata
“I know this transformation is painful but you’re not falling apart; you’re just falling into something different, with a new capacity to be beautiful.”
— William C. Hannan
Are blogs coming back? I hope so. I miss tumblr and how it was years ago before everyone hopped over to twitter. I miss posting poetry. This truly was the pinnacle of social media, at least for me. Shorthand posts can only do so much to get your point across. I suppose it forces people to be more crafty with posts, like on instagram. I do see people write longer text descriptions and that's good. Keeping that format going. Not everyone will read a long form post, and that isn't always ok. What has social media done to people's brains. I hope tumblr makes a return.
I wrote him in poems
he'd never read,
loved him in ways
I never said.
He was chaos,
I was calm
and yet I held on,
like a tide to a vanished moon.
He may never know
the depth of my devotion,
but even now,
years later,
he visits the corners of my mind
like a ghost
I never asked
to haunt me.
Monster.
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