The Seeker

Benji Dalton || 22 || Humanitarian & Unaligned Human

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

fuisecg:

          “I said someone.” Lark’s rebuttal was colored with lines of amusement towards the other’s question as she bit back a laugh on the tip of her tongue. That was where she was lingering, on the streets at night rather than in the warmth of The Rookery with it’s lights and ability to make her feel again but it was stocked up with plenty of others that wanted her to change her late night habits as the empty vial had been pocketed minutes earlier. Whether she needed the pick me up or an escape from reality, Lark knew that it was only a matter of time before she was floating away into a blissful ignorance where nothing was wrong with her, neither did she ache for the familiarity of people no longer in her life. “If you weren’t waiting for me, then who were you waiting for?”

Another small sound slipped out then, a barely there giggle that was bubbling up as she felt the sensation start to grow and spread throughout her limbs with a weightless feeling. Aster had a way with words, but his elixirs had nothing on Malachite’s when it came to completely diminishing any worry from her mind. “I can continue on if you’d like,” she drawled out with a kick of her toe against the ground as if making the first step to move along. “Leave you for the person you are waiting for or maybe alone with your thoughts, plan out the next move you want to make, and right any wrongs you might have made already tonight.” Lemon whined by her side, clearly displeased with how little she’d begun to feel where it counted. All she wanted was a night to be free of her problems, even if she knew they would only grow worse because of it. “Lemon thinks you could use a friend.”

‘Of course she knows you’re waiting for her, don’t be stupid’. The woman didn’t look the least bit intimidating, but it wasn’t her appearance sending shivers down Benji’s spine; it was her giggles and her laughs, they mirrored her tight grip on whatever sanity she had left. He wasn’t necessarily popular, didn’t know many people, but he knew enough to spot out a lonely and depressed individual; her fanciful demeanor was nothing more than a facade. Yes, it sent shivers down his spine, but he managed to maintain a relative composure. “I guess we were waiting for each other.” Benji stated, feet planted firmly on the ground. He didn’t know her name, couldn’t pick her out from a pool of unfamiliar faces, yet she was no stranger; she haunted his dreams, grated at his thoughts, stalked his shadow during odd hours of the night. Benji felt like the two had become somewhat familiar of each other within their game of cat and mouse. He had become familiar of her energy, of the impact she made and the feelings she stirred. Fascination and curiosity. Made him fearful yet somehow fearless at the same time. He was sure she had also become familiar with his manner and conduct of behavior; or so he liked to think.

She was confident with her speech. Her threat was empty but she knew it carried weight. She knew Benji didn’t necessarily want her to leave, but he also was aware she wouldn’t give up that easily; there was little evidence to suggest she didn’t enjoy taunting him, and regardless it was usually Benji running for refuge. He disregarded her offer and averted his attention to the hound tailing behind her. ‘Lemon’. Benji thought. It could have been either male or female. It’s stride seemed weightless, similar to her’s. He didn’t look dangerous, but he was wary. “What gave it away?” he asked her, curious to see what she knew of him. 

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

nickdalton:

Everything about him softened when he realized it was Benji he ran into. Despite Benji’s words he smiled at the other. “Hey, don’t bruise the ego along with the goods,” he teased with a soft chuckle that matched Benji’s. He might have felt bad about the way his younger brother sprang into action to help him but Benji liked it. Helping people was his thing. Nick was just providing Benji with another opportunity to do that. His smile turned a little wry as he took the proffered pills and water. The pride and joy of the Daltons passing out amphetamines on the street like a high rent drug addict. Wouldn’t the senator be proud. Except Nick knew instead of owning up to his own responsibility for this mess their dad would pass blame to him. As if he got Benji hooked on recreational drugs instead of Benji caving to the pressures of keeping the high expectations on him. Maybe he could help, not with the expectations, those were all Benji’s as the only male Dalton heir worth a damn. But he could talk to Mal, figure out if one of the elixirs would have less issues. Probably would. Nick didn’t know much about elixirs but surely they had to be better than adderall. If Benji was gonna be taking uppers the least Nick could do was make sure his little brother had the good stuff. A helping hand with all the shit Benji had on his plate. Because he didn’t judge Benji for using them. It wasn’t as if Benji was crushing them up and snorting them. Now that would have him a little concerned. Probably. Or not, everyone needed to kick back a little, enjoy themselves, especially Benji. Who was he to judge Benji for having a little fun, drugs involved or not. After a few gulps of the water, that was the only thing Benji had given him that would actually do anything with his fey metabolism, he spoke up. “Actually I’m on my way to find breakfast. Lunch…” Nick wasn’t sure what time of day it was but he knew he had time before work for food and a shower. “You hungry? I’ll let you pick,” he added with a coaxing smile. Usually when they did anything together Nick let Benji choose. A way of showing he cared. They’d do what Benji wanted or was good at. It might not be taking responsibilities off but he hoped it gave Benji a boost in other ways.

Nick’s boyish charm provoked a deep eye roll in the younger Dalton. His whimsical ways captivated most people, and for the most part, Benji knew exactly why. It felt like a breath of fresh air being around someone who entrusted faith with just about every aspect of their life. Someone who was able to carry themselves so confidently regardless of the people they affected on their crusade for freedom. Benji, on the other hand, was strict and rigid, and while people enjoyed unloading their struggles onto him, his personality was far from refreshing. “Relax, I’m not after your ego.” Benji teased back.

“Lunch.” Benji corrected his brother. While they may have seemed like polar opposites, their inability to keep track of time was one of their key similarities. It wasn’t foreign to find Benji in the kitchen at 12am, nibbling on pancakes and waffles while finishing up an assignment. Breakfast was had at dinner, dinner was had at breakfast; but while his brother’s ‘on the go’ lifestyle was responsible for the confusion, Benji’s ‘all work no play’ schedule lead to his muddled perception of time. Regardless, these were one of the odd days Benji actually had time for a decent breakfast, and although not feeling all that hungry, accepted Nick’s offer anyway. “Lunch sounds good though, I’m actually kind of hungry.” Benji lied.

It wasn’t uncommon for Nick to grace Benji with three hours of his time as a way to restore the balance. ‘I take you to places you enjoy, do things you like, and in return you take on the burden of being the ‘Perfect Dalton’. It was an unspoken agreement between the two, and although Benji enjoyed spending time with his brother, he usually agreed to these hang outs as he knew they sliced away at the weight of Nick’s guilt. “There’s a pretty cool cafe just down the road actually. It has some healthy burgers that’ll probably make you feel a little better if you’re up for it?”

[hellosanshine]

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

garnet, amthyst

Garnet- List 3 of your passions

“Wow, what a question. Umm... - Justice- Knowledge- I don’t know..., being true to yourself?”

Amethyst- Do you think age is needed for maturity?

“Not age, experience- which, I guess, you usually get with age.”

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

Ruby and emerald

Ruby- What kind of love do you value the most?

“Love between family, of course.”

Emerald- Is there anything you want to last forever?

“There’s things I definitely hope will carry on past my time. Justice, for starters. Although I think that needs some revising.”

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

opal: do you keep secrets forever?

Opal- Do you keep secrets forever?

“It depends... It really does depend on the secret, how I found out, who it involves. I like to think I have the ability to hold a secret for a long time, but forever? That’s pretty intense.”

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

aquamarine and ruby

Aquamarine- Do you believe the future is predetermined?

“Of course not. Some things are out of our control, I get that, but at the end of the day we are responsible for our actions, mistakes, risks and judgments. I think it’s romantic to think that our future is out of our hands but I think it’s also a little lazy.” 

Ruby- What kind of love do you value the most?

“Love between family. It really does test you in the best and worst ways, unfortunately.”

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

moonstone & diamond

Moonstone- What family do you want in the future?

“I definitely see myself being somewhat secluded, maybe a small coastal town? I would have created a home for myself and my family, sort of like a safe space where open communication is encouraged and my partner and I are invested in the lives of our two children. I’d want an older son, would want to name him Leo and a younger daughter named Ivy or Suki. Do I see my dad being involved in their lives? Of course, at the end of the day although I think my dad is hiding something I still love him and would love him to be part of my children’s lives, but I don’t want him micromanaging everything and everyone. I’d want to stay away from the city and the pollution, give my children the opportunity of freedom and expression. Since I also want District Attorney and to bring some legal reforms, I think staying away from the city would be best for my whole family. I’d definitely love to have my own family. Two kids and a dog, close to home, that sort of thing.” 

Diamond- How important is money to you?

“It definitely means something to me, but I don’t really think about money that often to be honest. I certainly see past it.” 

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

Bloodstone

Bloodstone- What words are most comforting to you?

“Oh my God why is this question making me emotio-- A+?”

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

diamond & turquoise

Diamond- How important is money to you? 

“I definitely understand the power of money, but my ambitions don’t stop there and to be honest I don’t think they ever will.”

Turquoise- How often do you lie?

“The truth always catches up to you so what’s the point? I’ve definitely lied in the past and I will lie again in the future, but I don’t feel a compulsion to lie as other people might. So not very often. I probably lie to myself more than I lie to others.”

[ask-meme]

meme development: gemstones

[waitingale]

amethyst: do you think age is needed for maturity?

aquamarine: do you believe the future is predetermined?

bloodstone: what words are most comforting to you?

diamond: how important is money to you?

emerald: is there anything you want to last forever?

garnet: list three of your passions

jasper: if you could revive a spirit, who would it be?

moonstone: what family do you want in the future?

opal: do you keep secrets forever?

pearl: are you stereotypically feminine?

peridot: how old do you want to live to?

ruby: what kind of love do you value the most?

sapphire: if you could control one element, what would it be?

topaz: are your current relationships with others healthy?

tourmaline: do you like the idea of having a guardian angel?

turquoise: how often do you lie?

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

Task 004- Surroundings

Benji’s Room; Much darker than maybe expected, Benji’s room is simple and clean, littered with indoor plants. Most of his books he keeps in a bookcase in the living room, treating his room as more of a tool for relaxation than study. While most people may expect books thrown on the floor and a messy bed, Benji wouldn’t dare disrespect his very own private space. One thing he prides himself on is maintaining a clean and orderly room. The plants purify the air, the scented candles create a specific atmosphere (depending on his mood), and the restricted lighting makes him feel somewhat isolated, like he’s ‘shutting off’ and focusing on himself rather than others. Benji’s room is a way for him to recharge, regroup and tackle the day ahead of him. 

Favorite Food; While Benji is somewhat conventional, he becomes daring and adventurous when it comes to the food he eats. He’d choose a plate of sashimi over a sandwich, a bhudda bowel over fast food. The approach he takes to life is the approach he takes to nutrition; in order to be the best version of himself, he must eat the best. He avoids red meat, dairy, and simple carbs. The majority of his protein comes from fish, tofu or beans, and he eats an abundance of fiber and complex carbs. He prefers to intermittent fast; eating five days a week and fasting on two nonconsecutive days as a way to manage his weight, and limit his chances of chronic illness. Despite his food regime, he isn’t opposed to the splurge here and there, even on a ‘fast day’, and with his ability to work throughout the night, he’ll sometimes have breakfast (such as pancakes and eggs) at midnight and sashimi for breakfast. 

Prized Possessions; When choosing which degree to follow, Benji had convinced himself he was going to become a doctor. He had brought the text books, the posters, even an anatomical structure of the ribs to the pelvis. Ultimately, Benji decided on law, and while he sold the textbooks and the posters, he kept the anatomical structure as inspiration for helping those who need it most. He envisions justice for all, and while he doesn’t help with a stethoscope, he does help with the law. He keeps it in his room in between two of his plants. While it may also seem unlikely, one thing Benji is incredibly passionate about is his skin care routine. He tries to spend fifteen to twenty minutes every morning and night on his skin, ensuring he appears presentable and fresh for the work days ahead. While he prizes his books and his study notes, the moisturizer, scented candles and spritzers carry sentiment, as it’s a form of self-care. They don’t drain his energy or keep him up till odd hours of the night. He does it for himself, to regroup with himself after a long day. 

Prized Materials; Benji is most definitely a stones over flowers sort of person. He doesn’t have any, but considering their popularity he has seen them in various stores and feels more drawn to the darker looking ones. He doesn’t necessarily believe in their ‘healing properties’ but he can’t deny their beauty. 

[ofmymuses]

trait aesthetic  ➙  { i n t e l l i g e n t }

knowing things has really helped me during T O U G H times

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

orudalannsean:

“Do I look like a doctor?” If it sounded derisive, it was meant to. Granted, doctors could look like anything, but Sean didn’t feel that he carried himself like one or exuded the air of one. From the busted knuckles from yesterday’s training session to the scar on his throat… whatever. “It’s probably not broken, but you’ll have a nice black eye or two to explain to somebody.” The kid didn’t look like he’d so much as taken a slap to the back of his head in his entire life. Sean couldn’t imagine what that was like, to be coddled, and a part of him wondered who he would be now if he had been raised like this kid probably had been. Reaching down, he scooped up his textbooks, turning them about so he could see the titles, before holding them out. “You go to NYU?”

It seemed unprincipled to speak to a stranger with such a tone. Why help if your intention is to belittle? Benji was tolerable, patient and poised, but like the scales of justice he worked under, he found it difficult to create balance when the weight of someone’s ego was tipping him over the edge. “No. Come to think of it, you really don’t.” Benji masked his sourness with a plastered, unfocused smile, unsure of it’s effectiveness. “I’m a graduate student in law. What about you?” He asked the stranger as he peered at his textbooks.  

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

anteuptyleryoung:

“So are you saying you weren’t planning to have a soccer ball sucker punch you in the face? How rude of it to attack you so brutally,” Tyler teased, looping his arm around Benji’s shoulders now that he was put back together and more or less collected. Though he still looked quite the sight; at least blood wasn’t still dripping from his nose but he was a straight up mess. 

“I don’t have any plans,” Tyler admitted lazily, taking a pause for another sip of coffee before gesturing towards his companion with the beverage, “I’d say we go get you cleaned up, throw away the text books, and do something fun. I dunno, walk around, see the sights, play some games, you know.”  

The pull of Tyler’s arm jostled Benji in a fashion that indicated he was much weaker than his friend. Despite having an older brother, the two never wrestled or fought as brothers usually do. He never sported scares or bruises to accessorize his pale skin. He was always a blank canvas, a mannequin. It seemed disagreeable to ‘rough house’ the Dalton prodigy. “You know what, that’s exactly what I’m saying.” 

Like a game of tennis, Benji tossed the idea around in his head. “Hmm...” He pondered, obviously lost in his own thought, weighing the pros and cons. “Sure.” He finally came to his decision, bouncing off the ledge, hooking his bag over his shoulder. “Yeah I’m definitely in desperate need of an outfit change. Did you know,” Benji leaned closer to his friend, as a way to tell him a secret. “That I’ve been wearing this same shirt since last night, it’s disgusting.” He began heading out of Central Park, expecting his friend to follow. 

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

anteuptyleryoung:

“It’s my specialty. You should know this by now. I save every day with coffee and my sweet shining face.” He knew Benji didn’t necessarily enjoy the relentless studying and endless pressure he was always under. That was the main reason why Tyler tried to perk him up as much as he possibly could. The boy had to enjoy something in college, right? He’d spent his whole life under his father’s thumb. At some point he needed to learn who he was beyond that legacy. 

He took a sip of his coffee as Benji did his, smirking as a smile pulled across the other’s expression and doused the previous anger. “Coffee fixes everything, am I right?” Maybe not a broken bone…but that was a small detail. “What would a medical degree tell you right now, whether it’s actually broken or just bloodied? Beyond that I already know the cure. Ice it and don’t be a little baby about it.” It was just a playful tease of course, punctuated by Tyler’s finger poking against Benji’s cheek. “Law fits you better.” 

Tyler’s nose scrunched at Benji’s comment, first swallowing down another gulp of his coffee before entertaining the comments with a response. “What kind of hipster asshole do you take me for?” 

With the company of his friend acting as a sort of distraction, the pain slowly subsided, and the truth off the matter settled in; it didn’t hurt as much as he originally thought. He wasn’t necessarily a dramatic person, he looked at things for what they were but sometimes that window fogged with the strength of his emotions. “Look, whether it hurts or not isn’t the issue- I was just..., attacked.” Benji responded and chuckled at his own joke, even though it wasn’t necessarily funny. 

“I don’t take you for a hipster asshole, I know you’re smarter than that.” Benji smirked. It felt as if his nose stopped dripping with blood. The air felt thick when he inhaled and his shirt stained droplets of red, a stark contrast against the crinkled cream. “What are you doing for the rest of the day, anyway? Truth be told I don’t think I can look at a text book much longer.” 

[benjidaltonrpg-blog]

nickdalton:

When: April whatever day

Where: Any street I’m good

Who: open (come at me!)

Nick reeked with the smell of last nights alcohol. His clothes were clearly from the night before, wrinkled and hastily thrown back on. A coffee cup clutched between his teeth as his hands worked to fix the buttons on his shirt. He could probably use a shower, but he’d worry about that before his shift at the Rookery. For now he was hungry. Nothing at the coffee shop had looked appealing so he’d grabbed his coffee and went off in search of a real meal. A glance at his reflection on the window of the coffee shop had let him know his shirt was buttoned wrong. Nick didn’t slow down his stride as he worked to fix it. He sneered, or as best he could with the coffee cup between his teeth, at a mother shielding her kids from him like asshole was infectious. Abandoning his shirt half buttoned, he pulled the coffee cup out of his mouth to make a face at one of the kids who was staring. Nick turned forward just in time to barely avoid colliding with someone. Coffee jostled out of his cup onto the sidewalk, Nick barely managing to avoid spilling it on his shoes. “Jesus fucking Christ! I know I’m irresistible but damn.” He was too busy worrying about his coffee, his shoes, his inconvenience to look at the person he’d nearly collided with.

With his arms folded neatly in his lap, Benji nodded his head attentively, listening to the student sitting opposite him. She had failed the last legal exam of the year, meaning her graduate position was going to be re-packaged and gifted to the student who performed better than her. ‘She might have been stupid, but she wasn’t that stupid’ Benji thought as she wailed in hysterics. People glanced their way, some obviously irritated for having their breakfast disturbed; maybe a public coffee shop was a poor choice of setting to console his friend. “Your parents won’t hate you, that’s silly. They love you, and they’ll support you regardless.” He offered her cut-copy advice, empathizing with her pain but struggling to relate. She raised an eyebrow in response. “Really? You think so?” Her eyes glistened with a newfound hope. “Of course!” Benji beamed and wiped the stream of snot running down her nose. It was a lie, for all he knew her parent’s were going to be just as embarrassed and ashamed as she was. “Now look. Let’s call it a day, go take a bath, put on a face mask, you just need to relax.”

Benji apologized to the barista for the display of emotion as he paid for the two green teas, and made his way out of the cafeteria. He had called her a cab to take her home and offered his mobile. ‘I’m free whenever, just give me a ring!’ He remembers telling her and immediately regretted it. Truth be told, he wasn’t free ‘whenever’, he had five chapters to catch up on by tomorrow, or else he’d surely fall behind. He could hear himself breathing as he walked down the street, his lungs eating away at the thin oxygen he left for himself. What if he failed? Although he was surrounded by strangers, he couldn’t help but feel alone with his thoughts, the expectations slowly stripping away at his sanity. ‘You’ll be fine. No- not just fine, you’ll be perfect, you’re in the best position possible. Get it togeth-’ In the midst of his internal pep talk, a brutal force almost threw him to the ground, as he stumbled back to balance. The stench of B.O, alcohol and expensive cologne tickled at his nostrils, as he looked up to come face to face with his very own brother. “Nick!?” Benji gagged and covered his mouth, turning away for air. “You look disgusting!”  Although he was usually composed and selective with his language, his impulsiveness sometimes made it difficult for him to mask the truth, especially when speaking to someone he was comfortable around. He was used to seeing his brother like this. It was Benji who used to cover for him, Benji who would offer to nurse him back to reality after one Nick’s crazy benders. “Irresistible? Definitely not today.” Benji chuckled lightly. The stark comparison between the brothers was undeniable. While Nick failed to even get his shirt buttoned, Benji sported a pair black skinny jeans, black ankle boots and a baggy vintage black jumper tucked in but only on the left side of the waist. ‘Where are you going? Where have you been? What have you taken? What are you doing with your life?’ Although he so desperately wanted to bombard his brother with questions, he knew all too well he’d never get a straight answer. Nick was never a fan of interrogations anyway, possibly because he wasn’t ready to face his own reality. Pulling his brother to the side, Benji opted for a much softer approach. “How are you feeling? You really do look like a mess.” He joked, digging into his tote for his water bottle. “I’m guessing you’re on your way to work? Count your blessings, you’re lucky to have almost knocked me out because you can’t go in looking like... Looking like that.” 

He took out a small can of deodorant, a packet of gum, two Adderalls and some hydralyte. He watched as the hydralyte dissolved in the water, giving it an orange undertone, passing the ‘pick me ups’ to his older brother. Although he was a highly critical person, he didn’t necessarily enjoy criticizing his brother. He was aware Nick was all too familiar with lectures about ‘responsible adult decisions’ and ‘good life choices’, but while they had some effect on Benji, they never worked on Nick, evidently. In fact, he felt quite sorry for his brother. He wasn’t sure why he made the choices he was making, but at the end of the day, they were only a reflection of his internal world. He knew the same could be said for himself, with his incredibly high standards.