burning||cities

... ((RP ACCOUNT))

[bensxsolo]

The shift in the energy around Ben came as no surprise to Rey. Her removing her hand had nothing to do with him being unwelcome, or her finding him to be monstrous, as he believed. The touch of his skin had come as an overwhelming surge that Rey could not bring herself to fathom. 

Rey shook her head, but backed away, putting some space between them as she attempted to keep her thoughts straight. She was fairly certain that he could sense the confusion, but she managed to meet his eye. “It is simple. It can be simple. You choose to make it not so.” Her voice was a bit edgier as she stood straighter.

“ … why am I still here?” she asked after a moment, exhausted. “What do. you want from me, Ben?”

Kylo could have growled from the frustration and absolute agony that Rey had thrown him in. It was far more than anything he had been through before, and that truly was saying something. Years he had spent under Snoke’s thumb, and yet slaying him did not free Kylo from the bone crushing pressure. When he killed his father, it only pushed him further into the dark, but he clung tighter to the light like a lifeline. No matter what he did, he still felt a lack of control. He wanted to choose, he thought he had, but the pestering voice in his head kept asking more and more questions, only becoming louder when Rey spoke. Then there was the question, why was she there? At first, it was to force her into the dark, to see if she conceded and if so, it that would have made it easier for her to turn her back on the Resistance. It was obvious that his plan didn’t work, so yeah... why was she there? If Rey were anyone else, he would have killed her for disobeying, seeing that there was no reason to waste any more resources on keeping her alive any longer. The thing was, Rey wasn’t just anyone else, and thus, he didn’t have a sane answer. 

He felt himself breaking, the seams he had constantly tried to stitch together finally coming undone. He couldn’t meet her gaze. 

[bensxsolo]

Rey didn’t know what had possessed her. What was drawing her to Ben, let alone made her reach a hand to his arm; almost for comfort. Even though she had wanted to take his hand she hadn’t. Touching him right then, for the first time outside of their bond, had almost been unintentional.

His eyes and her eyes were on her hand on his arm. She hadn’t expected the strange sensation at the touch; something that spread through her, unmistakable but indescribable. And when Ben placed his hand over hers Rey inhaled sharply, the touch of his skin against hers causing her to recoil. Not from disgust, far from it. But Rey was overwhelmed, and she pulled her hand away, perhaps a bit too quickly. 

She avoided Ben’s eye, looking away. “I … I can’t be the one to turn you to the light, Ben,” she said quietly. “That is your choice.”

Kylo’s jaw clenched and his heart sank down to his stomach once Rey pulled her hand away. He should have expected that even his touch was unwelcome. Kylo’s eyes darken and his fingers curled into a fist. He had no choice, did Rey not understand that? He was too far into the dark, and thus even if he wanted to turn towards the light, it was impossible. Besides, Rey obviously didn’t want anything to do with him. 

He took in a deep breath before lips pressed tightly together, hoping to calm down. Again, he knew that he didn’t have much to expect from Rey, he was fully aware of his actions and how his treatment of her made her feel-- the more logical voice kept saying to let her go, there was no point. Kylo almost felt himself give in; he almost unlocked the door latch behind him to let her run. 

Almost.

“You talk as if this is simple...”

[bensxsolo]

jedireyy​:

Between the two of them, the stubborn tension in the room could have been cut with a lightsaber. Rey could tell that he was in his mind; what he was reliving, or hearing, she didn’t know. But he was struggling, and Rey could sympathize with that. That he believed he was stuck, when in reality he had the choice to choose the right side. 

Despite his glowering and the close proximity Rey kept her head held high. Despite his insistence she shook her head, even as he repeated words that made her feel a tinge of guilt. “Then why do I feel the conflict inside of you, if you’re so far gone? You wouldn’t even be questioning me if you were truly nothing but a monster.”

She paused. “Ben, you can still choose the light –” she didn’t know what compelled her but, on a whim, Rey reached out, her hand finding his arm.

As Rey reached out, Kylo wanted to meet halfway, to take her hand. He couldn’t find the will to move. In fact, he almost dropped once her hand graced his arm. He had asked for her hand and there it was. Sure, it wasn’t the same as what he had pleaded for, but nonetheless, it was the first time she had touched him in a nonviolent manner. 

They had touched hands through their bond, but in person, they had never done such a thing. For a moment, he just gazed down at Rey’s hand before he reached over and let his hand rest atop of her’s. 

[bensxsolo]

Rey could tell that she had struck a nerve with him but she didn’t budge, instead standing a little straighter as he approached her. Instead, Rey stepped closer to him as well, meeting him halfway. She didn’t want him to think that he was successful in intimidating her; not when she felt like she was finally beginning to understand him. 

“And to massacre those children, along with an immeasurable amount of others that was the answer?” Her jaw ticked, the woman shaking her head as she looked him over. As he looked down, however, she paused, allowing herself to relax slightly. “Who is the one suppressing everything, including their emotions?” From what she could see, it was Ben. Whether he realized it or not.

Then, Rey shook her head. “No, it hasn’t. I know you feel it. Ben, imagine the good that you could actually do in the light. The dark has only led to death and destruction.”

Kylo bit down the anger that threatened to burst. His cheeks heated and eyes darkened. He had done awful things ‘It’s too late for you’  voice told him. Whether it was real or not, he didn’t know anymore. Snoke was gone, but the voices continued. Hauntings that only served to remind him of the monster he was. No matter what Rey said, not matter how much he wanted to believe her...

The voices were right.

Kylo took a step forward, further closing the space that had been placed between them both. His eyes trained on Rey and he glowered. “The man you think I am is gone, I’m not sure how many times I have to tell you. Besides, was it not you who agreed that I was nothing but a monster?” Yes.

[bensxsolo]

“And what makes you think that the Galactic Empire was good?” Rey answered his question with a question, seeing no point as to be forthcoming when it was clear he was itching to spark a debate. “The planets destroyed, the lives that were taken – including my own parents?” Her eyes hardened defensively. “The Jedi Council defended freedom while the Empire only aimed to suppress.”

Rey knew, however, that her explanations would be of no use. If she truly wanted Ben to turn to the light side, a lecture would not be the way to do it. She took a deep breath, attempting to rein her anger in, looking down at her hands in the process as she sadly shook her head.

“You aren’t bringing order, Ben – you’re bringing death and destruction to innocents. Imagine the good that you could do, the order you could bring if you used the light. To restore balance to the galaxy.”

Kylo gritted his teeth, his fists clenched. That was his grandfather she had run her mouth about. Obviously Rey had no idea what she was talking about. She really didn’t know anything: about the Empire, his grandfather, him... No, she knew nothing. 

“The Jedi Order were puppets who believed that they were doing right. In that time they took children as young as they could and trained them on how to let go of everything cared for.” He stepped closer towards Rey. “They begin to suppress everything, not even feeling the rawest of emotions, stop pretending.” His eyes then drifted downwards for a moment, willing himself to keep the composer he had been so prone to losing. 

“It’s too late for me, the light’s been snuffed out.” 

[bensxsolo]

With each day that passed Rey could feel herself growing more and more impatient. She wasn’t necessarily patient to begin with; often becoming frustrated, either with herself or her current circumstances. This time it was both, the woman questioning her decision to leave with Ben, slowly but surely losing her mind the longer that she spent in the same room all day and all night. 

Any ‘reprieve’ that came from Ben wasn’t much of a welcomed distraction, not when he used any and all time to try and convince her to join his side. She had expected much of the same, when she observed him entering her room. Rey stopped her pacing, irritability crossing her features when she heard what he had to say.

“Explain what? My decision to use the force for good?” She was snippier than usual, but could she be blamed when she had spent a week in captivity? “I don’t need to explain myself, Ben. I’m not the one using the force to bring destruction, death, and chaos to the galaxy.” The woman tilted her chin as she stood straighter, shaking her head softly before adding – “I know that you feel it.” The pull to the light.

“What makes you think that the Jedi Council was good?” Kylo snapped back, eyes wide as he stepped forward, his fists clenched. “The legends that the world was fed? They had a flawed ideology, making people hide their emotions and passions, letting them fester, how is that any good?!” Images of the constant reprimands he gave himself so many years ago for allow his emotions to get to the forefront. It made it all the more easier for Snoke... 

Kylo’s eyes narrowed, his lips upturned to a sneer. “I want to bring order-” And the First Order is simply the most efficient way to do that. They were pawns, the lot of them. None of them truly understood what real order was, they brought more chaos, but Kylo knew just how to control them. 

He didn’t say anything in response to Rey’s last comment, mainly because he couldn’t deny it, he just had to admit to himself that it was too late to turn. He was too far gone.

[please-step-on-me]

Kylo Ren’s facial scars 

[jedireyy]

@bensxsolo

Rey didn’t know how many days had passed. She didn’t know if Finn, Poe, General Organa and the rest of the resistance were looking for her; she suspected that they would be, that they simply wouldn’t allow her to merely disappear along with the First Order. 

And yet there she was, still in her quarters, time and time again resisting Ben’s attempts to get her to join his side. It was beginning to become quite exhausting, to say nothing of how stir crazy the woman was becoming as she paced her room over and over again.

She was pacing at that moment when the door hissed open, Rey stopping, bracing herself until she realized that it was Ben. Her shoulders relaxed, though the woman’s jaw clenched as she met his eye, asking almost sarcastically – “Do you need something?” 

[bensxsolo]

Over a week had passed since Rey had finally surrendered to the First Order. Many wondered if Kylo was going to finally execute her, others had placed bets as to how long their little power struggle would last. Everyone, for the most part, just kept out of it and continued with their usual duties and orders, not wanting to be on the losing end of Kylo’s temper-- which had only gotten worse. Every time he entered Rey’s quarters, attempted to search her mind, or even try to sway her, he only became filled with rage. He couldn’t be blamed, not completely. Kylo had put all his energy on trying to sway her, to turn her and begin training, it felt as though the search efforts were for nothing. 

For two days, Kylo had left Rey to her own devices, the only ones to go in her quarters were guards sent to give her food or to check if she was still there. He used his new “free time” to hunt down Sith artifacts, researching in his own quarters with the reading materials he already had, and has already looked over-- that was enough to irritate him again. If he didn’t have a strange obsession with artifacts, he probably would have chucked the texts at the wall-- or even looked for Hux just to chuck it at his head. 

Without much thought, Kylo shot out of his chair and marched towards Rey’s quarters. The door hissed behind him once inside, closing them both inside. “Your stance to stay in the light, it can’t be because you think the Jedi order was some grand, wondrous council. Explain that to me.” He cut right to the chase.  

[bensxsolo]

He didn’t answer her questions, but the silence wasn’t necessarily an admission; she could tell, or rather feel, that torture wasn’t what he had in mind. Perhaps Rey knew deep down that what he wanted was to flip her to join his side, just as he had requested weeks ago. That didn’t make her any less frustrated by his silence. 

Rey stood in the doorway, observing the room; one that she suspected was far. better than what prisoners were usually given. But she didn’t remark on the room, instead turning around to face Ben’s eye fully as her jaw clenched. “I agreed to come onto your ship – the least that you can do is give me some answers, Ben.”

“Your answers will come,” Kylo stated flatly. He stepped back, suddenly dizzy but he did his best not to show it. He didn’t want his emotions to get the best of him, not this time.  Kylo stepped out of the quarters and let the door close in front of him, dividing him from Rey. 

He felt heavy. Why didn’t he feel as though he finally won? Where was that victory he thought he would gain? Nothing made sense. 

[bensxsolo]

Despite how clearly she could tell that those around Ben were itching to see harm, justice, whatever they had justified in their heads brought upon her suspicions were only confirmed that Ben wasn’t interested in harming her, not as he barked orders to keep her out of harm’s way.

“I accepted that this was the best option for those on my side,” she answered rather dryly, implying the only reason she came was to save her fellow resistance members. “What are you going to do, Ben? Are you going to question me? Torture me?” She noted that they were far away from everything and everyone else. Was this where he stayed? 

Kylo paused, brows knitted tightly together. He never tortured her before, despite the chances he had, not really. The only torture he would say she was put through in his own hands were the times he searched her mind. Yes, they dueled, but that wasn’t what he wanted. From the beginning, he was open to training Rey, he saw her potential the moment he realized she was far more than some lowly scavenger. 

He ignored her words and turned to a door. He plugged in the code, causing for the door to hiss open loudly. “This is where you’ll be staying.” It wasn’t a cell, but it wasn’t the most lavish quarters either. A simple space with a bed, private refresher, and a chair. Far more than the prisoners got that was for sure. 

[bensxsolo]

Rey could not see any other option than this. To refuse him would only lead to more destruction and death. To follow him, there would be a chance – a chance for the resistance to bounce back, a chance for her to get through to Ben. But she knew, as she walked towards his ship, head held high, doing her best to avoid the confused and terrified glances of her fellow resistance, that Ben would not hurt her. 

“Do not hurt anyone,” she repeated, glancing behind her with a hard stare. “You have me. You have no reason to hurt anyone else.”

They were watched carefully, their disbelief was thick all around them. Kylo barked the orders he needed to, let it known that Rey was not to be touched or messed with. As per usual, Hux sulked, lips quivering with the desire to lash out at his Supreme Leader. He knew better than to express disapproval, that is, if he didn’t want a crushed windpipe. 

Kylo led Rey towards the furthest corner of the ship, guards left behind once they reached their threshold. “I’m surprised you finally gave in and accepted that this was the best option for you,” he began once they were out of earshot. 

[marygooree]

Kylo Ren and The Knights of Ren in The Rise of Skywalker (2019)

[bensxsolo]

It was a shock, to say the least. That he was protecting her, saving her, despite everything that was happening. And she knew, that he likely had ulterior motives, and that the reason for his saving her was multi-faceted and not so clear cut. But she couldn’t simply let it slide; not at that moment, and not when he suggested them to move. Maybe she was making the wrong decision, but at that point in time, it felt necessary.

“Call them off,” Rey said quickly, firmly. She met his eye with a serious, unwavering gaze. “I’ll leave with you. I promise you nothing, but I will leave with you. And that’s what you want; that’s all I’m willing to give.”

With that, Kylo deflected the shot, letting it go wherever else. He did not care. Rey had agreed to go with him. He did it. He wasn’t completely naive, he knew full and well that getting her to fully turn and join him would be another struggle, but he was a step forward. He could have smiled. 

Kylo didn’t take any chances, he called off the attack, and while he placed no shackles, used no mind tricks to control her actions, he followed close behind.

[driverdaily]

Star Wars: The Force Awakens  |  Star Wars: The Last Jedi

[keirametzofcarreras-archive-dea]

Did you come back to say you forgive me? To save my soul?

[bensxsolo]

Ben’s reaction made Rey furrow her brows, the woman finding his reaction confusing, to say the least. The anger wasn’t so confusing, not when they were equally feeding off of each other’s energies, but his apparent hesitance towards the suggestion that Rey be his prisoner … what did he want from her then? Besides her ruling beside him in an impossible scenario that she would never bring herself to fulfill?

Then Ben was stopping a blaster to her head. Rey’s eyes widened, preparing herself as she saw it hurdling her way, but Ben was faster, stopping it before it could strike. Why was he protecting her? What did he want with her? “You’re saving me. Why?”

Ren would have to call for a manhunt later, or at least settle things himself later with the Trooper, who was now running off, knowing full well that he disobeyed orders. Kylo had made it abundantly clear that Rey was his to deal with, no one was to interfere. And now..?

His head turned, his own eyes wide, even though he really was not surprised that he had stopped the shot. “You need to move...”

[bensxsolo]

Was it worth it? To make the sacrifice, in saving all those around her whom she had grown to care for, and fight for, in exchange for leaving with Ben. He wouldn’t hurt her. She could already feel that within him, unlike previous times when they met each other with lightsabers drawn. This was different, and yet, there was still rage inside of both of them – though rage, for very different reasons.

She clenched her jaw for a moment. Then, with knowing there was no time to waste, gave him her compromise. “If I leave with you – you call them off. But that is it. You can take me as a prisoner or whatever you want with me but –” her eyes were stern, sincere. She wasn’t changing her mind. “ – I will not join your cause.”

Prisoner? Kylo’s nostrils flared, that wasn’t what he wanted, why didn’t she see that? Her as a prisoner was useless and would soil any trust he wanted to build with her! No, that wasn’t good enough. He doubted that if she was labeled as prisoner that she would turn easily, but was it the only way? The frustration was evident in his eyes, he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Still, he went to reach for her when he realized something at the corner of his eye. 

There was no hesitation, he whipped around, heart pounding and hand outstretched stopping a blaster fire that neared Rey’s face.