barstool blues

joseph berne, twenty-eight, brother, writer, loose change loser, etc

[bernejoseph-blog]

[ JOSEPH BERNE. 28. CIS MAN. HE / HIM ] is here! They’ve lived in Silver Lake for [ 1 YEAR ] and are originally from [ DUBLIN, IRELAND ]. They are a [ FREELANCE WRITER ] and in their downtime love [ DOING DUMB SHIT ] and [ PRETENDNIG THEY NEVER DID THAT DUMB SHIT ]. They look a lot like [ GEORGE MACKAY ] and live in [ OASIS APTS ].

!! trigger warning: death, alcoholism, cursing

Stats:

FULL NAME: Joseph Klaus Berne NICKNAMES: Joe, Joey, JB he hates them all, but won’t correct you BIRTHDAY: December 25, 1992 (Capricorn) GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cis man, he/him SEXUALITY: Bisexual JUNG TYPE: ENFP-T FIVE POSITIVE TRAITS: candid, charismatic, prolific, devoted, zany FOUR NEGATIVE TRAITS: aloof, compulsive, disorganized, impractical FAMILY: Miles Berne (father, deceased); Lily Berne (mother); @hollybernex (twin siblings); two older siblings and two younger; @mateomercer (cousin)

General:

Born and raised in a big, happy, Irish family. Not much more to say other than the Berne clan’s strong family values have shaped Joseph’s core, so that no matter what, he will always be protective of and warm with his loved ones.

Naturally, Holly has always been his favorite person and that’s unlikely to every change. He’s admired them for being authentic and bold just about his whole life, and has long asked himself What would Holly do? when he has trouble making a decision. Which explains why, when they left for NY, Joseph decided to leave the nest as well.

The initial plan was to study in France, but he found a way to stick around by teaching and tutoring English online instead of being a student himself. 

Realizing he could move around while continuing to work online, Joseph made a habit of never staying anywhere for too too long. He also began freelancing articles, short stories, poems, profile pieces, et cetera here and there for some extra pocket change.

Has lived in seven countries - Ireland (the motherland), France, Italy, Spain, Portugal, Belgium, and the U.S. (current)

After a little over seven years of hopping around all over Europe, Joseph moved back home for more than a couple of months to be with his family once Papa Berne fell ill.

(tw - death) Their father’s death did reel him in some. He came to the conclusion that he would rather be with his family than bouncing from place to place, so he decided to follow Holly on their way back to Silver Lake and has been living with them ever since.

These days, he’s stopped teaching English to focus on his writing and the dachshunds, all while trying to stay out of trouble. It’s just a little difficult for him, though, since it seems to come looking for him--or so he says.

(tw - alcoholism) Since he uses anything and everything as an excuse to drink, it’s more likely his regularly intoxicated state that creates the messes he makes rather than simple fate itself. 

Joseph’s thought process: Got a new assignment? Better let loose and go out for a drink before you get overloaded with work. Got a parking ticket? Best to just have a beer and not worry about it for now. New job? Let’s celebrate with shots!

Anyway, fuck the person who mentions his drinking habits. He’ll most likely wave them off at first and say something about being Irish, but then get really defensive if they continue to press him about it

His coping mechanisms have basically all diminished away, leaving alcohol to be the only thing that really comfort his nerves and grief, and boy does he have a lot. He just doesn’t really realize it yet.

TL;DR - Joseph is a tenderhearted mess from Ireland.

Wanted connections:

Friends - good and bad influences, bros, fellow writers, ppl who bring out his soft side 

Romantic - casual dates (good and bad), hook-ups, exes??? (nothing long term ‘cause ya boy has some commitment issues), flirtationships, uknow the vibes

People he’s pissed off for one reason or another

People he knows from back home

People he knows from when he was hopping all over Europe

[bernejoseph-blog]

     Apart from bikes and cars, Joseph had managed to avoid mastering anything with else wheels. He had always preferred walking around, taking buses and trains, but after seeing Helena glide in, out, and around the apartment complex on her roller skates, his interest was piqued. Mentioning it in passing, he wasn’t sure how serious she was when she agreed to give him a lesson or two; Joseph was determined to hold her to her promise, though. Once he ordered a pair from some dude on OfferUp, he reached out and they set a date. Now, here they were, with the young man tying up the laces to his new, but old skates, too excited (and a little tipsy) to be nervous over the possibility of eating shit. Still, he joked, “Maybe I should’ve have invested in some elbow and knee pads.. maybe I can run inside real quick and get my pillow to wrap around my bum.” Joseph looked down at his feet, then up at Helena. “Before we start, is there any way to, err, y’know, brake?” // @hellklein​

[kaimmunicate-deactivated2022021]

George Mackay

[bernejoseph-blog]

matthew-adams​:

The pieces came together finally for Matt. Holly mentioned him so many times, he already knew so much about him but they have never had the chance to meet. “Oh!” He chuckled. “You are the twin.” His demeanor changed, sounding a tad friendlier now, he shook Joseph’s hand. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

     Noticing the change in demeanor, Joseph decided to take advantage of the new “friend” he just made. Once he let go of Matthew’s hand, he simply said, “Nice to meet you, mate. Have a nice rest of your night.” Then, he turned and carried on with his night, hoping he wouldn’t have to see much more of the other around.

END?

[bernejoseph-blog]

mirellarusso​:

It would have been hard for Mirella not to miss the irony laced in the tone of his voice, which she appreciated with a sly smile. “Close. I’m sure there’s still one more starving artist living in Williamsburg that they’re just dying to interview,” she quickly quipped in return. “I don’t have some tragic backstory. That’s for contestants on competition reality shows. Just because I left doesn’t mean I don’t miss it or wish I were still there. This move was intentional for me and my business. Well, that and the nicer weather as an added bonus.”

Creative-types were always an interesting kind of people, one that she didn’t mind being around. She had always been more logical and analytical, and the creative energy that she did harbor was used for her design businesses. “From writing to photography. You must be a real jack of all trades. Unless you’re one of those people that takes a picture of a sunset to put on Instagram, and you suddenly think that deems you a photographer. Because if that’s the case, there’s no hope for you.”

     “No one’s asking for a tragic backstory. I’m just saying, there’s a reason why you went looking for a way out and probably another one on why you found it,” he shrugged. Perhaps, he was projecting. Perhaps, not. “I miss home as much as they next guy,” he elaborated, “but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t something pushing me out. I’ve been plenty of places and I don’t think I’ll ever stop believing that Ireland is the best place in the world. Doesn’t mean I’ve overlooked what it took for me to get here.” Joseph found his shoulders moving up and down into another shrug. Okay yeah, maybe he had been projecting, but him actually catching it without someone saying so was unlikely.

Joseph did his best to stifle a laugh before trying his hand at another ironic remark. “You mean all these shots of the sunset behind that skyline over there won’t get me on Nat Geo?” He scrunched up his face, playing the part of a disappointed artiste.

[bernejoseph-blog]

itsdanteshell​:

“Well Joseph. You can be naked if you want. But you might get kicked out the club.” He winked and then smiled. “ Oohh ok well I have lots of jobs as I get bored easily. I’m a trained piercer so I can pierce anything you like. But I am also a dancer at Dungeon and I am studying fashion at ucla. Occasionally when I am low on funds for my hedonistic lifestyle I model for photographers and artists.” He dropped his voice to a whisper and his smile turned mischievous. “ And some times they paint me naked… What do you write?”

    As the list went on, Joseph closed his eyes, picturing Axel as a great juggler: One ball was a student concerned with their grades, the next was a piercer, another was the man he had just witnessed jamming out. He chuckled and shook his head. “It sounds more chaotic than hedonic,” he stated as his eyes opened back up, ready to apply his vision to the person in front of him. “Where do you find the time?” After a skipped beat he insisted, “Seriously, I need lessons in time management. I would love some tips.” Then, as Joseph took in Axel’s question, he took a deep breath in, slumping into his seat as he let it out. “I hardly know these days. I’d like to think I write stuff that informs people in some way or another, but with the way everything gets buried under the next thing, it’s difficult to say if that’s true.”

[dailyclash]

Visit Original Link

Lost In The Supermarket — The Clash (The Essential Clash, 2003)

[matthew-adams]

Location: Cliff’s Edge, Heathers Premiere After Party

When: May 7th

Who: Everyone

“Cheers to that.” Matt clinked his glass against other’s drink, almost startled by the sound of clinking glasses. “Did you watch the entire thing?” He snorted a laugh. “I hope not.” 

[bernejoseph-blog]

     The clinking of glass grabbed Joseph’s attention away from the conversation he had been part of, but then dropped from once it reached a level of sincerity his intoxication wouldn’t allow him to engage in gracefully. Turning to his buddy on the right, his happy expression faltered for a moment before deciding to join in on the fun. Though Matt hadn’t made the best first impression, Joseph was currently drunk enough to forgive that. At least that’s what he told himself as he threw his bottle into the toast. “I didn’t even bother actually going to watch it, if I’m being honest,” he said, cutting off the friend that the question had actually been directed towards. “I heard there was an open bar, though, so I thought I’d come celebrate that instead.”

[silverlake-gossip]

favorite residents in oasis?

Changes depending on who’s stayed on my good side and who’s decided to be a little shit that month but, lately it’s been @bernejoseph  @mikayla-tilly  @hellklein   @breannesamaya  and  @sebastianortiz. They know how to make an old man feel welcome. 

[bernejoseph-blog]

“Being listed first means I’m the favorite favorite. I don’t make the rules.”

[feintheskyblog]

[bernejoseph-blog]

anna-ines​:

“I’m fine, I’m just trying to be a good host,” Anna protested, one of her fingers holding onto one of his as he got up from the couch, tightening for a moment before she let Joseph go, shaking her head a little bit at him. When she saw him coming back into the living room after a few moments, arms full, she got up, quickly grabbing the glasses of water before he could spill them, raising an eyebrow up at him when he tossed the fruit - the proud smile was just too cute, and she couldn’t help but let out a little laugh. 

“Wait, you didn’t tell me you were sending him something?” Anna said, looking over at Joseph with wide eyes. “That’s a really great connection to have wanting more of your stuff,” she said, her tone impressed as she watched Joseph, her eyes on his face as he checked his phone, as if trying to gauge he got any news just from his expressions. “What was the story?” 

     What Joseph said or didn’t say, when he said it, all these little details strayed so easily from his mind and memory. The edges of things frayed and the ends mixed together to create muddy middles between one thing to the next. He could have sworn he had mentioned it to Anna, but now that she was saying she hadn’t heard about it, Anna turned into somebody else in his recollection of having told someone. But whom? Who had Joseph told about The New Yorker?

Never mind, it didn’t matter because he was telling her now. He almost apologized for not saying something sooner, but as Joseph looked up form his phone, his heart swelled with gratitude when he saw how excited she was for him. He reached over and brought her in close to him, giving her a big smooch on the cheek and playfully squeezing her. “You’re too cute!” He said as he eased his hold on her, settling them into the spooning position that they were in before, but not before giving her one last sloppy kiss on the opposite cheek. This was his way of thanking her for being supportive. “It’s just something I was sitting on for a while, but finally found a way to write it. It’s not too long actually, so I can read it to you if you want?”

[bernejoseph-blog]

matthew-adams​:

“If I asked for it to be spilt, I would place it on the floor, wouldn’t I?” His argument was getting worse, which was expected. Matt looked at his friend over his shoulder, then turned to Joseph. “What?” He said, he was positive he’d never met this guy before, otherwise he would remember. Sure he was drunk but not that much. His question got him chuckle for a moment, thinking whether he meant Holland or Holly but his gut went with the latter. “Used to be, yeah.” He said with a nod. “How do you know Holly?”

     By now, Joseph had forgotten what had started the confrontation in the first place. All he could think about was how this was the guy Holly had chosen to share their life with? Even if it were only briefly in the grand scheme of things, Joseph’s inebriated state made him gave into bias and convinced him that something must’ve been seriously bad for them to have wanted to spend any time with this guy. "M’name’s Joseph,” he said, holding out his hand. “I’m their twin brother.”

[bernejoseph-blog]

korra-sandoval-aguilar​:

The brunette smiled as Jo explained his troubles. “I’m good at googling them?” Korra frowned her eyebrows letting out a sharp laugh, echoing through a not-so-full park. “A ver” she said quickly before put the lollypop in her mouth. She fumbled closer to him and extended her hands to take the camera from Joseph “may I?” the brunette asked looking up at him with one cheek ridiculously puffed in a shape of hard candy. Korra was known to be an impulsive person and the fact that she didn’t straight on grab the object from Jo’s hands was a testament to her trying to act against that instinct.

     “Please,” Joseph said as he handed it to her with perhaps too much enthusiasm. He was beginning to hate that he had to carry it around everywhere if he was going to learn to use it properly. Handing it off felt somewhat like a relief kin to the kind he got when returning an infant into their mother’s arms. He was almost tempted to give the damn thing to her, but promptly reminded himself of the amount of money he had spent on it, causing him to become possessive of it once more. His hands trailed under the camera, acting as a safety net should it slip from Korra’s hands, before Joseph quickly brought them back to his lap as he realized it would be a bit strange to keep his hands floating beneath the camera. “What are you going to take take a picture of? We can walk around a little if you want just... be careful, please.”

[bernejoseph-blog]

august-mellencamp​:

“Like torture,” August answered with even a beat to think about it, one eyebrow arching up as she spoke, leaning against the back of the bench. Maybe it was an exaggeration - but no, not really one at all, if she was fully being honest. She had left Silver Lake for a reason, and being back just reminded her of all of it. “It’s impossible not to want to be in Paris over Los Angeles, so thank god you haven’t been brainwashed by everyone here into thinking otherwise,” she replied. “Congratulations on the writing though. How’s that going?” August asked, crossing one leg over the other as she faced him slightly more. She was a dancer - pretty much anyone giving up on a traditional career had support in her books. 

     “Where’s the pain?” Was all Joseph could think to ask. Somehow--though he found immense joy being near part of his family again--a dark flurry seemed to have followed him to Silver Lake. Somehow he could relate to August’s torture, though he didn’t know what it was. He wasn’t even sure he would be aware of it had she not said anything, but now that she mentioned, he wanted to know: Was it in the gut, but somehow out of the body at the same time? While it was what his question meant in so many words, Joseph was still interested in knowing about August’s own pain.

As she congratulated him, he chuckled bashfully, nervously scratch at the back of his head. “The writing is going okay. I can’t be so selective with my work these days, so I’ve written a couple of pieces on weird things. Like salamanders and moving boulders,” he replied. “But I also am getting better opportunities, like a couple of pieces in The New Yorker.”

[bernejoseph-blog]

sofiagiatti​:

Taking her laptop outside was decidedly less relaxing than she’d hoped, as the nearby coffee shop’s wifi struggled to load a single webpage. She looked up in confusion as Joseph joined her on the bench. “Hey yourself. Were we supposed to meet? We’re doing a meeting thing? Chilling? Hanging out?”

     Pursing his lips for a beat before smiling over at her, Joseph replied, “No, I just saw you sitting here alone and thought I’d come say hi. Maybe catch up ‘cause I feel like it’s been a while.” He had hype focused on his friend’s face out of the serendipity of running into them and hadn’t even noticed the laptop until it was too late. Feeling a bit inconsiderate once he realized he could possibly be distracting her from an assignment, he quickly added, “If you’re busy, though, we can just schedule a meeting thing for later.”

[chris-evans]

Euphoria (2019) Malcolm and Marie (2021)

[jesse-custer]