@Berner415 @berner415-blog-blog - Tumblr Blog

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Mannnnnnn. Trying to parent & Run these company's is the hardest thing in the world ... Anyone that knows me or follows me knows how much I love my daughter . And up until she was 3 I was with everyday . Stuff picked up , me & her mom broke up & the last 3 years have been hell ... Fighting for custody , winning 50 % .... Than comes all the tours & recording of projects ... The clothing lines & water company . Now a merch company . My biggest fear happened today ... I called her to tell her i was coming to get her for the day on sun & bring her home on mon . I heard it in her voice ... All the excuses on why she shouldn't come. Shit broke my heart . This is my best friend were talkin about .. My life . The reason I'm doing everything I'm doin . We are growing apart . And coming to her dads house sounded like a punishment . Shit hurts. I no she is only 6 & she has her friends & sisters. But I never imagined this . It just sucks . Ill fly to San Jose right after any show if its a school night & take a town car to Santa Cruz just to see her for a night .. I do everything I can to spend free time with her . I was her hero & best friend & work is slowly taken that away . I love my job & but I love my daughter more . I just need to find a balance . Her mom told me not to stress & she was in one of those moods . I just don't wanna loose that bond . Seeing her smile is the only thing that makes me happy deep inside .

Life

Man .... Spending all this time with my daughter Janelle really got me thinking . . Seeing how fast she is growing . I need to be back involved 100% . I'm missing out big time and she needs me. I love music so much . U guys no that . But you live once . & I wanna spend my time here raising her . I wanna drop this drugstore cowboy & end it all wit 20 lights . Focus on my clothing lines , merch company , water company , write my movie .. But most importantly be a great dad full time. Maybe I just feel like this now & ill change my mind. But I really feel like that's what I wanna do . She is so incredible & talented . I just don't wanna miss out anymore . Life is a trip. I've done more than you guys could imagine. It's a blessing I'm not in jail . My real supporters will understand . I will always make music. Just don't no about full time anymore. Fam first . Right ??

Life ......

Sometimes when ur in this Bizz u gotta sit back and watch what's going on around u , relax , focus on family & put ur kids first .... For those that follow my movement you no I put 100% into the quality of my projects . From packaging to production to just making sure that every record sounds right . I put out 5 albums in 2009 That all hit billboard charts . Shit . I've came a long way since my first album in 2007 .. Alot of people say the weekend at Bernie's & the white album were classic . As well as the traffic series with ampichino , the drought season series with the jacka and the blow series with messy Marv .... I've came a long way . I recently took a Lil break and just wanna to say this ( urban farmer ) and 20 lights will be insane . I'm just getting started ! I really wanna thank wiz ! Signing with him only made me focus more on the quality of my music ... Alot of people are concerned that my sound will change and I won't be collaborating with certain artist anymore .NOT TRUE ! That's the best thing about TAYLOR GANG ! We all have our own sound and wiz stands behind all of us 100% ! Nothing but love to everyone that has been with me since day one ! Expect nothing but incredible music ! I got 2 clothing lines in the works and im still writing my movie packs ! ! I just felt like since I haven't dropped anything since the white album I had to let my people no where my head was . .... TGOD !

4 MONTHS ......

I'll never forget when my mom Told me she had cancer . How hard it hit. I was fresh back from Atlanta . Every possible way to beat it failed. Il never forget when they told her she had 4 months to live. I was in dis belief . There was no way such a beautiful , young person could be given a such a small amount of time to live. Her first words to me ..... JANELLE ... she knew I was gonna be ok . But my daughter. She loved my daughter. And it killed her inside to no she wouldn't watch her grow up . I remember when the doctors called a priest because they said she was on her last few days. The fluid took over her lungs. After the priest left and all my family said there goodbyes to her , a doctor I never saw before came in the room . I have an idea he said . He proposed that we should insert tubes on each side of her lungs, drain the fluid and help bring her back . He said it would be temporary . But he didn't think it was her time . Everyone was against it. My Lil bro told me he supported my choice . I literally had to fight with everyone . All she wanted Was to get out of that hospital . She had went in when her lungs collapsed and never came out . She spent her b day and everything in there. the procedure worked. It was crazy ! She couldn't believe when she woke up that they were just gonna let her go . A few days later . She came home . she had tubes around her lungs I had to drain everyday . She came home ! In a matter of fact . She was able to enjoy thanksgiving , Christmas , we even drove her to so cal and let her see her Fam , shit we even went to universal studios .. We celebrated new new years together .... On 1/16/10 she let go . In the comfort of her own home . It was weird . She was alive . Up and walking , laughing , living and doing what she needed to do before she left. I'm glad me & my family got to take care of her . Im glad she got out of that hospital . I'm glad she passed away @ home . I miss her . She was 54 . She was my best friend . Life is short . And we need to enjoy it . Kaiser made a bunch of mistakes ! We can get into all that later ... But they fucked up big time ! 4 months though . 4 months . Life's a trip !

MY CURRENT SITUATION ....

We all no this music Game is crazy . From record labels that won't pay to biz partners that don't trust ur movement & vision .. All that ... So I took a break. . I sat back and watched .. I watched new artist & old artist. I listened to there music, watched there video's and blogs .. Just watched . ive been doing lots of shows and features but I haven't even thought about my next project .... Shit ... I even started a clothing line with wiz Khalifa and skech #FRESHKO ... Well ... I'm ready to start going in . Me & cozmo are going in on this new project ! In a matter of fact . I'm gonna release a few albums for free DL before #20lights ! Everyone that actually follows my music . Prepare to hear the next level . I got Alot to say ! I can't wait to drop this project produced by coz ... And this clothing line with wiz & skech ! Thank u to all my supporters ... It's time to really let em no what I'm capable of doing . Bern

Family first !

U always have to put your family first .... I'm chillin with my daughter. Bout to turn my phone off. We got shopping to do and movies to watch ! #holidays !

Dec 3 avalon in santa clara Dec 9th Americas pub in Kc Dec 11 cannery row festival san jose Dec 11th agenda lounge in san jose Dec 15th Americas pub in Kc Dec 17th salt lake city Utah January dates coming soon ..

Turkey bag for turkey day !

Yup yup

Monday nights.. Alot happens on a Monday night . I'm out & about ..

Berner show dates!

Friday 10/21 .. Modesto .. Club rain Sat 10/22 Santa Cruz .. Catalyst Sat . 10/29 Sacramento . 7323 home leisure plaza Nov 5th. Visalia .. Ppav hall

What's next !

Cookies clothing #20lights ( solo ) Stoner girls gone wild DVD Berner & san Quinn ( cookies & cream ) Berner & lucky Luciano Drug store cowboy ( solo ) Up in smoke 2 DVD Fed x ( next day air ) solo album

Bout To bring the smoke a thon back with these hash wraps ! Hahaha . Gotta Bern one of these with wiz & Spitta

Loaded !

This how a Berner show looks! Cloudy ! Can't wait to hit Santa Cruz again !

The side effects from most medicine

Is just fucking ridiculous ! This shit they gave me causes shortness of breath, loss in sleep , makes u nervous , makes you sweat , makes u nauseous ... Shit the list goes on ..... And they wanna trip off medical marijuana. Fucking crazy !

Thank god I called 911

I guess I had a really bad allergic reaction from Thera flu .. Broke out in crazy hives , couldn't breath and throat hurt. They said my throat was closing up and I def could have died if I didn't call.. Fucking trippy! Ive never had an allergic reaction before .. But this shit was serious. My dumb ass was gonna pop a few Xanax and fall asleep! So glad I didn't ! Sheeeeesh !

Dear uggy mouth

No one wants your help bitch. 20 people in line in the bank and not one wanted your help. When I'm in the bank I wanna deal with the teller. And them charcoal grey teeth with baby shit breath doesn't help convince me to do different . Hoe u approached every person in line trying to get them to make it easier for your co workers and not one person responded to you. Old slow poo mouth bitch. You really just fucked my appetite up

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