BerryAzule Recs

All my recs+ some reblogs

[berryazulerecs]

𝑁𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑔𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

𝖠𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝖬𝖾 she/her | Scorpio | INTP-T ♡

I am also incredibly inconsistent with posts, sorry about that :)

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

𝑈𝑠𝑒𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝐿𝑖𝑛𝑘𝑠

Original blog - @berryazule

Masterlist of recs

[hanginginthevoid]

syewe

𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 Neteyam x Reader

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 You reminisce of the first time your mate tried the fatty flesh of the creatures that reside in the cold waters of the Herwìslär territory.

ᶜʷ cannon divergence, a child, probably misinformation ab muktuk :/

ʷᶜ 1.4k

The Metkayina say that the sea gives and the sea takes. Even though your climates could not be more different, the same reigns true for the Herwìslär. Well, as true as it can. There are vast lakes that reside in the region of Pandora that you reside. 

Some of them have their upper most layer freeze, only thawing during the few warm months of the year. The largest however, are able to stay as liquid the whole year. The water so cold that just dipping a finger in would result in tingling going through the appendage. 

Falling in could, would, result in death for a Na’vi if there weren't proper measures taken. Even with the extra musculature and fat that your people have accumulated to withstand the harsh conditions, it wouldn’t be enough to insulate your organs from the subzero temperatures and windchill that come from being wet. 

It would seem that the lakes would hold no life, why would Eywa want to torment something by living in such awful conditions?

Many creatures reside in the waters though. Their skin inches thick with furs that line the outside and prevent the freezing water from touching the wildlife. Between the skin and the muscles is  a thick layer of fat. 

All the animals that live in the lake have it; the fish, the passive animals, the beasts. The Herwìslär took to hunting the animals when they had first arrived to the region thousands of moon cycles ago. At first the fat had gone to waste, many tropical forest animals did not have fat and your ancestors didn’t want to risk ingesting something that may be a waste of stomach space.

Eventually, it became clear that they were wasting much of the animal. The overwhelming amount of fat meant that there wasn’t as much space for the muscles that they were used to eating; it ultimately led to hunting much more frequently than wanted.

It was only when the Tsahik at the time determined that Eywa was about to show her distaste for the waste, that your people started eating the fat. They tested different ways of consuming it; roasting it, adding it to a covered container with salted water and herbs to ferment, freezing it overnight, even eating it raw. 

Soon it became a popular part of the community feasts. The hunters no longer felt aches that resided in their bones, the healers lost the fog that overcame their brains after a few hours in the healing hut, the carvers fingers no longer twinged over a few hours of having them grasping a knife. 

To live in the cold, you must consume the fat. If you did not, your body would begin to break down, would deteriorate at a rate you weren’t prepared to face. 

It was important for the Sully’s to consume fat more than the lean meat when they first arrived. They needed to pack on weight quickly, to gain something to prevent their wiry bodies from withering away. You allow them to avoid it their first meal; allow them to have comfort in the foods that seem most similar to their own after their long journey.

But the second day, during the midday meal, you line them up and sit them down before a large platter of fats. You’ve adorned it with all the different ways of preparing it, wanting to give them the chance to learn what way tasted best to them.

Neteyam’s voice comes, curious as ever, “What is this?”

In front of the Sully children rested a hearty meal, one fit for Herwìslär clan members. Their curious gazes peered at the thick, dark skin, that cut harshly against the light pink of the fat at the end.

“It is a meal. You must eat it if you wish to live here.”

Lo'ak pipes up now, “That much is obvious, zusawkrr olo’eykte, but what animal did it come from? What part of the body did it come from?”

You kneel in front of them, almost protectively over the spread. “It came from the prey I hunted today. Now eat, you can ask questions after you’ve tasted it on your tongue.”

Each of them move to pick up a piece. Kiri goes for a roasted piece, Lo’ak snags a frozen one, Neteyam reaches for a pickled piece and hands it over to Tuk before grabbing another for himself.

Slowly, unsurely, the pieces of fat eventually make it to their mouths. You can see the hesitancy shine in their eyes as they catalog the taste. Trying to decide if they like the fishiness of it, if they texture of the skin bothers them, if they like the specific way of preparing the fat that they chose. 

“It is different from the forest meats, but I like it.” Neteyam speaks first, smiling as he makes eye contact with you. 

Tuk nods, reaching for another piece, roasted now, “Me too!”

After the youngest Sully breaks the dam for getting seconds the rest dive in. Quietly murmuring their thoughts as they indulge, ‘it holds onto the taste of the smoke better than yerik meat!,’ ‘this piece is tangy, what herb causes such bitterness?,’ ‘this one starts crunchy, but then melts as you chew.’ 

They try to encourage you to indulge in the fruits of your labor. Offering you pieces, as it was your kill. But you allow them to eat it all, knowing that it's more important for them to put on weight right now. 

As they begin to finish Lo’ak speaks again, “So what is it?”

“It is the fat of the water creatures.”

They all blink up at you, confusion slowly creasing their brows before Lo’ak speaks again, “The fat? In the forest we discard those pieces.”

“It has great energy properties.” You begin to rise from the seat you had taken, “The ancestors used to only eat the lean meats, but they grew exhausted easily, could barely complete their duties.”

You fully stand now, motioning for them to follow, “The Tsahik had visions of Eywa growing angry at the waste of the fats. It was then that we began to realize the importance of the fats.”

A bubbling, giggly laugh draws your attention. Drags you back to the surface from the deep memory you had submerged into. 

In front of you sits your daughter Lu'nali. You were snacking on some fat when she reached her plush fingers towards the piece you were just about to place in your mouth. 

Her teeth hadn't grown in yet, still small enough to be nursing. But that did not mean she couldn't gum at the fat; many adults described it as ‘melting in their mouth’, and if it did it should slip down her throat easily enough. 

So you had given her the piece, placing the fat onto her small tongue, before telling her to suck. Her little eyes lit up, a gummy smile breaking around the fat. Then she was back to eagerly sucking on it.

Her delight at the taste had flung you back to the past, encouraging you to reminisce on how it had been when her father and his siblings had experienced the same thing for the first time.

Lu'nali had dropped the piece. It laid dusty on the ground, so you move to reach over her and grab another one. As you do Neteyam approaches. 

“Kaltxì sevin,” A kiss is placed on your cheek, before his hand reaches over to squeeze his daughter's cheek, “‘itetsyìp.”

“How was the carving?” You place a new fat into Lu'nali's waiting mouth, then turn to face your mate. 

He's staring at where the fat was currently being sucked on, perplexed expression adorning his face, “It was well. Should Nali be eating that?”

You hum, laughing a bit, at how protective he is. “It is fine, she is simply gnawing at it.”

“Ah.” His nose nuzzles into your temple, “She is much like you.”

You pull away, a small scoff leaving your lips. You hand off your daughter, moving to stand and ease the ache that's begun in your back and hips. 

“She is much like both of us. Do not act as if you do not savor the fat too.”

When you look back over you can see Neteyam shove some food into his mouth, pushing it into his cheek as you shift back. 

Another light laugh leaves you. Not able to believe that this is where your life has led you. 

“It will be good for her to gain some fat of her own, to stop leeching off of me.”

Neteyam dramatically gasps, curling Lu'nali into his chest, “Ma parultsyìp, does not leech off anyone!”

He turns away from you, dragging your daughter to the other end of the hut, humming a song from his childhood. The warmth that blooms in your chest is very similar to the fire you had roasted the fat over this morning.

Neteyam's little faux outburst had you wondering who Lu'nali would take after more when she grew older. It did not matter though, you knew she'd be perfect either way.

Translations: ‘itetsyìp - little daughter Kaltxì sevin - hello pretty parultsyìp - term of endearment for children

a/n: little sweet drabble as i write another angst piece, don't get used to it ;)

This is directly related to my fic 'ketstun -> sang' so give that a read if you havent already!!

Dividers by @cursed-carmine

[fleurlia]

borrowed blue | neteyam sully

pairing. neteyam x reader genre. fluff, angst word count. 15k songs to listen to while reading. out of the woods, taylor swift. i know places, taylor swift.

part one

summary. when your mother was invited to work on Pandora, she had only two conditions: that both her daughters came with her, and that a cure would be found for the youngest one’s disease. one of the first things she told you was that Pandora was lethal, but the most dangerous thing you could do was fall in love with it. everyone around your new home whispered stories about Jake Sully, but as the eldest daughter, all you cared about was protecting your family, no matter the cost.

after two years of active service as a soldier in the war between Na'vi and humans and an experiment that practically stole your body, now you barely recognize yourself without the borrowed blue skin and amber eyes. yet Pandora has a way of pulling together what is meant to be, even when it makes no sense at all.

and that's how she brought you, Neteyam.

or in which. nothing you had was ever truly yours, not your body, your health, your mind, nearly your soul. all you wanted was to feel like yourself, but you were still trying to find her. what you found instead was Neteyam, the future Olo'eyktan of the people you were fighting. and even though you knew how badly this could end, you saw him. and he saw you too. not the borrowed blue, only you.

author's note. after a few days of writing like crazy and seeing all your requests for part two, i got so excited that this became the longest thing i've ever written. i hope you enjoy it and make it to the end, there was simply so much i wanted to share with you all. let me know what you think!

1813 HOURS — OPEN WATER, METKAYINA BORDER the seawater was freezing that afternoon, despite the sun still painting the horizon in shades of orange and gold.

it had been years since his Ikran had been replaced by an Ilu but Neteyam still missed the wind on his face. the feeling of touching the sky or of reaching places the ocean simply wouldn’t allow. but he had learned to find beauty in the sea, in the way the sun with its light danced beneath the waves, in the silence of the depths, in the colors of the reef.

when they arrived at Awa’atlu, his only recurring prayer to Eywa was that he could adapt. if perhaps he could understand that different world and its traditions more quickly, he could help his siblings feel a bit more at home.

there had always been an unspoken but very loud responsibility resting on him, not only as the future leader,as the eldest brother. that weight was more familiar than his own reflection in the water.

despite a peaceful childhood, they'd been raised in war. Neteyam had been trained to protect, to lead, to never hesitate. protecting his family was worth any risk. it was exactly who he was.

and despite being part of the Omaticaya warriors, he had found his place there, in the waters. it wasn’t home, but in some moments, rare and precious, he felt it could be.

on the horizon, he could see where the trees began to meet the land, bordered by an endless sea. he was patrolling the waters around the reef. routine mission. there was nothing unusual about it.

except that he had volunteered for this patrol.

and the one before it.

and the one before that.

deep down, he told himself it was normal. he was a warrior, and patrols were part of the routine. but after the third time he volunteered — when Aonung insisted that he could do it this time, that Neteyam was doing too many patrols and even laughed while saying they were already part of the clan, he didn't need to keep torturing himself — it took ten minutes before Aonung finally gave in.

Neteyam had to admit the truth to himself.

of all the patrol routes, this was the one that passed closest to the border before the forest. closest to where the humans patrolled.

closest to where he might see you again.

skxawng, he thought bitterly. why would he want to see you again? so you could have your third chance to kill him? 

questioning wasn’t in his nature. he followed orders, leaving the asking to his younger siblings, but since the day he'd laid eyes on you, he couldn't stop wondering. he knew it was foolish to be there, searching so insistently for someone he shouldn't. but he couldn't stop 

three weeks had passed since that day in the forest. Lo’ak had healed from his injuries and, to Neteyam’s quiet relief, didn’t seem to notice the change that had settled into his older brother. part of him wondered why the most questioning person he knew hadn’t asked a single thing about you.

unluckily, his father was the one who seemed to be extremely attentive to his actions now. which made Neteyam's heart race, because he knew - he knew -  that his father suspected something had been left unsaid. maybe he would never learn the full truth. but if Neteyam kept acting like a complete skxawng, it wouldn’t take long.

whatever he’d been telling himself no longer mattered. no matter how many times he tried to bury the thoughts, he still found himself asking the same questions he'd probably never get answers to.

why risk so much? what did you see that made you choose mercy?

the questions haunted him.

so did your eyes. they felt familiar, almost like his own, but with something human behind them. something he recognized, yet couldn’t name.

his ilu dove beneath the surface, and Neteyam let himself sink into the quiet. down here, at least, the thoughts were slower. the pressure of the water felt easier to bear than the pressure in his chest.

Avatars usually gave themselves away at first glance. it was easy to tell them apart from those born Na’vi.

you didn’t.

you had different features, too delicate to be one of them and too strong to be purely human. and against his better judgment, he caught himself thinking that perhaps you were just as beautiful outside that body as you were within it.

he wanted to ask his father about it, about the human body his father had once. if he still remembered himself in that smaller, fragile body. but before that day in the forest, it had never mattered. his father was simply... his father. the Na’vi Olo’eyktan Neteyam had known all his life.

and to ask those questions now? it would be like lighting a flare saying "dad, something happened that you need to know."

no. it was better to keep it to himself. 

naturally, this was the exact moment Lo’ak chose to keep his mouth shut.

Kiri would understand, maybe. but telling her meant making it real. meant admitting he'd been thinking about a sky person for weeks.

in the deep blue of the ocean, surrounded by nothing but his own thoughts, something in him tightened. he closed his eyes, trying to picture your face, only to realize certain details were already slipping away.

your expressions and your eyes remained painfully clear. the rest faded, as if his mind knew that remembering was wrong.

the thought that he wanted to see you again made Neteyam shudder. human or Avatar. he tried to force it down, to let the water swallow it.

he had killed avatars before. humans too. in war. in defense. 

but the thought of you, the way you had looked at him, the choice you had made…

he couldn’t see you as an enemy.

and he didn't even know your name. had risked everything for someone whose name he'd never heard. the absurdity of it would've been funny if it didn't make his chest ache.

but lately, he’d learned that everything connected to you unsettled him in some way.

because in war, clarity meant survival. hesitation meant death.

and he was hesitating.

Neteyam broke the surface, breathing in as water ran down his face. the sun was finally setting now, purples and blues slowly overtaking the sky. he should go back. report that everything was under control.

but he stayed floating there for a few moments longer, staring toward the distant forest.

the question that had been stealing his sleep, the one that was making him doubt everything he’d believed his whole life, returned to him again.

who are you? he thought, eyes fixed on the line where forest met sky. and why do you stay with me?

then, no answer. not that he expected one. Neteyam was tired of his own thoughts, but they were the one thing he couldn’t get rid of. he’d spent days alone with them already. all that remained was the sound of the waves and the distant cry of an ikran.

he turned his ilu back toward the reef, his body moving on instinct even as his mind lingered there, in the forest.

but tomorrow, he knew, he would be back here again.

1033 HOURS — RDA SCIENCE COMPLE just don't think about him. don't think about anything at all and everything will be fine.

that had been your mantra for the past few weeks. not that it was working, considering you could feel your head getting bigger with each passing day. besides you, there were only three other people who could read the guilt written all over your face.

the first was your mother, obviously.

and the other two: Jesse Calder and Anya Reyes.

Jesse and Anya had been your closest friends since your very first day on Pandora. with them, things felt lighter. they were the only ones who made everything feel right. normal. 

you lied to everyone around you, but you couldn't lie to them. and it had already been three weeks of lying even to yourself, so the obvious solution was to avoid them.

but now, there was nowhere left to run.

you took a breath and opened the door, stepping into the lab, knowing you couldn’t come up with another excuse to avoid facing your friends. this time, though, the sight waiting for you was different.

in the corner of the lab, you could see Stella lying on the gurney. needles were still inserted in her arm, and from the color of the fluid you knew it was post-treatment. Anya stood beside her, eyes fixed on the monitors, making sure everything was running as it should.

feeling your face burning, your gaze landed on the likely mastermind behind the whole plan. Jesse was watching you from behind his glasses, sitting in his chair with that triumphant smile you could recognize anywhere.

you stopped in the doorway. ‘’you planned this.’’

“technically,” he said, “we just took responsibility for her treatment today. your mom is stuck in meetings with the science department all day. we figured you’d want to be here.”

“schedule change.” Anya added innocently, though the small smile on her lips gave her away completely.

“schedule change.” you repeated, not believing it for a second.

“pure coincidence.” Jesse confirmed, his grin widening. “now, you can keep standing there in the doorway, or you can come in and finally tell us what the hell has been going on with you.”

you looked between the two of them, then back at Stella. since the last treatment, two weeks ago, this one had been noticeably less aggressive. but she was still asleep. 

with a quiet sigh of defeat, you stepped fully inside and closed the door behind you.

“lock the door.” you said, walking toward the link table.

Jesse blinked, his smile faltering. “what?”

“you want to know what happened, don’t you?”

Anya and Jesse exchanged a glance, and you caught the exact moment the playful glint on their faces shifted into real concern. Jesse stood and activated the privacy seal. the door clicked softly, a red light glowing on the panel. that happened more often than it should.

you’d been avoiding your check-ups for weeks, knowing they meant spending more time with them than you could afford while lying. for a few brief seconds, as you lay down on the link table, your eyes stayed fixed on the ceiling while Jesse moved closer to adjust the neural sensors at your temples.

the room was quiet, save for the low hum of the equipment and the soft beeping of Stella’s monitors.

you could feel the unease sitting just beneath your skin. it hadn't felt unfamiliar since three weeks ago, since the moment your eyes had landed on Neteyam.

that was his name.

it was the first thing you discovered when you returned to the base that day. you’d slipped through the corridors until you managed to access the identification files and training footage. Jake Sully was a huge topic among your people. it hadn't been hard to find information about his family.

Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk’itan.

the eldest son of Jake Sully and Neytiri.

there weren't many records of him. you found only one clear piece of footage from Quaritch's team camera. he looked younger, smaller. after that, just brief flashes captured during attacks on the cargo trains, quick frames of movement and drawn bows before the cameras cut out or shook too violently to see anything clearly.

nothing showed his face the way you'd seen it.

then you'd cleared your history and walked away. 

you didn't need the footage anymore. every detail was already burned into your memory.

“your patterns are a mess,” Jesse pulled you back to reality. he wasn’t looking at you, his eyes fixed on the monitors. “seriously, what have you been doing? because you’ve been on rest for days, but your brain is running like you’ve been sprinting for hours.”

"just tired." you mumbled.

you knew he wouldn't buy it.

“uh-huh.” he finished adjusting the sensors and spun his chair to face you, sharp eyes behind his glasses. “try again. and this time without lying, because i can literally see when you do.”

“Jesse—”

“oh. now this is getting interesting. you only use that tone when you're hiding something big." he leaned forward.

Anya approached, leaving Stella's monitors momentarily to pull up a stool near you. "we're worried," her voice was gentle but firm. "actually worried. you've been avoiding us for three weeks. three. you skipped six neural link checkups, canceled four lunches, and literally hid in the supply closet when Jesse tried to find you on thursday."

“i wasn’t hiding—”

“Daniels saw you,” Anya cut in, holding back a smile. “he thought it was hilarious. told half the lab.”

you rolled your eyes. of course he did.

the weight of it all pressed down on you. the three weeks of carrying this alone hitting. your eyes drifted to Stella, making sure she was still asleep. the monitor's steady beep felt too loud in the silence.

"okay," you finally said, your voice quieter than intended. "you win."

Jesse crossed his arms. "why are you avoiding us?"

"i'm not—"

"lying. again."

"you know me too well," you admitted. "i knew you two would notice. that you'd ask questions. and i..." your voice faltered. "i wouldn't know how to answer... i guess I still don't."

“notice what?” Anya asked, though her tone made it clear she already suspected the answer.

your gaze drifted between the two of them, a familiar weight settling in your chest. guilt crept in for shutting them out when they were the closest thing you had to family. you’d grown up side by side over the past few years, on a planet none of you had truly chosen.

Jesse, all sarcasm and sharp humor, his loyalty always hidden beneath jokes. Anya, openly fascinated by Pandora, her quiet kindness reinforced by a core of steel.

if you couldn’t trust them, then there was no one you could.

“okay…” Jesse said, arms crossed over the backrest. “what the hell happened?”

taking a deep breath, you couldn’t stop but glance at Stella once more. your stomach twisted at the thought of anyone beyond them knowing what had been going through your head.

"you remember that patrol i did? the cargo train attack three weeks ago. you disconnected me earlier than scheduled."

"how could we forget?" Jesse grumbled. "this place has been hell for days. Dr. Parker still hasn't come back and i'm going bald by the way."

“you said you’d done a routine patrol and came back after the train incident,” Anya added carefully. from the look on her face, you could tell she was already putting the pieces together. “we thought maybe, just maybe, you were finally following the recommended hours in the link.”

‘’we didn’t.’’

you couldn't hold back a laugh. of course they knew. you rarely spent less than sixty hours a week in the avatar, well above the recommended forty. they'd given up trying to change that after your avatar project was finalized and approved for extended use.

‘’i may… have left some things out.’’

"i know," Jesse responded immediately. "your patterns were crazy. but you never lie in debriefings. like, never. so i let it slide." he shot a quick look at Anya, then paused, his eyes narrowing slightly as he studied you. "now i'm regretting that because the curiosity is killing me."

you sat up fully, rubbing your face with your hands. Jesse gave you a sharp glare when a few of the sensor wires tugged loose with the movement.

“i…” the words felt heavy, hard to shape. how did you explain something you didn’t fully understand yourself? “i should’ve had two confirmed kills that day. i encountered two Omaticaya.”

“and?” Jesse pressed, Anya didn’t scold him this time, she looked just as curious.

"i recognized one of their footprints first," your eyes lifted to their faces, voice low. neither of them blinked. "it had five fingers."

“holy shit.” Jesse breathed.

“Jesus.” Anya whispered at the same time, her hands flying to her mouth.

that was enough information for them to understand. since arriving as teenagers, the three of you had heard people talking about it. except for the avatars created on the base itself, the only Na'vi on Pandora who exhibited that hybrid trait were Jake Sully's children.

"i couldn't report it. it felt wrong. i had this strange feeling..." your voice faltered at first. "i felt like i shouldn't make him a target, so i didn't report that he was there." more firmly this time, you continued.

‘’you what?" Anya asked, her usually gentle tone showing a hint of disbelief.

“i know, i know,” you said defensively because that wasn’t even the worst part. “but that’s not the worst part…”

"of course it's not..." Jesse muttered, sighing deeply. Anya elbowed him without taking her eyes off your face.

"after... after covering some of his tracks to throw them off," you started, raising a finger when both their mouths opened in perfect circles. "i know, just—listen. i saw him... and i know how this sounds but…’’ 

you paused, the memory flooding back. standing in the forest, finger on the trigger, looking at a reflection of yourself on the other side of the war.

"he looked so young. he looked like... like me." your voice dropped. "and i had a gun, he only had a knife… wouldn't have stood a chance. it didn't feel right. so i let him go."

the silence that followed was absolute.

you knew they wouldn’t judge you, they never would. still, it felt like too much even for you to say out loud, let alone for them to process.

taking advantage of their stunned silence, you continued quickly. "the attack happened a few minutes later. i knew he was probably involved..." you took a deep breath. ‘’but he showed up again, this time with another one. i swear i have no idea where they came from, but suddenly they were there, running straight into the crossfire."

with every word, Anya and Jesse looked more incredulous, their expressions shifting in sync.

“my God.” Anya said softly, hands still pressed to her mouth. “we should be grateful you’re still here.”

"what? we should be—" Jesse started, then caught the look both of you were giving him. "okay, okay. grateful. right. continue."

“that’s not all…” you interruped, both of them turned back to you instantly, disbelief written all over their faces. “that day i wasn’t really sure, but i assumed they were brothers. when the second one appeared, he immediately stepped in front but he only had four fingers. that’s when I got confused—”

Jesse cut in, his voice dripping with ironic skepticism. “the Sully kids can take after either parent, you know. daddy's human genes or mommy's—" he paused for effect, "—the terrifyingly lethal Na'vi warrior genes."

Anya elbowed him again, harder this time.

“what? i’m just saying.”

“shut up.”

"anyway." you continued, a small smile escaping. "i was with Davies as backup, most of the team went after the train. and then—they were right there. practically in front of me." you could still feel it, your finger resting on the trigger. "i could've taken them both down.’’ 

you swallowed hard.

"i don't know what i was thinking." that was a lie, and you all knew it. "but i couldn't let them die like that. not without a fighting chance. so i covered their escape. confused Davies long enough for them to get away."

you finished with a long breath leaving your lips, relieved and exhausted at the same time.

after a few seconds of heavy silence, Jesse leaned back in his chair, letting out a low whistle. "okay. okay, that's... wow. that's straight-up betraying. like, actual betrayal. execution without trial. all that horrible stuff. "

"i know."

"and you did it anyway?"

"yeah."

"why?" Anya asked, and there was no judgment in her voice. you recognized that genuine curiosity, that almost scientific need to understand.

that question had been haunting you for the past few weeks. you knew that if they discovered what had happened, you'd face consequences — suspension from the field, maybe even being sent back to Earth. for all the small acts of rebellion against the RDA, you’d never crossed a line like this before. Stella was the investment; you were just the backup. you had to proved your worth every single day just to stay.

and you’d almost thrown it all away for a moment of mercy.

"he would've died for his brother.’’ you finally said, voice quiet. ‘’and i couldn't—i wouldn't be that cruel... if it had been me and Stella, i would've wanted someone to show us that mercy."

your eyes drifted to your sister again. the thought of her in that kind of danger made your stomach twist. 

then Anya moved closer, sitting on the edge of the link table beside you. 

“what was he like?” you looked at her. “no, really. tell me. i want to know.” that familiar spark was in her eyes, that hunger for stories from a world she rarely got to see firsthand. you wished you were half as lucky.

Anya was a quiet prodigy. at nineteen, she was already a junior scientist, a natural among the researchers. her parents had joined the scientific crew around the same time as your mother and Jesse’s.

she lived through your stories. and Jesse — who always said he “liked his body exactly the way it was and planned to keep it intact, thank you very much” — stayed on base mostly to keep her company.

you closed your eyes, and he was there. like he'd been every night for three weeks.

“tall… obviously.” you said with a soft laugh. “broad shoulders. warrior build.” you let out a small, involuntary breath. “but his eyes… amber, but—intense. different from any other Na'vi i've seen.”

“you like him,” Jesse said, watching your expression closely.

it wasn't exactly a question, but it wasn't an accusation either. it seemed like just an observation.

your eyes flew to his face. "i don't even know him—"

“and apparently, you don’t need to.” he glanced briefly at Stella's monitors, checking her readings out of habit, before turning back to you. “i’ve been monitoring neural links for almost three years. i know how to recognize when someone forms a strong attachment to something. whether it's a memory or a person." "it just means you think about him." Anya added softly, her hands holding yours. "and that there's something there that caught your attention in a way nothing else on this entire moon has in three years."

your mouth opened and closed a few times. you couldn’t deny it. not to them.

"it's dangerous," Anya continued. "but it's not wrong. Pandora has a way of... bringing together the things that should be together. even when it makes no sense."

“especially when it makes no sense,” Jesse muttered, his sarcasm returning. then he leaned forward, serious again. “but really, if anyone finds out what you did—”

"no one's going to find out." you interrupted with a conviction you didn't know you had. "the only ones who know are you two and them. and i believe they're not exactly eager to come here and report that they were saved by someone from this place."

you could feel the concern emanating from both of them. being the only one of the three who worked regularly in the field, your life was something they valued and fiercely protected. and despite feeling protective of them, you had the strange sensation that you were the one being protected.

"you've got a point there..." Jesse drummed his fingers on the back of the chair, thinking.

your back leaned against the link table again, and you let out another one of those tired sighs that seemed endless lately.

"we came here without a choice, became part of this place without a choice. but when I looked at him..." you paused, searching for the right words. "i felt like that was mine. a choice i made."

almost a whisper.

Anya squeezed your hand. "it was a good choice."

"insane choice." Jesse corrected, but you could hear his smile. "but a good one. definitely good."

you couldn't help but crack a smile, your head turning to the side to look at the most trustworthy people you knew. "you two are impossible."

"impossibly loyal." Jesse shot back. "impossibly curious. impossibly fucked if anyone finds out we know about this." he shrugged. "but when has that ever been news?"

"what's his name?" Anya asked. of the three of you, she was definitely the dreamer. "did you find out?"

"of course she did." Jesse answered for you, rolling his eyes. "it was probably the first thing she did when she got back."

you felt your face heat up slightly because he was right.

"Neteyam." you said. 

it was the first time you’d spoken his name out loud. it sounded different that way.

"his name is Neteyam," you repeated, softer.

"oh, of course." Jesse sighed, throwing his head back dramatically. ‘’it couldn’t just be some random warrior dude. had to be Jake Sully’s oldest son.”

your eyes rolled. you knew that despite it being your best friend's sarcastic way, it was still true. Neteyam wasn't just Na'vi, which by itself was bad. he was Jake Sully's eldest son.

your expression must’ve shifted, because Anya squeezed your hand again, drawing your attention to her caring face. in your human body, you were shorter than her but since you spent so much time in your Avatar, you kept forgetting that.

"look... saving their lives instead of killing them... i understand why you did it." Anya said gently. "but it's dangerous. and you've been going out on patrol near the border a lot lately. three times this week."

you didn't argue back like you usually would. after the ambush, it was very likely they’d checked your schedule.

"be careful." she continued, voice soft but serious. "with him. with yourself. with all of this."

"i know."

after seconds of exchanged glances, relief rising in your chest, Jesse stood up.

"okay. this stays between the three of us. blood pact, cone of silence, all that jazz."

"all that jazz?" Anya repeated, the two of you exchanging amused looks.

"i watch a lot of old Earth movies, leave me alone." he said defensively but with a smile on his lips.

it felt good to speak honestly with someone other than your own head.

"now get out of there before you destroy my sensors." Jesse complained, still smiling.

you stood up, and for the first time in weeks, felt the weight lighten. and even though, in that exact moment you felt less lonely than you had in a long time, your focus wasn't where it should be. 

on the pair of attentive eyes in the corner of the room, listening carefully to every word.

and planning your freedom.

at any cost.

1523 HOURS — FOREST PERIMETER NEUTRAL ZONE

the weight of your actions felt lighter after sharing them with the people you spent most of your time with. despite Jesse's relentless teasing and Anya's constant romanticism, there was something almost... normal about it. fun, even. 

naturally, that sense of normalcy never lasted long. all it took was a glance in the mirror. your blue skin was a constant reminder of who you were. in those moments, there was only one place where you could find a bit of peace.

away from your friends' laughter and your mother's suffocating gaze, as if she already knew you were hiding something.

to the west of the base, hidden among rusted machines and deactivated structures, there was a passage underneath the framework. an uncomfortable climb through loose rocks and corroded metal, too tight for your avatar body, leading to nothing but a massive wall.

a physical barrier between the RDA and Pandora.

that place was a secret between you and your friends. you’d sit there, wedged between worlds — just as you always felt — talking about everything. from the movies you smuggled from new shipments arriving from Earth to the question none of you really had the courage to answer:

would we ever have the courage to cross to the other side of the wall?

you sat on the uneven surface, the warm sun covering your face and the breeze making strands of your hair fly, feeling at peace for the first time in weeks.

maybe they were right. maybe you could make peace with that curiosity you carried about Pandora, about…

"Neteyam."

the name escaped before you could stop it. you flinched at the sound of your own voice.

it wasn't the first time. you'd been testing it, saying it out loud when no one could hear. trying to make it feel less dangerous, less real.

it never worked.

you would never be able to call him, but you could imagine what it would feel like if you could.

i’m losing my mind. you thought, silently admitting what Jesse had pointed out more than once.

your feet swung suspended in the air, following the gentle rhythm of the breeze. then the sudden sound of movement in the florest shattered the calm. your hand flew instinctively to your waist, where you always carried a knife tucked in your shorts.

but almost immediately you let your shoulders relax when you spotted the source of the sound.

it was just a hexapede. small, probably young considering its size.

you had an unconscious habit of comparing most animals, places, and things on Pandora to what you knew from Earth. a hexapede was like a deer. this one, in particular, wore the unmistakable look of a deer caught in headlights.

the noise it had made came from a thick vine tangled around it. its left hind leg was caught and it was pulling desperately in an attempt to escape.

you watched it from a distance. it would free itself eventually or it wouldn’t. either way, that was nature’s law. but you were there, standing just a few meters away.

and you’d already helped other living beings far more problematic recently.

so before you'd fully decided, you were already moving. jumping down to the other side of the wall. it was forbidden to be there, but breaking rules wasn't exactly new to you. still, you felt your heart pounding as you approached the blue creature in front of you.

it let out sharp, panicked sounds, desperate to get away from you with everything it had. your heart softened for the small animal. it was just as scared as you were to be there.

it was one of the few moments where the choice felt entirely yours. to do something good for that planet.

after carefully cutting away the tangled vines, the animal’s leg came free. you barely had time to really see it. it was already running at full speed, without hesitation. without looking back. 

you let out a quiet laugh, something bitter mixing with the amusement. envy of a hexapede. of its freedom to just... belong somewhere.

a freedom you would never have.

you watched it disappear, never glancing back. and you knew you shouldn’t, knew this was reckless even by your standards. but something primitive and irrational took over and without looking back, you followed.

Pandora had this fascinating and terrifying characteristic: if you put your hands on the right leaves, you’d see the most beautiful bioluminescent flowers light up before your eyes. or you could lose a finger for mistaking a plant for a predator. a forbidden part of you loved that place.

you didn’t care how far you were going. your feet kept carrying you forward, each step deeper into the forest. no one would look for you for at least another hour; you could enjoy your false freedom for a while.

the forest was enchantingly deadly, but it had never truly hurt you. you moved through dense foliage, and the small animals you observed along the way. you’d completely lost any sense of distance from the base by then. that deep into the forest, you might even run into other field teams if you kept going.

but then through your boot, you felt something that wasn’t leaves or soil.

spent bullet casings.

several of them were scattered across the ground, half-buried in moss and dirt. your eyes lifted, carefully observing your surroundings. a feeling of recognition filled your chest. you’d been here weeks before, saving the life of exactly who dominated your thoughts.

"of course," you whispered, something between a laugh and disbelief escaping. 

maybe Anya was right. maybe Pandora really did have a way of bringing the right things to the right places.

you looked at the sky above, distracted and unfocused on the living beings around you. but that planet demanded constant attention. one small mistake was all it took.

and it was the sound, very close, that reminded you of that. you heard it before you saw it. heavy footsteps. something big.

you turned slowly, your heart already racing before your eyes could register it. and when they did, all the air left your lungs at once.

Thanator.

the creature was less than twenty meters away. massive, all muscle and armored black skin, six legs built for killing. its eyes weren't fixed on you yet, it hadn't noticed your presence.

yet.

you had seconds. maybe less.

what the…

there wasn’t time for a rational reaction. your feet simply started running, trying to dodge all the branches and leaves coming at your face. vision blurred by speed and panic. your mind couldn't map the path ahead, but you didn’t dare look back even for a second to know where exactly the creature was.

you only knew two things. thanators were fast and you didn’t stand a chance against one.

in a desperate attempt at survival, you stopped for a fraction of a second, scanning around you as quickly as possible looking for an escape route. hearing the noise behind you getting dangerously loud, you threw yourself between low branches and large tree roots that formed something like a small cave.

you prayed your scent would fade with whatever lingered there already, forcing yourself to stay as still as possible while your heart hammered so violently you were sure it could track you by the sound alone.

this was the stupidest decision I’ve made in years. you thought as you curled up in the dense, suffocating silence.

you couldn’t tell if ten minutes or an hour had passed. but eventually, you knew it was time to leave your improvised hiding spot. face whatever was out there. even if all you had was a knife.

slowly, you made your way out, muscles protesting from being in the same tense position for so long. the forest felt... different. calmer. as if something had shifted while you hid.

your eyes swept the area, searching for any sign of the thanator. but what caught your attention was something else entirely.

right in the center of the open clearing ahead, there was a figure. your eyes almost looked away, the natural Na’vi camouflage, blue skin blending with shadows and filtered light.

but they came back. and focused.

your heart, which had just started to calm, kicked into a different kind of racing.

he had his back to you, hand resting on an ikran’s neck, the large and imposing animal looking restless.

but you knew who it was.

Neteyam.

“you make a lot of noise when you run.” his voice cut through the silence. it was exactly as you remembered. thick with accent yet still clear, deep.

you were internally grateful he had his back turned, because you definitely blinked far too many times to make sure you weren’t hallucinating that you felt your eyes go dry.

maybe you took too long to respond, because he turned around. his hand still resting on the ikran, but his body completely facing your direction now.

his eyes fixed on you.

“that wasn’t exactly my main concern.” you finally managed to say, forcing out the voice that seemed to have gotten stuck.

he didn’t answer. just kept staring.

you felt yourself burn under his gaze. they were as intense as you remembered, and it was the first time you felt truly exposed to someone. as if he could see through you, ignoring all the layers and going straight to who you really were.

as if he could hear every thought passing through your head.

including how fast your heart was beating at that exact moment.

you looked back at him. allowing yourself to really look for the first time, without the immediate threat of death hanging over you. he wore different accessories than weeks ago, a new piece across his forehead, looping around his ears. his braids hung loose. tall, broad-shouldered, that warrior's posture even while relaxed.

and now, beneath the forest’s filtered light. without the pressure of a weapon trained on him…

he was even more handsome than you remembered.

you forced the thought down.

focus.

what was he doing around here? alone?

the area was relatively far from the base, it was the closest to the forest exit but still had heavy circulation of soldier patrols through that region. and to your eyes, he looked far too  focused fpr someone merely passing through.

maybe he was hunting…

but you saw no prey with him. no hunt tied to the ikran.

maybe he was here for… another reason.

“you shouldn’t be here.”

the sentence fell simply. direct. and it was enough to completely interrupt whatever dangerous conclusion you'd been forming.

the irony wasn't lost on you. he was just as deep in RDA territory as you were in his.

“do you hunt here?” you asked, deliberately ignoring the statement he’d made.

“no.”

you got the sense that was all you were going to get from him. and somehow, it felt like enough.

when you opened your mouth to reply — to argue, to question, to say something — he was already turning away. forming the tsaheylu with his ikran in one fluid motion, intimate and instinctive. 

“you should go back.”

it wasn’t an order. it sounded like a fact.

Neteyam mounted the ikran with the same natural ease as breathing. you recognized the image, you’d seen him do it before in archived footage. but here, right in front of you, he looked like…

a mighty warrior.

and you found yourself genuinely worried that you might never get over the “crush” Jesse had named with so much matter-of-factly.

before leaving, he cast one last glance your way, too quick for you to read whatever crossed his mind.

“there are some of yours a few kilometers from here.” he said. “southeast.”

there was no time to respond.

by the time you parted your lips to ask how he knew, why he was warning you, anything at all, the ikran was already lifting off. strong wings beating, creating wind that made your hair fly.

for a few seconds you stood there, feeling strangely… foolish. indignation crept in, your mouth pressing into a thin line in pure disbelief at the previous seconds.

two sentences.

that was all you’d managed to say.

“idiot.” you muttered to yourself, watching him disappear into the sky. you didn’t know if you were talking about him or yourself. “you’re the one who should be worried. there are patrols everywhere—”

you took a deep breath. standing there, arguing with open air like a madwoman wasn’t going to help. you needed to get back to the base before someone noticed you were gone. 

once the ikran vanished from sight, you turned on your heels and started the way back. but a part of you, small but impossible to ignore, stayed behind in that clearing, and you didn’t know if you’d be able to get it back.

and it stayed with the question you hadn’t asked but that burned in your throat.

why were you here? really?

and with the answer you feared more than anything. that maybe, just maybe, he was looking for the same thing you were.

during the walk back, stepping on the same tracks you’d left on the way there, your brain finally processed something that had gone unnoticed in the moment.

what bothered you most wasn’t what he had said. or what he hadn’t said.

it was that he didn’t seem surprised to see you. no shock in those amber eyes when he turned around. no hesitation. no confusion about why an RDA avatar would be alone, unarmed, kilometers deep into territory.

as if he already knew you would be there. and that, more than anything else, made your heart race in a way no thanator ever could.

1800 HOURS — TRAINING FACILITY you didn't recognize yourself anymore.

days had passed since the forest. since him. and you still couldn't stop replaying every second. the way he hadn't seemed surprised to see you.

and logically, the only way you could bring things back to something resembling normal was by silencing the voice that kept pulling you toward the paths Pandora seemed determined to show you.

after telling Anya and Jesse what happened in the forest — and watching them both conclude that Neteyam had come looking for you, because none of it made rational sense otherwise — you made a decision.

"i don't know," you said, staring at the ceiling of the room. "it feels like... something happend between us."

Jesse arched an eyebrow from the other bunk. "something is dangerously vague."

"i know." you murmured, turning on your side to face them. "maybe it's nothing. maybe it's all in my head."

Anya was sitting on the floor, her back against the bed. she didn’t say anything right away. Jesse was lying facing you, head propped on his hand, watching you.

"it doesn't make sense," you continued, connecting pieces out loud. "he shouldn't have been there. that area has aerial trackers. Na'vi hunts don't come that close to the base. it would've been... too complicated."

“complicated, yes.” Jesse agreed. “apparently not impossible.”

“exactly.” you said, wincing back when the words came out louder than you meant. “but we can't just jump to conclusions about someone we don't even know."

exhausted from the thoughts consuming you, you waited for one of them to agree but when you looked at Anya’s expression, she seemed thoughtful.

“or we can.” she said calmly. “if you consider that Eywa does that. puts people where they need to be.”

you let out a short laugh. “Anya, please.”

“i’m serious.” she insisted. “a thanator showing up right there, right when you were alone? and him appearing right after?" she shook her head. "that's not coincidence."

"i'm glad to know that she's trying to kill me... thanks." you murmured.

"okay, pause." Jesse said, lifting his hands. "are you suggesting that he stayed hidden in the forest, dodging drones, patrols, and sensors… for her?"

Anya didn't hesitate. "yes."

the room fell silent for a second.

"that's..." Jesse started, then stopped. looked at you. looked back at Anya. "that's insane."

"i'm right here, you know?" you interrupted. "and this still isn't rational."

"not everything needs to be," Anya said, that small smile still on her face.

"and you know what? his father literally switched sides in a war for love. betrayed his entire species." he shook his head in disbelief. "that family has a history of making completely irrational decisions based on feelings. so yeah, him risking his life to see you? totally on brand."

you took a deep breath, going back to staring at the ceiling of the bed above yours.

"it doesn't matter anyway. whatever it is, it doesn't change anything."

the two of them watched you for a long period.

"great." Jesse muttered. "this place also loves creating existential crises in armed young people."

you heard him grumble something else, probably directed at Anya. then came the sound of a long sigh.

"so we're left with two options."

you raised an eyebrow. "which are?"

"maybe this is all a coincidence." you could see from the corner of your eye that he made air quotes. "or you two are terrible at ignoring obvious signs."

"i vote coincidence," you answered too quickly.

Anya’s laughter echoed through the room.

“of course you do.”

after that night, you decided to put a definitive end to the story. deep down, you knew Jesse was right, you would be risking everything for something you wouldn’t even know how to name if someone asked.

your patrols stayed as far away from the forest as possible. when in doubt — not completely trusting yourself anymore — you rarely agreed to sit at your secret spot. you opted for the familiar safety of your bedroom door.

and as the days passed, you could begin to feel things settling back to normal. slowly, Neteyam started to feel like a distant memory. 

at least, that was what you liked to tell yourself.

the water in the training pool was freezing at the start of the evening, but your body barely felt it anymore. your avatar hadn't been designed for swimming, built for climbing, running, the forest. but you pushed it anyway, three hours of diving and surfacing until your muscles screamed. swimming was the only training you truly enjoyed.

you surfaced for the tenth or maybe twentieth time, pulling air into your lungs while holding onto the edge. a small smile appeared on your face because with each training session you were getting better at the time you spent submerged.

the pool was empty except for you. most people only used it when they absolutely had to. that part of the base had been built for training, with the intention of expanding missions closer to the reef people. but while it was still a developing project, it gave you silence.

you could pretend everything was under control.

"you know you need oxygen to live, right?"

you turned your head. Jesse was sitting in the bleachers, tablet on his lap, Anya beside him with two cups. your face lit up at seeing them.

"it's six o'clock," you said, still holding the edge. "what are you doing here?"

"and you've been here since three," Jesse replied back. "we monitored your entry in the system."

"stalkers."

"i'd say... concerned friends," he corrected. "there's a difference."

laughing, you pulled yourself out of the pool, grabbing the towel you'd left at the edge. in your Avatar form, you towered over them. "i'm fine."

"of course you are," Anya responded, extending one of the cups. "that's why you've been swimming for three hours straight like you're running from a shark."

you accepted the juice. "there are no sharks here." you shot back with a laugh when she stuck her tongue out at you.

the three of you stayed silent for a moment. you were drying your long hair, feeling your body make a puddle on the floor while listening to their whispers behind your back. they seemed to be arguing, clearly wanting to say something but not knowing how to start.

"guys, just say it." you finally said with a small laugh, tired of waiting. "you're terrible at hiding things." your smile faded when you turned and saw their faces.

“we were coming back from the lab last night…” Jesse began, his voice steady. “and we saw your mother talking to Stella,” 

"it looked... intense," Anya added quietly.

your brow furrowed as your gaze shifted between them, reading their expressions. “what do you mean, intense?”

“like… Stella looked like she was crying.” Jesse said, rubbing the back of his neck. “we were going to tell you right away, but then we got caught up with that emergency maintenance on the link systems, and you went out on field, and—”

he stopped.

it felt like something cold slid down your spine. “and what?”

"your mother asked us to call you," Anya answered quietly. "asked if we'd seen you. or Stella."

you started organizing your mind while returning the cup to Anya. Stella seemed fine lately. happy, even. your mother continued busy as always, but you were... fine. normal.

why would they be fighting?

usually, arguments came from the fact that Stella was young. at a complicated age, with even more complicated doubts. you could never blame her. it was already hard enough for you, being older. with invasive medical treatment and at that age, it must have been impossible.

“let’s go,” you said as you pulled a jacket over your wet clothes. “they probably just argued about the treatment again. you know how Stella gets—"

you were talking too fast. trying to convince yourself. Jesse and Anya didn't argue.

as you walked toward the lab where they worked a knot formed in your stomach. your mother was rarely away from the main lab. maybe they thought they were being discreet, but you noticed the looks they exchanged when they thought you weren’t watching, the tense shoulders, the way their steps slowed.

it made your stomach drop.

they weren't telling you everything.

you were certain of it when you reached the lab base. it was usually a busy place, full of avatars in maintenance and checkups, scientists everywhere. the second you opened the door, the place was empty, silent. 

despite the hesitation curling in your gut, you stepped inside, searching for your mother. she was standing in front of the room’s command center, where they could visualize Pandora’s complete geography in holographic projection. beside her, she had pulled an auxiliary table. it was covered with materials.

when you got closer and really focused on what she was looking at, you realized they were Stella’s belongings. her notebooks, recording tablet, notes.

your mother didn’t look toward you when you entered. with every step closer, you felt yourself growing short of breath, nervous.

“mom?”

she turned and you realized she was so concentrated she hadn’t heard you. the exhaustion showed immediately. that jaw muscle that normally locked when she was under extreme pressure was apparent. beyond that, her expression gave nothing away.

her eyes observed you from top to bottom and you saw in her eyes, in the exact moment her jaw loosened, the instant she processed that you didn’t know yet. whatever it was.

“where’s Stella?” you asked, though part of you already knew.. 

your mother took a deep breath, her shoulders dropped.

"i don't know." a pause. "she disappeared. about eight hours ago."

it was like the ground started disappearing from under your feet.

“what?”

“she left during the shift change,” Anya explained, her voice careful, as if delivering the worst news of your life, and in that moment, it felt like it was. “in the avatar. nobody saw her go, but we checked the security cameras and—”

“show me.”

Jesse already had the tablet ready, turning it so you could look at the image. it was security footage, black and white, timestamp marking 10:20 that morning. Stella in her avatar, walking toward the west gate. as if she knew exactly what she was doing.

“she planned this,” you murmured, more to yourself than to them. how could you not notice?

“seems like it,” Jesse agreed quietly.

your mind was racing, felt like it was close to breaking down. eight hours. Stella had been out there for eight hours, alone, on Pandora, with no real survival training.

“there’s more,” Anya said, interrupting your thoughts, her voice breaking slightly. “she's been asking me things. over the last few weeks.” she admitted, looking ashamed. “about the clans. where they were. i thought—i thought she was just curious, so i showed her maps, explained—"

her voice cracked.

"i'm so sorry."

“you couldn’t have known,” you said softly, because it was true.

Stella had planned carefully. asked the right questions, at the right times, to the right people. your sister was many things, but stupid wasn’t one of them.

your mother nodded, looking back to the equipment spread across the table. “we don’t have much time. we need to go through what she left behind, figure out exactly where she was going”

you starter to splitting up, checking different things. you picked up the notebook your mother had found. Stella loved drawing, most pages were sketches of Pandora, small phrases, observations. then, about a month and a half ago, the drawings stopped.

names started appearing instead.

your hands went cold.

file names. ones you recognized because you'd pulled up the exact same files weeks ago.

with trembling fingers, you typed the first name into the monitor. Jake Sully's face filled the screen. young, human, in his wheelchair.

the same footage you'd watched. the same search history. she'd been following your tracks.

some videos passed before you felt your mother approaching, looking at the screen. when your eyes met, you knew instantly.

“you know, don’t you?”

your mother looked at you, like she'd never looked at your avatar before.

"that you're a good person?" her voice softened. "i've always known."

that made your eyes burn. your mother cupped your face gently, her hand small in comparison to your face.

“she came to me two weeks ago. said she needed to tell me something important.” she paused. “and then she told me everything. she'd heard you talking with Jesse and Anya."

your heart stopped.

"apparently she wasn't as sedated as you all thought."

"this is my fault," you whispered.

“don’t eat yourself alive with guilt, dear. your sister made this choice. her way out."

"but if I hadn't—"

"she would've found another reason." your mother's eyes were steady. "you know her. once she decides something..."

then something clicked. 

"she knows, doesn't she?" your voice barely above a whisper. "about the treatment. where it really comes from."

your mother didn't answer immediately. that was your answer. 

"she's known for a while now. started asking questions months ago. about the compounds, the extraction process, where we sourced the materials." she met your eyes. "she's smart. connected the dots. and when she confronted me, i told her the truth."

the word echoed in your skull.

"she seemed happy," you whispered, pieces falling into place. "i thought she was getting better. but i didn't notice. i was so focused on—"

on proving yourself. on everything except your sister.

"she'd rather die," you said, voice breaking, "than keep taking it."

"yes." your mother's voice cracked. "she made that very clear."

you turned your eyes back to the screen. Jake Sully and Stella shared a fascination with Pandora, but what was she looking for in his human recordings? what was there that wasn’t in your recordings as Na’vi?

you spun the chair to turn back to your mother who was leaning against the counter, watching you closely. “i’m going after her.”

“i know,” she said, simply. “i would too. if i had an avatar like yours, i'd already be gone.”

that honesty surprised you. even as a child while your father was alive, she was the most logical person in the house, always with the right answers. at that moment you expected resistance, expected logical arguments about why it was a terrible idea.

“you’re not going to try to stop me?”

it had been years since you were a child. but in that second, you felt like one.

“i would, if I thought it would work. but obedience has never been your strength.” she paused, studying you. “and frankly, you’re the only person with a real chance of finding her.”

you blinked rapidly, stunned. "so...you agree?"

"i didn't say that." your mother tilted her head slightly. "i said i understand. there's a difference." she paused. "do you have any plan beyond 'running through the forest hoping to stumble into her'?"

there it was. that sharp, logical question that forced you to think.

"she researched the clans," you began, thinking through everything you'd seen. "about Jake Sully." You continued, pointing to the monitor behind you. "she probably headed toward—"

"the Metkayina, at the reef," your mother finished.

you stared at her.

“the Metkayina are different from the Omatikaya. Jake Sully brought the war to them, but they’re in a region with far less active military presence. more… isolated.”

she paused, making sure you were processing.

“if Stella managed to reach them alive, there's a reasonable chance they helped her. or at least didn't kill her immediately, it's not part of their culture." she started walking back to the command center, you followed, watching where she pointed. then she stopped, her eyes returned to your face. "but we need to consider all possibilities, including that..."

"that the Sullys will be there," you completed, understanding the implication perfectly. "i know."

your mother studied you for a long moment. you stood nearly eight feet tall but felt so small beside her.

"and is that a problem?" she asked calmly.

you looked away. that was why you were in this mess. because your focus had been on him when it should have been on your duties.

"i don't know," you admitted in a whisper.

"honesty." your mother nodded, surprisingly approving. "good. you're going to need that where you're going. the Na'vi don't have a specific word for lying."

she stepped away, moving toward a locked cabinet. she pulled out a physical map and spread it across the counter, her fingers tracing coordinates.

"here," she said, pointing. your eyes followed to the marked location. "Metkayina territory. near the main reef. if she went there, this is the most logical route."

she looked at you, expression serious.

"but you can't just walk there. it would take days on foot, passing through extremely hostile territory. you need transport. a clean exit that won't be tracked immediately."

on the other side of the lab, Anya and Jesse reviewed security footage. after a few minutes, they concluded that during the shift change, Stella had gained access to a helicopter. they went out to identify which one and how.

"and you need to come back." your mother interrupted, voice firmer now. "both of you need to. promise me that."

your eyes lifted from the map to the face of the same woman who had crossed galaxies for you. 

"i promise."

she looked at you with a loving smile. you were difficult to read behind all that pride, but you were hers. she knew how sensitive you were, and she'd let you have that. after all the duties you had accepted over the years, without hesitation, without fear, she had watched you become a slave to your own pride and honor.

"your father would've done the same thing. gone after her, no matter the risk."

the mention of your father hit different this time. softer. no matter how much time passed, his death wasn't comfortable to process. Pete, who had once been tall, strong, the most charming and intelligent man you knew, had slowly withered until he became small and died from the same disease Stella carried.

everyone knew why you all sacrificed so much.

none of you would subject yourselves to watching that happen again.

"you're just like him," your mother brought you back. "stubborn. brave." a pause. "stupid."

you laughed.

before you could respond, the lab door burst open. Jesse and Anya rushed in, looking breathless. and guilty.

"we..." Jesse started, hands on his knees as he raised a finger toward you, asking for a second to catch his breath. Anya beside him wasn't any better. "we might have... acquired... access to a helicopter."

you blinked, eyes widening. "what?"

"the small one," Anya explained between breaths. "the reconnaissance model. it's loaded, tank's full, and by an incredible coincidence," her eyes flicked to Jesse, "the tracking system has scheduled maintenance for the next... forty minutes."

"forty-five," Jesse corrected. "let's be accurate."

you looked between them, incredulous. this can’t get any better. "you stole a helicopter?"

"technically, we acquired temporary unauthorized access," Jesse responded, still somewhat breathless. "stealing is such an ugly word."

"you've lost your minds."

"yeah, well." Anya shrugged. "you coming or not?"

your eyes turned to your mother. she was staring at the three of you, mouth slightly open.

"we don't know how to fly," you started slowly.

"technical detail," Jesse dismissed with a wave of his hand.

"Jesse, that's not a technical detail, that's—"

"i'll fly."

everyone turned toward the sound of your mother's voice. she was standing straighter now, that determination you knew so well returning to her eyes. "let's go, we can't waste a second."

"Dr. Reeves—" Anya began.

"that's my daughter out there," your mother cut in. "and if you guys are thinking i'm staying here while you three attempt a suicidal rescue mission, you're very mistaken."

"mom—"

she raised her hand. "no discussion."

you didn't have time to argue. 

"my parents will hold them off as long as they can," Anya explained while you all collected the scattered information. "but we need to bring your body with us. they won't disconnect Stella, but you're our eyes in the field. without you here, we need to keep you safe."

your eyes went to the link pod. she was right. the logistics were brutal: you needed your avatar to survive out there. but if your human body stayed at the base, the RDA would just disconnect you, pull you back.

and that meant Jesse, Anya, and your mother — three scientists with no combat training — would be out there alone. vulnerable. waiting for you to come back.

"get to one of the mission containers in your avatar. lock yourself in, then disconnect," your mother instructed. "we'll get your human body out and bring the portable link capsule. you can reconnect once we're airborne."

you mentally thanked her brilliant mind.

you'd trained for moments like this. since only a few hours had passed since your sister disappeared, not everyone knew yet, and that was your advantage.

from the lab to the landing strip was only four minutes and thirty seconds. when you found the container your mother had indicated, you entered. locked it from the inside.

you lay down uncomfortably on the metal floor, activating the radio communicator. an instant later, your vision became darkness.

Jesse and Anya were already opening the pod, helping you out. your human body felt wrong. it always took a few minutes to adjust, you spent far more time in the borrowed blue than in your real skin.

Anya placed an air mask on your face.

"easy." she instructed.

you nodded, forcing your focus to return. you needed to get everyone out of there without raising alarms.

Jesse was already checking the corridors through a hacked camera on his tablet. "shift change in three minutes. two-minute-fifteen window to reach the hangar without crossing patrol."

"that's not a lot of time," Anya whispered.

"it's enough," you said, though your heart was pounding. "let's move."

you lined up. you at the front, Jesse and Anya behind, your mother bringing up the rear.

"you two should stay," your mother murmured as you advanced through the corridor. "i'm not explaining to your parents how we all came back on a one-way ship to Earth."

"with all due respect, Dr. Reeves," Jesse said, eyes still on the tablet. "you'll have to tie us down if you want that. we're in."

"Jesse—"

"Stella's is our friend too," Anya added firmly. for everything, there’s a first time, you thought. "and we've already hacked half the base's systems for this."

your mother opened her mouth, but you turned back, looking directly at her.

"mom, you can't do this alone. they can help," you whispered. "Stella's going to need medical care when we find her. Anya has training. and Jesse will make sure we don't get shot down. but more than that—" you met your mother's eyes. "when they realize what we've done, when they come looking you'll be alone with my body. you need them.’’

Jesse waved the tablet. "i can interfere with communications. buy us time."

your mother stared at you for a long moment, then sighed. you knew you'd won.

"fine. but you stay in the helicopter. don't get out. understood?"

"yes, ma'am," Anya and Jesse answered in unison.

you turned back, focusing on the corridor ahead.

0030 HOURS — HANGAR BAY 3 

the helicopter was exactly where Jesse said it would be.

used for short-range reconnaissance and with enough capacity to carry the improvised container strapped under the fuselage.

Anya and Jesse were discussing with your mother how to camouflage your exit so that by the time they noticed, it would be too late. once the portable link capsule was secured in the cargo hold, you climbed in, linked back to your avatar, now, back in blue skin, you were the last to board the main cabin.

your mother was in the pilot's seat, hands moving over the controls like she'd never stopped flying.

you stared. you didn't even know she could fly. your father had been the pilot. always.

Jesse and Anya settled into the back seats, squeezed between backpacks and equipment. a part of you wanted to say something. to ask if they were sure. to offer them a way out. but you already knew the answer.

they were there because they loved you. because all those conversations hadn’t just been theories.

behind you, base lights began turning on. voices crackled over the radio, demanding identification. your mother shut it off without hesitation

she looked at you, and for the first time in a long time, it felt like you were seeing your real mother. not the scientist. whenever you looked at her, there was an endless sadness the two of you shared. the torturous years before your father died and the moments between keeping your souls at peace and your sister alive. 

in that moment, even in your avatar body, you felt like her daughter again.

"come back to me," she said softly. And you nodded.

you flew in silence for hours, maybe more than you could count. time felt irrelevant. time felt irrelevant as the landscape below shifted from forest to coastline, from familiar to unknown.

you only spoke again when you knew you were getting close to the moment of goodbye, sharing coordinates of where they would hide with the container so you could find your way back.

the sky was beginning to lighten when your mother finally spoke again.

"here," she said, beginning the descent, taking your stomach with it. "any closer and we'll be detected by god knows who. you'll have to go from here."

you looked outside. there was only water. endless water. a small archipelago of rocky islands covered in vegetation, but mostly ocean stretching as far as the eye could see.

"outstanding."

"you’re a strong swimmer," your mother argued. "i’ve read your reports."

"that doesn't mean i want to jump out of a helicopter!"

"technically," Jesse shouted from the back, trying to be heard over the noise, "we can only drop you here. the trees ahead are too dense to land safely."

"you can keep your technicalities to yourself back there!" you shouted back.

your mother lowered the helicopter as much as she could, hovering maybe four meters above the dark water.

"four meters," you said, looking down. "that's four meters."

"you're an avatar, Omaticaya!" Anya leaned between the seats. "you're not supposed to be afraid of heights!"

"i'm not afraid of heights," you muttered, mostly to yourself, fingers tightening around the seatbelt. "i just avoid places where i can fall and die."

"now's not one of those times," Jesse shot back, seeming to be the only one enjoying this. 

your eyes searched for your mother. She looked steady, but you could see the tension in her shoulders. the fear in her eyes.

"mom."

"go," she said, turning her face for a second. "before I change my mind."

you took a deep breath and unbuckled. as you stood from your seat, the nausea felt like both the smallest and the biggest of your problems at once. you looked at Jesse and Anya in the back seats.

"take care of her."

"take care of yourself," Jesse returned. "And Stella."

Anya's voice cracked,  eyes shining with tears. "come back."

"i will," you promised, not knowing if it was true.

opening the door, the strong wind hit your face, the sound of the rotors deafening. below, dark water reflecting Pandora's first lights of dawn.

four meters. you could do this. you had to do this.

you looked one more time at them, at the people who were giving up everything they knew because they believed in you.

and then you jumped.

the wind whipped your body. for a split second, it felt like flying, suspended between sky and water. then the water swallowed you.

it was cold and dark. for a moment you didn't know which way was up or down, the impact disorienting your senses.

but you'd trained for this just hours earlier, simulating exactly this exact scenario. you pushed upward until you broke the surface, dragging air into your lungs.

in the sky, the helicopter was already turning, gaining altitude.

you were alone now.

in the water.

in Na'vi territory.

0813 HOURS — OPEN WATER, AWA'ATLU COASTLINE the hours in the water blurred together. your sense of time had been lost somewhere between the third and fifth hour of swimming. the sun was fully up now, hot against your back, and despite the excruciating thirst and the pain burning through your arms, it felt almost impossible to stop.

except your focus was starting to slip.

your muscles screamed louder than any training ever had. every movement was a small agony. your avatar body was strong, stronger than any human could ever be, but you were starting to understand it had limits too.

and apparently, you were dangerously close to reaching them.

knowing that sometimes the best decision was to float with the tide, you allowed yourself small breaks. feeling the sun against your face, the water no longer felt as cold as when you'd jumped, but you could feel yourself losing it. just like the characters in movies you used to watch with your friends, who you missed terribly right now.

God, can avatars even get heatstroke? you thought deliriously. because this feels like heatstroke.

your protective instinct was the only thing keeping your arms moving. every second in the water was a second your sister could be in danger. every minute lost was one less chance to find her.

part of you knew she might already be gone. that hours ago, not only Na’vi could have found her, but creatures without the reasoning to understand she was just a kid. that was the soldier in you. the older sister, however, was praying for the luck to see her just one more time

your thoughts stopped when, after what felt like your hundredth floating break, you saw it.

real land.

not the small rocky outcrops you'd been passing. actual coastline, sand so white it hurt to look at, dense jungle rising behind.

Awa'atlu.

i made it.

the sight seemed to clear your mind, interrupting the spiral of catastrophic thinking.

with the last reserves of energy you didn’t even know you had, you swam toward the shore. the moment your feet touched sand, you nearly cried in relief. you dragged yourself out of the water like some primitive creature, lungs burning. the coughing from all the saltwater you had swallowed over the past hours felt like it would never end.

you collapsed face-first into the sand, gasping, the world spinning faintly. when you had enough strength, you rolled onto your back, feeling the warm sun against your blue skin and the heavy, water-soaked clothes.

just a minute. i just need a minute to breathe, to get myself together, and then…

the sunlight on your face disappeared.

your eyes snapped open instantly, instinct taking over before your brain could fully process the threat. shadows. five, maybe six of them, blocking out the sun.

you couldn’t count them properly. your eyes burned, too tired to focus right.

blue silhouettes. tall. armed with spears and knives.

shit. didn't even get a minute. you rolled and pushed yourself up on instinct. legs trembling, vision spotted with exhaustion, but standing.

that was more than you thought you'd manage.

tthe warriors surrounded you immediately, forming a loose semicircle, feet half-buried in sand. apears pointed at your direction, hostile eyes assessing every inch.

you weren't expecting a different reception, but you'd hoped for more time.

one of them — young, probably around your age, distinct tribal tattoos on his arms and chest — stepped forward. spoke quickly in Na'vi.

you caught maybe one word in three. but the tone was crystal clear, and you knew it well. threat. intruder.

"easy," you said in broken Na'vi, hands raised in universal peace. "please. i didn't come to—"

"Avatar." another warrior spat the word like poison. "tawtute. sky demon."

your hands clenched into fists involuntarily. you forced them to relax.

"no," you said, keeping your voice as calm as possible despite your racing pulse. "i didn't come to fight. i'm looking for—"

the first warrior moved.

the spear came straight at your chest, shaft turned so the blade wouldn't hit. to scare rather than wound. he was trying to intimidate you.

and something in you snapped.

you had swum for hours. weren't welcome at home any more than you were here. had risked absolutely everything to get this far.

on reflex, your hand grabbed the spear shaft at the last second, fingers closing around the wood hard enough to stop the momentum completely. the warrior looked genuinely surprised, probably didn't expect someone so visibly exhausted to react.

you yanked the spear down while pivoting inside his guard, using his own weight against him. your elbow slammed into his ribs — not full force, you needed them after all — but hard enough to drop him.

the other four attacked immediately.

shit, shit, shit.

you barely had time to think. blocked one spear with your forearm, feeling sharp pain from the cut, and in the same second dodged another by rolling to the side.

too many. your exhausted mind couldn't track them all. they seemed to multiply, move faster than they should.

your only advantage was that they didn’t know how good you were.

you moved as fast as you could, avoiding attacks from their tails, larger and stronger than yours. surrounded, you used their own momentum against them. you kicked the back of one's knee, he destabilized but didn't fall. damn dense bones.

you created distance, and when the third warrior closed in, he was too slow. the blade was already at his throat.

you held the knife there, watching his eyes widen as you wrapped an arm around his chest and held him. promise and threat in one.

the others froze immediately. aware that the next breath could cost too much.

your chest rose and fell rapidly, muscles screaming in pain. the warrior in your grip was tense but not fighting. they were at a disadvantage, they'd have to listen.

"listen," you said, voice hard. you needed their help, but you wouldn't beg. "i. did. not. come. to. fight." the knife pressed slightly. "but i will if i have to."

the silence that followed was almost deafening. you heard only the sound of waves breaking on the beach and heavy breathing, yours and theirs.

"my sister is missing. she's an avatar like me and ran from the base. she has no training. and i'm going to find her."

the leader looked at you differently now. seemed to reassess you, and you could feel your vision darkening but maintained a hard stare, you needed him to take you seriously. desperately.

"you fight well," he admitted finally, voice low but clear. "for tawtute."

"i fight well for anyone," you corrected, but eased the knife pressure slightly in a gesture of good faith. "and i don't want to hurt anyone. i just want my sister back. that's all i want."

"lies!" another warrior hissed. "human trap. must have army coming—"

"HEY!"

you all turned. the Metkayina in your hold grunted at the tightening of your grip, but you ignored it, focused on whether you’d need to escalate again. 

a figure ran across the beach. shorter than the Metkayina, skin a different shade of blue, features visibly mixed even from a distance. he stopped dead when he saw you.

"you."

you blinked, vision clearing slightly as you focused.

Lo'ak.

"you know her?" the Metkayina leader asked, suspicious.

"yes." Lo'ak's voice was firm despite the confusion on his face. "i know her."

the leader frowned. "from where? she's—"

"that doesn't matter right now," Lo'ak cut in, finally looking at the others. "but she's not an enemy. i guarantee it."

"you guarantee?" the warrior whose throat you'd held the knife to shot back.

you seized the moment. released the warrior with a shove and tossed the knife far into the sand. a clear gesture of peace.

you raised your hands again, showing surrender. or the closest to it you were willing to give.

"i didn't come to cause trouble," you said, looking directly at Lo'ak. he would listen, he had to. "my sister. Stella. Avatar like me. is she here?"

Lo'ak shook his head slowly, stepping closer. "no. there's no one here."

your stomach dropped. hours of swimming. all of it. and she wasn't even here.

"but," Lo'ak continued quickly, seeing desperation take over your face, "that doesn't mean anything. she could be anywhere on the reef, she could have been found by another clan. my dad— he’ll know more. if she showed up anywhere, he’d know."

"your dad." your voice came out rough. "Jake Sully."

Lo'ak nodded.

the Metkayina leader — you really needed to find out his name — looked between you two, clearly trying to understand the dynamic. "Lo'ak, if she came from the Omaticaya—"

"no, she..." Lo'ak said, cutting himself off. "it's... complicated. but my dad will want to speak with her. i'm sure of it."

"obviously," he muttered. then looked at you. "you come. Olo'eyktan decides your fate."

"thank you."

"don't thank me yet," he snapped, and you'd never held back an eye roll so hard.

Lo'ak stepped closer, lowering his voice. you saw him assessing you, curious. "you... really came alone?"

your chest eased hearing your familiar language.

"yes."

"unarmed?"

"now i am."

"swimming?"

"i didn't exactly have another choice."

he let out a sound that was almost a laugh. "that's insane."

"probably," you agreed, shrugging. "i need to find—"

"i know." something crossed his face. understanding. "we'll find her. i promise we'll try."

nodding in agreement, you felt sudden exhaustion weakening you in seconds. your body choosing that moment to remember the hours of swimming and the physical fight with the Na’vi warriors.

everything shifted. the world tilted sideways, vision blurring at the edges. your legs trembled, threatening to give out.

"hey," Lo'ak said, noticing your eyes drifting, his hand automatically going to your arm. "you okay—"

he was interrupted by a sharp, bright pain exploding through your skull. something hard hit your head. without strength to react, it was like your body turned to jelly.

the world spun violently and in the background you could hear Lo'ak shout something — angry, surprised — but the sound was distorted, distant.

and then darkness swallowed you whole.

"skxawng!" Lo'ak caught you before you hit the sand hard. arms around your torso, cushioning the fall. "what did you do?" he hissed at Rotxo, who still held the spear, uncomfortable.

"she was falling!" Rotxo defended himself.

"she was passing out, fishlips!" Lo'ak shot back, checking the side of your head where the spear shaft had struck. "great. my dad's gonna love this."

Aonung lowered his own spear, looking at your unconscious body with an unreadable expression. "how do you know her?"

"she saved my life, on that last patrol..."

"why?"

Lo'ak had spent days thinking about the incident before aceppting he wouldn’t get answers. "i don't know, bro. but she did. and now she’s here."

"alone." Rotxo murmured. "cross the ocean. that's..."

"insane," Aonung finished. "or brave, since she's not made for swimming."

Lo'ak turned his eyes back to you. even unconscious, he could see your effort. muscles trembling slightly even in forced sleep.

you had destroyed yourself to get there. in that moment, you reminded him of Neteyam.

"let's take her to my dad," Lo'ak said. "before anything else."

"he's going to kill you," Aonung pointed out, used to the boy's recklessness.

"probably," Lo'ak agreed, already starting to walk. "but I think this time he'll have to get in line."

they started walking back to the village. moments later, a small crowd had already formed. of course nothing ever went unnoticed here.

this was the second time Lo'ak found himself so exposed. the first was when he'd arrived there, and though the feeling hadn't been pleasant then, this seemed a million times worse. .

an avatar. Tawtute. unconscious in his arms. that would be interesting to explain, to say the least.

the sound of the group’s arrival began to spread through Awa’atlu, catching Neteyam's attention. moments before, he'd changed his patrol route to help Tsireya, wondering where his brother had gone. normally, he wasn't far from where the Metkayina girl would be.

but when he asked, she only said he'd gone to meet her brother and hadn't returned yet.

the two exchanged looks at the commotion, her shoulders hunching when they heard Aonung's voice almost shouting something about "Lo'ak being an idiot again."

"looks like he's back," she murmured with a small smile.

Neteyam grunted before dropping the basket he was carrying and turning around, Tsireya following behind.

"it's probably nothing," she said as they pushed through the crowd.

"it's always something," Neteyam murmured back.

it took a few seconds to make their way through the Metkayina, his eyes searching for his brother and any sign of his angry father. he only found his brother surrounded by other warriors.

"Lo'ak—" he called, about to ask what was going on.

but he stopped completely when he saw.

he was carrying someone. not one of their people. she wore Avatar clothes. a woman. unconscious. she was soaked, long dark hair clinging to her face and shoulders.

five fingers visible even at a distance.

no. 

he found himself moving toward them before consciously deciding. Tsireya said something behind him but he didn't process the words.

closer now, he could see everything.

it can’t be. please — don’t let it be.

scratches covering her arms. a cut on her shoulder. bruising already forming on her temple.

it's you.

"Lo'ak," he heard his own voice say, coming out rougher than intended. "what happened?"

Lo'ak looked at him, and something crossed his brother's face. he'd recognized you.

he had no idea how familiar you already were to Neteyam.

"we found her on the beach," Lo'ak explained. "they fought but she's okay, defended herself well."

"Rotxo hit her," Aonung added, earning a glare from Lo'ak.

"you hit her?" his voice came out sharper than he meant.

Aonung frowned, clearly not understanding why his friends were defending a sky person. "she fought us first—"

"because you surrounded her," Lo'ak interrupted, clearly tired of the argument. "look, we can figure out who's at fault later. she's looking for her sister. alone. she crossed the ocean. must've been swimming for hours."

what were you thinking, coming here alone?

Neteyam moved closer, unable to stop. now, standing at your side, he could see your face clearly. the trembling in your limbs even unconscious. lips cracked and dry, so different from how he remembered. eyes that had burned with determination now closed.

even unconscious, everything seemed to revolve around you.

"the sister," he said, voice more controlled now. "did she say what happened?"

"she's an avatar like her, said she ran from their base... name's... i think is Stella."

Neteyam processed this. you had a sister. you had come to save your sister.

just as he had, countless times.

the crowd was growing now. he could see Spider approaching, Kiri right behind. and behind them, his parents.

Jake pushed through the crowd, Neytiri at his side. Tonowari and Ronal weren't far, wearing the same expressions they'd had when they'd arrived on the island.

shit.

"Lo'ak," Jake said, his voice hard like it got seconds before a lecture. "what's going on?"

Lo'ak straightened his shoulders, still holding the girl. "Aonung and the others found her on the shore, they fought, that's why she's unconscious." Neteyam saw him sigh before admitting what they'd kept for so long. "i know who she is... well, i don't know her name..."

Jake seemed to process this, frowning. "you know her… from where?"

Lo'ak hesitated. looked at Neteyam. then back at their father.

"she let us go, during the train attack... Neteyam and i could've been found but she confused her people and let us go..."

the silence that followed was deafening.

from the look his mother gave him and the exhaustion in his father's voice, Neteyam was almost certain they would rather he’d grown a fifth finger than hear the whole story behind it. and Neteyam saw the exact moment his father understood why he'd been acting so strangely these past few weeks.

he looked between both of his sons. then at you, still unconscious.

"a human let you escape..." he said slowly, "and now she's here."

"yes, sir?" Lo'ak confirmed with some hesitation in his voice.

"why?"

"her sister ran from their base. she said she tracked her here, came alone. through the ocean."

Jake ran a hand over his face, and part of Neteyam felt relieved the secret was out. at least now he didn't have to carry it alone.

Tonowari approached, looking at the avatar with a carefully neutral expression. "an Avatar. in our territory. after fighting our warriors."

"she only defended herself," Lo'ak began. his mother looked at him as if asking him to stop.

Neteyam wanted to say something, anything in your defense. but Lo’ak was already doing that, which wasn’t surprising, his brother had never met an outcast he didn’t immediately want to protect, it was like a hobby at that point. 

and if Neteyam joined in, it would raise questions he couldn’t answer. something in him wanted to insist you were different, that you’d proven it. but the words wouldn’t come. they carried weight he wasn’t ready to bear.

Ronal appeared beside her husband, sharp eyes assessing the girl. "she does not belong here. and those who arrive in our waters with violence bring danger with them. she's dangerous."

"or desperate," Neytiri murmured, surprising everyone. Neteyam couldn't tell if she meant it or just wanted to disagree with Tsahìk.

his father's gaze shifted to his mother. a silent conversation passed between them, the kind that came from years of navigating together. Neytiri's chin dipped, barely perceptible.

Jake stepped away with Tonowari, voices too low to hear. when they came back, Lo'ak went rigid beside him. Neteyam knew that look. already preparing to argue. his brother had already made up his mind about you, and he'd fight their father's decision if he had to.

their father cut him off before he could start.

"alright," Jake decided, voice firm as usual. "take her to a separate marui. don't leave her alone for even a second. when she wakes up, you get me. immediately." he looked around, making sure the whole village heard, even though everyone knew who he was really talking to. "until then, nobody in or out without my permission. understood?"

"yes, sir."

"i'll take her," Lo'ak said.

"i'm coming too," Neteyam added immediately. 

as if there'd been any other option. as if he could've stayed behind.

Jake looked at him. really looked at him. for a long, heavy second.

Neteyam held his father's gaze, wondering if his father could see it. the way he'd moved toward you without thinking.

"all right, both of you go. but," he pointed at both, "don't take your eyes off her. not for a second. and when she wakes, call me immediately. no exceptions."

"yes, sir," they answered together.

the two started toward the marui where you would be placed, showing no sign of waking. you seemed to sleep peacefully.

and Neteyam didn't know if he wanted you to wake up.

a second after leaving the crowd, Spider appeared beside them, looking at the avatar with clear curiosity. "guys, this time you've outdone yourselves."

he and Kiri observed you with curiosity. Neteyam couldn’t blame them, you had that effect on people.

"she swam all the way here?" Kiri asked, incredulous.

"looks like it," Lo'ak answered.

"that's crazy."

"yeah," Kiri agreed, seeming to study you closely. "but it's her family. love makes people do insane things."

Neteyam kept following his brother, too close to be casual. he could feel Kiri and Spider behind them, and beyond that, the eyes of half the village watching.

but he was starting to understand something uncomfortable: when you were involved, he didn't fully recognize himself. it was like having a blind spot, and you were right in the center of it.

because even when he tried to see the whole situation clearly, you were all he could see.

taglist. @aria-writer @yoxiaogi @wtmwh @loversonne @eternallovers65 @jasminionn @bitchystudentninja @ezminiqqqqq @sasathvsstuff @ken-zah @xoxogospgirl @minnyer @nii-facedaingeal @xxvelvetxxxx @mysticmoon-0107 @thisisasecretsstuff @char-izard3 @laurietheflower @miniaturemartian

i want to five a special thank you to all of you for your kindness and lovely comments. i hope you enjoyed this chapter—sorry for the long read!

[fleurlia]

borrowed blue | neteyam sully

pairing. neteyam x reader genre. fluff, angst word count. 5,8k songs to listen to while reading. out of the woods, taylor swift. i know places, taylor swift.

part two

summary. when your mother was invited to work on Pandora, she had only two conditions: that both her daughters came with her, and that a cure would be found for the youngest one’s disease. one of the first things she told you was that Pandora was lethal, but the most dangerous thing you could do was fall in love with it. everyone around your new home whispered stories about Jake Sully, but as the eldest daughter, all you cared about was protecting your family, no matter the cost.

after two years of active service as a soldier in the war between Na'vi and humans and an experiment that practically stole your body, now you barely recognize yourself without the borrowed blue skin and amber eyes. yet Pandora has a way of pulling together what is meant to be, even when it makes no sense at all.

and that's how she brought you, Neteyam.

or in which. nothing you had was ever truly yours, not your body, your health, your mind, nearly your soul. all you wanted was to feel like yourself, but you were still trying to find her. what you found instead was Neteyam, the future Olo'eyktan of the people you were fighting. and even though you knew how badly this could end, you saw him. and he saw you too. not the borrowed blue, only you.

author's note. hi guys! it's been a while since i wrote anything, so please be gentle with me. i've just been reading so many beautiful scenarios lately and couldn't stop thinking about this story until i wrote it down. i wasn’t sure if it would be one really long chapter or more, but it kinda grow into me and i knew that the whole scenario it was going to be more than 25k words (or more i dare say). i hope you enjoy it! i love the movies (and neteyam even more, please come back, it’s not funny anymore).

english isn’t my first language, so feel free to point out any mistakes. let me know if you’d like to see more!

PANDORA - 2173 you'd been on Pandora for almost two years, but you still weren't used to the way the forest breathed at night.

from your position on the observation deck of Compound 3, you could watch small bioluminescent creatures pulsing through the canopy like a heartbeat. alien, beautiful, and completely indifferent to the human presence that prowled the night around them. the irony wasn't lost on you. you knew your presence here was only a fraction of what was destroying this place, taking everything it could offer without mercy, even as every fiber of your being ached to dive into it, to understand it, to belong.

your human fingers tightened on the safety railing. eyes fixed on the forest you longed to explore, even as your stomach knotted at the idea of going out there in this fragile body. the metal was cold against your skin even through your tactical gloves, a sharp reminder of which world you truly belonged to.

you'd grown too accustomed to being out there breathing freely without the breathing mask, your blue body didn't need one. now the mask felt suffocating, restrictive, making you want to turn around and ignore the constant reminders to spend as much time as possible in your human body.

but you never did.

"you're doing it again."

you didn't even blink at the sound of her voice, didn't turn to face your mother's gaze, you could feel it anyway. Dr. Sophia Reeves had a gift for appearing silently, a skill honed by years of fieldwork and a natural inclination toward observation over confrontation. you couldn’t remember a single time you’d seen your mother choose action over strategy.

"doing what?" you asked, though you knew exactly what she meant.

"looking out there like it's something sacred." she stopped by your side, the breathing mask on her face hiding some of her features, but you could see from the corner of your eye the warm maternal look she had. she pulled her lab coat tighter against Pandora's cold wind. even off duty, she was never fully out of that uniform. "it's dangerous to romanticize an ecosystem that's actively trying to kill you, sweetheart."

"is it trying to kill us?" finally looking at her, you could catch the exhaustion in the lines around her eyes. it was the most exhausted you'd seen her in years. "or are we trying to kill it, and it's just defending itself?"

your mother's jaw tightened, not in an aggressive way of showing she was getting angry, but it was the only sign that you'd touched an exposed nerve. "don't do this."

most of the time, you tried not to act like one of those rebellious teenagers, there was no room for that on Pandora. but something twisted in your chest when someone accused these people of things they weren’t.

"don't do what? point out that we're the invaders here? that every sample you collect, every tree the RDA cuts down, every—"

"don't make this harder than it already is." her voice failed, just slightly, and guilt washed over you. you knew why she'd taken this job. you both knew. there was no moral high ground when it came to your sister’s life.

silence settled between you, heavy with everything you had stopped saying to each other. the most you ever managed to get from her in those two years was a clenched jaw. even in the face of such cruelty, you never saw her question or hesitate. in that moment, arguments about ethics and survival that neither of you could win would only push you further apart, so you chose to back down.

finally, she sighed, retreating as well. "stella's new doses start tomorrow. the new batch of compound arrived this morning."

Stella. your younger sister, only fourteen years old, had been wasting away from a degenerative neural disease that Earth's medicine had given up on curing. the "compound" your mother spoke of so clinically was extracted from Pandora's oceans, specifically from Tulkun, the whale-like creatures the Metkayina clan considered a sacred family.

with your gaze heavy as you looked at the person you loved most in the world, part of you could never stop asking:

how many mothers had to cry so mine could smile?

the question had begun haunting you months ago. at first, you hadn't cared to understand what caused your sister's recovery, all that mattered was that she was alive. each injection bought you more time with her, more hours where she moved through the world in her human body, the towering Na’vi form appearing less and less, so you chose not to look too closely. you let it be. 

until the moment you finally found the courage to trace the origin of Stella’s miracle. it didn't take long for your mind to connect the dots after some research. after reading about the extraction process, you spent nearly an hour bent over the toilet, unable to stop vomiting. still, even that felt less desperate than the moment your mother found you curled on the bathroom floor. she said nothing. you said nothing back. 

that night she pressed a cold cloth to your neck until you could breathe again.

neither of you had spoken about it since.

"that's good," you forced yourself to say. "she's been asking to go out in her avatar again. maybe after treatment—"

"she can go tomorrow afternoon," your mother agreed, something like relief softening her voice. safe territory. "if you're free to supervise."

"always." that was true. no matter what was happening, what moral compromises you both were swallowing, seeing Stella strong and healthy made everything almost bearable. almost.

your mother squeezed your shoulder once, softly. her eyes examined your face, careful, thoughtful. you wondered why, until she smiled faintly, exhaling slowly. 

"i missed seeing your face."

she went inside after that. you knew what she meant by the emphasis on your face. your human face, not your avatar.

with a tired sigh, you stayed on the deck a while longer, watching the forest pulse with life, wondering if the Na'vi out there had any idea how much their world cost. how many impossible choices it created.

then your radio crackled. "Blue Team, report to briefing room at 0600. field mission, full tactical gear."

you pressed the confirmation button without thinking much, it wasn't like there was a choice. another mission. another day protecting people who laid Pandora bare while you pretended not to notice how your hands trembled every time you had to raise a weapon in that sacred forest.

the worst part? you were good at it.

0547 HOURS - AVATAR LINK UNIT the transition never got easier.

you'd never been a fan of tight spaces — you believed maybe no living being could say they were —  but over time, the confinement bothered you less than the process itself. lying back in the link capsule, you could feel the interface gel cold against your neck even through your hair. the lights went out, systems humming to life around you, and then the familiar pressure behind your eyes, as if something were pushing through your visual cortex. 

most operators didn’t report discomfort when switching bodies. but you did. your human body rejected the disconnect, fighting a process that had been adjusted and modified so many times you’d lost count.

your avatar was part of an experiment. that was something they didn't tell you when you volunteered for the avatar program at sixteen, desperate to be useful on Pandora, some reason to be here besides being the valuable scientist's daughter.

project Janus, they called it. permanent neural synchronization. the goal was to create operators who could spend unlimited time in their avatars, eliminating the need for constant consciousness transfers. if humans were going to stay on this planet, they wanted every option ready. this was to test whether humans could truly become Na’vi.

they knew it was possible out there, by Na'vi hands, and they knew because there was living proof—problematic proof, you'd say.

and it worked.

sort of.

your avatar was neurologically bonded to you so deeply that your human brain now rejected your own body. staying in it too long caused discomfort that it was starting to become unbearable — more than two hours resulted in debilitating migraines, nausea, and disorientation. your human body needed the avatar now. you needed it. 

you needed the tall, strong blue body that wasn’t truly yours, yet felt more like home than the pale, fragile flesh you were born into.

they called it a side effect. you called it a prison.

after the mistakes made with early subjects in your project, Colonel Miles Quaritch, who should've stayed dead, walked around base like he had every right to. you weren't proud of having any part in that. not after meeting him.

the discomfort peaked and then your eyes opened.

you sat up on the avatar-side link table, muscles stretching and responding with a grace your human body never had. there you were, nearly eight and a half feet tall, blue skin marked by the unique stripes of your DNA, ears twitching at the sounds of the facility.

the body had grown for you. made from your DNA mixed with Na'vi material. technically, it was you. biologically indistinguishable from a real Na'vi, except for one detail. 

five fingers instead of four. 

a small reminder that you were a hybrid. an aberration to amber eyes.

you flexed your hands, staring at the extra fingers. the Na'vi always recognized what you were. 

Dreamwalker. Demon in stolen skin.

standing up, your reflection caught in the glass, the borrowed blue staring back at you. your mother’s words echoed in your mind.

i missed seeing your face.

for a moment, you wondered. what if this was your face now? you could barely tell them apart anymore. and still, it never seemed to be enough, for both sides.

"status check," the technician’s voice cut in.

"green," you responded. "all systems normal."

"copy. Blue Team is gathering in the south hangar. you've got fifteen to gear up."

you passed other avatars preparing along the way. scientists, mostly military operators, with that hard look that came from seeing too much, doing too much. some nodded. most ignored you. you were new compared to them. two years of active service.

that was the only thing you didn’t doubt about yourself at Pandora.

your place in the unit.

not because you were a prodigy at combat or at surviving on Pandora, you weren't. but if there was something you did, it was earn it. you worked harder than everyone else, trained longer, pushed further. because if you were indispensable, if you were necessary, maybe it would be worth it. 

maybe all the horrors you had witnessed had something to do with you beyond just keeping Stella alive. 

and that made you one of the best.

you strapped on your tactical gear. light vest. utility belt. combat knife. and then, with hands that wanted to tremble, you picked up the gun.

modified AR-15 for Na’vi hands. lethal, efficient. a fast weapon for targets that moved even faster.

"nice toy."

you looked up. Corporal Davies, one of the veteran operators, smiled in a way that didn't reach his eyes. he’d been there since the first real war.

"hope i don’t have to use it," you muttered, checking the safety. definitely a dumb answer.

"you will when one of the blues has an arrow pointed at your head." he clapped your shoulder with unnecessary force. "out there isn't a science field trip, rookie. it's us or them."

you didn’t reply.

“not a science walk, rookie. us or them’’ a voice mimicked behind you. turning, you saw your friend, Jesse. Avatar technician, he was one of the few people you actually liked in the RDA. 

“good luck dealing with that one,” he added. 

"i'll try to come back alive."

“well, yeah. who else would i lie for on the diagnostics?”

0612 HOURS - SOUTH HANGAR

the briefing was short and direct. like almost everything in the RDA.

"sector 7-G," Lieutenant Cross said, highlighting a dense area on the map. "botany team needs samples from a specific group of trees near the river. intel suggests low but non-zero Na’vi activity. Blue Team provides perimeter security. standard engagement rules. don't shoot first, but don't hesitate if threatened."

your stomach hurt, it always did. standard rules meant any Na'vi who appeared would be treated as hostile. always.

"questions?"

you had thousands. none you could say out loud.

"no, sir," the group answered in unison.

"good. wheels up in ten. don't make me bring anyone back in a bag." the team dispersed. you were heading out when you heard it.

"hey! wait!"

you turned and your heart leaped. Stella.

or rather, Stella's avatar, running toward you with the adorable uncoordination of someone still getting used to legs that were too long. she was fourteen in her human body, but the avatar had been grown to sixteen. the age doctors hoped she'd reach if treatment kept working.

if.

"where are you going?" she stopped in front of you, golden eyes shining with excitement. in this body, she didn't look pale or tremble constantly. she was strong. complete. as she should be. as she deserved to be.

"just a routine mission," you said, forcing a smile. "i'll be back by lunch."

"promise?" something in her tone made your stomach drop.

"promise." you pulled her into a quick hug, reassuring yourself as always with her warmth, the life. "and later, if you're feeling okay after treatment, we can go to that place near the waterfalls you like."

her face lit up. "really? mom said yes?"

"she already approved" technically true. 

"you're the best," Stella said, squeezing you tight.

"keep that in mind when i wake you up early tomorrow for balance training," you teased, messing up her hair. 

"Blue Team, board now!" Cross's voice echoed through the hangar. 

"i have to go." you pulled away, but Stella grabbed your hand.

"be careful out there," she said softly. "the forest... it doesn't like what we do. i can feel it when i'm there. like it's... sad."

cold slid down your spin. "what do you mean?"

"i don't know." she let go, her blue face covering with a light purple blush. "it's weird. sometimes i feel like i belong more there than here. that i should... i don't know."

"Stella—"

"NOW, soldier!"

"we'll talk when i get back," you said quickly, squeezing her shoulder one last time before running to the transport.

but as the samson took off, carrying you toward the forest, Stella's words echoed in your mind.

she's sad.

you stared out the window, watching the blue-green canopy stretch to the horizon, wondering if the forest could feel that you shared the same grief.

SECTOR 7-G - 0847 HOURS

from above, Pandora almost seemed almost domesticated, a green carpet dotted with rocky outcrops and winding rivers. but here, with your boots in moss, trees rising like living cathedrals, you felt what your sister meant.

the forest breathed. it seemed alive. and it was watching, at least you felt watched.

"perimeter established," Davies reported via radio. "north clear."

"south clear," 

you were positioned east, crouched behind a massive root, weapon in hand but eyes constantly wandering to the wonders around you. the sensation of the air brought you a certain peace. the only thing that ever made you happy about being a soldier was that freedom of being out there.

two years ago, when you first arrive on Pandora and started your training, your mother told you that despite being lethal, one of the greatest dangers was falling in love with it.

you knew why she had specifically told you that. as a scientist, she loved this place and you'd bet she recognized that same look in your eyes. she was warning you about Jake Sully. you'd never met him, but the thought that he'd once been just like you and now was Toruk Makto sent chills down your spine.

your fingers were on the radio to report your area clear when you noticed something. footprints. fresh ones.

five toes, you counted twice to be sure. not a Na'vi pattern.

you looked around, no one from your unit was walking without combat boots. Na'vi had four fingers, four toes, it couldn't be one of them unless it was one of yours.

except for... the thought hit you. the Sullys. you'd heard some of them looked just like Jake. five fingers. five toes. of all the damn luck. you were good, you knew it. but you probably weren't as good as Toruk Makto.

"everyone, we have a train with cargo passing a few miles from our position. there's been a delay and it's almost arriving, eyes sharp." Davies's voice crackled in your ear again, and despite living in a constant state of anxiety, this one had perhaps reached its peak.

you should report it. should alert the team that there were Na'vi in the area, especially when the cargo was so close, especially when one of the Sullys might be around. instead, your hands moved without conscious permission, dragging branches over the footprints, blurring the edges with your boot, erasing the trail.

what are you doing?

the answer to that question was probably worth millions. Jake Sully was at the heart of this endless war you were caught in the middle of. capturing him would mean the end of it. mostly.

something in you didn't want to upset the forest with more deaths. pathetic, you’d say.

you just knew something deep inside you refused to turn those footprints into coordinates. into targets.

"we just need a few more minutes, maybe fifteen… and we can leave," your mother's voice came over the radio. she was at the center of the perimeter with two other scientists, collecting samples from a species of tree rumored to have medicinal properties.

fifteen minutes. you were perfectly capable of securing a quiet area.

but then you saw it, almost missed it, but caught it from the corner of your eye.

movement.

not above. ahead.

your heart stopped.

just a few miles away, half-hidden behind all the trees covered in bioluminescent moss, was a Na'vi.

young. male. his skin painted in camouflage patterns that should have made him invisible, but your trained eyes — or perhaps the careless way he moved — had caught him.

and he was already looking directly at you.

you both froze. predator and prey, neither certain which role they occupied. he was smaller than the warriors you'd seen in reconnaissance footage. younger. maybe your age. just one braid swaying slightly with the movement of his head, the others were pulled back. his amber eyes slightly wide in something between fear and hesitation.

your hand was already on your gun when he gripped the knife he carried. of course there wouldn't be time for him.

then he moved first.

a short call, instinctive, guttural, coming from deep in his throat. it seemed like a cornered warning: back off or fight.

you looked at his hands, five fingers. problably a Sully.

that hissed was meant to be intimidating. but you saw how tense his shoulders were. his breathing too fast. the way his gaze flicked sideways for a split second, calculating an escape.

he seemed terrified. you probably didn’t look any better. 

he’s just a boy, you thought, feeling the trigger under your fingers.

you never took your luck for granted when it came to awareness. even when you let yourself get distracted by the forest, you kept your field of vision clear — or used to. now, there seemed to be nothing but the boy in front of you and that almost cost you your life.

high above, hidden in the trees, poised as if ready to move at any second, there was another Na'vi. just outside your line of sight.

Neteyam.

his bow was raised, arrow nocked, string drawn. he had a clean shot. he could end this now. then his eyes met Lo'ak's briefly, his brother knew he was there. Neteyam almost let a curse slip.

'skxawng,' he thought furiously. 'reckless idiot, what are you doing this close to them?'

you, dreamwalker, were armed. you had the superior position. Lo'ak was exposed, the arrow might not even reach you before you hurt him.

Neteyam's eyes drifted for a second to your face. he was still breathless from chasing Lo'ak down before his brother could do something stupid — only to find him in the worst possible situation. you must be close to his age. a bit taller than Lo'ak. features too delicate. for that second he thought you were the most beautiful dreamwalker he’d ever seen.

a soldier.

his fingers trembled on the string. he needed to shoot. now. even then, he might not save Lo'ak in time.

but you'd made your decision first. the realization hit you like a punch. he didn't seem like an experienced warrior, despite being a son of Toruk Makto, despite being unable to escape the war. to you, right now, he was just a Na'vi teenager caught in something bigger than him. you couldn't tell if it was his luck or your misfortune that had brought you together like this.

in an impressive silence, your free hand flew to your mouth, finger pressed against your lips. ‘silence, please, be quiet', you thought. and very deliberately, very slowly, you lowered your weapon. pointing it at the ground. away from him.

the Na'vi froze, confusion replacing the fear in his eyes.

Neteyam froze too.

'what—?'

his fingers loosened on the string without permission. just slightly.

'who are you?' his mind tracked your every move, waiting for the trap.

you had no words. not in Na'vi, not in a way that a scared and probably dangerous Na’vi teenager would understand, and you desperately needed him to understand you before another soldier saw him. so you did the only thing you could think of in that second.

you turned your back on him.

you're insane. you're dead.

but you weren't.

you crouched again, back completely vulnerable to him, and began erasing the rest of the footprints. methodically. calmly. as if he weren't there. as if you couldn't feel his eyes burning between your shoulder blades.

Neteyam lowered his bow completely, too shocked to maintain his aim.

you were... protecting lo'ak?

'this doesn't make sense,' Neteyam thought, silently descending to a lower branch for a better view. his bow already slung across his back, his guard lowering. ‘none of this makes sense.'

he watched your trembling hands cover the remaining marks in the mud with moss. noticed how your gaze never reached lo'ak, as if giving him space, time to choose.

"east sector, status?" Cortez's voice snapped over the radio, nearly making you flinch.

Neteyam's breath caught. if he was reading this right, it wouldn't be the first time some tawtute had grabbed one of his siblings to get to his father. and he knew you'd seen Lo'ak's fingers, five of them. that was always the first thing tawtute looked for.

"clear. no movement."

lie. an obvious one.

you kept erasing footprints, heart pounding so loud you were certain he could hear. you'd bet anyone within miles away could hear.

‘go away’, you thought desperately. ‘i gave you the chance. please, just go’.

there was a moment of silence.

Lo'ak searched for his brother through the foliage. when their eyes met, he signed quickly. 'can we trust?'

Neteyam didn't know. everything in him screamed trap, but he saw your hands trembling, heard the lie that had just left your lips. saw Lo'ak, alive, because you hadn’t pulled the trigger.

he signed back. 'go. now.'

and then the softest sound of disturbed leaves reached your ears. you didn't look, didn't turn. just kept working, unable to still your shaking fingers as you covered the last traces that someone had been there.

when you finally gathered the courage to look over your shoulder, he was gone. disappeared into the forest as if he'd never been there.

but neteyam hadn't disappeared, you didn’t even know he was there, yet he stayed, hidden in the shadows. watching as you fell apart the moment Lo’ak was gone, someone who, to you, didn’t even have a name.

Neteyam saw your hands sink into the soil. your expression crumbling, eyes closed as if fighting something inside yourself.

'you're suffering,' he realized, surprise. 'whatever you just did, it wasn't easy for you.'

that intrigued him more than it should have.

forcing yourself to stand on legs that felt like jelly, you began checking the perimeter with eyes that now saw every shadow as a either potential threat or another potential Sully you'd just helped hide.

focus. your mother is here. work to do.

you returned to your position, careful not to look guilty.

neteyam kept himself just beyond your sight, slipping through the shadows after you. 'who are you?' the thought returned 'and why can't you kill when you should?’ he knew the sky people didn't care whether they caught Sullys or not, that was even better for them. his father and mother would come running trying to save any of them. maybe you hadn't realized that. you looked young, but Lo'ak did too — he looked young too — so that couldn't be the excuse.

he knew he should leave. his father had been clear when he'd said that he and Lo'ak were to take position above the defenses and prepare for the approaching train attack. but then Lo'ak, as always, had gotten caught up trying to help. Neteyam didn't know if his brother was actively trying to get both of them killed or just him, but later, he would deal with Lo’ak for the mess he’d just cause, before their father knew about it. but despite all those reasons, he stayed. perhaps the most reckless decision he'd ever made, dangerously similar to his younger brother's.

minutes crawled by in tense silence.

you swept the area again, every sense sharpened. eyes glued to your mother, who focused on the team under her command. you checked sightlines, mapped escape routes, catalogued potential threats, just in case your stupidity came back to haunt you. you doubted it would, but your bad luck had a way of proving you wrong.

you were almost convinced your little encounter would be the only thing haunting you, until your ears caught, in the distance, an explosion.

your breath caught. 

you looked up just in time to see countless ikran crossing the sky in attack formation, far beyond weapon range, heading in the opposite direction.

the train.

"MOVEMENT!" Davie’s voice exploded over the radio, making you jump. "MULTIPLE HOSTILES! NORTH AND SOUTH SECTORS!"

Neteyam’s head snapped sharply at the sound of his clan executing the plan he had studied countless times. he needed to go. needed to join the warriors, help with the coordinated attack. 

he’d been distracted by the dreamwalker for too longer. but then he looked in your direction again.

you were running toward the center, where your unarmed people in lab coats stood.

and lo’ak. again.

‘skxawng’ neteyam thought.

his brother was moving back in, reckless, crossing an area about to become a battlefield. Neteyam didn't know if he hadn't noticed the soldiers dispersing in the same direction or if he really believed he was invisible, which he wasn't. Neteyam could confirm.

there was a weird instant, too short to be called silence, but heavy enough to make your body react before your mind could.

then the ground shook.

now you could hear it, feel it in your feet: the Na'vi screams, the whistle of arrows cutting through air, the sharp crack of return fire. your people were dividing — very poorly, you'd say — between defending the team and dispersing for the attack. maybe by the time they reached the train, the forest people would have already taken everything. you knew Jake Sully was out there, with his kids, at least one of them.

"PROTECT THE TEAM!" Cross shouted. "MOVE TO EXTRACTION POINT! NOW!"

adrenaline started to make you move. your mother was there, vulnerable. you started running towards her, desperate to get her out of the forest as quickly as possible. that’s when you saw the crossfire forming: soldiers running toward the train, probably under attack, and few — dangerously few — advancing in your direction.

and to the left. through the smoke beginning to form, two Na'vi.

one of them was the Sully from before, had to be, and another, running through the forest. not in your direction. trying to cross the territory to reach the attack on the other side.

the second one, who seemed older, moved through the branches above. at that distance you could never se his fingers. ‘where did he come from? was he there this whole time?’ you wondered as you tried to follow him with your eyes.

he descended from the trees like flowing water, a movement so smooth it seemed impossible for something solid, defying gravity. he landed without making a sound, grabbing the younger one by the arm and pulling him forcefully behind a rock formation.

"you’re an idiot—"

"i know, i know! but i need to—"

"you need to stay alive, Lo'ak!" his voice was rough, desperate in a way he was trying to hide.

even at a distance, you heard the possessive, protective tone. he positioned his body between the younger one and the forming line of fire, and something in your chest tightened recognizing that gesture.

brothers.

you could tell instantly.

not from the words you barely understood, but from how he positioned himself. from the desperation that escaped even when he tried to hide it. you’d recognize that fear anywhere, it was the same you felt for your little sister. 

the second Sully spotted that day. it only gets better, you thought bitterly.

you were pressed against a tree trunk, caught between advancing toward your mother and the chaos unfolding in front of you.

your eyes finally managed to focus on him through the smoke. bow on his back. war paint streaked across his skin. long braids swaying with every movement. four fingers. that caught you by surprise.

but then you saw his eyes, you'd seen the same ones when you looked at the younger one earlier, or even in your own mirror, but his…

his seemed different.

amber. intense. alive.

something in your mind — something you were beginning to understand was traitorous — whispered beautiful before you could stop it.

you'd studied footage of his parents during training. Jake Sully, Neytiri. but those were just recordings. this one was everything the training videos didn't show. you couldn't see just a target, a hostile. you saw a warrior. real. breathing. protecting someone he loved with the same ferocity that... you perhaps would.

Neteyam checked escape routes. all blocked. if he tried to run now, that soldier barely a tenth of a mile away, would see them. they wouldn’t make it three steps.

in that second, your mind went back to Stella. to her cure, paid for in blood. to the excuses you fed yourself, every day, just to wake up and do it all again.

strangely, you realized you were both doing the same thing. trying to keep your siblings alive. 

and then you saw him. Davies. positioned exactly where the Na'vi had looked. his gun raising. aiming not at a distant target, but at the close movement.

at them.

maybe he wasn't sure they were there yet. he would be in seconds.

Neteyam noticed too. the barrel lifting, the sight aligning. he had three seconds to cover Lo’ak. maybe four if he was lucky.

it wasn't enough. your heart, already racing, hammered as the decision formed before thought could catch up.

"DAVIES!" you shouted, forcing your voice above the chaos "NORTH SECTOR! MOVEMENT IN NORTH SECTOR!"

Neteyam's fingers tightened on the bowstring, pausing mid-draw. it was a lie. there was no one there except them — who were the only ones stupid enough to be there at that moment. he knew it. 

but it worked.

Davies turned, trusting the call, redirecting fire toward nothing. Neteyam saw the soldier turn. saw the moment of opening. ‘now’.

he watched Lo’ak begin to move, and then he looked up. toward the voice. toward you.

you were already staring straight at them, through smoke and confusion and impossibility. for one endless second, your eyes locked.

Neteyam couldn't breathe.

even at that distance, he could see the fear in your eyes. the determination. the silent plea. and you saw the exact moment he understood. watching the bow on his back that was half-raised now motionless. the knife at his waist. the marks across his body from who knows how many battles.

you knew he could have killed you before you could blink. if you were correct about his parents, he probably could.

'you,' he thought, shocked. ‘you again’

why?

in your own mind, as you were asking the same question, you didn't know the answer. you felt like you couldn't let them die.

"WHERE?" Davies was shouting, still shooting north. "I DON'T SEE ANYTHING!"

you forced your voice to work, feeling your throat burn: "t-they're running! they fled when they saw us!"

the call made Neteyam snap back, having time only to catch the lie leaving your lips. seeing you risk everything to give him and Lo’ak seconds.

he held your gaze for one more reckless moment, trying to memorize your face. the golden eyes so similar and so different from his. the delicate stripes. the five fingers that marked you as they had marked his father, his siblings. 

'i saw you,' he thought, even without understanding what that meant yet.

then he moved.

you watched him grab the boy and vanish into the vegetation, feeling more exposed than you ever had in your life. but not before he looked back once more.

not before those amber eyes burned your face into his memory the same way he was burning into yours.

'and i will find out who you are.'

you stood there trembling as he disappeared into the forest, your hand rising instinctively to your chest, searching for your heart. unaware you had just changed everything.

"AREA CLEAR!" cortez shouted in the distance. "MEDIC! we need a medic, we have casualties!"

you slid to the ground beside the rock formation, legs finally giving out, weapon falling from nerveless fingers. still without a single shot fired. your hands shook so violently you had to hide them under your knees.

twice. you’d saved Na'vi twice in less than fifteen minutes. Sullys, if you were right. two of Jake Sully's kids.

you probably weren’t any better than Jake Sully had been back then.

but when you closed your eyes, all you saw were those amber eyes burning through the smoke. and you discovered, to your horror and fascination, that you had no regrets.

not even a little.

[berryazulerecs]

𝙈𝙚𝙩𝙠𝙖𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙖

Tonowari

Ronal

Tsireya

Ao'nung

Roxto

[berryazulerecs]

𝙊𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙠𝙖𝙮𝙖

Jake Sully

Neytiri

Neteyam

Lo'ak

Kiri

Spider

[berryazulerecs]

𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨

Disclaimer (controversial) - I have not watched the show and have no real intention to, I just like reading the fics, do what you will with that

𝙎𝙩𝙚𝙫𝙚 𝙃𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙩𝙤𝙣

𝙍𝙤𝙗𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙡𝙚𝙮

𝙅𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝘽𝙮𝙚𝙧𝙨

𝙅𝙞𝙢 𝙃𝙤𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙧

[berryazulerecs]

𝘼𝙫𝙖𝙩𝙖𝙧

Disclaimer - I am yet to watch A3 but there may be fics with A3 spoilers, I will try to indicate

𝙊𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙠𝙖𝙮𝙖

𝙈𝙚𝙩𝙠𝙖𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙖

𝙈𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙠𝙬𝙖𝙣

𝙁𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙋𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙤𝙧𝙖

RDA

[berryazulerecs]

𝑴𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕

Avatar

Shadowhunters

DC

Stranger Things