Terran Gets Owned By Demons, Act I: Demons are Unbreakable.
It was a normal day in Stormwind. The Stormwind City Watch were using their misappropriated tax funds to buy a water ski. The water ski was blue and gold and said “Raiz taxez” on the side of it because they wanted enough money to buy one for everyone on the guard.
(continued below oK)
“Um, this is wrong.” Terran said showing up with his nightstick. He had just finished using it to smack around some potted plants that were out of line. He broke them. This was his justice.
“Stormwind Law Paragraph B part 2 section 9 level 4 CUH-LEARLY states that the guard will NOT buy a water ski and ask for high taxes.” He yelled at all of the cadets and all of the privates (lol, privates) and all of the sergeants and even a few other animals and stuff that were just minding their own business. One was probably a druid.
All of the guards cried all at once and marched inside to do PT. 100 sit ups, 100 push ups, and 100 Lloydies. You don’t want to know what Lloydies are.
“Boo, hoo!” They all cried. Terran Lloyd was outside though. He was a Knight now and he was using his power to have the water ski all to himself. The Knight-Captains were in sensitivity training that day because they said demons were bad and had to be reeducated. Terran Lloyd did not go, he cited Stormwind Law Paragraph G Part 9: Anyone who has a hat cannot go indoors, therefore entry into a room is unjust, so sayeth the law.
“Fucking sweet.” Terran Lloyd said really loudly. That was his catchphrase. When he was knighted he yelled at it Tatterbum and Morrowgroan. That’s what he called them by the way. He was kind of a tyrant.
Anyway, so Terran lloyd was on his water ski and was thinking about getting a pontoon boat just for his hat. Why not, he was almost king anyway. That’s when the demons showed up.
“Oh no!” Terran Lloyd crowed. “Not the demons, they’re going to fuck my plans up.” He loved saying the F word almost as much as he loved the shush word. He was the one who empowered that curse by the way. “Don’t kick my ass or I’ll throw you in jail along with your smart, intelligent, kind, wholesome, rich, pretty, tall, stylish, superior boss. Why? I am jealous.”
“Please reconsider.” Stimmy said. She was that boss that was just mentioned BTW. “Actually, don’t.”
So the demons kicked Terran Lloyd out of Stormwind and they were all given the rank of Knight-Manager, something Terran Lloyd wouldn’t see because he was currently living like a wild man in Stranglethorn. No one would recognize him, he was crazy and ate berries.
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