Bird Buns & Jayfish

Lexxi | Pan-Demisexual | She/Her | DC Trash | Spoiler blog | Hufflepuff | Current hyperfixation: Stranger Things #jaydickhell

[merletka]

Does anyone remember my Jason adopts an ugly cat au??? I came back with part 2 all of a sudden hah

Part 1 here

[animatedjen]

fun fact: normally stim canisters are thrown into the air for Cal to grab, but if his hands are full, BD will administer the stim himself :)

[the-lost-seven-7]

scream au (again)

[blogalahezy]

[pukicho]

If I wasn’t so sleepy you’d all be soo fucked

[noobkiller2009]

Just sleep

[pukicho]

There’s no fucking way that works

[kingcatnine]

they should make 5 hour calm its like 5 hour energy but you get calm. sold unregulated in gas stations please

[mintykiwi]

[mintykiwi]

EVERY YEAR

[fairycosmos]

for about a month in the early 2010s people used to say things like climate change is real and gay people deserve rights. does anyone remember this

[playtokens]

[tinybed]

bastard

[ewfadsasddsdasd-deactivated2018]

he’s just a baby please

[tinybed]

baby bastard more like

[hoziersgirlfiend]

its he..

[tinybed]

more bastardous than ever….

[i-am-a-fish]

If you are Julius Caesar, DO NOT READ!!!

(TRUST. we are planning something cool - but it's a surprise so don't read. trust.)

do I have to bring a knife or will there be extras I'm very sorry I waited so long to ask

[unlimited-nobu-works]

the floating head of wisdom

[toe-fingerman]

Please don't fall victim to internet misinformation. There is no floating head. It's a regular horse, it's neck is just hidden due to the position of the camera. I made an image to help you understand the what's actually going on.

[pride-knightess]

Thank you for the clarification

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

of course the worst thing about Gotham (2014-2019) is that it's complete schlock that doesn't even have a point of view, let alone a purpose beyond juicing the IP for lazy views, but the second worst thing is that it creates a setting in which Jimbats is fucking unconscionable

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

the third worst thing is of course Jeremiah

[birdbunsjayfish]

Me being the only person in this world apparently that liked Jeremiah 😭😭

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

NASA took a pic of the dark side of the moon fyi

[marlynnofmany]

Yeah, isn’t that a cool picture? It’s the one someone showed me to point out what color the moon really is compared to the Earth! They both have the same amount of sunlight on them here.

The moon’s not white! It’s concrete-gray! It only looks so shiny when compared to the void of space!

I love learning things I didn’t expect to learn. Like when I learned that it’s called the “dark side” of the moon because it’s the side we don’t see, not because sunlight never hits it.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

she's mooning us

[nealashitposts]

So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry.

So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful.

She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal.

He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet...

"Oh you have a dick?"

"... yeah."

He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says

"Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"

And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride.

My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can't please my girl, but I'll show them!"

[nealashitposts]

I do feel the need to add that later he excitedly tell the group that as a straight guy, he never thought that skill would be useful outside hotdog eating contests.

[hyperrbolic-orange]

"Man its too bad that im straight since I've got like no gag reflex and all."

"Honey, I must tell you, i am in fact trans and I have not had bottom surgery."

"My god... everything's coming up Jason."

[dancinbutterfly]

Pure of heart dumb of ass hetero of sexual

[kittyhalk]

Warding off the oncoming depressive episode by reading about very old tortoises

[kittyhalk]

Pleased to report that the 190 year old tortoise is a gay icon

[kittyhalk]

Jonathan is the oldest known land animal btw. I need everyone to know that the oldest animal alive on land is a gay tortoise

[queer-joy-detector]

Queer joy detected!

[lososandra]

Мои хорошие 🤲

[pseudophan]

girl get a grip 😭

[pseudophan]

girl GET a GRIP