evy jane

FARAWAYGIRL1990////////////////////// singer, co-writer, co-producer of //////EVY JANE music /// pro screwhead // boboeyes // faerie mind traveller///// +LET LOVE ECLIPSE+

[boboeyes]

people have asked me for the lyrics to ohso - which is a song i wrote in 2011, but i never wanted to post them because they are so weird and i was so mumbly and they are overly poetic for a pop song.  they reference deep water, visions i've had, and menstrual blood lol.  maybe you will get them if you are like me.  but it is basically a song about the painful transmutation that occurs between childhood and "womanhood".  the woman i see out my window is the one i knew i could be but i also saw that she was the mother set ablaze and misunderstood by a world that values her less than it should.  so there was a fear there, and it made me mean.  i wrote ohso to acknowledge the perpetrator in me.

here's the cute poppy remix

https://youtu.be/yAZ6Wg5lf1Q

here's the words

lyrics to OHSO:

there’s a woman out my window she’s been floating there for days into the bend of tracking lines she is the matron set ablaze

though i feel it washing to me like the rise from greeny deeps she sees the struggle and the wane, ink in the wetness of my sleeps

find my mind between my meanest askings cause i know just what is good for me knock out all my wisdom teeth to feed me you can tell me almost anything

and the move is so violent as is the slouch which curves my back slouch which curves my obsessive and tricky oh, my dark and my light

stream-wading over the copper arms swaying after the line where is my heart in the offer when comes the rest of my mind stream-wading over the copper arms swaying after the line where is my heart in the offer when comes the rest of my mind

find my mind between my meanest askings cause i know just what is good for me knock out all my wisdom teeth to feed me you can tell me almost anything

[boboeyes]

CANTO-POP STAR ANITA MUI

[boboeyes]

Just booked a flight to LA ooooh I've got sth up my sleeve 😏😋😉😂😇😅🤓

[c1995o1-deactivated20161018]

tbh if ur a toxic person, that’s going to manifest in ur execution and application of ur politics, no matter how “good” they are

please remember that abusive people frequently make their way into radical spaces. please remember to always be critical of the discourse in these spaces, because the political leanings of a community in no way guarantee the “virtue” or quality of the discourse

[seebytouch]

[boboeyes]

LADY DOLL

Sometimes I get this creepy feeling that some yt people wanna treat me like their lil Asian sidekick! Lol ugh... or they act like they want to adopt me as a pet.  I felt this “vibe” spontaneously from the core of me -- I didn’t even know that the “asian sidekick” vibe is sth that happens to MANY other asian ppl, not just me!!  It’s a micro-aggression and it keeps me distant and disconnected from friends whom I really love.  It needs to be unlearned.  If you treat me like a pet, you won’t see me.  If I’ve been colding you, thas prolly why lol.

I’m so exhausted by teaching ppl about systems of oppression that I will straight up disappear on your ass, and it’s easy for me! But I’m a very forgiving person bc I’m both yella AND white I can see both sides, so I can see that the pet thing is supposed to be cute and nice and maybe someone is just trying to relate to me, but I’ve learned it comes at a price, from a selfish place. It is most troublesome bc yes, I am very <3 adorable <3 , but -- I ACTUALLY HAVE AGENCY OF MY OWN!  Loving someone can become abusive when you try to control them.  Treating someone like a cute thing that does what you desire is objectification.  Objectification is the first chamber of violence and if you don’t take that seriously then congrats, you’re a bad person!

I’M NOT A DOLL!

I actually knew this creepy French guy who had a thing for Asian Real Dolls (look it up) and who was making a horror film about them when I lived in Buenos Aires.  He had all these catalogues and doll parts that he brought from Japan.  I was 19, fresh out of the forest, and had very low self-esteem.  I was so naive that I was actually shocked when he molested me and said it was because he was in love with me (um, so?) but in hindsight It’s so obvious to me that he was unconsciously acting out his ASIAN REAL DOLL FANTASY thru me. Which is so abhorrent because it's a fantasy that lead to someone ATTACKING ME with his face and hands but I'm supposed to take it as a compliment.  DON’T YOU FUCKING GET IT?  FUCK YOUR ASIAN FETISH, YOU DISGUST ME, TRULY.

I may also just have some sort of doll-based trauma stemming back to childhood when my sister convinced me that my terrifying porcelain doll would come to life at night and kill me if I didn't kiss it on the cheek before bed. 

Wait I think I digress... so Asian women are exotified and told they should be flattered, but we’re actually just getting raped and killed at higher rates for it? 

In a Spokane serial murder trial I read about, the perps were targeting women based particularly on the fact that they were Asian (ie: race-based violence!).  The women were chosen because they were Japanese, and the perps wanted to rape and torture them because they had ‘submissive asian fantasies”.  Tell me again that stereotypes are not perilous.

So in this case, the judge decides to send the message to society that race-based violence committed against Asian women is not important enough to be called the fucking HATE CRIME that it is -- BECAUSE “THE MURDERER SEEMED ACTUALLY QUITE TAKEN WITH HIS VICTIMS”. Boom.  So fucked. As if.  Murderer gets a chiller sentence because he didn’t HATE his victims, per se, he loved them!  He was nice!  FUCKING MURDER ME WITH YOUR LOVE I’M YOUR LADY DOLL

And I kinda feel the need to disclaim:  this is by no means the most dire issue facing Asian women -- I'm ranting bout micro-aggressions I experience but it's not even a tiny bit of what South Asian and Muslim women are having to deal with right now [passes the mic]. Ay I'm so exhausted and anxious allthetime. Thank gawd I'm a corny-ass hippie deep inside so I have a surplus of chill in my cranky old soul cuz this white supremacist world has never been for me *_* rant over #bye

[arabellesicardi]

'banana' magazine shines a light on asian creatives | read | i-D

Co-founders Vicki Ho and Kathy Tso discuss media representation, Aziz Ansari, and what’s in store for issue two.

[lonequixote]

golden snub nosed monkey

[podencos]

Me too

[micdotcom]

Watch: Wanda’s brother is a living example of this racial double standard.

[girthakitt-blog]

can we stop calling fat girls who date conventionally attractive thin dudes “lucky”.

[bombmagazine]

Posing contradictions through art functions as something like an immune system—it sounds an alarm and acts as a catalyst for consciousness.

Leigh Ledare, from his conversation with Chris Kraus in BOMB 132 (via bombmagazine)

[moodhut-deactivated20190222]

Soon coming

[wocinsolidarity]

When Forgiveness Isn’t A Virtue - The Establishment

Sometimes the shame of being unable to forgive compounds the original pain.

As a survivor of sexual abuse and assault, and as an advocate for survivors of abuse and assault, I hear a lot about forgiveness. I am forwarded stories on the power of forgiveness, I’m lectured on the need for forgiveness, I’m offered lessons on forgiveness. 

But I also hear about forgiveness from survivors of physical, sexual, and emotional abuse.

“How can I forgive?” They ask.

“Why can’t I forgive?” They also ask.

“What is wrong with me?” They ask even more.

My own lived experience and the experience of reading hundreds of letters from survivors of abuse has led me to this conclusion: You don’t have to forgive anybody ever. Further, forgiveness can be bad for you.

You don’t have to forgive anybody, ever.

We often talk about healing from wrongs committed against us as being a part of the revenge/forgiveness binary. Your base nature wants revenge for the crimes against you. You obsess and rage and it causes you pain. The only way to free yourself from this is forgiveness; you must let go of the harm done to you and to wish those who harmed you well, therefore releasing the both of you from the prison of anger and pain. Some take it even further to say that you must push past forgiveness and even into reconciliation—making amends with the person who harmed you, so you and the person who harmed you can become better people.

This may work for the person who stole your laptop—maybe even the person who stole your boyfriend—but is this really the only path to healing when you have been abused? When you have been assaulted? When someone you love was murdered? When your rights have been repeatedly violated? When your trust has been repeatedly or grievously broken?

When you have been grievously wronged, the pain it causes is real, and your feelings of hurt, anger, and fear are valid. In Psychology Today, Deborah Schurman-Kauflin PhD. reminds us that “Grieving and healing is a slow, slow process that cannot be hurried or skipped.” Not only is this process slow, it’s unique to each person and situation. You may have times you wish for revenge, times you wish for reconciliation, times you are numb with depression, times you are paralyzed with fear. That is all valid. But trying to push through all of these to get to forgiveness short-circuits the very necessary healing process.

[sonofbaldwin]

When Madonna came out with her hit ‘Vogue’ you knew it was over. She had taken a very specifically queer, transgender, Latino and African-American phenomenon and totally erased that context with her lyrics: ‘It makes no difference if you’re black or white, if you’re a boy or a girl.’ Madonna was taking in tons of money, while the Queen who actually taught her how to vogue sat before me in the club, strung out, depressed and broke. So if anybody requested 'Vogue’ or any other Madonna track, I told them, 'No, this is a Madonna-free zone! And as long as I’m DJ-ing, you will not be allowed to vogue to the decontextualized, reified, corporatized, liberalized, neutralized, asexualized, re-genderized pop reflection of this dance floor’s reality!

DJ Sprinkles, “Ballr/Madonna-Free Zone” (H/T Vincent Bernard)

DJ SPRINKLES MY HERO

[danielle-mertina]

It’s annoying when ppl say feminism is for white women and womanism is for Black women because Black feminism exists!

And it’s not just tacking an adjective in front of feminism. It’s a specific ideological and sociopolitical movement and a particular framework of understanding the intersectional oppression faced by Black women. Womanism (as a term) comes from Alice Walker in 1979 and derives from Black feminist theory.

[likethebrimofahat-deactivated20]

Thank you! I’m so tired of being guilt tripped for not referring to myself as a womanist.

[danielle-mertina]

Womanism is very spiritual. And there’s an emphasis on “women’s culture” and “women’s emotional flexibility” (if you read the actual definition written by Alice Walker). As a Black feminist, I don’t believe that these things are natural. I think they’re socialized.

Womanism is also focused on not just Black women but Black men as well. Which is valid but not really my thing. Whereas Black feminism acknowledges that patriarchy means that Black men oppress Black women and has brought us concepts like “Black male privilege"…that isn’t so clear in womanism where you’re supposed to focus on the “wholeness” of Black ppl.

Black feminism is more sociopolitical in focus. More focused on legal and economic rights as well as on “controlling images” (to reference Patricia Hill Collins) against Black women.

One isn’t better than the other but they’re certainly quite different. But I don’t think a lot of ppl online define womanism the way Alice Walker did. They kinda subsume the term into what’s actually Black feminism and forget Black feminism ever existed.

I think womanism is in part so attractive online because it is etymologically different than the word feminism which has a very bad rap. But from what I see, most folks calling themselves womanists are probably more ideologically in line with Black feminism.

[beyonslayed]

No shade but millenials obsession with having every oppressed group represented in ‘media’ (mainly TV shows, movies, and music) is lowkey rooted in assimilationist politics and wanting to be accepted by hegemonic power structures

[geekremix]

No asian woman has ever won “best actress” from the academy awards. 

Just nominated. Once. In 1935. 

If there are no leading roles “written” for asian women, that is still a problem. 

A leading role doesn’t have to be written to be asian. Or black. Or any other race. A POC can just be a person, you know. A person in a leading role. 

And I’m tired of real life POC people being played by white actors, taking that opportunity away from POC actors and actresses. 

The wiki page used to say “natalie portman” as a winner. Which has since been corrected. Natalie Portman is a wonderful person and amazing actress, but she isn’t asian. I don’t know why she was put there.

[wocinsolidarity]

!!!!