it has been 5 years since i last stopped by. i can't believe that this archive.. this time capsule of the person i once was still exists here on the internet. that people still come here despite me leaving so many years ago. i started this account when i was like 13 years old and i'm turning 25 in just a few days. i never believed i would live past 18.
this will likely be the last time i come here and take a look back on my life. it's been a very hard thing to process, as i go back trying to save some of my old writing and graphics for nostalgia sake. this blog was started by a deeply unhappy little girl. while many parts of this weird side of the internet fostered many negative emotions and drama for me, it was also a place i used to call home.
i can't even begin to fathom the hours i spent here, or the blood, sweat, and tears i put into this silly little blog. in the grand scheme of things, boofrp was only just a phase of my life. but i still remember the girl i used to be and carry her with me everyday. without her, without this blog, and without you, i wouldn't be the woman i am today.
everything and nothing has changed since those days. but i like to think i've gotten better. the things i know now, the things that i have learnt and the person i have become all trace back to that same little girl from all those years ago. the only regret i have is not being kinder to her.
to this day, i still love to write. i'm currently completely a bachelor of arts degree, majoring in creative writing. this wasn't part of my plan all those years ago, but right now i feel like it's what i am supposed to be doing. seeing lost pieces of writing that i wrote back then has only made that clearer to me. creating has become my reason to live. i am by no means successful today. i still have many faults. i'm still fighting the same demons that haunted me back then. but i think little bo - jordy - would be proud of me. and i hope that you, whoever has stuck around and is reading this, whoever remembers that little girl too, is also proud to have come this far.
i'm still writing the stories i started back then. the pieces of me that i scattered across this blog and this community, that i shared with friends and foes. they all live in my heart. they're all still alive and well. they'll have their day in the sun someday. at times, they were all i had. these stories never left me lonely and continue to inspire me today.
there are many people i am sure are no longer here, who don't remember me, or have made a point to forget, that i still think about often. whether they helped keep me together or tore me down, it doesn't matter now. but if you recognize the username, i hope you will say hi.
boofrp was the first place i ever felt needed. where i felt like i was actually doing something. that i had something to offer. this space was where i found my first readers. an audience. a community. i will never not be grateful for that.
i miss you all and am endlessly thankful to have been part of your world. i'd love to reconnect with old friends.
