There are things here and I'm sorry

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

How to Flirt

If you need to tell someone they're pretty. "Your face is becoming a problem for me. Please stop making me feel emotions".

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Motivational speeches I need to see

How to cope with being right all the time. Why you shouldn't murder people in real life. How to eat shit and look good doing it.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

How to ask someone to make out

Mind if I softly chew on your mouth flaps? Or Can I kiss your puckered starfish? NOTE: The second proposal might in fact make them think you are talking about their butthole. This might taint your experience.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

How to do college and probly other things

Eat crackers and be sad.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Wind blows.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

You ever feel like some of the people in your life are npcs. They have repetitive dialogue like, "How are you today" and "Stop breathing on me". It's strange.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Me explaining rain to children

"Well you see, sometimes the sky bleeds"

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Night life

Sometimes nightlife is depicted glamorously but the truth is that it's eating oatmeal at 1:30am cause you have no control of your life anymore and your eyes are crusted over due to shame and fluorescent lighting.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

I just wanted tea but they wouldn't share

Dreams are weird. One moment I'm getting attacked by a bunch of gnomes and then I wake up irritated and confused.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

"May I gradually secrete fluids in your presence" -an idea of how to ask someone to hang out. If you want something saucy you can ask, "May I actively secrete fluids in your presence"

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Note to self: Dream about awesome space adventures, do not dream about attending seminars on proper q-tip use.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

I don’t like being sick. I feel too much pressure from trying not to breath on anyone.

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Do you ever just wake up and decide to eat corn until you hate yourself? 

[botherednothot-generallyconfused]

Life

I will have you know I’m perfectly incapable of making my own decisions