Brain Expert @brain-expert-official - Tumblr Blog

I would like to note that all posts in this blog are Fake and Not Real and Satire and I am lying on the internet for fun. I will otherwise commit to the bit here out of principle.

#disclaimer #not brain #Edit: I will additionally mark posts as unreality from here on out because I don’t wish to scare anyone. Ok that’s all I love you bye

BRAINS ARENT EVEN REAL YOU ARE SUCH A LIAR !!!!!!!!

Oh yeah!??!!!!! Then how do I look at them every single day??? What, pray tell, do I preform my numerous surgical operations on at my very real and official discount brain surgery job?????? Get away from me and never speak to me again.

#Advice: just because you don’t possess something doesn’t mean it’s not real #brain #unreality

A study just found that if you get bricks dropped on your head it’s actually bad for your brain health and can have negative consequences such as, killing you!

#brain #information #brick

Fun fact! Instead of a certain environment killing machine which uses up millions of gallons of water, you can generate words and ideas and stories and images with the amazing power of your brain instead! And it’s way more fun also!!

#brain #Also that way you won’t get Alzheimer’s or dementia because you stopped using your brain and it turned to mush! Yay!!!! :)#anti generative ai #fuck generative ai

We have just recently found out that hamsters don’t possess an amygdala (responsible for sensing danger) and that horses have a minimum of seven.

#brain #fun facts #that’s why they’re like that #unreality

Fun Brain Fact Number #5: a beetle 🪲 is a type of bug 🦗🪰🐜 which is why it looks like that

#brain #fun facts #neuroscience

If you want to you can download The Sims 2 (2004) into your brain and nobody can stop you

#brain #life pro tips #life hacks #advice #Or any of the sonic games but never both at the same time #unreality

Next year they will release new lobe that lets you read 0.0001% faster!

#brain #It costs only five dollars!#That’s a steal!#unreality

They’re creating something called the Evil Medulla and it just kills you. Or so I’ve heard.

#brain #neuroscience #unreality

Brain Fun Fact Number 24: At any given moment, you brain could have up to five trillion weevils in it. Especially if you have rice or other grains in there!

#brain #fun facts #unreality

Three monster energy drinks and a sleeve of Oreos for dinner is the best way to quickly improve brain health

#brain #life hacks #advice #You may experience heart palpitations but that is fine since no one has ever died from their heart not working #Soup is also good by the way

You can take your brain out of your skull and draw stars on it in sharpie to make it look cool and pretty!

#brain #life pro tips #life hacks #unreality

The ultimate outcome of microplastics is that the brain will turn into a bunch of small plastic beads. We’re not sure if that’s good or bad yet though.

#brain #fun facts #unreality

brain-expert-official

I have developed a new brain procedure that puts a hole in the middle of the brain, making it donut shaped. Very fun and whimsical!

sirwombat

Is it safe?

brain-expert-official

It’s definitely one of the top ten safest brain procedures I do as a discount brain surgeon, yes.

#brain #unreality

I have developed a new brain procedure that puts a hole in the middle of the brain, making it donut shaped. Very fun and whimsical!

#Also you can put you favorite cd or dvd in the hole if you want!#brain #unreality

instead of asking chat png or whatever you can ask me questions and you can trust me because I have never lied once in my life and I have several brain science degrees

#anti generative ai #not brain #But it is preferable that the questions are brain related as that is my area of expertise

Things I can cure with my discount brain surgeries!!!

Liver cancer

Night terrors

Fear of sharks

Carpal tunnel

Having blue eyes

hair loss

The ability to feel romantic attraction

Hypertension

Get yours for cheap today !!

#brain #neuroscience #And! I do tattoos if you ask nicely #unreality

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