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@breakfastwiththebeak
Perfect for a 101-Hour Joyride!
Breakfast With The Beak: The Complete 158-Episode Archive, featuring the peculiar investigations and speculations of mysterious rock legends Johnny Goodtimes and Doktor Heisenberg. Download it now for FREE at The Beak or on iTunes!
Whiteboard Whateverday #52!
Episode 158: The Origin of the World
It's the end of our show, and the beginning of everything! We're telling the story of the star stuff that makes up all of us, the generations of stars where those atoms were forged, and the pile of hot rocks that we ended up calling home. And we get in a few last shots at organized religion, proprietary hardware, and terrible rap names. We were trying to be positive, but the rest of the world wasn't making it easy.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 158: The Origin of the World
Original Release Date: 03/30/2014.
Episode 157: Topic Rodeo!
It's our penultimate episode, so we're cleaning house! That means going through every topic left on the list and giving each of them the 8 to 12 seconds of attention they deserve. And why stop there? We're also revealing the contents of our top-secret emergency topics list, reviewing all 156 previous episodes, and - against our better judgment! - reviving a couple recurring characters. Everything we haven't gotten around to doing yet, we do! You're welcome.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 157: Topic Rodeo!
Original Release Date: 03/23/2014.
White Board Wednesday #51!
Episode 156: Strong Bad Email
Hey, remember Strong Bad? If you do, have we got the show for you! If you don't, you're going to learn a lot today. We're taking a voyage through internet history to a time when Homestar Runner ruled the world! When word of mouth mattered more than insincere retweets! When we hadn't yet squandered the promise of new technology! So tune in and find out why your modern conception of fandom is shameful.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 156: Strong Bad Email
Original Release Date: 03/16/2014.
Episode 155: Wesley Willis
Well, it doesn't get much further from Taylor Swift than this. We're taking a harmony joy ride with a rock 'n' roll prophet, searching for meaning in the music of Wesley Willis. Willis taught us all how to battle demons through obscene bestiality ballads and unfiltered autobiography, and we're passing that knowledge on to any listeners who might still be in the dark. Outsider art! Impromptu commercials! The triumph of the human spirit! Where else will you get that?
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 155: Wesley Willis
Original Release Date: 03/09/2014.
Episode 154: Taylor Swift
We're venturing outside our demographic, and Taylor Swift is our guide! Can we learn anything from America's pop-country sweetheart? Or will we just make a bizarre web of connections between her, Michael Bay, J.K. Rowling, Stephen King, and all her ex-boyfriends and then insist it all makes sense? Guaranteed to contain zero Taylor Swift songs; just clips. So don't worry!
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 154: Taylor Swift
Original Release Date: 03/02/2014.
Episode 153: Ebola
This week, we're trying to wring humor out of a really scary disease that we don't know all that much about. And that should be fun, right? We trace the history of the Ebola virus from its humble origins to its brush with fame in the 1990s and beyond, and develop acute hypochondria in the process. Will we somehow include a lengthy digression about juggalos? You know us so well.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 153: Ebola
Original Release Date: 02/23/2014.
Episode 152: The Keebler Elves
In a hollow tree somewhere, elves are baking cookies with magic. At least that's what Keebler's commercials would have us believe. It's a journey into the world of advertising, the darkest corners of fandom, and the office where they decide how many spider parts can legally go into your food. Plus a bunch of crap about sad message boards and an attempt to sell cookies to adults for a change!
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 152: The Keebler Elves
Original Release Date: 02/16/2014.
Episode 151: Dollywood
We're headed down south (in spirit) to pay a visit to Dollywood, the Dolly Parton-est place on Earth! Will we avoid the obvious jokes? Actually yes, because there's a whole lot more to talk about. It turns out Dollywood is a magical place full of grannies and taters, old-timey craftsmen and a man named Big Skillet. So grab some ham 'n' beans, put on your poofiest wig, and join us in a town that is actually called Pigeon Forge.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 151: Dollywood
Original Release Date: 02/09/2014.
Episode 150: Purple People Eater
We all know Purple People Eater, the novelty song. But how about Purple People Eater... the movie? Oh, it happened, and we're spending our 150th episode trying to figure out why. Whether you're a fan of early rock 'n' roll, wacky car wash hijinx, or wiener dogs, there's sure to be something in this movie to upset you. We're pretty sure this is the only film ever to feature Doogie Howser, Enid Coleslaw, and Screech before any of them knew what acting was! Also, there is a horse.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 150: Purple People Eater
Original Release Date: 02/02/2014.
White Board Wednesday #50!
Episode 149: The Manitou
The Manitou! We can't even call it a famously bad film, because it never quite got famous, but we're watching it and discussing it. Thrill to the tale of a fortune-telling Tony Curtis, a shaman in a sad wig, and their slow, confusing battle with a wee magic fellow. Find out what we think about stuntmen in wigs, gratuitous nudity, and the lesser Cthulhu mythos, plus a scene so insane we can't describe it here.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 149: The Manitou
Original Release Date: 01/26/2014.
Episode 148: John Dies at the End
It's one of the great internet success stories: a novel posted on the web, which became a real book, which became a movie. And now John Dies at the End has somehow become this podcast. We're not just reviewing the movie; we're looking into its curious history, debating what it means for internet culture, and taking cheap shots at a bunch of easy targets. And if there's time, discussing the book, I guess.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 148: John Dies at the End
Original Release Date: 01/19/2014.
Episode 147: Vampires and Werewolves
These days, you can't tell a story about one kind of monster without every other kind of monster trying to steal the spotlight. But which creature deserves to have its story told? We're looking at a couple of the most popular, in hopes of finding out how vampires became sexy and how werewolves wound up consigned to the supernatural B-list. Legends are deconstructed, old PC games are praised, and pool cues are broken over heads in what we can only describe as a veritable monster mash. And who doesn't love one of those?
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 147: Vampires and Werewolves
Original Release Date: 01/12/2014.
Episode 146: Bedbugs
We're getting downright educational this week! Bedbugs have made their homes in our fair city, and we have the inside scoop from a real-life ex-exterminator. Where did these tiny bloodsuckers come from? How can you protect yourself? Who can we blame? Guaranteed to feature at least one very uncomfortable host, plus a nice bit about koalas at the end.
Breakfast With The Beak: Episode 146: Bedbugs
Original Release Date: 01/05/2014