No Contact Rule

Hi, I’m 23 from Canada trying to do the no contact rule in order to get my ex boyfriend back. Here shows my struggles and journey

[breakupnocontactrule]

My anxiety is going through the roof today

I spoke to him the other day which has been a set back. I was on day 25 I think. Don’t do it that’s all I can advise, I was doing so well moving on and barely thinking about him. I feel constant sickness and uneasy it’s horrible...

[breakupnocontactrule]

I was with someone for five years.

That’s what hurts the most, the fact that I spent so long with someone and then it disappears into nothing. I didn’t deal with the break up well but I knew it had to happen. I feel confused and hurt but mostly confused because I don’t even know what I want. I’m happy and sad at the same time. I’m free but I do miss him. Do I miss him as a friend? Or do I miss him as something more? I know I’m not I love with him but do I still love him? Do I care about him or am I just jealous because I’m the one who go rejected? This is such a confusing situation and I just need someone to let all this stress go because it’s just all too much.

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 19

Yesterday was good, felt so happy and focused and relieved not to be thinking about him. Reactivated my fb and uploaded a pic but wasn’t sure if I should have as I still want to make him miss me. Kinda sad that he’s decided to reach out considering the way things ended but you know what? Just shows what kind of a person he is, the kind that doesn’t give a fuck about me.

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 18

Hi, so I’ve had a very busy weekend so haven’t been able to post. But guys I am feeling great keeping busy and having fab company honestly helps so much I don’t even think I thought about him until I got back today. But yeah I went over to my mates house as they wanted to cheer me up and my god it did!!!! I feel focused and driven ooooh and I got lucky 😉😉

I feel like I’m moving on and starting to find myself again I got caught up in our relationship I didn’t have anything going on except from us. I’m so excited I feel like me again

[breakupnocontactrule]

I hate him so much for doing this to me, I don’t suffer from anxiety but this is honestly mentally draining

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 17

Okay, I’m feeling okay today but I’m feeling quite anxious and I’m scared the anxiety is gonna take over and make me crack. I’m very busy this weekend and surrounded by a lot of people so hopefully I won’t think about him as much.

Also I broke my social media silence last night. Not on Facebook but on insta and sc I have a few of his friends on there so we will see if it gets back to him...

Also guys although I’m trying to get him back (again) I’m also trying to move on. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket as they say and you don’t know if they will come back. So I have downloaded Tinder and am talking to a lot of people and you know what it is fun and a bit of an ego boost tbh! I had great responses before I even started the app. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there because there are other people that realise your worth.

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 16

Half way there! Feeling positive today and tbh I feel like I don’t even want him back. All the hate and hurt that he has caused me the past few weeks has just built up into nothing. No care no hate no anger just nothing. I don’t know how I feel tomorrow but today I’m feeling great. I did go to my counsellor today and I’m not sure if that helped as it opened the box that I had felt had shut but I am not feeling down. I feel in control again, I’m excited for the weekend as I have such a busy one ahead but yeah atm I’m on a high. I don’t wanna see him and I don’t wanna talk to him and tbh I don’t even care what he’s doing it’s fucking greatttt, we can do this

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 15

Keep having dreams about him which is weird as I haven’t really had many about him so far so I must be thinking about him a lot. Yesterday I nearly snapped and spoke to him but distracted myself by watching YouTube videos of no contact rule and researching how others are coping. Feeling sick but also positive that I can get through this today, hopefully this torture will pay off in the end....

[breakupnocontactrule]

Day 14

Woke up today feeling horrible and had a little cry. Just waiting for him to text me even tho it’s probably not going to happen... completely regret how things ended between up as it was a compelete mess and I ended up drunk not remember what happened and I’m the morning he was very cold towards me. This is honestly the hardest thing that I have had to do but hopefully it will pay off!