let lgbtq authors write about tragedy with lgbtq characters. let them write about death, toxic relationships, abuse. let them write about what it is like to be human without having to worry about “good representation” and bury your gays when the stories they want to tell may include the ugly sides of living.
i’m exhausted of hearing about authors being forced to out themselves when accused of bad representation, queerbaiting, or bury your gays.
i don’t think authors (even lgbtq authors!) are infallible in the way they can portray lgbtq characters, and they should accept criticism but also i’m fucking tired of the concept that Every lgbtq Character needs to be the Pinnacle of Purity otherwise it’s ‘bad representation’
The LGBT+ community really has a problem with this, especially when it comes to real people. This idea that LGBT+ people/characters can do no wrong and they need to be portrayed that way or else it’s toxic and relying on stereotypes.
"We dont want refugees coming to this country" buddy your country (any country that has had a military presence in Afghanistan in the last 20 years) is the one who made the refugees. If you dont want refugees then perhaps refrain from making them.
"But refugees are expensive" the us has spent $300 million per day for the last 20 years on their war in Afghanistan. Thats trillions of dollars, all up. Conversely, it costs around $15,000 USD to to settle a single refugee and they then traditionally make far more money for their new country by generating taxes than was needed to settle them in the first place. The US could afford to settle 20,000 refugees per day for 20 years, and you would only just break even on the amount of money you've spent in Afghanistan. Other countries have spent far less than America, but can still afford,, many times over, the $10-15 thousand it costs to settle a single refugee.
"But refugees threaten the culture of my country." Hey. Come here. Lean in closer. Countries like America, Australia, loads of parts of Europe? Only have the culture we have now because of immigrants. Theres loads of immigrants in your country already, and they don't "ruin" anything; they add to the culture. You're just xenophobic and racist.
"But they'll bring Bad Muslim Law here" bro they are literally fleeing from the goddamn fucking Taliban. You think if they were pro-stoning women in the street that they would be fleeing the people who are pro-stoning women in the street?? Shut your racist ass up.
"But islam is a bad religion" no it isn't. There are bad muslim people, sure, but hey, guess what? There's a shittonne of bad Christians, too, so "terrible awful human being who subscribes to an extreme view of [religion] but doesn't actually speak for the whole [religious] community" is not a thing thats restricted solely to Muslims. Look up the atrocities that have been committed in the name of Christianity. There are a lot.
"But what if there are terrorists hiding among the refugees?" You would deny hundreds of thousands of terrified people the opportunity to not be victims of the Taliban, because you're scared one of them might be a terrorist? When our kids can look up any kind of bullshit on the internet and decide to go to school with a knife? When we have white folk who were born and bred here who commit crimes that, were they committed by a brown person, would be called an act of terror? Get your shit together.
In summary: every single country that's had a hand in the Afghan war should be accepting unlimited numbers of refugees from Afghanistan.
the words immigrant and refugee aren’t dirty words.
I would love to see people use this word more in their writing. Don’t say your character ‘moved to the states’, say they immigrated. Don’t say your muse ‘fled danger’ say they sought refugee status in another country or are a refugee.
Despite what politics tell us, these words are not dirty.
Call your muses refugees, call them immigrants. These words are not negative, they tell a story.
As someone who works in the refugee and immigration system in Canada, we know that many people hesitate to immigrate and seek refugee status on the basis of the stigma around it alone. Especially recently.
I just think it would be cool to see more writers use those words unapologetically and in a positive manner because there’s already so much negative stigma around immigrants and refugees.
depending on your muse’s experience, some of these things may be different. but for those of you who have muses that ride horses or are around horses’s here’s some things to avoid, some things i encourage, helpful terms, useful facts, and some debunked myths.
disclaimer right off the bat: everyone in the equestrian community has various opinions on these things. the opinions below are from my 15+ years in the equestrian community. equestrians who are writers: keep it civil for once in our lives, yeah???
this list is very long so it is under a read more! feel free to message me if you have specific questions.
TERMS.
click the word for an image or video of the mentioned term!
➜ halter or head collar. a fabric, leather, or rope that attaches to the horse’s face. used for generally leading horses. removed when riding or in the paddock. horses should never be in a paddock with a halter on.
➜ leadrope. a leather or rope lead that connects to the halter and if used to lead the horse around when not riding.
➜ bridle. leather head collar with a bit attached to it that is used for riding. you can buy bitless bridles (img) with do not require putting a metal thing in the horses mouth. has reins that attach for steering asistance.
➜ bit. a piece of metal that goes in the horse’s mouth. there thousands of types of bits, all with varying degrees of harshness.
➜ saddle. the thing you sit in! there are various types of saddles for various disciplines as well.
➜ girth or cinch. the horse belt. it keeps the saddle in place while riding. it’s very important this be tight. if it is loose, the saddle will move and cause discomfort on the horse’s back.
➜ english. a blanket term for a style or riding that includes: dressage, jumping, hunting.
➜ western. a blanket term for a style of riding that includes: rodeo, barrel racing, reining.
➜ tack/tacking up. the term used to describe horse equipment such as a saddle, bridle, girth, horse boots. the term tack up or tacking up is used to describe the process of prepping a horse for the act of riding. tacking up includes grooming, putting on the saddle and bridle, and checking the horse for any injuries before the ride.
➜ dressage. a discipline of riding that requires a horse to be in intense physical fitness. it is what you would call ‘horse dancing’. it’s a very difficult and complex discipline and the winner if chosen based on judges scores.
➜ western pleasure. a discipline who’s goal is to keep the horse at a slow, extremely controlled, and relaxed state while performing various movements. you want the horse to look like a ‘pleasure’ to ride –– pun intended. the winner is chosen based on judges points and scores.
➜ barrel racing. a discipline of riding in which riders run their horses as fast as possible around 3 barrels in a specific pattern. the winner is decided by the fastest time.
➜ reining. a discipline of riding in which the goal is to demonstrate a horse’s ability to slide to a stop, perform specific patterns and movements, all with the degree of difficulty steadily increasing. the winner is chosen based on a point system delivered by the judges.
➜ show jumping. a discipline in which riders are tasked with jumping very high jumps with their horse. the goal is to have the fastest time without any ‘faults’. faults include knocking jumps over, the horse not jumping (also called refusing), or taking too long to jump the course. the winner is chosen based on best time with the least amount of faults.
➜ hunter. a discipline where riders run a jumping course that have smaller jumps. the goal is to keep a consistent, relaxed pace, and you are judged on your overall position, the horse’s relaxation, and overall performance. the winner is chosen based on judges scores.
➜ crop. the whip that some riders use. it’s short and stubby. this type of whip is used in jumping disciplines typically.
➜ dressage whip. a long whip that is used to gingerly tap the horse in specific areas to communicate affectively. horses are rarely slapped with this kind of whip.
➜ spurs. metal prods that are attached to the rider’s heel. commonly used in all disciplines, but if used improperly can cause damage to the horse.
➜ farrier. the hoof specialist. they trim and shoe the horses’ hooves! most horses see a farrier every 6 weeks, but some might see them every 4 weeks, or even 8 weeks. it depends on the horse’s needs.
➜ coach. someone who coaches the rider through their riding. the coach is responsible for teaching the rider the proper techniques, as well as correcting errors in the riders position and techniques. this is how a rider learns to ride.
➜ trainer. someone responsible for training the horse. trainers often deal with young horses who are beginning their training, or horses who have some problematic or dangerous behaviours that need to be ‘retrained’.
➜ stallion. a male horse who still has the ability to reproduce. they are often very high strung, hormone driven, and typically more pushy and more likely to bully other people and horses.
➜ mare. a female horse. mare’s are known for being more ‘moody’ but this is not always the case. a mare is never ‘spayed’ the same was a female dog can be. all mares will still have normal and active hormones.
➜ broodmare. a mare who’s main job is to produce offspring. a mare will be pregnant for an entire year before giving brith. they will also spend close to 6 or 7 months after the baby’s birth raising the foal. baby horses learn about being a horse through their mother.
➜ gelding. a male horse who has been ‘neutered’ (in the equestrian industry it is called ‘being gelded’). These horses are often mild mannered and very tame. most male horses will be geldings.
➜ foal. a baby horse! once the baby is about a year old, it is no longer called a foal, but rather a yearling!
➜ colt. a male baby horse.
➜ filly. a female baby horse.
➜ cross ties. two leadropes attached to the halter to keep the horse standing in place. not all horses like crossties. they are often used for grooming and tacking up as well as vet and farrier visits.
➜ feed. often a mixture of grain or chopped hay, feed is a typical way to provide horses with supplements and medication they need to stay healthy!
➜ stall. a sheltered section attached to a barn where a horse can live. stalls will have fresh water, and hay at all times. they are also a place to tack up a horse for a ride.
➜ paddock. a smaller, enclosed space for a horse to be outside with other horses. often paddocks do not have a lot of grass for grazing and will have big bales of hay in them as well as a water troff.
➜ pasture. a larger, enclosed space with grass for grazing with other horses. pastures are often more favourable as they provide the horse more space to run.
AVOID.
➜ “they kicked the horse to go faster”. equestrians who know what they’re doing do not kick horses. to ask a horse to move forward/go faster, you squeeze with your calves against their sides for a few seconds, and then once the horse goes faster, you release the tension in your calf.
➜ “they pulled back on the reins”. this isn’t how you ask a horse to stop. you ask a horse to stop FIRST by the way you are sitting on their back. you tuck your hips forward, and put extra weight on the back of the saddle, leaning back slightly. you only pull back on the reins after you’ve put weight in your seat. horse mouths are very sensitive, and you should avoid applying lots of pressure on the face, especially when they have a metal bar in it.
➜ “they pulled the reigns to the left to steer the horse”. Not actually how you steer lmaooo. you steer by using your legs. if you want the horse to go left, you will push them with your right leg and gently put a small amount of pressure on the left rein. some horses are trained to ‘neck-rein’ which is the act of leaning or touching a rein against the side of the horse’s neck to indicate direction, but even that is not ‘pulling’ the reins to steer.
➜ putting the saddle on without grooming the horse. big no no. a horse’s hair and skin is sensitive. if you put a heavy saddle on a horse without brushing them down first you can create sores and skin irritation from the dirt and sweat thats on their coat. all equestrians groom their horses before and after a ride.
➜ get on and go. horses are like people. when they’re about to work out they need to slowly warm up. they need to stretch muscles, they need to have breaks in their work outs to breathe and recover. they need to cool down before they stop work. your muse should never hop on a horse and immediately start jumping or galloping around.
➜ the use of whips and spurs. these are tools and can be used appropriately when taught, but a whip does hurt a horse if you smack them with it. spurs can be used as a tool to better communicate with a horse, but if your muse is just casually riding their horse, there’s a strong likely hood they don’t need them.
➜ walking under the horse’s belly or neck. not recommended at all!! i cannot tell you how many times i’ve been lazy and ducked under my horse’s neck only for them to swing their neck down and bang heads with me. it’s lazy and dangerous. always walk around the front of the horse or the back.
➜ the horse making lots of noises. unlike movies would have you believe, horses don’t make a lot of noise. They snort occasionally, they only whiney if they are calling for another horse. horses don’t whiney when scarred, because it would only draw attention to them from whatever predator they are trying to get away from.
➜ the ‘aggressive horse’ stereotype. this is boring and tired and not accurate. horses are prey animals. the chances of a horse charging at you, going out of their way to run you over, bite you, is low unless you’ve REALLY pissed them off. some horses are kickers and biters, but this is generally from long standing abuse or discomfort or the human not respecting the horse’s boundaries.
➜ every male horse being a stallion. stallions generally cannot be kept with other horses because of their hormones and general aggressiveness towards other male horses. often stallions live very solitary life styles in captivity where they are generally not given horse friends. most male horses in captivity are gelded. unless your muse’s horse is used for breeding purposes, it’s likely going to be gelded. this also varies in certain countries. for example, Spain loves their stallions.
➜ sexualizing the the riding. every equestrian (especially women) will tell you that we are hyper sexualized. constantly. for our riding. because riding involves a lot of hip thrusting and movements, men and other non-riders feel like they can make disgusting and dirty comments at us constantly. i cannot tell you how much sexual harassment and sexualization equestrians get. whats worse, is a lot of riders are underage children. I don’t care if your muse is a man, a woman, or a child –– do NOT sexualize riding. In addition, if your muse is a hyper sexual, do not allow them to sexualize horse riding. it’s really gross and we all hate it. horses themselves are over sexualized, and as equestrians we are victims of this too.
➜ “i’m breaking my horse”/”i broke that horse”. this language is just kind of yucky??? most equestrians don’t like this terminology and it’s an old way of speaking about training a horse that often used methods that today are recognized as abusive and traumatizing to horses. most equestrians would prefer to use ‘I’m starting my horse’ which implies that you are starting to train the horse.
THINGS TO DO.
➜ say ‘door’ while walking through a barn door. this is something that might be different throughout the world, but when you walk through a barn door where horses might be coming in an out, you yell ‘door!’ before you walk through. this alerts other people with horses that someone is coming through. you should do this when leading a horse and when walking by yourself! it’s a basic safety rule that every equestrian is taught.
➜ lead the horse on the left hand side. it’s an old rule thats not really important to follow, but it is still taught (especially to young and inexperienced riders). most horses are trained to have the person leading them on the left hand side, and some might even freak out if you lead them on the right hand side. the left hand side is also the side most people mount their horse from. there are exceptions to this rule, but generally it’s expected that people do everything on the left side –– especially with a horse that is not yours.
➜ touching a horse’s butt while walking behind them. contrary to popular belief, it is generally fine to walk behind a horse, close to their butt. horses cannot see directly behind them or directly in front of them (they have blind spots in their vision) so if your muse does walk around the back of a horse, be sure to mention that their hand rests on the top of the horses butt, and drags along the top as they walk around. the closer you are the the horse, the safer you will be. if you are a few feet away from the butt and they kick, it’s going to hurt a LOT more than if you’re closer because they haven’t built up force behind the kick.
➜ if they own a horse, they should know the breed of the horse. there are tons of horse breeds out there. depending on where your muse is located, some breeds will be more common than others. owners typically know the breed of their horse. age is another one that most owners will know, but horse age isn’t as important as other animals (and most horse people hate when people ask how old a horse is). it’s common to hear someone give an age range of a horse rather than an exact number. ‘he’s somewhere between 13 and 16′, for an example.
➜ knowing the names of body parts. anatomy of a horse is something most horse people will know! but it’s okay for your muse to not know all the technical terms. here’s a simplified horse anatomy chart !
➜ horses are stupid expensive. that isn’t to say that your poor muse cannot have a horse or be a horse back rider. the equipment you need to ride is expensive, but you can get hand-me-downs, secondhand stuff, and the muse can work for a barn in exchange for riding time, and stuff –– but horse ownership is a very costly thing. riding lessons are a cheaper alternative to owning a horse, and is more common than horse ownership. the majority of equestrians do not own their own horse. keep this in mind.
➜ give your muse challenges with horses. horse riding and ownership is never a straight progression line. horses have bad days, so do riders. one day you and the horse might be perfectly in sync, other days you wonder if you even deserve to own or ride a horse. things are challenging in this sport, and your muse won’t always have a perfectly flawless ride every time. make them fall off, make them hurt themselves, make their horse act up. this is just a reality in this industry. nothing is perfect, including your muse.
IMPORTANT HORSE FACTS.
➜ horses are measured in hands or centimetres, never feet. they are measured by the highest point of the withers. you average horse is 15. hands. 16 hands is big. 17 hands is huge. 18+ hands is a fucking monster. ponies are any horse under 14.2 hands. the hands measurement goes as follows: 15.1, 15.2, 15.3, 16, 16.1, etc. You cannot have a 15.4 hand horse. the measurement doesn’t exist.
➜ almost all domesticated horses will have some form of arthritis. horses are meant to roam and walk an insane amount in the wild. unless a horse has acres upon acres of space to roam (which is unlikely in the modern world) a horse will have arthritis. It may not affect them tremendously, and horses who are exercised more (and properly) often have less issues with arthritis.
➜ a horse cannot survive with 3 legs. horses are one of the few animals in the world that require 4 functioning legs to walk and survive. unlike a dog, who can run and play with 3 legs, horses cannot. this is why if a horse breaks it’s leg badly, it often has to be put down. there are a few exceptions, as always, but a horse needs 4 legs to be healthy.
➜ a healthy horse can live until the age of 30 years. there are documented cases of horses living until 40 or even close to 50, but this isn’t common. it’s more common for a horse to die between the 25-30 mark, but 30+ year old horses are very much a thing!
➜ horses can hear the heart beat of a human from 10 feet away. that means they are very sensitive to humans and their reactions to things. if you are stressed around a horse, they will be stressed as well. I have seen people have break downs next to a horse, and the horse display an equal amount of stress. equestrians are often very mindful of their reactions to things, and are forced to manage emotions when around horses. this is why equine therapy is so amazing.
➜ horses can only comfortably carry 20% of their weight. no, it’s not fatphobic to say someone is too heavy for a horse, it’s protecting the horse’s back and muscles from damage. I, myself (who weighs 200lbs), purposefully purchased a horse that is bigger, and my tack that is extremely light to reduce the trauma to my horse’s back. this 20% includes the weight of the saddle. make sure your muse isn’t riding around on a tiny pony’s back for the hell of it –– it’s damaging to them.
DEBUNKING MYTHS.
➜ horses can sleep lying down. they need to sleep lying down to get REM sleep. they don’t need any more than 4 hours of REM sleep a day, and usually will get this type of sleep during the night. but a horse does lay down.
➜ horse shoes do not hurt the horses. if done correctly, the horse should not be in any pain. Think of trimming a horse show like cutting your nail. if you cut too close to the ‘skin’ it will be sensitive and feel funny for a day. This isn’t something that should happen, but it can happen. Shoes being nailed into the foot would be the same as me putting a nail through the tip of your fingernail. You’d feel the pressure of it, but you wouldn’t be in pain.
➜ horses are not stupid. they are actually really smart and can even understand vocal commands like a dog can. some horses even respond to their names! they know how to avoid work when they don’t want to work, they understand how humans work, and some can even figure out how to open doors! they are not stupid animals.
➜ the horse does not to all the work. horse riding uses the same amount of muscles that swimming does. A horse back rider will have a very good core, and leg strength. if you are riding properly, you as the rider can work up a sweat just sitting on a horse at the walk. riding is not just sitting there. if your muse is limp and lifeless on a the horse’s back I can promise you that the horse beneath them will be very uncomfortable. horse back riding is an active activity, in which the rider is NOT a passenger.
➜ horses do not have thick skin. physically their skin is actually thinner than a humans. mentally because they are prey animals, they are easily traumatized. horses who have been hit will remember it, and will flinch or act out accordingly because of the pain. horses being prey animals means they are naturally not going to show weakness because it makes them a target for predators. but horses who are hit hard with whips, spurred or kicked hard, yanked on the face, slapped, etc. will feel that. if it happens repeatedly they will develop trauma quickly.
