The gorgeous Myrtle disperses gorgeous baked goods. Thanks @sugarplumcakesanddesserts !! (at Twilight Night Market)
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The gorgeous Myrtle disperses gorgeous baked goods. Thanks @sugarplumcakesanddesserts !! (at Twilight Night Market)
Amsterdamming & Getting Home
I landed in Amsterdam as a bit of drizzle started happening. I realised the last spot on my summer holiday was not going to be very summery. I'd been stalking the weather of Amsterdam and the weather of Sydney for the week leading up to my arrival in the capital of Dutch debauchery, and learnt that Sydney's winter was a lot warmer than Amsterdam's summer currently. Oh well, Sydney doesn't have as much clogs.
I'd decided that for my last stop I should stay in a hotel. I also dreaded the thought of being in a hostel in Amsterdam, because I would inevitably end up having to help someone who was on a bad trip, or who had gotten themselves mixed up with a prostitute and didn't have the money to pay them or something. So I found a hotel a little out of the centre but not too far out, which had lovely 1970s-style decor. And I don't mean that to sound judgemental, I really liked it. It made me feel like I was Mike Brady on a business trip.
I soon met some old friends in the hotel lobby - Ellen & Susan, two Dutch girls that I had met in Bolivia (on the first day I met them, I vomited in front of them, so this of course resulted in an unbreakable bond of friendship). Neither of them live in Amsterdam, but had travelled from their respectable towns for the afternoon just to catch up with me. We had a drink before they took me walking through the streets of Amsterdam, and I have to tell you it really is a beautiful city. I'm sure many people have told you that before, but I just want you to know that I agree with them. Ellen & Susan showed me the main square, which had way too many pigeons for my liking, so we didn't stay long. They took me to the red light district, which wasn't that exciting considering it was about 4 in the afternoon. A few of the window booths the prostitutes use to advertise themselves in were occupied, but with very bored looking prostitutes. Standing there looking at your nails is no way to sell yourself! You can't rely on your bikini and fake tan to do all your work! While we wandering the red light district, we passed a busy pub. Busy with drunk Englishman. A crowd had gathered at the canal next to it, so we had a look to see what was going on. There was a shoe floating in the water, and a drunk Englishman looking down at it, figuring out how he could reunite the shoe with his one bare foot. He stripped down to his boxers, and with the drunken assistance of his mate, was lowered into the filthy canal water to retrieve said shoe. I don't know if anyone told him he'd be able to buy a cheap pair of shoes from around the corner, but I'm pretty sure he has (even more) diseases now than before he went into that canal water.
Susan, Ellen & I looked at some shops and wandered about some more. They showed me the 'Febo' stores - these are essentially a room of vending machines with hot food in them. You put in your Euros, open the door and get a croquette! A hot one! It may have been there for several hours, but that doesn't cancel out the convenience factor!
We ended up having dinner at a Thai restaurant, as it turns out there's not too many places that serve Dutch food (plus the girls said it was the wrong season for typically Dutch food, which is quite stodgy). After an early dinner and getting all caught up with each other's lives, the girls had to get themselves back to their towns. I stayed in the centre of Amsterdam and looked at more shops and buildings, wondering why nobody was asking me if I was interested in seeing a sex show. Maybe I was looking particularly asexual that evening. Or maybe they thought I was a plain-clothed nun (that's a thing, right?). After my wander I got myself a McFlurry (a traditional Dutch McFlurry....) and went back to the hotel to enjoy the wealth of English channels on the TV. I even treated myself to a bath, lady of luxury that I am.
The next morning I enjoyed the buffet breakfast the hotel provided, for a hefty price, but it was delicious, so I was okay with it. I went down and the woman asked for my surname. I said "Kramer", she said something to me in Dutch. I said, "Sorry?", and she repeated herself in English, "Do you speak Dutch? It is a Dutch name!". I felt like I'd already adequately demonstrated my lack of Dutch speaking skills, but still said, "No I don't, sorry. And my background is German..." Later on I heard a man ask her if they had any English muffins to which she replied, "No. You are in Holland now."
With buffet breakfast in my belly, I set off to get in line for the Anne Frank House. This was the one Amsterdam attraction that everyone I'd asked who'd been here recommended as a "must do". I walked myself there (and passed the "Kramer Antique Store" on my way, so I guess it is a Dutch name too), and found the line incredibly long. I ended up waiting 2 hours to get in, but I wasn't too bothered as I'd been pre-warned about the wait time. Standing and doing nothing isn't really that bad if you know it's going to happen. I eventually got into the house, which was incredibly crowded with people. We shuffled through each room, trying to read the excerpts from her diary and from interviews with survivors that were on the walls. It was hard to take it all in - the fact that two families lived in hiding here for so long - when there was a family of screaming Portuguese children running around behind you. The whole time all I could think was, "I bet Biebs didn't have to share this space with this many people when he came here and wrote that stupid thing in the guestbook". Despite the crowds and the noise, it was a really good thing to visit, particularly as I have read The Diary of Anne Frank.
I did more wandering after Anne Frank, including a spot of shopping and a break for food (standing in line makes you hungry). My next attraction was the Heineken Experience tour. It was a pretty good self-guided tour, with loads of interactive things and tacky photo opportunities. There was one which was 4 different pictures you could pull out to put yourself in (where a bit was cut out). Like giant postcards, I guess. These were pulled out and had giant handles. I noticed there was a camera stand here, so took advantage of my camera's self timer and not having to ask someone to take my photo for me. The line for the photo postcards has grown, so I set up my camera as quick as I can to go off in 10 seconds. I position myself in a tacky pose, looking at the camera, thinking that this must be the longest 10 seconds ever as a crowd of people are watching me pose awkwardly by myself for a self-timed camera. Eventually the camera goes off, and in my rush to grab my camera and get out of everyone's way, I smack my head on the handle that pulls each of the scenes out. And I smacked it really hard. Not wanting to draw more attention to myself, I kept on going until I got about half way up the stairs and slowly realised the amount of pain that I was in. Ouch. I briefly worried about a concussion, and then immediately forgot about that. The accident left a big lump on the side of my head for about three days. Thanks, Heineken. Your two free beer samples almost made up for it.
For dinner that evening I found a cheese shop doing a 2 course dinner special. I ordered that - the first course being a meat & cheese platter. This was delicious. The second was pasta. This was below average. I don't like when I get food in a restaurant that I could do better myself. A little sad as my last meal for the trip, but you can't win them all.
The next morning I had arranged an airport transfer for myself. As the shuttle buses were overbooked, I ended up getting taken by a taxi driver. A very tall Dutchman who thought I was English, and upon learning where I was from, revealed that he is married to a Kiwi girl. He said he had mistaken her for being Australian when they first met and she didn't forgive him for half a year. Then he started talking to me about his time in the Australian outback, which included eating roadkill. The people you meet.
My journey back to Sydney was an incredibly long one. I started it in Amsterdam - a beautiful airport, with the best announcements over the PA system. "Calling Passenger Jenkins flying to Madrid, please go to the gate now, you are delaying the flight." I love this kind of naming and shaming. From Amsterdam I flew to Heathrow (and had the best view of London on the way in) where I'd have to wait 6 hours for my next flight. While I was in Heathrow, I was killing time at an internet cafe, when the line for security had gotten incredibly long. "Worst it's been in 5 years," one Heathrow employee said. As people tend to get a little bit agitated in lines, a big fight between a father & son and an entire family broke out. I'm not sure who started it, but I think its cause was that someone thought someone was pushing someone in the line or something. It took a while for the fight to break up, but it certainly distracted me from the frustration I was feeling at the terrible internet I was using. Eventually security came, followed by the police. But I'm certain all involved missed their flights, which makes it all the better (for me, that is. I suppose the people involved were all quite annoyed about that). From Heathrow I flew to Helsinki with a one-hour layover. Then it was a 12 hour flight to Singapore, which I slept for the majority of. Then I only had a measly 9 hours to kill at Changi airport in Singapore. Luckily, their airport is amazing and I didn't actually get all that bored here. How can you be bored when there's a Sunflower Garden? I bought up my duty free liquor before my 8 hour flight to Sydney.
I've been back for about 3 weeks now (so I'm certain I've forgotten loads of things that probably would've made it into the blogs, had I written them a lot earlier), and I do miss Europe and the travelling. It was a fantastic trip, with so many places to return to. I ate well, I drank well, I got a nice tan and accumulated a lot of new clothing items and jewellery. Oh, and fridge magnets too (very important). I'll have to review the blogs and my photos to work out which place was my favourite, as that's what everyone I speak to wants to know. The other thing they want to know is where I'm going to next. Hold your horses there buddy, I can barely afford to feed myself now after that trip! It was a fabulous two months in Europe, a place I will definitely be returning to. When I can afford it again.
Berlinning
The bus from Prague took roughly 5 hours and left me at a bus terminal that - although I'd never been to Berlin - didn't look like it was in the centre of town. As I'd been a lazy "pay someone to do my hard work for me" tourist in Prague, I decided to find my own way to the hostel in Berlin. As I expected from the German capital, this was super easy, even if I did struggle getting onto a metro train with my suitcase and ended up cutting my finger. Luckily a nice German man helped me haul the big suitcase onto the carriage, although I think he felt a little mislead when I wasn't able to respond to him in German other than a "danke shoen". With a few changeovers, the train brought me to my hostel which could barely be called a hostel, at that. The dorm was only for 4 people and was extremely large with a comfortable bathroom attached. Asides from this, it had its own pool & sauna. Talk about flash-packing.
I'd arrived in the mid-afternoon, so decided to take myself off to the Berlin Zoo for the afternoon. It was an alright zoo, but I thought some of the enclosures were a bit small for the animals contained in them. I walked into one area and saw a crowd of people formed around a cage. Let me dictate to you what went through my head: "I wonder what all those people are looking at? Must be pretty cool. Oh hey, a lion! Wow! With a mane and everything! Ooh and he's in there with a lady lion! It's a bit small in there for them, I'd think. Well I am thinking that. Why is he following her around the room? Animals are crazy. Oh, why is he on top of her now? Oh, oh I see. Wow. Well that didn't last long." I don't know if it's the norm, as this is the only lion sex I've seen (asides from Attenborough), but it lasted all of 10 seconds. And I think I'm being generous. The male immediately fell asleep, spooning a log, while the lady lion paced around the room some more looking extremely frustrated. Poor lady lion.
Asides from the reproductive education, my favourite thing about the Berlin Zoo was the names the animals had been given. They had all been given surnames as well as first names, so you had penguins there named things like Johann Schultz. It made me think the penguin was also an accountant in his down time.
The zoo had a wide collection of animals, but I'd say the one that most impressed me was the hippo enclosure. They had a body of water for swimming that had a glass edge so you could see above and below the murky water, where about 5 hippos were following each other about. They were surprisingly noisy as well, which just made it cooler.
On my way home I spotted a poster at the metro station. It was advertising "CABARET - Das Musical". I made a mental note to find out more. As luck would have it, Cabaret (one of my favourite musicals) was being performed at the moment. I had to go. Especially when I realised that Cabaret is set IN Berlin. What could be more perfect than seeing it IN Berlin? I found out I could get tickets from a tourist office, so set off to do that first thing in the morning. The lady gravely said, "I must warn you, it is all in German," as if that was going to make me completely change my mind. I told her it would be fine, I knew the story so didn't need to understand the dialogue, so she let me buy myself a ticket for that evening.
After the musical ticket purchase, I found myself a walking tour to go on to take in the sights of Berlin. We were a group of maybe 10, led by a really enthusiastic guide from Philadelphia. He showed us all the highlights of Berlin - Museum Island, Brandenburg Gate, the site of the Nazi Book Burning, site where Hitler's bunker was, some of the Berlin Wall, Checkpoint Charlie, the Holocaust Memorial, and loads of other spots that have escaped my memory right now. And he described their history with cocaine-induced levels of enthusiasm. Really. At one point he outlined Berlin's history from medieval times all the way through to the tearing down of the Berlin Wall with maybe two pauses for breaths in between. It was a great tour and a fantastic overview of the city for someone with so little time in it.
After trying to absorb 500 years of history, I decided to take myself to a museum. But not one about Hitler, or the division of Berlin or about dead Jews. I took myself to the Currywurst museum. For those of you that don't know, currywurst is a delicious item of food - it is essentially sausage (wurst) in curry sauce (curry). Despite its wealth of information on the food product, I was a little disappointed in the Currywurst Museum. I felt like it could have set itself up for more tacky photo opportunities. But it did have a couch shaped as a sausage, so I really shouldn't complain. After my free sample of currywurst (in a cup!), I decided to have a sit down in a Starbucks. As I was doing this, the sky decided to shit itself (in the form of rain, there wasn't actual shit falling from above) so that was excellent timing on my behalf. But after I finished my overpriced and over-sugared beverage and had used all the free wi-fi I could stand, I braved the elements and set off for the Checkpoint Charlie museum. Turns out everyone else had decided to claim sanctuary from the rain in the museum, whether or not they wanted to go in there in the first place. So the museum was crowded, which made it difficult to read the essays that had been printed out and stuck up on the walls. I didn't last very long in there.
I did some more walking about before moseying on over to where I would need to be for 'Cabaret' that evening. It was being performed in a tent in the middle of the Tiergarten. It had a restaurant attached, so I had a meal there while I established I would be the only non-German speaker at this all-German production of 'Cabaret'. Fabulous. The seating inside was set up like a dinner theatre, so I awkwardly shared a table with a middle-aged German couple who seemed to be the only people without a lick of English in their mouth. That was okay though, as I was mainly there for the high leg kicks and fishnet stockings. The production was excellent, even if I couldn't understand the dialogue. Some bits were in English - thanks to one of the main characters being American - but I would just laugh along with the crowd at the German punchlines, trying to remember from the movie what the actors could have said. After all, I did look very German, so it would probably be weirder if people caught me not laughing at the funny bits, wondering why I was so closed as to not find the humour in this musical. If this was my first exposure to 'Cabaret', it could have been very confusing not understanding the dialogue. After all, there is an entire musical number where a man in heavy make up dances with someone in a gorilla suit.
After the show I walked my way to the closest metro station through the Brandenburg Gate (to see it lit up at night), and headed back to the hostel, where - despite arriving back at about midnight - I would again be getting home before the others in my dorm were heading out.
The following morning I went to Shoenefeld Airport, which I assume was in what was once East Berlin. It had a very "commie" feel to it, and there was only one toilet for us all to share. After the super fun time there, I got on my flight to my last Europe destination - Amsterdam.
Czech (out) Chick
Firstly, for anyone that's been reading this and is a bit anal with continuity and relevance, I'll apologise for the delay in writing this blog and writing it almost two weeks after the fact. I was just too busy and important to be able to do this earlier. Soz.
When I left you last, I had just arrived at my hotel in Prague, dazzled by its comparative (to hostels) luxury (i.e. I could have a shower and not have to take my change of clothes in with me. Luxury.) After discovering the only channel on my TV I could understand was BBC World, I went for a little wander in search of snacks. The area I was in wasn't that pretty, in the 'New Town', and mostly consisting of fast food joints. I sheepishly took myself into KFC, and entertained the server with my natural English speaking talents. "Ummm.. Twister meal?" "Yes of course ma'am!" (he sensed my English speaking, probably in my impeccable pronunciation of "twister meal"), "You are... American?" "Nope!" (I considered just telling him where I was from in order to cut out this nonsense and get to my chicken, but it had been a while since I conversed with someone - other than the guy that pointed at my face and said "German, German" - so I played along) "Ummm.... England? You are... England!" "Nope. I'm not English either." "Oh! Australia!" "Yeah... you got it. Well done." "Tell me... the kangaroos. They fight you, yes?" "Constantly. All the time." "And you win the fight, yes?" "Of course! Been fighting them all my life." "They fight you like this!" (more of an exclamation than a question, and then he mime-boxed while someone brought over my chicken.) "Thanks," said I. "You're welcome, my Australian girlfriend! See you tomorrow!" This was all a bit presumptuous. I wasn't sure in which part of the exchange we'd started going steady, but he clearly grasped my love for chicken and affinity for the Colonel's goods, so maybe it was meant to be after all. Sadly, I didn't return to KFC the next day for more of this romantic banter. Romanter.
After chicken and familiarising myself with the area a bit, I hopped on the metro and took myself to another bus station. I was heading for Liberec, a town about an hour out from Prague. My friend Veronika, who I worked with at a pub in Randwick (Sydney), is from there and had bought me a bus ticket to go visit her for a brief 3 hours (in order for me to make the last bus into Prague). The bus was super comfortable and even had the ground equivalent of an airline steward. It also had individual screens with things to watch, and a free coffee/tea service - a lot better than most of the airlines I've been on. In a twisted way, I was sad to only have this luxury for an hour. But I was happy to get off the bus to be greeted by Veronika, swooped up in her and her newly-wed husband's car to get a whirlwind 3-hour Liberec experience. We caught up on the past 5 years of each other's lives in the car on the way up to Jested Mountain with Jested Tower on top. The last bit of the road was one way, with the parking lot at top filled to capacity, so we briskly walked up to the top, getting lovely views of the whole area. We got to the top and Veronika asked me if I wanted to try Kofola - a Czech cola. I said yes with no hesitation. She brought me back my beverage, I commented on its flavour saying, "It tastes more like rum & coke than just plain coke". "Yes. Yours I got with rum," Veronika explained. Well that makes sense then. She then asked me, "Do you want a Czech hot dog?". Of course I do Veronika, don't be ridiculous. Basically, if I'm in a different country, and someone offers me something edible, the answer will always be yes. That's either out of being polite (I don't know what happens if I'm in a country where it's impolite to say yes. Mental note - must research) or because I want to try everything. The only real difference between a regular hot dog and a Czech one was that the Czech one wasn't in an open bun, but the weiner (hehehehe. Yes, I'm four.) was inserted (hehehehe) into one a hole (hehehehe) had been cut into. It was good.
After the look-out, kofola and hot dog fun, we raced back down into town to meet Veronika's husband at what she described as a "typical Czech pub", which basically looked like someone's den with more tables in it. Veronika explained, "You will eat typical Czech food. You will have a beer too. A big beer." This is the kind of bossiness I can tolerate. So we ordered a bunch of different foods that I have no idea what their actual names are. One involved raw mince with a raw egg cracked into a dent made, with lots of garlic and other herbs that you mix together and spread onto bread. This was delicious. We got garlic soup. This too was delicious. There was some kind of potato pancake with cabbage and some more garlic, also delicious. And my hazy memory says there was another dish but I can't remember it right now. I'm going to hazard a guess and say it involved garlic and potatoes. I did get the big beer - a litre, which required both hands to get to my mouth. It was delicious, but I'm not sure if it was more delicious than the Bavarian beer. I may need to put some more time into researching this.
After the typical Czech feast in the typical Czech pub, we had about half an hour to walk through the main part of Liberec before getting to the bus stop to ship me back to Prague. We wandered through the square, I saw some authentic gypsies (Roma ones, not the ones that get married on TV in Ireland), who didn't appear any different from other people I've seen sitting in town squares drinking. I made it back to the bus stop in time for my bus, said farewell and thanks to Veronika and made my way back to Prague for a blissful night of hotel sleep and BBC World.
I enjoyed my sleep deeply, and woke up to an included buffet breakfast. I was unnaturally excited about this and stocked up on pastries and mediocre coffee. In keeping with my laziness, I had decided to put myself onto one of those all inclusive day tours of the city. I just didn't feel like consulting my map/the internet of what there was/what I should do in Prague. So I found a tour through the hotel and had booked myself on it, got collected in the morning from the lobby and met the people I would be shepherded around Prague with for the day. And what an annoying group of people they were. Not bad people, just not people I like to spend time with. It was mostly just the group of 13 doctors from Chicago and India who were all a bit precious. They continuously asked the guide to slow her walking down to their dawdling pace and asked for the nearest bathroom every 5 minutes. They would hold out a handful of assorted currencies and ask her to find the Czech krones to pay for the toilets. The guide was visibly annoyed by them, dampening her mood which in turn, made the tour not that fun. We were on a mini bus through the Old Town, which was nice to be seated while we whizzed past lovely buildings unable to take them in. It didn't help that it was a bilingual tour - English & Spanish - and she didn't have time to explain everything in both languages. Still, we got to see a lot of the city, had a walk around the Prague Castle complex as well as an included lunch - despite a Jordanian woman's fussy refusal of the food. Let me explain. At the beginning of the tour, the guide asked who was a vegetarian. About 80% of the tour raised their hands (80% being the 13 doctors who were Hindus). There was a couple across from me debating with each other in a language I couldn't understand. Turns out they were debating whether or not to count themselves as vegetarians, when the only meat product they don't eat is pork. So they tried to explain this to the guide in their weak English to guide, whose English was a second, maybe even third, fourth or fifth language. After a 10 minute discussion, we established the planned lunch was a beef goulash, so they would be okay to not be counted as vegetarians. However, when we get to the restaurant, the guide learns that the chef has chosen to make something else - a macaroni bake. The Jordanian woman asks what's in it, and the guide doesn't know. The food comes out and she gets really annoyed, demanding everyone around to test their food and tell her what meat it is. There was a lot of cheese in the bake, so it was hard to detect definitely which animal was in it, but she keeps her serving of food in case it's not pork. At this point, wouldn't it just be easier to say you're a vegetarian? We eventually learn that it is pork, and this outrages the woman. The waiter offers to bring her a salad, which she refuses out of principal. She'd rather be angry and not eat to prove a point. Definitely the opposite of a Me. I will always eat no matter how much I want to prove something. A bit later a waiter brings out a delicious looking salad for her, and she takes it without saying thanks and eats it up. It's always awkward in these situations when you're sitting with someone who's being unreasonably rude, but you're not with them and you completely disagree with their actions and want to demonstrate your sympathy with the waiting staff, but you also have to stay at the table with that person and maintain some kind of civility. It was at this point that I turned to the German girl next to me who was with her Mexican in-laws, and was relieved to speak English rather than Spanish for a bit. Europe.
The tour took us across the Charles Bridge, which was a beautiful walkway decorated with statues and clogged with tourists. We then went on a boat ride around the river, before walking around a bit more. I made mental notes of the places to return to in my own time later. The tour ended and I went off on my own to revisit nice buildings. I took myself out for dinner to a restaurant advertising a gypsy band, and ordered myself half a litre of beer and half a duck, making a whole meal. The gypsies were crazy and I tried not to make eye contact with the violinist, who would play for anyone who glanced at him in return for money (and I only had so many Czech krones with me and wasn't planning on withdrawing any more). I got through my beer and maybe half of my half duck (which was a bit dry, to be honest) with dumplings before having an evening stroll, taking in Prague at night. I navigated my way through the metro system back to my hotel for a relaxing snooze before heading for Berlin in the morning. It was a very quick stint in the Czech Republic, but it was so nice to be welcomed by Veronika and fed so well. And it was also lovely to be in a hotel. Really lovely. Yeah, don't need to stay in hostels again for a long time.
German Face
My flight to Frankfurt boarded the quickest I've ever seen a plane be boarded. I'm going to like this German efficiency. Despite being slightly delayed (this shocked me), I got into Frankfurt airport okay and was collected by my friend Jasmin. Jasmin and I were housemates when I lived in Buenos Aires almost three years ago. As soon as I landed I received a call telling me to look out for a a white something (I don't know cars, so figured remembering the colours would be better) with a red roof. After said car with Jasmin picked me up, I was presented with my three options for the evening. I'd landed at about 10PM, so I wasn't expecting evening activities, but how can I say no? First of all, there was a beer festival on that Jasmin's boyfriend was at, but it was a bit far out, so we'd need to decide immediately if we would go. The second option was to meet some of her friends closer to home for a drink somewhere. The third was to go home and do nothing. My heart knew I wanted the last option, and I hadn't eaten for ages so food was what was really on my mind. I decided to beer festival option, although highly tempting, wasn't the go because I'd have felt too rushed, plus I was a bit stinky from Croatia. But not wanting to be boring, I said we should meet her friends after dumping my stuff at her apartment in Glauburg - about an hour or less from Frankfurt. But I did say if her friends weren't feeling it, I wouldn't be offended if they didn't want to go out. As luck would have it, Jasmin's friends were tired, so we stayed at home, ate cold meats and heavy breads while watching 'Knight Rider'. Perfect first night in Germany. After a well earned sleep in, Jasmin set out to show me the part of Germany she lives in. It's quite rural where she is, which I found refreshing after being surrounded by people all week in Croatia. It was nice to drive on country roads, even if everyone was doing over 200km/hr (I asked Jasmin the fastest she went while I was in the car, and she got up to 190 at one point). We drove past these two figures about 6m tall, made out of hay to look like a bride and groom. Jasmin told me they were made for a couple in the village that got married recently, and that it's a common practice. I couldn't decide if that was creepy or cute at first, but now I've decided it's just downright adorable. We first visited Rottenburg Castle, which was really cool. Jasmin hadn't been before, but apologised in case I found the castle boring. I had to keep telling her that the castle was built 500 years before any buildings were built in Australia, so that alone makes it interesting to me. It had a 90m well that you could throw water down, which was surprisingly entertaining. You could go into most of the rooms which had old furniture and some artefacts in cases. The signs were all in German though, so I had to get my trusty German to translate for me. We climbed up a lot of bell towers, my legs did not thank me for that. After the castle we returned home where Jasmin & Sven (her boyfriend) would be hosting a BBQ for me and two more of their friends. It was about 32 degrees, so not ideal for us to be sitting in direct sunlight, but it was good fun with lots of good wurst and Jasmin introduced me to the locally produced apple wine (apfelwein), which I loved. It tastes a bit like cider but with absolutely no sweetness. Or, it tastes like dry wine with a bit of apple in it. (I'm a real connoisseur). I didn't mind that most of the conversation over lunch was held in German, mostly because I was so exhausted from the bell tower climbing that talking would have taken up too much energy. Jasmin's friends were very interested in Australia, as one had recently watched a "documentation" on Aborigines. I fielded their questions, and gave them some nice places to visit if they ever make it Down Under. In the afternoon, Jasmin, Sven & I went to a nearby medieval village called Bundingen, where we would be given a tour by a local lady. This woman was so passionate about her town, which really made such a difference in the tour. She knew her stuff, pointing out houses where important people lived and what made them important. She walked us through the town (which was beautiful, by the way), describing its history (of which there is a lot). I think she sometimes forgot I wasn't a German speaker, as she'd say something to Jasmin or Sven and then continue on in German for a bit, look at me expectedly for a response, and all I could do was smile, and hope that wasn't weird in the context of what she'd said. One story I did like from the tour (I won't bore you with the rest, and also because I've mostly forgotten it all) was about a prince (maybe... could have been a duke or some other kind of nobility. Anyway, an important guy) who married a girl whom he loved very dearly. As the town is built on a swamp, there are a lot of frogs about. On their wedding night, the girl moves in to her fancy new digs with her new husband. The help are a bit nosey and listen outside their bedroom door, and can hear the girl crying and saying, "No, no, no! I can't do this!". They discover the next day it was because she was annoyed at the noise the frogs were making outside their bedroom in the swamp. She said if they didn't stop, she would move back in with her father. New husband doesn't want that to happen, so he goes into the town and asks the good townspeople to collect all the frogs (and I guess kill them? The guide didn't say that, but how else could they get rid of the noise?), which they do, and the girl and important man live happily ever after with minimal frog noise. That's love. So now each year there is a frog festival where kids dress up as frogs, and there are frog statues scattered about the town. Isn't that nice? The tour took us in some more towers (my poor legs) including the "Witch's Tower", where women who were accused of being witches were imprisoned. I was a bit scared of being in a tower of witch ghosts, but then decided that if the women trapped in there were really witches, they'd have magicked their way out of there, so the ghosts would just be regular human ghosts, which I decided was the lesser of two evils. After three hours of walking about town, our guide leaves us and we meet some more of Sven & Jasmin's friends at a beer garden built on the medieval town wall. It was that cool. We then got ice cream, and went home, with a little detour past a Celtic grave that was discovered just 10 years ago and is from... I want to say the 8th century? I might be wrong there. It's just really old, okay? Monday morning came around, and Jasmin had to go play her role in reality at her job in Frankfurt. As my train would be leaving Frankfurt later in the day, I got a lift into the city with her. I put my suitcase into left luggage, got a Starbucks, where the man wrote my name down as 'Birgit', bought a 50 cent map of the city and went for a walk. I took myself down on the river and into the centre of the city, and decided I'd done enough walking, and hopped onto a hop-on hop-off city tour bus. I learnt about how important a role Frankfurt plays in Europe's and also the global economy, and immediately realised that's not very interesting to me. There weren't that many old buildings about, but maybe that's reminiscent of the war, I'm not sure how badly Frankfurt was affected by that. After my bus tour I found a little fair type thing, which was adorable. I bought and ate a pretzel the size of my face, and refreshed myself with some apfelwein. I unintentionally had a conversation with the bartender in German. By that I mean I must've sounded like I said 'ein' instead of 'one' and pronounced 'apfelwein' correctly. He then picked up a glass and asked a question that sounded like it would have been, "This size okay?", so I said "ja". He showed me the drink and I said, "gut". My act all came unravelled when he told me the price, and I said, "Um.. is that 2.50 Euro?". "Yes, thank you," said the bartender. I returned to the train station, had some Haagen-Dasz, paid 1 Euro to use the toilet and got on my train to Munich. A man across the aisle from me said something in German as he grabbed the paper from my seat pocket that I wasn't reading. I said, "Ja" he said "Danke", I said "bitte". Maybe pretending to be German isn't that tricky when you have the face for it. I would've been a-okay in the 30s. I got off the train four hours later, and found my hostel on a dank street that made me feel like I could be re-enacting 'Taken' if I stuck around too much. And my dad isn't Liam Neeson, so I'd be stuck being a drug addled prostitute in Albania for the rest of my life, and I have other things to do! So I decided to not loiter on the streets around my hostel. I wasn't too psyched to see my top bunk was about 5 metres high. I didn't stick around long before going on a food hunt - the hostel had recommended a place about 15 minutes away that is known for their schnitzels. Did I want a schnitzel the size of my face? Yes I did. I got there, and was a bit happy to see the majority of the other diners were Germans. They may have been Germans from other areas of Germany, and so still tourists, but I'm not to know that. I ordered the pork schnitzel Vienna style and an Augustiner Radler beer, which was the most delicious beer I've tasted. It's such a cliche for people to love Bavarian bier, but this one was truly delicious. I don't know what made me pick it from the menu out of the other choices, but it was an excellent choice Birgit. The schnitzel was delicious and I managed to chow down most of it. It was a happy evening. After surviving a night sharing a ten bed dorm with a snorchestra (do they not have friends that tell them they snore? And if they do, why are they being so selfish as to sleep in a room with so many others?), I joined the free walking tour of the city. I only had one day for Munich, and would have loved to have done any of the day trips - you could go to Dachau, the first concentration camp; or there was the Neuschwanstein castle ('Disney Castle'), or you could even do a day trip to Salzburg. But, I was in Munich, so I should see Munich's main attractions. We were led by a Perth boy, who was in Munich because he met and fell in love with a Bavarian girl. Maybe so he could have somewhere to stay for Oktoberfest? He was a great guide, and knew a lot of history. We started off watching the glockenspiel in the main square do it's thing, he wasn't that enthralled by it and talked it down a lot, but I still kind of liked it. It's like a big cuckoo clock with a little scene that plays out twice or three times a day, to badly tuned bells (they were tuned in Amsterdam, so the locals blame the Dutch for being too high to be able to tune bells). We went to the Fraunkirche, a church that was all but destroyed by the Allies, who left the two towers at the front standing so they could be used as a landmark. The church had its own interesting stories, my favourite being how when the Nazi party was gathering momentum, they let the locals Jews keep their religious items in the basement of the church, and said they'd look after them until it was safe to practice Judaism again. The war ended, the religious items were returned, and to say thank you, the remaining Jewish community helped rebuild the church that had been gutted by fires and bombs. The church's ceiling has little crests and icons on parts of it, so to thank the Jews for helping them rebuild the church, the Catholics have included a picture of a manora (the candle holder used in Hannukah), not only to say thanks but to act as a reminder of what happened. I thought that was quite nice. The tour took us to loads of historical places, but we are in Europe. We went to the site of Hitler's beerhall putsch, which made me want to be able to say the word 'putsch' more often. Behind the Odeonplatz was an alleyway that had some gold bricks on the ground. This was an area where non-Hitler loving Germans would walk through so they wouldn't have to give the Nazi salute each time they walked down the street. However, the Nazis caught on eventually, and would beat up or kill the "dodgers" who went down this alleyway, just to avoid saluting Hitler. We were shown just the outside of the Hoftbrauhaus, the most famous beer hall (arguably) in the world. There was some kind of flower festival going on around here, with lots of locals in their Bavarian outfits with bunches of flowers, decorating some tractors that were parked in the square for some reason. Eh, it's summer. The tour ended at some markets, where I decided to refuel with food. I went into a food eatery place, saw a bain-marie of food, featuring some particularly crackly looking pork. I ask the lady for the pork. She says uncertainly, "It's pork knuckle?" in a way that suggested she thought I thought it was just regular pork and might be put off by eating the knuckle of a piggy. I said that was okay. She asked me if I wanted potatoes or cabbage. I said both. She said 10 Euros. I said okay. It was pretty delicious - the crackling bit anyway, and the fat. The rest of the meat was a bit dry, but I guess I was eating bain-marie pork knuckle. After eating pork in 34 degree heat, I decided that was a good time to walk up the bell tower of St. Peter's to get a good view of Munich. That was silly. The staircase was very narrow most of the way, which was only annoying for the two-way traffic thing. I guess not many people were jumping off the tower that day. I made it up to the top, sweaty and with a bit of vertigo, as the railing wasn't blocking much from my height-sensitive eyes, and the balcony was a bit rocky at best. I stayed long enough to get some nice photos of the city and some landmarks, before gradually making my way down. I got used to stopping at a landing to let people going the other direction get by, them giving me a "danke" and me throwing a "bitte" their way. They all thought I was one of them, brilliant. I was coming down the stairs and saw a hefty young boy panting at the bottom of the stairs. I gestured for him to come up, but he gestured for me to come down. He said something to me in German which I think was, "I just had loads of pork and wurst in my life and going up these stairs is tricky and it's so hot and I need a break!", so I laughed back in a way that was meant to mean, "Yes it is a very hot day, and there are a lot of stairs, you take your time young man", and then said "Danke" and he threw me a "bitte". You don't need only words to communicate. I carried on walking, dying a little of heat exhaustion and regretting not putting sunscreen on my face. I was also wondering where all the convenience stores were. I just wanted to buy a big bottle of water, but could only see souvenir stores and restaurants. So thirsty! I walked to the English Gardens and found a cool place to sit down where I could watch the fake waves they'd created in the river for people to surf on. I was incredibly jealous of the people by the river who had brought swimmers and friends to mind their things while they cooled off in the river. I left after a little while, more exhausted and thirsty and decided the reason for the lack of convenience stores was because Germans don't need them. They're so organised and efficient that at the beginning of every day, they pack everything they could possibly need for the duration of their outing. My German blood is diluted, so I'm not that organised, and tend to buy bottles of water while I'm out. It's my thing. I eventually found a take away shop with water, bought one for an outrageous 2.10 Euros, and stumbled back to the hostel to recover from my big dehydrated sunstroked day. I wanted to return to the Hoftbrauhaus to get a stein, but I was a little bit sunstrokey, so didn't make it back out of the hostel (plus I didn't want to get kidnapped in my weakened state). After listening to people say silly things in the common area (An American asked, "Is the water here portable?". I'm sure it is portable if you have it in a vessel you can carry.", I turned in for what I would have liked to have been an early night in my bed 5m in the sky, but my dorm mates would not have that. Some very drunk American girls came in to go to bed, one suggesting to her drunker friend to go brush her teeth to which she responded, "I am not brushing my teeth, no one is making me do that, not even Jesus.". After the drunk girls passed out and started snoring, I had difficulty getting to sleep. Just as I was about to get to sleep, a group of Brazilian boys came in talking loudly in Portuguese, stinking up the room with their beer breath. I decided then that I would try my best to make the most noise when I would be leaving the following morning at 5.30AM. Sadly, my politeness overcame me, and I was pretty quiet in my exit. I dragged my suitcase to the bus stop, and found a place to sit near the platform my bus to Prague would be leaving from. A man sat next to me said something in German, so I said, "I'm sorry, I don't speak German." and he simply nodded. But that wasn't to be the end of the exchange. His English was very poor, but with the use of pointing, I managed to work out that either he was from Prague, or his name was Prague. Either way, he wrote something down on a piece of paper for me and said, "Prague. Google." and showed me the piece of paper. I decided it was his recommendations for things for me to see. He then pointed at my face, then at his jawline and said, "German. German." with a hard 'g'. I think he was trying to tell me I had a German face, or maybe the Czech word for jawline is 'german' with a hard g. I don't know. The only full sentence he said in English was, "I'm sorry I don't speak English." I said I was sorry I didn't speak German, which for some reason prompted him to ask me, "Parle Italiano?". After he realised the communication was too difficult, he let me be. The bus arrived, I boarded with about 4 other passengers, we left at exactly 7.00AM. The bus trip was a cruisy 5 hours that I wrote the bulk of this entry in, the crossover into the Czech Republic was a complete non-event. I arrived at the bus station in Prague that looked like it was a warzone just last week. I asked the tourist desk where the taxis were, she explained. I found 5 taxis with no drivers in them. Maybe I should have specified that I wanted one with a driver. One turned up eventually and took me to my HOTEL (please note the lack of 's' in the middle of that word), where I am currently. The bed is big and comfy and I can leave my shit about everywhere. Yay! So if you'll excuse me, I have a few things to go and 'Czech' out...
"To Die In Dalmatia...."
Katie and I left the hostel on Saturday morning in search of our floating home for the week - a sailing boat named Ribic (pronounced Rib-itch). We found Ribic parked 5 boats from the dock, so lugged our bodies and suitcases (mind, Katie had only come for the week so packed light. But Bitches and her giant suitcase had all the fun jumping across boats, hoping not to fall into the gap between the boats into the water where we had seen a turd floating earlier. We were the first of the passengers to arrive, and met our lovely Kiwi rep (or tour leader) for the week, Emily. Slowly the other 15 passengers arrived, and I was right in telling Katie she would be the exotic foreigner on the boat, being the only non-Australian asides from Emily and the boat crew. We also learnt that we were just a bit older than the rest of the passengers, with one group of 6 boys from Melbourne being 18-20 years old, two Perth girls of 20, two Adelaide boys of 20. There were two couples as well - one from Perth who were my age, and another who was one from Perth and the other from Mauritius (so okay, not Australian, but that couple kept to themselves mostly so they weren't really on my radar). Just as I was preparing Katie in her role as exotic foreigner, a young girl rushed on the boat, speaking quickly in an English accent trying to find out why her name wasn't on the list of passengers when she had a booking reference print-out in her hand. It was all sorted out, and Babs (the only person in their 20s I've met to have chosen 'Babs' as their nickname) - who is actually half-Polish, half-Belgian but grew up in England - became the last passenger of the ship. I first want to tell you about our ship crew, because they were truly wonderful people. First our captain - Stipe (pronounced Stee-pay), a 50 year old bachelor, with intensely blue eyes. His friend was our bartender, Mile (pronounced Mee-lay), a 32 year old with the cheekiest laugh that is impossible not to mimic. Stipe's helper was sailor Marko, only 23 and studying maritime.. stuff.. Who cares, he had an amazing body and didn't wear a shirt often, that's what really matters here. Marko is also really passionate about Dalmatia, and won't hear any word of another place being as or more beautiful than it. One morning he was on the deck with Emily, gestured to the scenery and said, "To die in Dalmatia.... I don't have the words....", which we have taken to mean that there would be no greater honour than to have lived and died in Dalmatia. And last of all, chef Gordan, of 26 years of age. Gordan's English was the strongest out of the crew, and his food was wonderful. We got fed breakfast and lunch on the boat each day, with lunch being a proper 3-course meal, of which Gordan put his heart and soul into. Gordan was also the only crew member to not be a Dalmatian, but rather, he grew up in Zagreb. I asked if he had any memories of the war, even though he was really young when it happened, and his memories are extremely vivid. I didn't want to ask anything further than that. He has also been offered a job in a cafe in Melbourne, so if he follows through on that, I may have to make the trip to visit that wonderful man. The trip itself ran for a week, and we pulled into a different port each night, and slept on the boats. Our first night was spent in Milna, where we visited a little old lady that runs a winery that has been in her family for over 300 years. We tasted her goods, which were pretty good. Although, I think the experience may have been lost on the majority of the passengers on the boat, who seemed disappointed in the amount of alcohol they got to drink. The two Perth girls seemed mostly upset by the lack of vodka & juice at the winery. We had a cruisy first evening, had some pizza and an early night on the boat. Our neighbouring boat had apparently nicknamed us the "grandma boat" for this reason, which really upset the young boys and Perth girls. I was a bit proud. That first night sleeping on the boat, Katie and I made the terrible mistake of trying to sleep with the door closed, which eventuated in me have a menopausal tantrum, jumping down from my bunk and running outside for oxygen. I then slept on the floor, completely unbeknownst to Katie who was clearly not having the same middle age woman problems I was having 30 years too early. During our days, we usually set off from the dock in the morning, so it was always delightful to wake up to the Dalmatian scenery floating by. The waters were so clear towards the shorelines, and a gorgeous blue colour where it was deeper, and the islands were quite mountainous. No description I write could do it justice, so you'll either have to see it yourself or take Marko's "to die in Dalmatia" proclamation as a truthful honour. We'd get ourselves out of bed to get some breakfast before it finished at 10, with not many others joining us for breakfast and scenery-watching. Breakfast would often be followed by a swim stop, where Stipe would stop the boat close to an island, Marko would swim and tie a rope to a rock (this was our favourite bit to watch) and we could swim around the boat for an hour or more, until it was lunch time when Gordan would feed us delicious things. I got really used to that lifestyle, and am not sure I can go on living life any other way. Our second evening was spent in Hvar, which I had only heard of from the itinerary, but the cool young people on the boat had heard of it for the "sick nightlife". Is it possible to have a generation gap with someone 5 years younger than you? We had a big group dinner and a steak restaurant, and joined up with another tour group from the same company. They were also an infestation of Australians, but the worst kind. There was a couple from Sydney, and the girl was already performing a pole dance around an umbrella before we'd even sat down at the restaurant. I was lucky enough to sit opposite her at dinner, which was a bit good because I could watch her spill her wine on herself every time she tried to drink some, as well as watch her abuse her boyfriend (only verbally). She also started to get really verbal about immigration rights, so it was hard not to punch her in the face a lot of the time. It's people like that that make me embarrassed to tell people overseas where I'm from, in case they've had to see that kind of behaviour. I'll rant about that later, though, so if you don't care, just skip that bit. After the dinner, we went to a few bars, and were told about an island nearby that had a club on it. The entrance alone was about 30 Euros, and I wasn't too keen on going on a water taxi, or being on and island of people like that girl, so I gave it a miss. Katie followed suit, and we hung out on the top of the boat, trying to spot shooting stars, because we are old. The next morning we asked everyone how the island club was, and they all hated it, so no big loss. Mljet was the next place we'd go, which had a national park consisting of stunning salt lakes. Katie and I rode a tandem bike there, which is something I've always wanted to do, and it wasn't as difficult as I thought it might be. Communication is the key to tandem cycling. Although we did get good enough to not even need to use words. We were that in sync. We had the captain's dinner that evening, which was an optional three course meal cooked by Gordan on the boat. I ate so much that I needed a nap afterwards and ended up sleeping the whole night. Nobody parties harder than I. Dubrovnik was next, and that is an amazing city. We watched people jump off a cliff into the ocean (from the safety of a cliff-side bar) first, and then went exploring. The old city's walls are still completely intact, so after looking around the town and at a museum, Katie and I walked along the walls looking out to the ocean on some parts and into the city in others. There were a few ticket check points, and I told off some young Australian girls for cutting the queue, waving their tickets in the man's face yelling "hello! Hello!". Some people are just knobs. There was a protest going on in the city, and you'd have to ask Babs exactly what it was about. We lost her for a few hours as she found someone in the protest to talk to, and became really impassioned about their cause. I think they were protesting against a rich guy buying up a lot of the land near the old town in the mountains, as the townspeople will be paying the taxes that pay for the water etc. on that land. I think. Ask Babs. We had more drinks in Dubrovnik, and ended up at a club that was in part of the old city walls. Korcula - birthplace of Marco Polo - was the stop for the next day, which was a beautiful little town. Katie & I overheard one of the boys behind us say as we were walking through it, "We're too young to appreciate this," which I think was their way of appreciating it, without being vulnerable to their mates thinking them odd. Bless. We went to a bar that was at the top of an old watch tower, so the drinks get brought up to you via a pulley system. Great novelty value. Then we had pizzas on the beach, before the evening activity of foam party. I'd rather have ripped my eyeballs out than go to a foam party with hundreds of young Australians, so I stayed on the boat. Katie accompanied Emily to the party, minded people's bags while they got foamed up and played the role of mother. Again, we are old. I just couldn't think of anything worse than being hungover on a boat, so did well in avoiding that. And I also liked being up in the mornings to enjoy the scenery. Yeah, old. Our last stop was Makarska, which felt the most like a beachy holiday spot than the others. We did a bit of shopping, and prepared ourselves for the sailors & pirates night that all the other tours would be partaking in. Emily took us all to a bar that's been built in a cave by a beach, which was amazing until a thousand Australians in stripey shirts showed up. Katie, Emily & I left the hoards of whores and went to a quiet bar for a few drinks, and were joined by Captain Stipe and his sister. Much better. We had one last night in Split to end the week, and just spent it hanging around the city and then having some drinks in the evening. Emily was lovely, and the crew were all fantastic people, as I've said. They just all joke around with each other, and you can see they're having fun, so you have fun. We never wanted to leave the boat, so Katie decided in order to stay on Ribic, she would marry Stipe. She proposed to him on the Makarska evening, and he said yes without any hesitation whatsoever. However, I secretly think he's married to the sea. Croatia is a stunning place, and it saddens me that so many knob heads travel there. I really think there should be a test to enter a country, so you have to have a basic knowledge of some history and culture of a place before you enter. I'm not saying I know loads about Croatia, but if I knew I had to pass a general knowledge test about it before going there, I would learn. Most of the Aussies we saw in Croatia were incredibly rude and loud, running around these beautiful little towns being obnoxious dickheads. It kind of dampens the experience a bit, so I can't imagine how Croatians feel about it if they're having a holiday in their own country to see knobs like that out and about. And it's not only the laddish behaviour that annoys me, but the fact that they feel okay with writing themselves off every night with no consideration of consequences - whether that be getting themselves into trouble somehow, or offending someone else somehow. And why would you travel all this way to do that when you can get wasted at home? It's really embarrassing to see. I overheard some Aussies chatting in a hostel, "I tried bartering at the market and the lady got really upset about it" "Why mate? They should be grateful!" "Yeah I know aye, it's heaps shit, not like Thailand." I almost hit them, but opted to scoff, and pretended like it was a cough so as to not draw attention to myself or make them think I was listening, because my mum raised me to be polite and respectful. So, asides from being overrun with Australians, Croatia was amazing, and so impressive considering how recently it was a war zone and how recently it formed into the country it is today. I don't know much about the Yugoslavian war, but going to Croatia has made me want to look into it more. I did not meet one unfriendly Croatian, and not only were they friendly, but they were funny, helpful and happy. Just a beautiful group of people, living in a beautiful country. I would like to visit again, and if possible, sail on Ribic again. That would be ideal. We got off Ribic the Saturday morning and said our sad goodbyes to the crew and Emily. Katie and I hung out for most of the day, until I had to leave for the airport. So then another goodbye for Katie. Travelling really is full of goodbyes. I arrived to Split airport much too early, and it is not a good airport to be early for. Given it's summer, there are loads more flights than usual going, so it was packed to over capacity in this tiny airport, that I bet is a Slavic wasteland in the winter time with many spare seats. I looked at the duty free shop about 8 times and used up the remainder of my kuna (Croatian currency), having to buy Coke because it was cheaper than water, and I couldn't afford water. My flight to Frankfurt was delayed, which shocked me because it was with Lufthansa, and I presumed a German airline would never be late. Silly Bitches. Now I'm in Germany, and these tales from here will be another blog! The week in Croatia was a nice little holiday within my holiday. It's the only time I had the same bed for a week (even if its location changed every night), and I got in some great relax time, plus built up a tan that will probably fade by the time I return to Australia. I got really used to sailing each day and swimming in the sea, even if I did have really bad sea legs when I got to land. Vala ('thank you' in Croatian) Dalmatia for your beautiful scenery and people.
Split, the difference
I got off my train in Ancona, Italy and foolishly decided I could walk to the ferry port. It wasn't that far, in terms of metres, but it was a lot of uphill, in 30 degrees, and a lot of it was on a pathway next to a motorway that would have barely fit an Olsen twin, let alone a normal sized person with a large suitcase. Plus the pedestrian path had been used as a dumping ground for everything, and I had to kick a crusty pair of jeans away at one point before narrowly avoiding a smashed sherry jug. At this point I hurled the suitcase over the barricade and braved to share the road with Italian drivers instead. Spoiler alert: everything turned out okay. I didn't know what to expect from the ferry. My cynical traveller had prepared for a shanty boat crammed with hundreds of others (the Australian government & media has given me ideas of what people on boats look like), but it was a lot nicer than that. It was a cruise ship, nothing fancy, but it had a few restaurants, a bar and a shop. I was in a cabin with a bunk bed, sharing with an older Italian lady whose only English sentence was, "Where do you come from?", but I didn't see much of her. The ship set sail at 8.30PM, and I spent a few hours sitting on the deck reading until it got dark, went to a restaurant and then watched the cruise ship entertainment - a singer and keyboardist duo doing terrible covers. I've heard better at pub karaoke. If all it takes to become a cruise ship entertainer is to have minimal talent, I think I've found my new career. I slept alright in the bunk bed, but I was mostly impressed with the shower, which was better than all the showers I've had on the trip so far. It had both pressure, and consistent heat. Luxury. The next morning we pulled into Split, and I hadn't noticed the night before, but so many people had brought dogs on board. All different kinds, and mostly well behaved ones, except for one little daschund owned by a peroxide blonde, botoxed, over-tanned woman who could have been anywhere between 40 and 80 in years, and had clearly not bothered to get her dog socialised, as it had a serious case of little dog syndrome and tried to pick fights with all the other dogs. So money doesn't buy dog obedience classes, then, I guess. We got off the ship, threw passport control and then first person I came across officially in Croatia was a man in his 50s, wearing board shorts and wicker hat and he said to me, "Hey girl, you need apartment?". People here are really friendly. I tried to follow my hostel's directions but again failed. I'm staying in the Old Town, which is located entirely within the walls of Diocletian's Palace (it's from Roman times), so there are no cars, just narrow winding streets, and not in a grid system. I found the hostel eventually in time for their reception's opening, so was helping up the stairs by the lovely receptionist. As I was way too early to check-in, she let me leave my stuff there and offered me to use the shower (maybe it was a hint, but I took it to be a kindness thing), let me chill out in the common room and gave me a map and some guidance on things to do in Split. It's these kinds of things that make the difference in small hostels and the chain ones. I wandered around Old Town Split, getting lost in all the little streets, enjoying what I was seeing. My favourite stall was a man selling shoelaces. All different colours and sizes. Now I'm no afficionado, as I don't wear laced shoes often, but how frequently do shoes need new laces? In all my years of school wearing shoes with laces, I only recall them needing replacement once or twice, and that was because I'd destroyed them out of boredom in a school assembly. I returned to the hostel to check in, and quickly discovered the Australian infestation in Croatia I've heard so much about. I met some friendly girls from Sydney's north shore, and they invited me to share a drink with them in the common room. Although they weren't people I'd probably be friends with at home (one was wearing the denim shorts that show off your butt cleavage - another epidemic in Europe - and tried to tell me the Spanish word for supermarket was 'supermeerkat' as she saw it written on a store. I thought about explaining that that was probably just the chain name, but I let her live in her false belief. She's only 20, she'll figure it out sometime), it was good to have some company. Plus I didn't feel like doing much that afternoon, so drinking beer was a good activity. People came and went in the common room, and I met a New Yorker who lives in San Francisco teaching history, and was just on a government paid trip through parts of Europe. Yeah, the government pays for them to go to historical parts of Europe to help them teach history to the children. If we did that, I'd be doing a DipEd in a heartbeat. Or is it something you could claim back on tax if you had a clever accountant? Everyone was going to get pizza that night, but as I was out of Italy, I felt like something else, so took myself on another date. I didn't venture far. The place's menu had everything listed in Croatian, English, German and Italian. Except one dish which was the same in all four - Cevapcici (which has a lot of accents over letters that my keyboard doesn't accommodate). I asked the waiter what it was and he said, "It is different types of meat rolled together to look like fingers". I do like a good mystery meat meal, so told him I'd have it, he said, "You want to try traditional Croatian dish! It is our speciality!" and ran back to the kitchen, presumedly to excitedly tell the chef that a foreigner finally ordered the dish they hadn't figured out how to translate into 3 other languages. The waiters in Split all have their repertoire of asking diners where they're from, and knowing a fact or two about the place. I overheard him talk to two other Aussie tables, "It is winter there now, yes? What does that mean, winter in Australia?", and everyone had a different answer for which part they were from. Back to the food - I would say the different meats looked more like turds, but they were delicious. Very salty (which I like), but also garlicky and maybe some paprika or something like that in them too. I ate it all up and the waiter came back, "So it is good recommendation, yes?". Yes waiter, you did good, and winter in Sydney is about 15-18 degrees during the day, so not that bad compared to lots of Europe. After dinner I walked to the main square and saw that something was about to happen. Split's summer festival is on at the moment, and as this is Europe, summer festivals involve things like ballet. So they had set up a stage outside some of the columns that make up Diocletian's Palace, complete with an orchestra pit. There was a seated area, but there were also people standing behind the area, so I made myself part of that group and ended up having a pretty excellent (and free) view of ballerinas dancing to Verdi in beautiful costumes, with a live orchestra playing. There was a girl of about 10 or 11 years old just behind me trying to get a look, so I let her get ahead of me, and she was super excited to see the ballerinas dance. I haven't seen a kid that happy unless they were a fat one and just getting their McDonald's. If that's not a million karma points, I don't know what is. I stuck it out standing to watch the free ballet for about an hour before heading back to the hostel. I hung out in the common room again as there were some Aussie girls (turned out they were from Cronulla) listening to ear-offending music in the dorm room while they pre-gamed. Most everyone was heading out, but I declined. A few years ago, I always hated the people in hostels who would say, "I'm too old to keep that up" (being only 25, like myself), because I knew they weren't actually that old, and it always sounds really patronising to tell someone 3-5 years younger than you that you are so much older than them. But I feel it, I feel old. Anyway, there was someone else having a quiet night in the dorm, so I wasn't the only nana. I had a terrible night's sleep though, as the air conditioning was set to "Arctic", the bed was springy, and I only had a sheet to protect me from the Arctic blasts. There was also no remote for the air-con to be found. It was awful. I layered up with a jumper and an extra pair of long pants over my pyjamas, and even used my towel as an extra blanket. Not fun. I wasn't surprised to wake up early the next morning, and made a break for the warmth of the not-dorm room. Today I took myself off to a beach, and had a lovely morning. It, like a lot of beaches in Europe, was made of pebbles instead of sand. I'm getting used to it, but still prefer sand. I now understand why those ugly aqua shoes exist, though. Getting in and out of the water on pebble beaches is no easy or attractive feat. I looked around at the beach and saw lots of leathery looking people. It makes me wonder why Australia has a higher rate of skin cancer than Europe, as I haven't seen this many leather people at home. I guess leather doesn't equal cancer. I had a lovely morning at the beach, alternating between lying in the sun until I got unbearably hot, then went for a paddle in the sea, rinse and repeat. A truly tough life. An equally difficult afternoon, I went for another meal, this time enjoying "stuffed chicken", which was just two bits of grilled chicken with some ham and cheese sandwiched in the middle. Basically, it was a fancy KFC Double Down. But it was served with zucchini and eggplant. I went to the basements of Diocletian's Palace afterwards to get some history stuff in, but didn't strain myself too hard trying to remember things. Not much else happened this afternoon, except a kiwi fruit flavoured ice cream. Action packed! I am now awaiting the arrival of Katie from Oxford. After the trouble I had finding the place, I'm going to meet her somewhere so she doesn't have to blindly navigate the maze that is Split Old Town. And tomorrow morning we start on our 8-day sailing adventure of the Dalmatian coast! (That's what I forgot to tell you, when I got off the ferry arriving into Split, I saw a person walk by with a Dalmatian. I just thought that was nice.) So if you're a friend on facebook of mine, you can expect some jealousy-inducing photos in the near future. If you're not a Facebook friend, why are you reading this? How did you get here? I can sign photos if you like.
Ciao Italy ('goodbye' ciao, that is, not 'hello' ciao)
Venice looked like it was off to a promising start. The SleazyJet plane began its descent with a full moon leaving its reflection over the waters. I got off the plane quickly as I'd scored a second row seat. My bag was one of the first on the carousel. I walked out and got a ticket for a shuttle bus to town. I got on the bus and it left straight away. All good signs. Then I had to get to my hostel. The hostel had provided "directions", but they were near impossible to follow, especially as Venice only likes to label their streets, bridges, canals sometimes. It was also about 10.30PM, and my hostel had made its midnight lock-out policy very clear, so I was already panicked in my Kramerness about finding the hostel well before then. The other thing about Venice is that it doesn't have roads, so taxi isn't an option. The paths are narrow and the bridges aren't ramped, they are stairs. So lugging 20kgs of crap up and down the bridges almost broke me. And I went over the same bridges over and over in my getting lost. I'd ask waiters for directions and would get conflicting information. I avoided the men selling those glow in the dark things they fling in the air who were so keen to offer help, as I figured they'd demand money for being nice. After what felt like hours of aimless wandering, I decided to try a water taxi. I find one, but he's just picked up a family. He asks me where I need to go, he says he will take the family then come back and take me to my hostel for a cool 50 Euros. I knew I was getting desperate when I considered paying that. In the meantime, another water taxi pulled up, so I thought I'd see if he'd offer any less. I told him where my hostel was, and he told me to walk. I was so exhausted, sore, hot, fed up with it all that I couldn't help but cry as I walked away. I sat on a bench and saw my temper tantrum through, at one point being approached by another of the glow in the dark toy thing guys who asked if I needed help and I told him to go away. I was a 5 year old who lost their parents in a shopping centre. Eventually the tantrum passed, and I set off again, and did manage to find the hostel eventually. So it was a rocky start to Venice, and it didn't manage to redeem itself much. Don't get me wrong, it is a beautiful town, but I think I chose the wrong time to be there. It is a town just full of tourists, and probably no more than the other places I've been, but when you factor in how small Venice is and how narrow the streets are, it's not much fun sharing it with thousands of others. It's tourist walking that I can't stand. You can still see sights and fun things without shuffling. And it's not just the slowness that they do, but the wafty aimless walking. There is nothing more painful than a group of people walking at snail's pace, managing to take up the whole pathway so you have no way of getting around them at your normal pace. Or even worse when just one person manages to take up the whole space. I could rant for ages about the types of walkers that grate me, but maybe that deserves its own blog that no one ever has to read. I did love how Venice looked, there's no denying that the narrow streets and the bridges and canals are beautiful. There are lots of cute little shops selling different pastries and I found this great second-hand bookshop when I got lost at one point. It was just a big mess, but an organised mess. He'd stacked books in old boats, there were fat cats sleeping on piles of maps, and he'd even built a staircase out of books at the back of the store that he encouraged people to go up to get a nice view of the canal behind his store. I also had some good food in Venice, albeit a lot more expensive than Rome. I mostly stuck to different pastas, because I don't know if I can ever get sick of pastas, and enjoyed a few Camparis as well. When I was walking around town there was a man who looked like he was dressed as Mozart handing out flyers, so I took one and learnt that there would be a performance of Vivaldi's 'Four Seasons' that night. The price was a lot lower than home prices for that kind of thing, so I grabbed the opportunity to be classy. The seat allocation was a first come first serve basis, so my Kramerness paid off and I nabbed a front row seat. Despite being advertised as being air-conditioned, the venue was extremely hot and the poor solo violinist - who looked quite young - was sweating his little European face off. It was a great performance, and I'm glad I went along. I like that I didn't like Venice that much. I've been liking all the places I've been so far, pretty much, so I was worried I'd lost my ability to not like things. Now I know I can not like things, and I like that. You can't go about liking everything, otherwise the things you like won't seem that special, because you like everything anyway. I had planned to fly down to Ancona to get my overnight ferry to Split, Croatia. However, the flight times would involve me getting up at 4AM and rushing around Venice trying to get to the airport at that time was not a thrilling idea to me. So I forfeited my flights, and booked onto a couple of cheap trains that were leaving much later. It also saved me from hanging around Ancona all day with my heavy suitcase for company. I wouldn't say I was apprehensive about the trains due to hearing about terrible train accidents happening in countries I've just been to, but I wasn't thrilled about it. Still, the trains didn't derail and got me to Ancona in the end, my last port of Italy. Despite not loving Venice, I was enamoured by Rome and am dying to go to other parts of Italy. I know I say this about almost every place, but I will definitely be returning to Italy. Next time I'll take my time, maybe even drive around, and eat even more of everything. The next country is Croatia, starting and ending in Split on the Dalmatian Coast. I'll reunite (again) with Katie from Oxford for an 8-day sailing trip which I'm pretty sure will be just us and all of Australia. At least Katie will get the very rare experience an English person gets - that of being different.
Roman About
I don't know if I did it exactly as the Romans would do it, but I loved my time in Rome. From the second my shuttle bus from the airport did a loop around the Colosseum, I was sold. This would be a fun place. I got in on a Friday afternoon, found my hostel by doing the opposite of what their directions told me, and went out exploring. One of the first things I came across was a beautiful scene... A group of backpackers were standing outside another hostel, with their backpacks and suitcases and bodies blocking the walkway. Just ahead of me was a heavily botoxed Italian woman. She starts to yell at the crowd, in Italian. I've heard yelling in lots of different languages, but Italian yelling has to be my favourite. It's entertaining (if not directed at you). One of the backpackers says to her, "In English! In English!" (he didn't sound like a native English speaker), and this is when she flew off the handle, hand gestures in everyone's faces. "NO! IN ITALIA, ITALIANO! RESPECTO! RESPECTO!" I blended myself into the crowd in a way that I looked like I was a part of it, but far enough away to not bear the brunt of her shouting. She started moving people's suitcases about. One of the backpackers gave me a "What are you doing here?" look, so I awkwardly shuffled off, happy for what I saw but sad that it was over. I noticed on my map that I was not far from the Trevi Fountain, so decided to pop down there for a look. I got a bit lost along the way, but when I turned a corner and saw a group of a few hundred people facing the wall I'd just come around, I figured I'd found it. Have to say, I was impressed. I've seen the mock version of it in Vegas, and assumed that one was to scale, but this one was a lot larger. Or maybe it just felt that way because the square was quite small, comparatively. I weaved in through the tourists to get my own selfie, trying not to ruin others'. Afterwards I went back in the direction of the hostel, then out for a romantic dinner for one, where I enjoyed free bruschetta, spaghetti carbonara, friendly waiters and a man playing classic Italian tunes on an accordion. Yeah, Rome is alright. On the Saturday I had booked myself onto a tour of the Vatican, but it wasn't until the afternoon, so spent my morning, map in hand, gradually making my way towards it in time for the tour. I started off at the Spanish steps, realised I had no idea why they were significant but comforted myself that the other hundreds of people there probably didn't know either. My walk took me past a lot of old and significant looking buildings, and a castle. I stopped for a ham pizza before the tour, and then wandered to the tour office. This was where I met Deirdre - the only Irish person in the world who doesn't drink alcohol, and Natalia from Rio de Janeiro. I was relieved to find I wasn't the only one who had trouble "dressing for the Pope" that morning. Essentially, your shoulders and your knees must be covered, for the Pope does not want to see any of that. He just doesn't like joints, your lucky he allows elbows. Dressing for the Pope is pretty tricky when it's more than 30 degrees and humid as hell, and Natalia became known for her "whore shoulders" being on display (she had a cardigan to cover them up, don't worry, no religious figures were offended that day by anyone I know). Our tour guide was a short Italian woman who was in a big rush for some reason. We zipped through all the exhibitions, which is tricky when for the majority of the museums and churches in Vatican City, you're sharing the space with thousands of other people. She was not shy in displaying her contempt for the security guards at the Sistine Chapel, saying they just play on their phones, sit on their arses, throw their weight around all day. She got into a big argument with one that cordoned off an area we were about to walk through, so we would have to go a different way that would take longer. I don't speak Italian, but I'm pretty sure at the end of it, he called her a bitch. Again, Italian yelling is amazing. We eventually got into the Sistine Chapel after being led through a maze of walls adorned with gifts for previous Popes, and rooms with modern art (which the guide also hated. "What is this stuff, anyway?" she would say, "Oh that one is Dali, that's ok, but that? Who needs that here? They have special museums for that!"). Being a chapel, it wasn't that large, but it was crowded with people looking up, wishing they were allowed to photograph the ceiling. Except for us, who were quickly shepherded through the place, she showed us 'The Creation' momentarily and led us out of the chapel. Maybe she's agoraphobic, but if that's the case, she probably shouldn't be running tours of the Vatican. The tour ended at St. Peter's Basilica, where she left us to our own devices. I don't think I got anything more from going with a tour rather than just going on my own, because we still had to wait for her to go and get our tickets, which we could have easily done ourselves. Buy a book if you want to know about all the art and history, and you're set. Although I didn't get nothing out of the tour, because I now had Deirdre and Natalia as my Rome buddies, as it turned out we were all at the same hostel, and all solo travellers. So we were all grateful to have someone to take photos for us, so we no longer had to rely on selfies. Very big deal. After our tour we walked into St. Peter's Basilica, and it is impressive. I found it more impressive than the Sistine Chapel, but maybe just because I had time to take this in. After a quick scour of the gift shops, we decided to get some food and found a place near a piazza nearby. I had some more pasta and accompanied it with delicious limoncello. Natalia had a not so enjoyable meal, finding something green that she thought was mould in a bit of meat. She told the waiter, who tried to tell her that was meant to be there, but couldn't think of the English word for the ingredient, but it was a typical Roman dish. She said it tasted awful and he looked terrifically offended. I just felt uncomfortable. Afterwards we returned to the hostel for a rest before meeting again for the pub crawl hosted by the hostel, which I hadn't planned on attending, but was talked into it by the non-drinking Irish girl. When in Rome? It was a pretty standard hostel pub crawl - drinking games at the hostel bar, a terrifying bus ride to the first pub (we were all crammed onto one of the public buses, nobody paid for it, and everyone falling over/into each other as the bus flew over cobblestones), a free "shot" (it was vodka with juice. You can't call that a shot, it's just a tiny drink) at that pub, before being led to a "club" where we were the only ones there except for some predatory looking Italian men. And a guard continuously telling everyone to watch their bags. Still, it was a fun night, and there was a great group of people out. There were a group of Brazilians there from Florianapolis, and they were all surprised to learn that an Australian had been to that town. There was a group of Argentinians with not fantastic English, so I had fun reviving the Spanish again there. A couple from L.A. that were both wonderfully drunk but in a happy way. And then the couple that met 3 years ago on one of these hostel run pub crawls - a Canadian girl and Brazilian guy. They live in Canada now, but she has learnt Portuguese so she can speak with his family. They recently got married, and Rome was a stop on their honeymoon. Bless. Sunday was destined for more sight-seeing, so Deirdre, Natalia and I met in the morning, got some breakfast and set out. We first went to buy our tickets for the Colosseum, so when we did eventually get there, we wouldn't have to wait in the long queue. Genius. So we did that, and also visited the Pantheon, and I returned to the Trevi Fountain with them, which was good so I could redo my photo there, and also to throw a coin in, for tradition's sake. Deirdre wasn't feeling well, so we regrouped in a location she would feel comfortable in - an Irish pub. It was also nice to get in some air-conditioning. I realised that I probably wouldn't have time to get to the Colosseum before my evening activity, Deirdre just wanted to get back to the hostel, but Natalia needed to get there soon as it was her final day in Rome. As there is a metro stop at the Colosseum, we started to head towards there. I looked up and noticed the dark clouds in the sky, thinking they didn't look good, but they might not amount to much. Then the gust of wind comes - that same gust of wind that comes right before a tropical torrential downpour is about to happen. Within 2 minutes, it starts to pour down, so all the tourists around the Colosseum are scampering, running to huddle under drink stands. I see a crowd running into what looks like a church, so direct us all to go in there to "claim sanctuary". There were some stunned looking parishioners in prayer-pose (maybe they were praying for more tourists in their lives, and weren't expecting immediate results) and an angry Italian man starts yelling at us all, in Italian. From what we could make out, he was just asking us to be quiet. But he kept on shouting and I wanted to tell him, "It's cool, I'm baptised.", but I don't think that would have been enough for. When the rain got a bit lighter, we left and found that all the men that had been selling hats just 30 minutes ago were now selling umbrellas and ponchos. We walked on a bit, when the rain got heavy again and I noticed hail hitting the ground. And then hitting us. They were maybe 2cm square pieces, but not fun to get pelted by. We had made it to the metro station, so Deirdre got a train back to the hostel, while Natalia and I waited with all the other huddled tourists for it to pass again. Men were still trying to sell ponchos through the crowd. The thunder and lightning started too, and it was right on top of us at one point, but quickly moved on. When the rain had pretty much stopped, Natalia ran off to the Colosseum, and I went to the piazza to find the bus I needed to take to get to my evening with an Italian family. When I was in Barcelona, I had heard through Kayleigh about this website called EatWith - the concept being like 'airbnb' but for food, so essentially, a local person will host you for a meal. I thought it was a great concept, so looked up the places I was going to see where they were running, and found that there was just one going in Rome, with an Italian chef named Cecilia. I got in touch with her to see if they would be able to host me, and no problems at all, I got to spend a lovely evening with a lovely family. I travelled a bit out of the centre, but was met at the bus stop by Cecilia's son Bruno, and then walked to their apartment. Immediately, I felt at home. After a quick tour of the flat, we got settled into the kitchen (where I was provided with a chef hat and apron of red white and green) where I would be helping prepare the food. It was so much fun! Cecilia's husband acted as photographer, taking pictures with both my camera and theirs, as I cut up vegetables, prepared meat and whisked eggs. We chatted about food and travel and food some more, before enjoying the meal. We made spaghetti carbonara (and Cecilia kindly gave me her recipe, so I will be practising this one at home), and saltimbocca (veal, prosciutto and sage, all rolled up together and held with a toothpick, rolled in flour and then shallow fried) with salad, and dessert was made with pineapple pieces we had cooked with sugar and rum, then mixed in with ricotta and cream. Absolutely delicious. All of it. As we sat down to dinner, we watched a DVD about all the different regions of Italy, which just made me hungry for more Italy, and now I know I am definitely coming back, and probably didn't need the Trevi Fountain coin-toss to guarantee that. For my final day in Rome (I would be leaving for Venice that evening), I found myself a walking food tour to go on, because I felt like I hadn't eaten enough things. It was a small group, an American couple, two other Americans, two Australians, me and our tour guide - an American. He has been living in Rome in the same neighbourhood for 5 years, so the tour is him showing us all the local haunts he goes to. It was perfect. We went to a bar first (as in, a bar for coffee), and had some Italian croissants (cornettos) and these fabulous little tirimasus in chocolate cups. Then we went for a slice of Margherita pizza, and a place that was ranked #3 in Rome for Margherita pizza (so that's something). We visited a store for meats and cheeses, and tried some of those. Stopped at a market, had bruschetta, caprese salad, and canoli. (There's still more food) We sat down for three different pastas - ragu, carbonara and I don't know what it's called, but it was essentially just cheese and pepper, and it was perfect. We got the deep friend rice balls from a place that apparently was on Masterchef Australia (and lots of other things, but this was the only one I could relate to), and finally some gelato (and were taught how to tell real gelato from fake gelato). For four hours, we packed a lot in, and I don't think I ate for the rest of the day. It would have been good to do it on my first day in Rome, just so I'd be better equipped for choosing restaurants as our guide gave so many handy tips, but again, I'll just have to return! After all the food, I rushed myself to the Colosseum, as I was also conscious of getting to the airport (there was a Kramer due for a flight, and the airport would expect me there 5 hours early!). I was prepared to have to wait even though I had a ticket, and was unnerved at the easiness to get in. I quite literally just walked right in. Oh well, not complaining. I still whizzed around the place, grateful to be on my own so that kind of thing was possible but also tried to take in as much as I could. I dodged through shuffling tourists to get to good viewpoints, got my snaps, and made my way back to the hostel. A very rushed Colosseum trip, but I still saw a whole lot of it, and maybe next time I'll do it slower ;) The whole shuttle bus back to the airport system was.. interesting. I asked the hostel reception what the procedure was and they said I could buy a ticket on the bus. I got there, and there was a line of people all holding the same ticket-looking item in their hand. I see a girl with a maple leaf flag on her backpack, so ask her if I need to buy a ticket first and find out that I do. But then her and her friend are panicked about missing their flight and have decided to get a taxi, so I buy one of their tickets. Good. I try and find out if the line I'm kind of on is going to the airport I need to go to, and an American lady tells me I need to go into the office to get a "boarding pass". Okay... So I go in, and get a piece of orange laminated paper that has my airport on it, and the man tells me it''s for 6 o'clock. So eventually, I've worked out that the "boarding passes" are for different airports, and different times of departure, so you are guaranteed a seat on a bus at a certain time. But this was never explained clearly, and there's a gaggle of confused tourists hovering over the road. The girl there is trying to perform her best crowd control and eventually becomes very angry. The tourists are all panicked about missing their flights, and confused why they can't get on the bus that is leaving now for their airport, and she is getting frustrated because she's told so many people they have to wait and to wait out of the way of the road. My bus comes, and people are crowding and pushing to get on it. Another girl is taking the boarding passes and shouts "Everyone calm okay? You have a seat! Don't worry!", and I could see her faith in humanity fading as desperate tourists are pushing at her to get onto the bus. I wait my turn, and throw her the sincerest "grazie" I could muster as I gave her my ticket, and she smiled and I saw a bit of faith in humanity come back. Not all us tourists are jerks, promise. That evening I flew to Venice, and that is where I am now. But that's another blog. Rome was just an amazing place, and I could have had longer there, but still feel like I got the most out of the time I did have there. But I will be returning one day, because I threw 10 cents into the Trevi Fountain, and you can't break a guarantee like that.
Nice Day For It
If you read the last post, you may have discerned that my trip from Lyon to Nice wasn't the most comfortable, as it resulted in my throwing out my backpack in favour of a suitcase. I think I worked out 5 minutes was my maximum standing time with the backpack on before I felt like I was undergoing some kind of medieval torture, and that it is definitely impossible for me to lift it from the ground and onto my back without the help of a European man who was definitely doing it because they felt they should, not because they cared. Still, not complaining. My train from Lyon only went as far as Marseille, where I retrieved my backpack, noticing the bottom zipper had been opened - this section was only for toiletries, and I guess there's no value for those on the black market - but nothing taken, and waited for my train moving onto Nice. We stopped in Cannes and a British couple got on, the woman exclaiming that the late train (I hadn't realised) was "such a nightmare". I do love a good travel complainer. I know I'm not exempt from that group, but my complaints tend to be about other travellers. This woman's whole day had become a "nightmare" because the train was running 15 minutes late. I wish my life was that good that something like that could be constituted as a "nightmare". In my hostel in Lyon, I overheard a newly arrived Aussie guy chatting to the receptionist/bartender about his train dramas. "Some guy, loike, suicided or something so it was all delayed. It was heaps shit I've been on the go for like 6 hours or something just 'cause of this bloke. Worst day of my holiday." I really felt for him, you know. It must have been so bad for him to have missed out on more beer drinking time. Much worse a day for him than for the guy who "suicided"s family, or the train driver who would've seen the whole thing happen. This Australian guy had a different place to go to pubs in! Anyway, I got into Nice and struggled with my backpack to the taxi rank, and seemed to be the first one there. Although it was a bit confusing, as there's loads of roadworks around so it wasn't really clear where the taxi rank was. After 5 to 10 minutes, I saw a free cab roll in, so walked towards it, and at the same time, two American girls came walking towards it. One said, "Oh" when I approached the cab, but what she really meant was, "Bitch don't be taking this cab" I said, "Sorry, I was waiting at the taxi rank" while mopping the sweat from my brows and demonstrating by huffing how heavy my backpack was on my back. I also emphasised the fact that I was alone. I did this by not talking to anyone around me, I feel that has the most effect. "Oh, we flagged it," said Whore #1, standing there in nice clothes, with a nice suitcase, next to her equally nicely presented friend. "Is this the taxi rank, then?" I asked, using the kind of sarcasm that only a non-American would pick up on, without realising my error. "Or do you know where it is?" "It's like here..." She said awkwardly, "So yeah, we waved it down so..." And being the polite, non-American that I am, I said, "Fine" (but threw my hands up in the air a little, to demonstrate polite frustration) and let them have the cab. They got in, and I wished I'd done something more to show them the wrong they'd done, but instead handed their souls over to travel karma. May they get incurable STIs, sunburn so bad it hurts to wear clothes, food poisoning so awful they're trapped in their hotel room (that turns out to be a lot worse than the TripAdvisor reviews they'd read about it) and every future form of transport delayed. That'll show them. The next cab came a few minutes later, and I all but pushed women and children out of the way to get it. Relieved, I got in and said where I needed to go. The driver was young, friendly, and a good level of English, so we chatted while we crawled through summertime Nice traffic, and I started feeling better about the whole day. The receptionist at the hostel was also lovely, and I was delighted to learn the shower wasn't a push button one like the ones in Paris and Lyon, but one that I could control the temperature of, AND leave on for as long as I like. Luxury! I'd arrived mid-afternoon, so took myself on a walk and went and bought my new red suitcase. I took myself on a romantic seaside dinner for one, where I enjoyed an asparagus risotto and my own company. Things were nice again. I had a luxuriously long sleep, despite two German girls in my dorm pissing about the room for two hours. Worst Germans ever. I don't even know what they were doing. How can it possibly take you two hours to get ready in the morning? What kind of beauty procedure are you following? Aren't Germans meant to be efficient? (I'm allowed to say that, it's in my blood, and I AM efficient). All the while they whispered to each other, thinking that this wouldn't cause offence to anyone. After they'd eventually left, I got up and another girl in the room commented on how noisy they'd been. I was thankful it wasn't just me. The day wasn't looking to shape up to be a nice one, weather-wise. So I stayed in bed a little longer. Later, I dressed and decided to just sit near the beach and read, seeing as the clouds and temperature weren't going to dictate a sunbathing day for me. On my way there, I stopped to look at some postcards outside a store. I picked up and went in, and found that it was some kind of antique/just old and useless shit store. The storeman was sitting at a little wooden school desk drinking a tea, tearing up a baguette and smearing it with marmalade. I didn't want to disturb his breakfast, but seeing as he was the only one about, I handed over the postcards, embarrassed that my selection involved a lot of boobs and some cats. He didn't seem to care as he shakily counted them, and then the phone rang. He apologised in French, and I tried to make a face that said "don't worry about it, take your time, I'm in no rush, really it's no trouble at all, I'll be here". As he spoke on the phone, I looked at the unusual collection of wares in his store. A lot of old touristy things. Thimbles. That's the tourist collector item that's always baffled me. Fridge magnets, key rings, even iron on patches, I understand. But thimbles? Firstly, no one really uses them unless they quilt, and there's not many of those around. Secondly, are you supposed to display them in a special thimble display case? Because I've seen real thimbles (I know a quilter), and the souvenir ones don't seem very practical. And where does one get a thimble display case? Are they tiny? Can you use them to display other things? His store also had a lot of old books, some paintings, little statues of Napoleon Bonaparte's head selling for 50 Euro, some tarot cards and for some reason, glue sticks. He got off the phone after a few minutes, made an apology and sold me the postcards. I threw out my sincerest "merci beaucoup" to him, and left to sit by the seaside. I was there a little while and then the sun decided to peek through the clouds, so I dashed back to my hostel, changed into my swimsuit, and back to the pebbled beach to see if lying down on a pile of rocks with just a towel in between could be comfortable. I actually think it may have been therapeutic for my backpack pains. Very nice indeed. I paddled about in the water a little, and willed the clouds to stay away. The sun came out later in the afternoon, so I did get a good stretch out there in the end. A very Nice day indeed. So this is me for France, as tomorrow I fly to Rome! I've been trying to avoid eating Italian foods until I get there, but it's so tricky with pizza and pasta being everywhere's go-to food in Nice. Unless I wanted to spend a lot more money on more Frenchy type foods, these were my options. So tonight I got a penne arrabiatta and was a bit saddened by its watery state. "Should've waited until Italy," I thought to myself. But then I thought maybe it was a good thing for me to have substandard pasta so close to me getting there, as it gives me good comparison rights. France has been enjoyable, I have eaten a lot of delightful things here, and have even left a lot of the traditional stuff for when I come again some day. I didn't find any of the stereotypical rude Frenchies you hear so much about it, which has been nice. But I also had to remind myself that most of the French people I've communicated with have been in the hospitality or customer service industry, so it's in their job description to be nice. Still, you can have rude hospitality workers anywhere. It's been fun listening to people speaking French around me, and even more fun being mistaken for being one of them. As I was waiting at Lyon station to find out which platform my train would be departing from, a shaky little old man with a walking cane was also staring at the screen. He then approached me and said something in French. It was this exchange that made me so grateful that I'd memorised how to say, "I'm sorry, I don't speak French". He chuckled out of mild embarrassment, and tried to youngsters next to me. Now, I wish they would put it differently in the phrase books. Telling someone I "don't" speak French, infers that I am able to, I just don't. I wish they'd make it so I could say "I can't speak French", just so it's clear that I would if I were able to, I just simply cannot. Of course, I could type that into Google translate and memorise that, but that would show too much effort to learning a phrase in a language that I'm trying to have people believe I'm unable to speak. My brain hurts. So au revoir, France! You've been beautiful, and I hope to see you again someday. Bonjourno Italia!
Adios, Mi Mochila
I'm taking a little break from blogging about the everyday travels in order to say goodbye to a dear friend of mine, my backpack. If you've been reading these blogs lately, you may have noticed a trend in me complaining about being too old for dorms, and too old for backpacking. Now, seeing as I'm too poor to not stay in dorms in Europe, I can only really fix one of these things. Today, as I caught the metro to Lyon's major train station, struggling with my 18 kilos of belongings strapped to my back, sweating profusely (it was only 22 degrees at this point of the day), back aching and tears nearly welling, I decided it was time to move on from the backpacking stage of my life and graduate to suitcases. Not that I haven't travelled with a suitcase before, it's just that now I think I can't strap things onto my back any more. It's suitcases or nothing. So today, in Nice, I set off and bought myself a big red suitcase on sale for 70 Euro. I was delighted to learn it fit all of my things with even a bit of extra wiggle room in case I do happen to fall into shops that want me to buy things from them (it happens). I transferred everything over and shoved my backpack under my bunk bed, wondering how I could dispose it. Do I just leave it here? Will they trace it back to me and make me pay some kind of backpack removal fee? That's all worries for Future Bridget, but for now, I want to say goodbye to my Mochila (I never got around to naming my backpack, but seeing as 'mochila' is Spanish for backpack, and the first place I took it was South America, it seemed fitting. I think I referred to it as 'Mochila' in a blog or two back then, so let's go with that....) Dear Mochila, It is time we went our separate ways. You've been a great travel companion to me over the years, and the only constant, but it's time to say goodbye. After all, travelling is all about goodbyes, in a way. The start of your trip, you say goodbye to your home. Each place you go to, you meet new people and inevitably say goodbye to them when you move onto the next place. You say goodbye to comforts, regular TV shows and personal hygiene. Sometimes you say goodbye to your dignity. And eventually, you say goodbye to your travel time and get back into the real world. We've shared some good times together, Mochila. There was that time in Buenos Aires where we were walking back to my apartment from the train station, and a man squirted sunscreen on you, pretending it was bird poo and offered to clean it off you so he could take you away. You're lucky I'm such an intuitive friend, and protectively took you away from him. What about the time we walked up that mountain on Lake Titicaca because I didn't want the local children to bear your weight? And then I was so exhausted from the hike and the altitude that I vomited over someone's balcony after 2 sips of beer? That was a good day for us. I have not only used you to carry my things, my clothes and my souvenirs, but I have also sat on you. A lot. In airports, at train stations and in hostel receptions that wouldn't let me check in because I should've thought to catch a later bus into town and not wake up the receptionist. Sorry if I was heavy, but think of it as karmic retribution. Yep, we have shared some good memories together, Mochila, but I'm afraid we've outgrown each other. Me figuratively, but you have literally outgrown me. It hurts to even pick you up. I know that may be my fault for not doing weights at the gym, but until I have needy children that demand to be picked up all the time, there will be no more heavy lifting for Bridget. Plus my spine isn't as strong as it used to be, despite my cheese intake (and therefore calcium intake) being a lot higher. I know you don't mean to hurt me, but you do, and neither of us should be in a toxic relationship like this. It's for the best. So, adios Mochila. All the best. And I'm sorry if I end up dumping you in a French street because I don't know what else to do with you. I'm also sorry if I end up just leaving you under a dorm bed and you are left here for all eternity, watching other loved and in-use backpacks come and go. Never forget the memories, Mochila, because I won't. Muchos amor, Bridget x
Bon Apetit
My Bastille Day was a pretty lazy one, and after the freaky cheese dreams of the night before (I dreamt I spontaneously decided to donate my stomach by cutting it out myself - I didn't bleed at all - and taking it to a hospital) a decidedly non-cheese filled day. I slept in, had a terrifying shower and set off. The reason the shower was terrifying is because it didn't have taps. It had a button. A button you push, and water shoots out for about 20 seconds. If this isn't enough shower time for you, you have to push the button again. It takes about 3 pushes of the button for the water to warm up, by which point it is boiling and you don't have the option of adjusting the temperature. Thanks, Paris. Anyway, I set off for breakfast as I'd slept through the hostel's free breakfast of stale croissants and sat out the front of a cafe, where I enjoyed coffee and nutella pancakes. Because I'm an adult, and I get to have things like that for breakfast if I want to. I'd slept through the Bastille Day parade that goes down Les Champs Elysees, and wasn't sure what would be open, so decided to go look at the Moulin Rouge. As I sat on the metro, I was approached by a group of tourists with a map in hand. I got ready to tell them apologetically I was a tourist too, and probably couldn't help them. The man spoke French at me, politely, and was pointing to Notre Dame on his map. He then pointed to a nearby Metro station, so I figured he was asking if he should change at the stop to get to Notre Dame. I said, "oui", but he had more questions. He pointed at the map some more, at the station that would take him too Notre Dame, but showed that there wasn't a clear link to get from the line we were on, to that one. I pointed back at the first stop he pointed at, and tried to communicate that it wouldn't be a far walk from there. His face had this look of dawning realisation, and he threw out the old, "Parlez-vous francais?", I took a breath so I could try and look sorry and replied, "non." I almost did it, I almost fooled them into thinking I was a Parisian. Next time, maybe. I got to Moulin Rouge, took a photo and was told by my camera that there wasn't any more room for that. So I didn't stay long, walked around a little and decided I'd seen these same tourist stores elsewhere so headed back to the hostel to sort the camera situation out, and sort out my stuff so I could head out for the evening. For as any good national holiday calls for, there would be fireworks! And they would be at the Eiffel Tower! I was so there. I set off in the late afternoon, back on the Metro, and decided to get off at the Louvre and walk from there. I knew the Louvre was doing free entrance for the holiday, so when I walked through and there was no line whatsoever but people still walking in, I was surprised but followed them in. All the exhibitions were closed now, so I didn't get to see any of the art, but I still got to go inside the Louvre and had the option of buying stuff from their gift stores, so there's always that. I walked along the Seine and followed the crowd heading for Champs du Mars, reputedly the best spot to watch the fireworks from as they would be behind a silhouette of the Eiffel Tower. I was happy to find myself an actual seat on a bench with a decent view of the whole thing. So I sat there for four hours or so, guarding the spot with my life. I was next to a French couple for the first two hours or so, and later an older French lady asked if she could squeeze in. I don't think the French lady ever figured out I couldn't understand her, because whenever she said something to me, I would just laugh or smile or say something like "c'est la vie" whenever it seemed appropriate. It took a while for the couple to figure it out too, until the woman eventually threw the old "parlez-vous francais?" at me, and I again apologetically replied "non". There were loads of people there, as was to be expected. I saw two, what I will call duel-challenges. They can't be called fights. I saw a man slap another man. Not a punch. Not a shove. Not a barge. A slap. French crowds get crazy! I saw a girl shove another girl into the people seated below her. Absolute madness. In the half hour before the fireworks, there was an orchestral concert held under the Eiffel Tower, because France is fancy like that. From what I gathered, they were playing songs just by French composers, and played pretty much all of 'Carmen'. The last song was sung by an impassioned looking man, and I assumed it would be the national anthem. However, nobody in the crowd was acting anthemy. By that I mean no one was standing, no one was singing along, no one was saluting any flags or holding any hands over any hearts. They were all just sitting about chatting some more. So maybe it wasn't the national anthem. But I felt like it was the kind of event that calls for the national anthem to be sung. Odd. The fireworks themselves ran for about half an hour and were pretty good, but I still think Sydney does them best. The song choice was odd and included Nirvana, Queen, and that 80s song "Living in America" for some reason. Getting home was only going to be achievable by walking, so I set off, dodging the crowds and miraculously and quickly navigating my way back to the hostel. Great success. The next morning was an early start, a cab to the train station and a train to Lyon. I got a cab to the hostel out of laziness again, but didn't have any cash left on me. I searched around the train station in Lyon for an ATM but there wasn't one anywhere. So I figured the cab would have a card thingy. It didn't, but the driver kindly took me to an ATM near my hostel so I could get some, and explained to me (in French, so I'm really just guessing here) that the normal taxis only take cash, but the special ones take cards. Thanks, taxi man. I dumped my things and set off for Lyonnaise adventures. Turns out my hostel isn't near any of the action, so I was in for a lot of walking. I found a cute little medieval section of town, and a museum devoted to miniature sets from films. So I went in there and saw a miniature Statue of Liberty from a Superman film, a miniature train from some other film where a train crashes, and lots of tiny sets of restaurants, bedrooms and prisons. Unusual, but a good activity for an hour or so. I wandered around the centre of town a bit before I became too exhausted to do that anymore, so went back to the refuge of the hostel. It is a nice hostel. I'd forgotten what nice hostels were like. It still has the terrifying showers that the Paris one did (maybe it's a French thing?) but other than that, the rooms are big, they have powerpoints next to every bed and lockers and a big kitchen. So I decided it was time to cook myself a meal (and also because there wasn't anything that near to my hostel). I went to the supermarket and was overwhelmed by my options. All the cheeses, all the butter, all the wine. It was just so overwhelming, I'm surprised I went out of there with as little as I did. I got back to the hostel, made some chicken and vegetables (with a load of butter, onion and garlic, just so I could feel French), and went to bed pretty early again. I slept away the aches and pains. I really do think I've gotten too old to carry a backpack around with me everywhere. This might be the last time I do it, the way my body is feeling now. I decided today would be a less walking day, and after discovering where the Metro station was, it would be achievable. So in the morning I set off for Les Halles de Lyon - a food market! Because that's what I need, is more food. It was amazing. So many cheese stalls with hundreds of different types of cheeses. Butchers, bakers, and I think there actually may have been a candle stick maker. Chocolatiers and wine vendors. Fish stands. Everything, really. So I bought myself a chocolate croissant, some macarons, a bit of Brie, a raspberry tart and some nectarines. I took my goodies to the botanic gardens nearby and enjoyed a little picnic for one there, using my map as a blanket. I got ready to guard my food as the ducks from the pond nearby came to investigate me and my food. I'm used to more aggressive birds in outdoor eating situations, but these ducks were super passive. Maybe because people eat them a lot here. They were good company for my picnic, and their gaggle (or whatever a group of ducks is called) included a duckling. Adorable. After my picnic I had a rest, and then walked in the park a bit, and found some deer. I'm not sure why they were in the public park, but I can roll with it. I then decided I'd start making my way back to the hostel, and found a tram stop near the park. I hadn't caught one yet, and there wasn't a ticket booth at the stop, so tried my luck hopping on the tram. There was the driver, and a man next to the driver. The man next to the driver was smiling and holding out a ticket. I looked at him and got ready to say the name of the station I wanted to go to and he put the ticket in my hand, taking the 2 Euro coin out of my other and said, "merci!". Easy transaction. I sat down, and a man said something to me in French and mimed putting the ticket through a machine and pointed behind me. I assumed this to mean I needed to validate it, so I put it in a machine, returned and the man smiled at me in approval. Good job Bridget! I switched onto the Metro, and was about to purchase my ticket. A man was standing next to the ticket machine and said to me, "Excusez-moi mademoiselle, billet?" (I've worked out that billet means ticket), and he then went on to explain more in French. I only caught what sounded like "two minutes", but in French, and figured he was offering me his ticket that would expire in two minutes. I said "oui, merci", took his ticket, put it through the gate and was off on my merry and free way. I was on the way to the hostel, but decided to get off at a station when I saw there was a funicular! It might just be because the name contains the word 'fun' but I do enjoy a good funicular. And this one was going to a viewpoint! Yay! I got off, went up the funicular and went looking for a view point to look at stuff from. It took me a good while to find it, but I think I did, and I had a lovely view over Lyon. Not half bad. Instead of walking back up to where I'd gotten off the funicular, I thought it would be best if I just continued ambling on downhill, and eventually got to the Metro again. Via a store I had passed the day before. A biscuit store. Piles upon piles of biscuits that looked hand made. I had to buy some. Lyon has been nice. It's been nice to be in a place that's not as busy as Paris, and nice to be away from loads of tourists. But you know what else is going to be nice? Nice! I go there tomorrow on the train, and am excited for some more beach. I'm sure it will be nice.
Leaving Spain and Romancing Myself in Paris
I left the hostel in San Sebastián pretty early to get my journey to Paris started, but also because I'm a Kramer and we like to do things early. Otherwise we panic and/or melt. I'm not sure if the melting bit is true, because we've never been late so I haven't seen it happen. But I bet it's true. I digress. With no help from anyone at San Sebastian's bus stop (one driver looked annoyed that I'd even thought to ask him a question), I found my bus to Pamplona. Good. One hour. I had a nice moment where I was struggling to lift my backpack out of the luggage hold under the bus, and the driver looked up and said, "Ayuda?", or something like that, and I was grateful for remembering that it probably meant he was asking me if I wanted help, so I gracefully said "Si, gracias" and put lots of "muchos" before my second gracias. I grabbed a taxi to Pamplona airport, and another nice moment where the taxi driver - probably in his 50s or 60s - was scanning the radio stations, and settled on one playing dance music in English. I think because he wanted me to feel comfortable, and knowing that I was young and English-speaking, I would probably like this music. But I didn't, but I was too polite to ask him to change the station. So we both sat in that cab, in silence, out of politeness and not wanting the other to feel uncomfortable, even if we felt uncomfortable ourselves. Pamplona airport was dull. One shop. About 4 flights leaving there a day. I soon learnt that my flight to Barcelona (where I would connect to another to Paris) was cancelled. Second flight of the trip cancelled, same airline. But, they organised a bus to take us to Barcelona, which they said would take about 4 or 5 hours. I asked to get my connecting flight moved back, which was no problem at all. So in the end, I would only be arriving into Paris about 2 hours later than originally planned - no big drama, just made the day a bit longer. But it was a big drama for some people, with lots of indignant Australians (one who announced to some she'd just met, "I turn 20 next week! Wooo!") demanding written notice of the flight cancellation so they could claim it on travel insurance. I'm not really one to complain about things, mostly because the hassle of it all exhausts me, and I'd rather spend my time doing other things. Yeah, it was annoying that the flight was cancelled and we didn't get an explanation, but the airline did sort an alternative out for us (and pretty quickly too), and had back up plans - if I couldn't make my new connecting flight, they'd put me in a hotel in Barcelona and fly me out the next day. So really, they're still doing their part in getting me to my destination, it's just in a round a bout way. I do have travel insurance, but I'd rather not use it. Too many phone calls and complaining and proving things, when I could be eating cheese or something instead. It's mostly there for if I get hit by a taxi or punched by a homeless person. Anyway. It wasn't just the Australians getting arced up, as I had just got to my turn to be served by the ticketing office, I was queue jumped by two older Spanish women, and another one with a baby who were demanding answers AND NOW from the poor ticket officer lady. And then an Italian guy jumped in, speaking in some kind of Spanish/English/Italian combination (I call it Spanglishiano) to the manager. It was all very amusing. After all that, the bus came and took us to Barcelona in about 6 and a half to 7 hours, I made my flight to Paris, got a bus into the centre of town and a taxi to my hostel. I even earned a thumbs up from my Parisian cabbie when I said "merci beaucoup" at the end of the trip. 12 hours of a travel time. Bam. So, Paris! I'd heard mixed reviews. People either seem to love it or they hate it. I think I will put myself in the former category. I made sure to get up early this morning to get the most out of my day, as my stay here is short and one of those days is Bastille Day, so I don't think it'll be a normal day in Paris for that. First off, I walked to the Catacombs, and found a stagnant line to put myself at the end of. Turns out they weren't open for another hour, but it was good to get my spot now. So I stood there, between an American couple and a Canadian family, hoping a mime would come along to entertain us. It didn't. I had forgotten two things about myself before I got into the catacombs - I'm scared of ghosts, and I'm scared of going down stairs. I'd failed to realise I'd need to descend 130 steps (in a spiral, no less) into a pile of skeletons. I got myself the audio guide for an extra 3 Euros so I would have a companion, and made sure to try and walk near people. The catacombs were pretty cool. I got over the ghost fear pretty quickly, because the piles of bones were innumerable, that I thought the ghosts of them would get too crowded in there, so are probably haunting other things like boarding schools and churches. There were seriously a lot of bones in there, it's hard to think that they were all people at one point, because of the number that are there. I set off for Notre Dame next, but had a pit stop at a bistro on the way, as the catacombs excursion had taken up my whole morning (the waiting time was about 2 hours, and I spent maybe an hour in there), and I needed a food & bathroom break. I liked that there was no English menu option at this place, and I don't know why. It made it really difficult to pick something. But luckily I'd downloaded a French dictionary app on my phone, so I could figure out what was what, but ended up getting the chicken dish I saw on another woman's plate. And I can't stop thinking about this lunch. It came with green beans, which were blanched beautifully, and I was so happy as I don't think I've had vegetables the entire time I've been away (about a month now). The chicken was seared, so the fatty exterior was crispy and delicious. There was some kind of garlicky/buttery/oniony sauce poured over it all and I was in heaven. So simple, but so amazing. I was also proud of ordering a cafe au lait, and not saying it like, "cafe, OLE!" Notre Dame was amazing, of course. I didn't go inside, as I was done with queues for the day. And I decided to save my "giant church inside visit" for St. Peter's in Rome. I wandered around the outside of the cathedral, wondering which was the bell tower that houses (note that I use present tense) Quasimodo, and trying to spot his gargoyle friends. I didn't find them. So I was now on the north side of the Seine, and walked myself along it, past a lot of second hand book stalls. I got to the Louvre, where I was only interested in seeing the queue and the giant triangle thingy. I found them both, and was again saddened at the lack of mimes entertaining people in the queue. Pick up your game, Paris. I carried on my solo walking tour down Les Champs Elysees. And yes, you'll be glad to hear, it IS a busy street. And a crazy woman yelled at me in French. I decided she was a street performer, and carried on my merry way. I was tempted by the sales in the stores, and may have made a few purchases (half because I wanted a bag from H&M with the 'Les Champs Elysees' address printed on it). I ended up at the Arc de Triomphe, where I attempted to perfect my selfie-taking skills. I'm not all that good at them for a solo traveller. Guess I'll just have to practise. I saved the big guy for my last stop of the day. My feet were growing weary, but I could push on to get to the Eiffel Tower. Of course I could. And I was impressed by it. It's funny seeing an icon like that that's been replicated so many times, and appears in so many places. Even though I've seen the mock-version of it in Las Vegas, the real deal is of course a whole lot better. Even with the men jangling hundreds of metal Eiffel Tower key chains at you chanting "One Euro, One Euro". And even with the hundreds of people getting their photos taken in front of the Tower, the photo they've been dreaming of having since they were a child, and now they've got their poses perfected. It wasn't just the Eiffel Tower that had people perfecting poses in front of, but all over Paris. I called them 'Parisian Poses'. It was mostly the women-folk who had this repertoire, but it seems that Paris turns every woman into an amateur model. Endless entertainment. Now extremely weary after being on my feet for about 8 hours, I started to drag myself towards the hostel. But, via the gardens of Luxembourg, which were also beautiful. It was nearing dinner time by this point, so with a quick search of Yelp, I found that there was a French bistro down the road from my hostel that Anthony Bourdain had visited on an episode of No Reservations, so it was immediately sold to me. It's called 'Le Papillon', for those of you playing at home. From what I gathered, they change the menu daily, depending on what produce they get from the local butchers, cheese mongers, bakeries, etc. each day. I looked up at the chalkboard menu, all in French, realised I recognised the word for cheese (very important), so ended up ordering myself a cheese board and a red wine. Perfect dinner! And it was absolutely divine. I have no idea what all the cheeses were, but there were about 6 varieties, as well as some mini gherkins, and two types of cold cuts, and a basket of crusty breads. So enjoyable. Yeah, I guess you could say my first day in Paris was a success. I saw the big players of the sight seeing game, and had two very good meals. I was an excellent date for myself, I know how to treat a lady. I hope I call me tomorrow, I had a really nice time with me. Hopefully I don't come on too strong and scare myself away. So, tomorrow is Bastille Day. I saw seats getting set up along Les Champs Elysees, and some stage stuff near the Eiffel Tower, so it looks like stuff is going to go down tomorrow. I'll figure it out then. But I have really exhausted myself today, so it is time to say 'bonnuit', so I can go and have weird cheese dreams.
Bulls
I did look at more things in my last day in Seville. I still didn't get a good orientation of the place, though. I think the streets were built by 4 year olds with ADD. But after getting lost for a few hours, I found my way to the bull ring, as Seville is one of the places that still hosts bull fights. I did a tour around with a guide that looked so unimpressed to have to show people around and explain things in two languages. I took myself on a lunch date for some more tapas, and enjoyed some gazpacho (and almost ordered 'Gestapo'. Europe can be confusing sometimes) and this lamb shoulder stuffed with cheese. I'm such a good date, I hope I give me a call later. That evening I followed the hostel led tour to a flamenco show, impressing Americans just for being Australian. "You're Aussie? That's awesome!" (and we're not really a rare breed here, but I appreciated the enthusiasm. It's usually only dogs that get that excited when you do nothing but be.) It was a great show, and helped add to my sense of seeing all the stereotypical Spanish things. I had an early start to start my journey to Pamplona via Barcelona. I'd decided to book myself onto a package thing for San Fermin (Running of the Bulls) out of ease - they deal with getting you there and finding accommodation, but didn't realise we would actually be staying in San Sebastián, an hour away from Pamplona. So my day of travel involved taxi - plane - plane - taxi - bus - taxi. 10 hours later, I'm at the hostel surrounded by Australians and beginning to wonder if I'd done the right thing putting myself on one of these tours. Not that I dislike Australians, it's just that once they're in big groups and/or on tours like this, they tend to be jerks. And yeah, I'm a jerk too, but a different kind of jerk. A tolerable jerk (in my own opinion), and I don't think I'll help someone understand me if I speak English louder rather than clearer. Anyway, turns out the organisers had cleverly put people in rooms of their own age, so I was sharing with another girl my age from Melbourne who was travelling alone, and a group of 3 girls from Malabar, and 2 girls from Japan who never said much. The first evening we got shepherded around San Sebastián by one of the guides, and I am trying to decide whether I love this town more than Barcelona. It has that holiday feel, and is small, but without having nothing to do. The beach is lovely (much better than Barcelona's man made one), and the locals a lot more open and friendly than the places I've been so far. Not that they've been unfriendly elsewhere, I'll give an example.. I bought some postcards in Seville from a tourist shop. I asked the lady in the store I bought them at if she had stamps. She simply responded, "no." I still had these postcards with me here, so I went to a newspaper kiosk and asked the man if he had any stamps. He responded, "No, but you can buy them at tobacco shops" (in Spanish). I then had to find a tobacco shop, but thought I'd check a tourist shop on the way just in case. Same response, "Sorry, no, but you can buy them at tobacco shops". So helpful. (I did eventually find a tobacco shop and bought the stamps - so you can rest easy now). Anyway, so our first night we went on a 'pinxtos crawl'. Pinxtos are the tapas of the Basque region, and they are wonderful. Basically, a bar has a pile of plates of different little portions of food (mostly served on a piece of bread). You grab an empty plate, put on it what you want, show the bartender, pay and enjoy. Some places also do hot pinxtos which you order but they're made for you in a flash. It is the best way of eating. It suits my indecisiveness when it comes to food, because I get to eat all kinds of different delicious things. And it suits solo travelling too, because there's no boring waiting time between ordering my food and waiting for it to arrive (sometimes Facebook checking just gets a bit dull. And don't even mention restaurants that don't have wifi!) as the food is already ready! So I enjoyed some capsicums stuffed with tuna & mayonnaise, foie gras, chorizo, croquettes, and steak on a stick seared quickly so it's really pink on the inside. Heavenly. After the pinxtos lesson we ended up at a pub that was showing footage of past years' San Fermin races, with all the boys getting increasingly excited and nervous about racing the next day. As one Aussie guy said, "Aw look mate, if I told my mates back home that I was in Pamplona and didn't run they'd be all like 'what the fuck mate?' so you gotta do it aye". It couldn't be put more eloquently. (It never crossed my mind that I should run, in case you were wondering. For one point, I'm not a natural runner. If there was a life or death situation that involved running, I'd most likely choose to fall into the foetal position and hope for the whole thing to blow over. The run is about 900 metres long, and although you don't have to run the full length (there are different starting points), I have no confidence in my abilities. Also, I have terrible survival skills. I'd be like George Costanza in a kitchen fire, pushing women and children out of my way so I can get out - although I'd probably fail at doing this and kill us all. And it's not even the bulls that I'm scared of - it's the hundreds (or thousands? I should look up facts) of other people running that are shitting their pants and lose all sense of morality and selflessness, if they had any to begin with. So yeah, don't go on reading this thinking that I ended up on the course because that would just be silly. I prefer to watch people panic. Preferably while I'm sitting down, possibly eating something.) With a 3.30AM start, we all assembled outside of the hostel in our uniforms - a white t-shirt with our tour company's logo emblazoned on it, and a little red scarf to wear around our necks. It's tradition for runners to wear all white, the red scarf and some have one around their waists. I'm not sure why it's tradition to where all white, but I like to think it's so it's easier to spot who has shat their pants out of fear so mocking is easy too. The bus took us to Pamplona (about an hour long journey), we dropped off the idiots that decided they were going to do the run, with girlfriends hugging their boyfriends goodbye, and me wondering if I would see anyone die today. The rest of us made our way into the bull ring, where the run would end up. After the big bulls from the run have gone to the other side, the arena fills up with the runners who then play with a baby bulls that has corks on its horns. The race started at 8 and only goes for a few minutes, so we had a good two hours sitting there trying to stay awake, and having stilted Spanglish conversations with some Spanish boys in front of us. Just after 8 the first lot of runners enter the arena, and a round of "HIJO LA PUTA" (Spanish swearing) is chanted at them and some cups thrown. These people are known as the wusses because they've clearly chosen to start running at the end of the course, and didn't let the bulls get anywhere near them, and so didn't actually run "with" the bulls at any point. I think they're clever. Maybe 30 seconds later a large group of people panic running (there was a big difference between this group and the wuss group) sweep into the arena followed by 6 giant bulls that get herded to the other side into some kind of enclosure. The rest of the runners tear in, jumping up and down and hugging each other for having survived. Then they let in a smaller bull, and he is angry. Not at first, actually. At first he's just confused at the amount of people in the area he's been kicked into. And then the people start to taunt him. They slap his behind, try and touch his face, and flail about in front of him. Naturally, the bull attacks, and the crowd cheers. No one got seriously injured, but I wouldn't be surprised if there were some internal injuries. Most of the people that got cleaned up by a bull deserved it, so that didn't upset me too much. But at one point there was a girl not paying attention, and she got hit twice by a bull. A group of guys came to her aid almost immediately and she was on her feet again in seconds. The activity proved too much for the Melburnian, who sat with her eyes covered chanting, "I don't like this. They're so mean", whereas I felt it was more like a train wreck. I felt sorry for the bull because it was just confused and probably scared, and then people kept antagonising it too. The only person I felt sorry for in the ring was the girl. Everyone else that got hit had it coming. But then the worse they got hit, the more crowd appreciation they got, so their idiocy was rewarded. All very confusing. One guy had got into the ring with a backpack on (I'd heard the police kick you off the run if you have ANYTHING with you, so he must've jumped a fence somewhere along the way), and I'm almost certain he wore it just so the bull had something to catch onto when he got hit (which did happen). He was put on someone's shoulders at the end and cheered loudly. I tried to throw my disgusted face towards him, but I don't think it made it further than the seat in front of me. I should've got the bull to throw it. I felt very Roman watching all these antics, and a bit unsettled by it. I can appreciate the cultural aspect of it, but nowadays there are so many foreigners running it and being the idiots taunting the bulls. Hopefully the baby bulls got a nice big feed of anything after the arena games. Or maybe they ended up as veal. We had a little time in Pamplona between the arena games ending and the bus going back to San Sebastián. Pamplona is probably a lovely town, but during San Fermin is just smells of urine. The party never ends for the ten days of the festival, and there are a lot of people about looking like they'd been partying for ten years straight. The roads are streaming with spilled sangria, beer, and probably more piss. There are people passed out on benches, which could make you think the homeless population is quite high, but chances are, they're Australian. We went in search of coffee, and I proved my worth to some Australians by being able to order take away coffees for them in Spanish. Hello ego boost! Sarah (the Melburnian) and I went to the beach once we got back to San Sebastián and it was delightful to get some sun rays. So nice. The tour company was organising another trip into Pamplona, leaving at 4PM for people who wanted to go to a bull fight, and then to party all night (the bus coming back to San Sebastián at midnight). I decided I didn't want to do either of those activities, because I'm a nana, had also two nights of a few hours' sleep each, and wanted to go the the run again the following morning to watch the actual run. So, I stayed in San Sebastián and went on a lone adventure for more pinxtos and ice cream, and a 7PM bed time. Nobody parties harder than Bitches. NOBODY. I got myself up this morning and wasn't surprised to see the group of people leaving had reduced by about 80% from the previous day. We got into Pamplona, with the people wanting to run to follow one guide, and the people wanting to watch in the arena to follow the other. I wanted to watch from the side lines, so separated myself from the herd, and sought out a good sideline spot. I found a barricade that some people were leaning up that looked like they were staking a spot, so leant on the barricade next to them. After a while they left, and I realised there were two barricades, making a middle section which turned out to be for media and paramedics. But, there was still a spot or two free on the second barricade, and as the gate closed I pushed the latecomers trying to take my spot out of the way and clambered up to the top of the barricade, with the help of a nice Australian guy there with his girlfriend (she gave me the obligatory dirty look, I gave the apologetic but "aren't you lucky you have such a chivalrous boyfriend" look, and all was good). This was at 7AM, so I had to balance my butt on the top of a gate for an hour. That was no easy feat, but I decided if I could sit on a plane for 12 hours, I could do this for an hour. Plus there were drunk people to look at! I even saw a fight break out outside a nearby club! The entertainment never ends in Pamplona. At 8 o'clock, the rocket that signals the start of the race went off, and we start to see the wusses jog past and into the arena. About a minute after the rocket, the panic running people come fleeing by, followed by the bulls. One bull got confused and turned around right near where we were, and bullied a runner into going under the barricade. Oh the drama! I didn't see anyone fall, sadly, but there was a girl with a graze getting treated by a paramedic (they were probably disappointed too at the boring day at work). After the race I decided to fight my way into the arena to look at the games again, and managed to get myself a decent seat above where they let the baby bulls out. They seemed a bit angrier today, and the runners a bit stupider. Good combination. After the games I took myself back to the same coffee place from the day before, and see on the TV in there that the news is talking about San Fermin, wondering if there was a serious injury and/or death, but turns out today was just the quickest the run has ever gone. 2 minutes something. Or at least that's what I think they were saying. Today I took myself back to the beach and have taken it pretty easy. Tonight there are more drinks, and then tomorrow I head for Paris! I'll be sad to say goodbye to Spain, but it's not goodbye, it's 'hasta luego' (see you later). As I've said before, it's been great to use Spanish again, not just for impressing Australians (and taxi drivers - one who made the pretty accurate remark of "Most Australians don't know any languages!") but also for impressing myself at my memory. I can barely remember what I did last week, but remembering how to structure a sentence in another language makes me feel like I should probably get back into learning it again. Plus the food in Spain has been amazing. Pinxtos need to be a thing everywhere, please. I'm excited to go to Paris and other French places, but feeling a bit apprehensive now I've had the advantage of knowing the language here. The only thing I can do in French is ask someone if they want to go to bed with me (thank you 'Lady Marmalade'), and I can't spend my whole time in France doing that, I won't see anything!
Oh what a Seville-in'
I rocked out hard on my last night in Madrid. I went to bed at 10pm. Not that nana-ish when you're not in Europe and not on holiday, but this is the time where you start weighing up your dinner options. I decided maybe my 10pm bedtime might actually make me look really hardcore. Like maybe my other dorm room mates (9 others) might see me snoozing at 10 and think, "Wow, she is so wild that her siesta is at 10! I bet she has dinner at 1am and doesn't even think about arriving at a club until 6am!". I'm pretty sure that's what they were all thinking. It was this night that the thought I've been toying with - the thought that I'm now too old/set in my ways to stay in dorm rooms - came to the fore front. I had to leave at about 6 the following morning to get my flight to Sevilla, and a different person may have gone the route of just staying up all night to make it, but I decided to stick to my nana ways and go to bed early. But that of course didn't stand well with the backpackers staying in a major European city on a Saturday night. Not that they actively bothered me, I just had a lot of trouble doing the whole sleeping thing that I've grown rather fond of. Anyway, I managed to get up and only made a few passive aggressive noises to get my revenge, checked out and asked the reception man to call a cab for me, because fuck the metro at that hour. I waited a Spanish ten minutes and was picked up by a private van. Thanks receptionist, I really want to pay the extra Euros for this. Oh well, it was my only means of getting to the airport now, so I paid double the price of a normal taxi because it was morning and easier. The airport was fine, except for when I put my boarding pass in my mouth, it got stuck and I ended up ripping some skin off in the process. Now I can't eat anything acidic and I LOVE ACIDIC FOODS SO MUCH. Worst. I landed in Sevilla and navigated my way to the hostel, where I decided to try my chances and see if there was a private room available. To my great advantage, there was! And it was available now at this early hour! So I've forked out for a room that's intended for two, but I'm treating my backpack as my travel buddy, and it gets the other bed. Luxury! (*** A side thought I had today while walking down a Main Street with my backpack on: I have never in my life seen a baby pigeon. And for that matter, I haven't seen a pigeon nest. Or pigeon eggs. Where do they lay eggs? What do the babies look like? This realisation made me conclude that pigeons are actually immortal beings created from the Black Plague, and it's just the same millions that have been around for all these years. Anyway, just had to share ***) I've exerted myself in Sevilla today, which is a silly thing to do in 40 degree heat. There was a free walking tour in the morning, and despite being late and having to find the group myself and getting lost in the impossibly confusing streets, I made it to the Cathedral (the third largest in the world. Or Europe. Or maybe Europe is the world, I don't know) and bound into the group, being guided by a friendly Czech girl. I won the crowd over when she was explaining how the Moors had given all sorts of words that start with 'al', and asked for an English example. It didn't take me long to think of one, and figured it was one that a group of backpackers would be able to summon themselves, and it is their primary source of experiencing a country. No one came forward, so I said it - "alcohol!", and they loved it. I think I must've reinforced the drunk Aussie stereotype. Maybe they had heard word about my 10pm siesta habits. The tour was really interesting, and Sevilla is a beautiful city with lots of history attached to it. I won't regale you with history tales (you can catch those on a documentary when there aren't any sitcoms on TV to watch). I made a few one-day-only buddies (as I will call them now), one was a Californian girl about to start med school. She asked what I did in Australia, and I explained I work for a magazine distribution company. "Oh, so you must be totally up to date with the news and stuff!" said she. "Hmm, you could call it news," explained I, "but it's mostly just seeing what the Kardashians are doing" She was surprised that a country as distant and obscure as Australia had even heard about the Kardashians, let alone be interested in keeping up with them. She said that was really embarrassing, and I made some kind of agreement noise to give the impression that I too had no interest in the most famous Armenian-American dynasty. A bit later on she asked, "So... what is the latest on the Kardashians?" "Oh I don't know," I say carelessly, "she had that baby didn't she?" "Yeah! What did they name it? North West?" "Yep." It's about at this point that we both realise that neither of us are above the tribulations of the Kardashian klan, and try not to make comparisons to everything we're being taught of Spanish queens and saintesses with the Kardashians. After the tour, the guide took us to a tapas place that was suspiciously void of locals and the waiters spoke a suspiciously fluent level of English. Nevertheless, the food was good and I got my sangria for my thirst, and chatted to some Germans. Afterwards we all went out for ice cream. I took myself back to the hostel and intended to siesta, but had also made plans to go on the evening walking tour, which only left me a 40 minute window for siesta. Not enough siesta. Still, it was a good respite in my private room with air conditioning. I dragged myself back to the Cathedral (fun fact - Christopher Colombus' tomb is there. Supposedly. Again, for actual facts, I refer you to Google) and met the new tour group, that had the same Germans from the tapas place earlier, as well as a nice Canadian girl, also travelling alone, so we became one-day-only buddies. This tour took us through the old Jewish quarter, with loads of narrow winding streets - ones I had accidentally taken myself down earlier. This time we were led by a Colombian guy, who also wanted to play up the drunk Aussie stereotype at my expense. Why was I the only one on this tour too? What happened to Europe being crawling with us? I'm not complaining at all, it's actually really nice to escape that, but don't make me be the fall guy for that stereotype. After the second tour of the day, it was time for more food. So the Germans (a guy and a girl) and the Canadian and I went to a different place for food recommended by the guide, that was more catered to locals, and even had its own drunk stumbling about the outside tables asking for money. That's the kind of ambience I look for in a place. This time I got some grilled Iberian pork, which came served with a strip of bacon on top. Pork products do require more pork products, and I couldn't help if this serving style was a solid "we got rid of the Jews and the Muslims" reminder by the Catholics that make up Sevilla now. Or if it was just because there is a tonne of pigs running around Spain, and it's only agriculturally sound to serve multiple types simultaneously. Either way, it was delicious, and I was happy. I've now retired to my private quarters (it is really such a luxury after only having that night in Oslo airport hotel - which was near NOTHING, well, except for the airport) and will have a good deep slumber now. The deepest of all slumbers. Because tomorrow I want to look at more things, because I really like looking at things, and there are lots of things to look at. Hasta luego. P.S. I'm sorry for sharing my thoughts on baby pigeons. If you are a bird expert and are able to provide evidence that they do exist, please don't share this with me. I think my Plague theory is a good one, and intend to work on it more when I have the time. Gracias.
Los Borrachos
My main criteria for choice in accommodation for this trip has been location. I don't intend in spending a whole lot of time at my hostels, and value being able to walk to places higher than comfort. I can be comfortable at home. My hostel in Madrid - Las Musas - is located near a small plaza that homes a group of eight or so 'borrachos' (that's 'drunks' to you lot). And it couldn't be more entertaining. They're harmless, because they're too wasted to cause any harm. This afternoon I had my lunch at the place on the corner (menu del dia, for those playing at home - paella for my entree and chicken in garlic sauce for my main. I didn't end up getting that 'fucking salad', and I fear scurvy is imminent) with a free show provided by 'los borrachos'. The drunks don't actually do all that much except hold big bottles of beer in their hands, sway a lot, laugh at each other, and occasionally try to run interference with the sober (or not-at-the-point-of-alocholism-but-still-a-little-toasted) people. As I was sitting on the terrace, enjoying my chicken, one of the drunks stumbled between the tables. Talk about audience involvement! He started slurring at a table of Spaniards near me, and I decided that it wasn't important that I didn't know the words he was using, because it was more than likely that the locals didn't have a clue either. I see the waiter look over the situation playing out with a "not again" look on his face, and comes over to tell the drunk he's bothering the diners. "Estas molestando ellos!" (I love that the verb for 'annoy' in Spanish is molestar. One of my favourites) The drunk sways a bit, looks at the diners and asks, "Estoy molestando? YO?!!" (I'm annoying? ME?!!!) They kind of ignore him and the waiter restates that the drunk is being annoying, and eventually he shuffles off, shouting in slurred Spanish while he goes back to his friends, who I hope assured him that he's not an annoying person, it's just that he's misunderstood. (But I'm pretty sure he wet himself and they all laughed) When I left the blog last, I was about to head out on the free walking tour of Madrid. It was pretty decent, despite us being a group of about 30-odd following an English girl around (she said she was from Glastonbury. I had no idea people actually came from there), and she knew her stuff. It did take a lot of my will power to ignore the Seinfeld-raised person inside of me to not say whenever she mentioned the Moors, "Oh no, I'm sorry, but it's the Moops." The main thing I got from today was learning where the phrase 'shitfaced' comes from. Hundreds of years ago (I forget the date, but they were pre-toilet days, so sometime around when Joan Rivers was born, I imagine), they used buckets as toilets, and when the buckets were full, they'd toss them out the window into the streets. If you had gotten yourself so drunk that you were stumbling about in the streets, and happened to land face first into the tossed out excretions, your face would inevitably be covered in shit. Hence, shit-faced. I feel like this was a really important thing to learn on my trip to Europe. As said in the last blog as well, my plan tonight was to go to the gay pride parade. I was scared off the Oslo one by the rain, but the only things due to rain in Madrid were men. And possibly glitter. I had a conflict of when to get there. I couldn't decide whether the stereotypical gay love of planning would overcome to stereotypical Spanish tendency to start things much later than announced. I also had to battle with my stereotypical German (by blood) earliness. So, my way of compromising all of this, was to show up to a spot the parade would pass (near the start of the parade) at the time it was due to start. There were other people there and the roads had just closed, so all was looking good. I took a seat on the kerb, thinking I would have prime position for a stream of wonderful floats and vehicles and other things on wheels. As I sat, the street filled with people - some in outlandish costumes (brilliant), some in what I think was just their every day clothes (still brilliant) - moving in both directions. It looked like they were all walking towards where the parade was due to start. Then I began to wonder why the street wasn't barricaded to protect the parade performers. If this was Sydney, the road would have been closed two weeks ago and people would have been claiming their parade-side spots two weeks ago too. But no, everyone seemed happy enough just to show up after the official start time (I checked Madrid's gay website. The source of all wisdom) as long as they had some kind of rainbow flag and a beverage. And then hey, where was everyone getting this sangria from? The Sydney-sider in me didn't want to get up and lose my spot, but I was also only getting a little bit of the action where I was. I sat for about half an hour and decided I should go and find the parade, as it didn't seem to be parading towards me anytime soon. I dodged drag queens in impossible shoes and men in Speedos and made my way to the very crowded start of the parade. But still no parade. It gets to 7 and I decide that the 38 degrees celsius might be a bit much to ask a straight person to wait out for a gay pride parade, so decide to head back to the hostel and admit defeat. Just as I make this decision, I hear Latino beats being beat out on drums, and decide this must be the parade starting. But how will they push through everyone just pissing about in the streets? This is why I entrust barricades! These kinds of things need crowd control! But no, somehow the band pushes through, and just as I'm watching them pass, I notice a wave of colour tearing towards me. The biggest and proudest rainbow flag you ever did see was trying to swallow me (and a lot of others, but this blog is about me, so who cares about them) whole. I managed to escape its clutch just in time and was able to watch on as others panic-fled from the flag that seemed to have its own momentum. The giant flag was followed by a bus with some kids on it, and not much else. Really, it was a terrible effort for a "parade", and I expected more from Madrid. They had the pride and the atmosphere levels, but I demand floats! And I did not see one single dyke on a bike. From all my experience of gay pride parades (I've seen three now, so clearly I am the expert) I have to say Sydney does it best, and I don't even care how biased that sounds. You can't argue with Kylie Minogue. For some reason I booked myself a 7.30AM flight for Seville in the morning. So it might be a good thing that I've bowed out of the gay festivities really early so I don't arrive there completely dead. From my weather stalking, Seville is even hotter than Madrid, getting above 40 degrees most days this past week. That said, Madrid hasn't been unbearable heat wise. There's no humidity so it's actually quite pleasant. Anyway, I'll leave this here because two lengthy blog posts in one day might make you all expect me to keep this up, and I intend on going to watch 'los borrachos' up the road a bit more. I may even become one of them, they seem quite happy, even if they do stink and get told off by waiters on the daily.
Tapas and Remembering Hostels
When I left you last, I was about to go for tapas. Boy were these tapas wonderful. It was for one of Kayleigh's mate's birthdays, and I sat back and let the seasoned expats do the ordering while sipping my sangria. And they made some good choices. I immediately regretted wolfing down the baked camembert coated in nuts on a stick first up, as it turned out this was my favourite, and I would never see it again that night. But the other shared plates were delightful - prawns on a stick, little battered and fried fish, stuffed peppers, shredded potatoes. I later learnt that the restaurant ('La Flauta') is reputed as being the best tapas in Barcelona. So I've done well for myself. On my last full day in Barcelona I met up with Laura, another from the Thailand gang, and we went to Montjuic - a park accessed either by a looooong walk or a cable car (10 points to guess which option we chose) which has a castle up the top with great views over Barcelona. We waited for the smog to clear a bit and tried not to look at the couples who had gone up to the castle with the sole purpose of eating each other's faces. After unintentionally being perverts, we made our way to Placa Real to catch some of Kayleigh's street performance. Her and a friend are currently doing performances to advertise this thing called 'Eat With Me', where locals cook dinner for a group of strangers. Kind of like 'airbnb' but for food. You sign up, someone from the company comes to assess your meal and work out a price to charge your guests, you pick a night you can do it, it goes on the website and people say if they want to come. I love the idea, and might try and find one to go to one in another city. So Laura & I found ourselves at the end of this spiel, with Kayleigh's mate not realising we weren't just strangers in the square (despite having met me two days earlier), boy was her face red. The acting ladies had a bit more work to do, so Laura and I set off for another wander (where I kicked some dog shit while distracted by the sales in the shops and had to find a drinking fountain to wash my foot in, like a proper tramp) via the supermarket to buy lunchables to make back at Kayleigh's. We got to Kayleigh's and asked which number to buzz, Kayleigh came down to let us in but had absent mindedly left the keys in the flat. Oops. No-one was home to let us in, so we took the raw chicken we'd planned on eating to a pizza place around the corner. I think the chicken enjoyed the outing. We attempted to get back into Kayleigh's a few more times, but no luck. We did some more exploring until it was time for Kayleigh to go to rehearsals for another project, so I went back to Laura's flat to relax in the meantime. My last morning in Barcelona was a pretty cruisy one, involving a sleep in and a coffee outing with Kayleigh. I then made myself a pack horse again as Kayleigh escorted me to Placa Catalunya, where I could get a shuttle to the airport. I won't dwell on it as I said this in the last blog, but I did really love Barcelona. It just had a good feeling, and it is beautiful. It's going on my 'places to return to' list. I flew into Madrid and surprisingly didn't melt in the 38 degrees. I decided to get the metro to my hostel, as their website had taken the time to so kindly and simply explain to me how to do so. It was rammed, and if you thought train surfing on your own was tricky, try doing it with about 20 extra kilos strapped onto your person. I got off to transfer, and learnt the line that I needed was actually under maintenance for the whole of summer, so found a taxi to take me to the hostel instead. I arrived and had the realisation that the next portion of my trip I'll be playing the solo traveller game again. I'd almost forgotten how to play it. Everyone else in the common areas have come in groups that don't look too bothered in extended their attentions, plus the ones with Australian accents just seem really annoying. I notice that there's a tapas night planned for the evening, so think that I'll tag along to that - more so I could have people to eat with than anything else. I waited it out in the lobby as the group grew, and was then shepherded by a pocket rocket Spanish girl all through the streets of Madrid in about a group of 40. I was beginning to doubt my choice of staying in hostels, as it's not much fun walking through crowded streets with other people, let alone 40 of them, but, the alternative is to stay in a hotel, alone, that doesn't have any common area or activities like this, so I'd be going out for paella for one every night, which might get a bit sad after a while. Don't get me wrong, I'm fantastic company for myself, I really get along with me well, but I'm always telling myself the same stories that I must forget I was there for in the first place. I don't want to get bored of myself. We got taken to a place that we were told was a very "typical" tapas place for Madrid, and were continuously told that it was a place the locals went to, not many tourists know about it. I found that a little bit rich, when you looked around the room and there were about 100 of us foreigners, but the atmosphere was good and it was all you can eat for 10 Euro, and I had company for dinner, so I wasn't complaining. I joined a table with a Brazilian couple (named Rafael and Rafaela, would you believe), some Frenchies and a French Canadian. The waiters kept throwing food at us, and every dish involved bread. Sliced pork belly on bread, sliced chorizo on bread, potato tart on bread (this one was hard to get through), and it all just kept landing on our table quicker than we could devour it. We also got a cup of the local sangria - which I guess is just sangria but with lemonade in it to make it bubbly, but it was refreshing. The hostel was organising a pub crawl after the tapas night, and we were all debating whether or not to go. The French guys and French Canadian decided it wasn't their "scene", so left the tapas place after they couldn't intake any more carbohydrates, leaving me with Rafael & Rafaela to weigh up our options. I didn't really fancy being shepherded around Madrid in a large group, nor did I really want to pay 12 Euro to get a free shot that I didn't really want in the first place. Rafaela had heard of a great club that she wanted to go to, but thought maybe we could have some drinks at the hostel first. This plan worked perfectly for me, as it still allowed me to be social, it also helped me get back to the hostel (as I didn't have a map and wasn't paying much attention when we left so wasn't confident I could get myself back) and also gave me the option of what I truly wanted to do - be a nana and go to bed. So the three of us walked through the crowded streets of Madrid, which is in the middle of gay pride week, and I'm almost confident we were in the gay centre of the city (the amount of sex shops and gyms gave it away), but I was surprised to walk past as many female prostitutes as we did. I can't know for sure if they were prostitutes, but there were an awful lot of women with no pants on loitering next to street lamps saying things to men as they walked by. Maybe they just needed to know the time. After dodging bulked up men in athletic gear and sad looking hookers, we got to the hostel for some beer and banter. We learnt that the gay pride parade would be the following evening, so made plans to go. I trust Spain to throw a wonderful parade, and so help me if I don't get glitter confetti on me then I may as well cancel the rest of my Eurotrip. Rafael & Rafaela were making their desire to head out known, and I gracefully said I was so tired and weary from my travels that I think I wanted to go to bed. I don't think they were too bothered, and I regretted putting so much effort into my apologetic goodbye. I then realised that it was 1 in the morning, so I really shouldn't be that sorry about going to bed, and simultaneously realised that I may have aged a bit since the last time I was in hostels. Good thing I'm a heavy sleeper and didn't even notice when everyone else in my dorm came back to sleep. This morning I've had breakfast at the hostel because it's free, and it consists of coffee and churros. All I can think is that I need to eat a fucking salad. Why isn't anyone's national dish a plate of broccoli? I could really get into that. I only have today in Madrid, as I leave quite early tomorrow morning for Seville. So I think I'll tag along on the free walking tour the hostel is running, have a solo explore in the afternoon before I go see some more men in Speedos and glitter. And maybe today I will buy a salad, because I'm just 'loca' like that.