Sad Beautiful Tragic || Christine & Jessika
As ironic as it seemed, although Jessika was labeled ‘popular’, with a bunch of people wanting to be where she was, she had little friends. It was mainly because she almost never let people in, afraid of being hurt, having her heart ripped once she allowed people to see her weak side, her sweet side. But it was there, just quietly hiding, and only came out when she was around those she truly cared for, which contained only a few. And Christine was one of them. The connection between them seemed incomprehensible to Jessika, the way they clicked immediately, and somehow, she didn’t find Chris’s innocence and caring nature stupid like she normally would, instead, she found it adoring, the way that Chris seemed so pure at heart, like Jess once was, but she was never getting back. Her gaze set on the blonde sitting next to her, her hand still stuffing in her pockets, she observed Chris with carefulness. She thought she saw confusion, sadness and uncertainty in those pretty blue eyes, and Jessika knew, she knew that she was lying, no, not lying, just not telling her the whole truth. She decided to start easy at first, “You sure about it?” she asked, her voice doubtful and questioning, her eyebrow arching. She knew Chris was close to her family, unlike Jess, but somehow, she sensed that there’s way more than that that’s bothering her friend. “Does it have anything to do with.. Marissa?” she couldn’t stop herself from asking, and sighed afterward, “Tell me if there’s anything I can do to make you feel better, okay?” It was definitely unusual, for Jess to care about people, it was always just Marissa, but things had changed.
“Everything’s fine.” she reassured Christine, with a small smile on her face that she hoped was convincing. Cause, she didn’t know. She didn’t know if she was okay, hell, she never did. It had always been a big swirl of confusion to her. Life. The way she acted, the way she felt, sometimes, she knew that something was seriously wrong with her, yet she didn’t know what changes could be made. Being someone as mean and defensive helped her, it helped her with hiding who she truly was on the inside, lost and damaged. “Yes, it seems to be, a lot of drama happened lately.” she commented, and since it was too much to talk about, she decided to skip it, unless Chris asked her to tell. A soft chuckle escaped her lips as she heard Chris’ words, “Yeah, you’re right, I say mean things to literally everyone.” she mocked, knowing that it was the utter truth, it was just her way of being, she knew it was wrong, yet she never planned on changing. “We just had this fight, it’s petty.” she said, shrugging, she wasn’t the one who got hurt, anyway. She was over the gossips that slightly got into her by now, of course, she would never admit to herself that it ever got into her at the first place. “Meeting with my parents always sucks, and it brings my mood down.” she spoke truthfully, she only mentioned it to her best friend, and now, Chris was one of her best friends.
Christine glanced at Jessika carefully, knowing perfectly well what it meant to hide something from everyone. She kept her darkest secret even from herself at times, in denial about the fact that something was seriously wrong with her and beyond her control at times. The only way to quell the sickness inside her mind was dose herself up with medication and act like everything was fine and dandy, it made her sick thinking about the fact she could help everyone but not herself. She supposed it was a little ironic, she was the girl who always offered advice, even when it wasn’t needed, yet she couldn’t stop the constant crisscross that was her mind. She shook her head and glanced at Jessika once more, casually shrugging her shoulders. “I’m positive.” She replied quietly, she wanted desperately to tell Jessika what was wrong with her, but she didn’t want the girl to treat her differently, like some vicious pariah that needed to be protected and treated under a constant microscope. Her heart lurched at the mention of Marissa; she wondered what Marissa had told Jessika. “What about her?” She asked quietly, taking another sip from the vodka. “I mean, the fact she hasn’t talked to me hurts. I thought we were closer than that.” She confessed, not wanting to dwell on the topic of the dark haired girl for too long. “But I guess I was mistaken.” She quickly added. She wished she had mom here right now, she would say something comforting and that would be the end of it, it wouldn’t need to be brought up again, not until Chris deemed it necessary. “I’ll be fine. I’m a lot tougher than I look.” Christine confirmed, offering the girl a small smile. Hoping that the tone in her voice was a lot more confident than she felt at the moment. Now it was her turn to be doubtful about what her friend was telling her. She had heard the fine statement’s so many times, she wondered if anyone ever truly meant it. Was anyone ever really fine? She was honestly beginning to doubt they were, everyone seemed just as messed up as she was, devoid of the mental disorder and everything. She knew that Jessika acted tough, but there was a clear kindness in her somewhere, she had shown Christine it, and that made her worried for her friend. That maybe all the drama was finally wearing her down. She bit her lip. “Well, she seems really hurt. She asked me for you to leave her alone. Do me a favour and do it please?” She asked quietly, dreading the girls answer. “It upsets me when I see my friends fighting with someone.” She admitted her first truth of the night. Fighting always upset her, especially when it involved her friends. She bit her lip and looked around. She frowned at Jessika’s confession. “I guess it would be awkward for those who aren’t close to their parents,” she stated quietly, she knew what it felt to hide something from her parents and it hurt, but seeing them never bought her mood down, it made her feel better usually. “But if you ever need to talk about it, I’m here.” She stated, reaching out and squeezing her friends hand comfortingly.
