pony boy.

cool kids said i'll never fall in love, but i might, though.

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

“come on, i didn’t do that.” solomon shook his head, a wry smile on his face as he looked at sawyer. again, he still couldn’t believe how important he was to sawyer, that he could matter that much to anyone at all. it scared him, and it was even worse knowing he would only let sawyer down in the end. he leaned against the wall then, like he couldn’t support his own weight any longer, like it was all a burden too heavy to bear. for a second, silence hung in the air, and solomon scuffed his toe against the floor. not looking at sawyer, he said, “you think too much of me.”

“and you don’t give yourself enough credit,” sawyer rebutted, watching solomon’s every move, though he was trying to play cool. every word of this conversation set his nerves alight, but he needed to come off as casually as he could. the worst thing he could do was make it even more evident that, no matter what, he cared about whatever this was between them more than solomon did. “i like you and i like kissing you and hanging out with you,” he said with a shrug, “you...make me happy right now, and right now is all that really matters.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

it all came out wrong…or did it come out right, and what he felt was wrong? all solomon knew was that sawyer’s defeated expression made his stomach sink, and he had never hated his own skin more. “i want you too,” he said. the words were soft, and they escaped from his mouth before he even realized it, but he meant it. “i’m not going to resent you. i’m just afraid you’re going to hate me when it turns out i’m just destined to be a piece of shit forever.” he inhaled a long breath and chewed the inside of his lip. “and i don’t want you to hate me.”

“i really don’t think you could do anything to make me hate you,” sawyer replied automatically. it killed him to know that solomon felt so lowly about himself, and all he wanted to do was reach out and pull him into the tightest of hugs, but he wasn’t sure he had the guts to do that just yet. “you made this place feel like home for me. nothing could ever undo that.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

will they… 🍌 francesca & oliver.

“we’ll see about that one,” oliver scoffed. he was more of a 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner guy than a nail polish guy. he ogled all the bottles francesca owned; it was hard to believe she owned that many. “damn, you weren’t kidding when you say you have every color. just surprise me.” there were too many to choose from, and honestly? he still didn’t want to do this.

“hot pink it is,” francesca teased, but scanned through her polishes with a thoughtful look. she was taking everything about oli in; his personality, his skin tone, the vibe he gave off. she always took this stuff seriously, and she wanted to make her boy look good. finally deciding, she picked up a dark, almost black, type of blue, holding it up to his face. “this’ll go nicely with your eyes, i think.”

[cyberpunkes]

dove cameron: ok

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

solomon inhaled, and the breath caught in his chest, a bubble begging to pop, but he couldn’t let it out. he held it in with the tension in his jaw and shoulders because it was easier than putting what he felt into words. he’d already bared his soul, at least it felt like it to him, and he didn’t know what else he could say to sawyer. he wanted to feel relieved that sawyer assured him he didn’t need him to be his boyfriend (a word that made his heartrate spike), but he couldn’t because something still felt wrong. something between them still didn’t quite add up.

“i don’t know, man. i can’t tell you what this is. i’ve never done this before.” actually, he had done this before. he fooled around with countless people and made no promises; promising sawyer that he wanted something in the future, however uncertain he was about what and when, was already the biggest step he’d taken in years. “i just want to spend time with you, but the pressure is, like…a lot sometimes. not just from you. from like. everyone. and myself. i don’t know. this doesn’t even make any sense. i just feel like i’m going to let you down. like i’m never going to be able to be who you want.” his chest ached when he admitted it.

sawyer watched solomon as he spoke, his hope dwindling with each second that passed. whatever was happening between them wasn’t anything more than a friendship with a little something extra, and the quicker sawyer accepted that, the quicker he could stop himself hurting. his feelings weren’t solomon’s responsibility. “you’re already who i want,” he admitted, his voice as weak as he felt, “but i get it, and i don’t want you to, like, resent me for pressuring you or anything like that. i can...back off a bit, i guess. we don’t have to keep...doing what we’ve been doing if that’ll make this easier on you.” he was rambling now, but he didn’t know what solomon wanted to hear anymore. 

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

covered in your color 🍏 salmon.

solomon shook his head at sawyer’s words. “are you kidding me? you’re the only person i could ever want. i am so in love with you, sawyer, no matter what fucking color you see,” he said, then squished his cheeks a little bit. “okay?” solomon asked, trying to gauge sawyer’s reaction. he knew it might not be enough to convince sawyer now, but he really couldn’t see himself with anyone but him.

sawyer felt his cheeks heat as he looked into solomon’s eyes, soaking his words in. sure, the world might not view them as soulmates in the way they’d always known it, but this boy was the only person sawyer ever wanted to be with. that had to count for something. “okay,” he said, turning his head to press a kiss to the palm that squished his cheek, “i’m, like, super in love with you, too.”

[bruisedcamo]

sawyerphoenix just posted to instagram!

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

on top of the world 🍌 oliver & sawyer.

oliver tended to keep weird hours, especially this summer when his only obligation was his gig at the creamery and he never accepted a shift that started before noon. he often ran late at night and never ran into anyone, but he didn’t mind a little company. “you took the words right out of my mouth,” oliver chuckled, his breath returning as he slowed his stride on the last few yards up the hill. “sawyer, right?”

“yeah, that’s right,” sawyer said, his breathing starting to ease now that he was standing still. he could still feel his heart beating through his chest, but he supposed the anxiety of running into someone so late at night would do that to anyone. “nice to meet you, even if it is kinda a little weird,” he laughed, “but i don’t think i caught your name?”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

to noise making 🥥 summer & eddy.

as soon as she heard someone join them, summer stopped mid-note to see who it was. realizing it was eddy, she let out a small laugh. “i’d be pretty impressed if she did. and a little disappointed. i’m really gunning for ‘mama’ to be her first word, even if that milestone isn’t supposed to come for a while.” she glanced at giselle with a fond smile on her face, then looked back to eddy. “what about you? are you here with sofia or just trying to get your shot at the swings?”

“trust me, it’ll come around much quicker than you think it will,” eddy said with a small laugh, looking ahead at sofia playing with some other cape kids in the distance. he still couldn’t believe his little girl was basically a small human now, let alone the fact that she could speak entire sentences. “sof’s already got an attitude and she’s only a few months off five. i don’t even want to think about what fifteen’s going to look like,” he chuckled, “but, yeah, she’s here with me, taking over the playground over there and making herself queen.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

getting there can be half the fun 🍑 eleanor + zara.

eleanor’s jaw dropped when zara revealed the truth about their last assignment. “no way,” she said, her voice at a conspiratorial whisper, and the cookies she’d been comparing completely forgotten in her hands. “i don’t want to make fun of her or anything, i just always thought she was so smart. and honestly, i was kind of jealous because of that.” among other reasons.

“well, now you know that you have absolutely nothing to be jealous of,” zara said with a laugh, picking up the bag of chocolate chip cookies eleanor had been holding and dumping in their shopping basket. “the whole thing is quite literally an act.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

let me come home 🍓 indara.

cara did notice the scattered art supplies as soon as they walked through the door, but she could hardly care about them right now. “are you kidding me? i get to live with my best friend in the world in my favorite place in the world. i wouldn’t care if there was a hole in the the floor…but i’m glad there isn’t because mr. turner is already super annoying about the noise we make.” cara scooped indy into another hug before she flopped onto the couch, casting her duffle bag aside for now. “it’s so good to be back. l.a. was cool, but honestly it was kind of exhausting.”

“ugh, he’s been super annoying lately. i’m starting to think he just doesn’t like me in particular,” indy said with a roll of her eyes, but she couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face. she was certain nothing could right now, not when her very best friend in the world was back in the little space they’d created together. she wouldn’t admit it out loud, but sometimes, when cara was gone, she’d still come home and call out for her before remembering that she’d been living alone. “well, you’ve got all the time in the world to tell me all about it now,” she said then, flopping onto the couch alongside cara, “don’t tell me you got hooked on, like, kale smoothies and shit. i might have to reconsider the offer to move back in if you’ve packed a fancy blender in that suitcase.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

will they… 🍌 francesca & oliver.

oliver tensed when francesca drew near him to steal her comforter back, but he couldn’t stay on his guard for long. sure, francesca scared the shit out of him sometimes, but he liked to think they were close enough that she wouldn’t ruin his life. “manicure only. i’m not gonna let that be the gateway paint job,” he said in a warning tone, but he’d already scooted closer to her. “what colors do you have? and tell me you have nail polish remover for after.”

francesca rolled her eyes at oli’s dramatics as she walked over to her dresser, picking up the box of nail polishes she kept beneath the desk. in all honesty, she didn’t need this many bottles of the stuff, but buying them gave her a quick boost of happiness, and she needed to have colours for whatever mood she was in. it was a wise financial decision, really. “i’ve got any colour you want,” she said, sitting back on the bed, the box settled between them, “and i’m gonna do such a good job, you won’t wanna remove it.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

covered in your color 🍏 salmon.

the faintness of sawyer’s voice caught solomon’s attention right away. try as he might, sawyer couldn’t hide the hurt behind it. “it can be. the softer shades are pretty. i can’t think of anything like that right now. but it can be really bright too. like the sun. and flowers,” solomon explained absentmindedly. he focused on sitting up, so he could look sawyer in the eye, cupping his face in his hands as he did. “hey. don’t let the colors make you worry about us.”

“it sounds nice,” sawyer said softly, watching solomon’s face above him as the other boy sat up. he didn’t know what this meant for them or their future, but right now, he could focus on the fact that the only place he ever wanted to be was right in solomon’s arms. “i’m just...” he started then, swallowing whatever emotion that was bubbling in his throat, “i guess i’m just worried about what other people will think, or that you’ll eventually meet someone who can see all of those beautiful shades with you.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

solomon’s anxiety ran wild as he stood pressed against the wall, like he wanted to sink into it. his skin had never crawled like it did it in this moment. every inch of it itched with something frantic and desperate. today would be the day sawyer didn’t forgive him. 

“they’re both real? it’s like this. i want to figure this out,” he started to speak slowly, so he didn’t trip over his words, but they began to spill out faster and faster. “but it’s new to me, and scary, and i feel like there’s all this pressure, so i get in my head, and then i panic, and i do something stupid before i even realize i’m doing it, which i get is like totally fucked up for you, and you shouldn’t have to deal with that, which is why i didn’t want you to have to deal with me in the first place.”

“i don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want,” sawyer said, his brow furrowing slightly. the very last thing he wanted to do was come off as manipulative, or to force solomon into a relationship he wasn’t ready for, even if the thought of being nothing at all was slowly eating him up from the inside. maybe he needed to ease off a little, he didn’t know. all of this was new to him, too. “i don’t need you to, like...be my boyfriend or whatever right now,” he said, mumbling the b-word soft, “i just feel like i need some sort of clarity on what this is and what this isn’t so i know how far to, like, detach myself or something. i don’t know. all of this is scary to me, too.” he didn’t know if he was saying the right things, but he needed to get all of this off his chest, even if he wasn’t quite sure he was making sense.

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

solomon knew he was fucking this up. his time with sawyer was a roller coaster, always up then crashing down. the only consistency was solomon’s constant fear that any moment would be the one when he ruined things beyond repair. he wanted to do this with sawyer, whatever ‘this’ was, and test the waters of ‘something more’, but the constant anxiety that underscored it all only made solomon more reckless and stupid.

“you’re more than that to me. i meant that when i said it at the halloween party,” solomon explained quickly. he knew that much at least. but the pause that followed was tedious. he didn’t know anything else.

“but it’s like this. i like this. i like hanging out with you. i want to be more than friends, but i feel like i can’t be what you want me to be right now. it’s just confusing, and i feel like i’m always fucking up, and we aren’t even…”

sawyer wanted to believe the words solomon said, but everything about them told him not to. there’d never been a constant in whatever this relationship was — the only thing sawyer felt like he could rely on was the fact that, no matter what, his feelings would always be so much deeper than solomon’s. he felt like he was going crazy most of the time; chasing his own tail and some fantasy that wouldn’t ever come true. “that’s exactly what’s bugging me, though,” he said, voice still soft and timid, though he managed to look solomon in the eye, “you say one thing and then act a totally different way. i never know which one is more real.” 

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

guilt punched solomon’s gut when sawyer spoke. his expression immediately sobered, and he fidgeted, hand rubbing the back of his neck. “i know. i’m sorry.” some of his worry dissipated, at least, when sawyer said he missed him too. “yeah, i did. um, you’re, like, one of my best friends.” the might not have been the confession sawyer wanted to hear, but as simple as it sounded, to solomon it meant more. he rarely felt so close to someone so quickly, even in a friendly capacity.

every word solomon spoke broke sawyer’s heart just a little bit more, even if they were meant to be reassuring. he wanted to be more than just best friends, more than just the person solomon turned to when he felt like making out with someone. he didn’t know how to mean more to this boy. he’d just about tried everything he could think of. “yeah, you’re one of mine, too,” sawyer said, sitting on the edge of the couch as if to stabilise himself somehow, “i don’t know how to stop thinking about you as more than that.”

[bruisedcamo]

pwrslide​:

this is not my last masterpiece 🍏 salmon.

before he could stop it, a chuckle slipped from solomon’s mouth. it was the most inopportune time, but it tumbled out with his exhale on its own accord. “sorry. it was just the way you said it,” he tried to explain. he dared to look up from the floor then, meeting sawyer’s eye with a sheepish look. “i haven’t been doing too hot either. um, i missed you.” maybe he should have said that either.

“it hasn’t felt funny,” sawyer deadpanned, too drained of every emotion to come up with anything better. over the last couple of days, he’d felt sad, angry, anxious, defeated. like he was mourning the loss of a relationship he never really had. now, he was just tired. he looked up at solomon then, an ounce of courage coming back to him, though he wasn’t sure what to do with it anymore. “really?” he asked then, sounding more insecure than he would have liked, “i missed you, too.”