Thoughts Of A Bruised Whore

Random worthless ramblings .29 forever. I like when my outsides match my insides, bruised & broken

[mxxnlightsblog]

It's crazy how trauma makes you push people away when all you want is love.

[traumatizeddfox]

“but it wasn’t that bad”

did it hurt? did you feel scared? unsafe? were you embarrassed? humiliated? terrified? did you feel confused on why? does it keep you up at night? do you avoid being in a similar situation? did you cry? did you want to cry? who told you it wasn’t that bad?

[bruisedramblings]

the thought that they can change for someone else is killing me

[feelingsoftheday]

you deserve someone who’s gonna treat you like you matter everyday. not just when it’s convenient for them

[bruisedramblings]

I didn’t feel safe

So I stopped talking

I didn’t feel safe

so I changed the way I dressed

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped spending money

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped talking to the ones you didn’t like

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped seeing the people I loved

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped leaving the house

I didn’t feel safe

so I told them how in love with you I was

I didn’t feel safe

so I smiled

I didn’t feel safe

so I tried to take up less space

I didn’t feel safe

so I told my brain to only keep the good things

I didn’t feel safe

so I always said yes

I didn’t feel safe

so I defended you

I didn’t feel safe

so I let you decide

I didn’t feel safe

So I didn’t argue

I didn’t feel safe

so I always said I’m sorry

I didn’t feel safe

so I cried alone

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped living

I didn’t feel safe

so I stopped breathing

[emotionalwords]

I pretend it doesn't bother me but it's tearing me apart.

[oxazepams]

no matter how many times i hear “i love you”, “i’m not going to abandon you”, “i’m not going anywhere” i’m still so fucking scared of being abandoned

[bruisedramblings]

There really is nothing quite like feeling loved and seen.

[puredrip-deactivated20220320]

Put a secret in my ask box.

[stay-close]

“I crave time by myself to sit and heal my heart before I step out into the world again.”

— Gemman Troy

[bruisedramblings]

I’m so tired…but like in my soul

[emotionalwords]

[emotionalwords]

[ptimepoet]

[missinyouiskillingme]

This

[bruisedramblings]

Can someone teach me how to make decisions? Please and thank you.

[bruisedramblings]

But did I make it all up? Was everything real? How can we truly know when everyone’s experience is different?

[bruisedramblings]

the overwhelming urge to just shut down when someone loves me