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diary entry #1 🧸🍯

hello everyone 🤍 I don’t know if anyone even still cares about this blog but I wanted to make a more vocal post again after so long. I wanted to update on here & say that I’m still in the same familial & financial situation I was in 3-4 years ago… not a lot as changed at all, rather I feel like I made a lot of mistakes that I regret. often I think to myself "why didn’t I do 'x' sooner?" or "why didn’t I put enough effort into 'x'?". I don’t think I really changed as a person much either, I became a more softer & kinder person - definitely, but I also feel like I became a more aggressive, sad, hurt and most importantly scared person… I don’t know what the future holds and often I wake up and wonder if what I’m doing is the right thing or if I’m on the right path in my life. recently I’ve been trying again to think of how I want my future life to look like, but in the last few years I didn’t feel like myself anymore and I feel lost… I feel like something from my innocence, curiosity and my imagination has been stolen away from me. I desperately want to go back to how I used to be 3 years ago. I was at one of my lowest but at least I was still myself and I always had hope & dreams left for the future. I’m planning on keeping a diary on here in hopes to find my old & true self once again. It’s going to hopefully rain soon and I have to go eat dinner so I will go for now. I will post again soon 💌