Thomas: How tall are you?
Liv: Height is a social construct.
Jacob: So, you're short.
$LAYYYTER
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@burkesincorrectquotes
Thomas: How tall are you?
Liv: Height is a social construct.
Jacob: So, you're short.
Thomas: I give up. I am so tired.
Xavier: Get the emergency supply!
Lars: *carries Liv and places her in front of Thomas*
Liv: *smiles*
Thomas: AND I AM BACK BABY, LET’S GOOO!
Kai: Name one time I haven’t acted professional.
Xavier: You’re holding a juice box right now
Kai: It’s to stop me from spilling my juice!
Lars: We need to distract these guys.
Kai: Leave it to me.
Kai: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.
Thomas & Jacob: *immediately begin arguing*
Xavier: Do you want to play 20 Questions?
Thomas: Sure!
Xavier: Whats your favorite color?
Thomas, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you like men?
Kai: Jacob isn’t answering his phone.
Thomas: I’ll call.
Xavier: Kai and I have both tried six times each, what makes you think--
Jacob, over the phone: Hello?
Liv: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it.
Liv: And I started thinking.
Liv: Like, it was just trying to get food.
Liv: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck?
Thomas: Are you ok?
Jacob: Thomas annoyed me today so I told him that I can’t wait to see what he has planned for our special day tomorrow.
Liv: There is nothing special about tomorrow.
Jacob: But there is something special about watching the color leave his face as panic takes over.
Xavier: Yo dumbass, get over here.
Kai: Okay-
Thomas, gleefully runs past: I’m coming!
Kai, sadly: I thought... I was dumbass...
Lars: It’s dark in here.
Kai: Don’t worry dude I got this.
Kai: *stomps his feet*
Kai: *skechers light up*
Liv: I’m going to hell.
Jacob: Probably.
Liv: I'll pick you up?
Jacob, nodding: Carpool.
Thomas: How are we supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Kai without him noticing?
Xavier: Hey, Kai, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny.
Kai, takes and swallows tracker: Pay up, loser.
Thomas:
Jacob: I prevented a murder today.
Thomas: Really? How’d you do that?
Jacob: Self control.
Jacob, addressing the gang: And if you have any suggestions feel free to put them in the suggestion box.
Xavier: But – that’s just a trash can.
Jacob: It sure is!
Jacob: I could kill you if I wanted to, Liv.
Liv: Yeah? So could another human being.
Jacob:
Liv: So could a dog.
Jacob:
Liv: So could a dedicated duck.
Jacob:
Liv: You aren't special, Jacob.
Jacob: You're man doesn't have the strength to caramelize onions.
Xavier: You’re man thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions.
Kai: Who's fucking caramalizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten apples exist?
Liv: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions?
Thomas: So what’s the plan?
Lars: I don’t know. You’re smart, *points at Jacob* he's mean and *points at Xavier* he's rich, come up with something.