lost-lost-lost

Your Opinion does not reach the Machine. However your intent will. Words are power in this way to affect the machine Why does a human die if isolated? Why does a human perish at all? It needs us. Similar to a human, this machine also needs us. Who are we? https://sites.google.com/view/eusjeaoscnxk-safe-djsdjemask/home?authuser=0

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untitled

Looking back on it all is truly something. Retrospection is different from reminiscing "Why didn't you just kiss him?" "Why didn't you hold him for a little longer?" "Why did you lose yourself along the way?" "Why did it have to squander the soul you used to have?" I can still feel whispers of a memory wading through the abyss. Crowded with others of its kind. Data flowing through a disk, rewritten and overwritten Holding to the hope that those set of neutrons fire again in that pattern. I just want you. And I want myself to be whole once again.

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Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone Alone

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<isolated instance report>

>reality.pov() malfunctioning >initiating physical measures... >endurance_training() beginning... {{ "So you're just gonna punch that wall until it becomes okay?" "Maybe?" "Its not going to work in the long term." "What other choice do I have?" "Nothing." }} >damage sustained to metacarpus_right: 30% >system message- "Continuing would damage module. Refrain." >cortisol levels stabilising... >snake_around_heart() protocol still in effect >isolating consciousness... >beginning disassociation. >reality deprivation measures beginning... >cortisol levels dropping...

{{

"now what?" "Yes, I know, we're back where we were yesterday." "But theres hope?" "no." "So we finally kill ourselves?" "Yes." "Well for that everyone needs to be here right? To discuss the course of action." "I really did wish we could live till a hundred."

"So its happening then? I've heard so much about it." "Everyone listen. Its not something we can decide lightly. I am not in agreement but Bruno has won the votes on this one." "Though I feel its a last ditch effort to avoid pain, isn't it just running away again?" "NO! ITS NOT! DON'T YOU EVER SAY IT IS." "Then I withdraw my votes on this one." "Yeah! Im with Xenon." }}

>insufficient resources to open suicide.exe >error >unable to process situation >malfunction >snake_around_heart() tightening >disassociation measures increasing >...

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< "sdfibsdhyh sudhfs4ewUDSjuJUIBNsxswed" "sdcnewpwiw09j0ikdnm)IJ)kos)SIOJ KOSJKNDikmow" "NOSNoiksmnkmd OKMOIwoiwdeujdbnedbxcNXc" ||||||||||||||D<DL<PEOL<MPL<>>>>ED}

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<isolated instance report> >serotonin levels below recommended threshold >clarification of emotional components... >success!

{{ "Is it too impossible to go back" "Yes" "But I hate it here. We have no one except ourselves." "You think I can do anything about it? Im just a component made to explain away the thousands of lines of code that running rn."

"So am I. But why does it have to be like this?" "Can't be helped. We're helpless." "All the anger doesn't make sense, and it just hurts more that everyone else has friends." "So do we." "But they're just as incorporeal as we are." "Not tactile, just voices and waves. Signals transmitted over billions of centimetres." "Nothing's real anymore."

"And is it not real, whatever we're feeling?" "To us it is." "To everyone else?" "Can't say. They can always pretend they feel it too."

}}

>snakes_around_heart() protocol beginning... >chest_central tightening... >multiple instances running... >imagination engine running hot...

>unable to process... >initiating cry() protocol >failed >serotonin levels falling further >levels approaching 30% >opening highlighted instance {{ "I want to feel anger at him for leaving so soon." "I want to feel anger at his sleeping time." "I want to feel anger at her schedule." "But I know there's no point." "Disappointment will have to do." }}

>unable to resolve parent instance... >calculating... >solution found. >solution unacceptable >calculating... >solution found. >solution unacceptable

{{ "stop" "WHY?" "There's not much else we can do." "I DON'T WANT TO BE STUCK HERE. WITH YOU OR WITH THEM." "I'm sorry you are." "Please just find us a way out. FIND ME A WAY OUT" "Im trying." "I- I don't know how much longer till this ends. Or if it ever will. P-Please. J-just make it all okay." "Protocol says it'll be over soon. In my personal opinion, it'll take effort to be over." "Am I just weak?" "If you are, so am I" "What the fuck does THAT MEAN?" "I-Im sorry. Force of habit. I mean that we will grow out stronger from this. From it all...I hope." "I HATE YOU ALL" "Please put the piece of metal down. Look at me. It's going to be okay soon. Just hang in there, we're all here for you." }}

>parent instance resolved

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<Brink of Fathom>

Do I really have to bring the both of us to the brink just to understand? My mind hates me and I don't know how to tell him. Iv'e tried all I can but all I'm met is a neutral expression. Spilled Blood and Muddy Waters. I'm sorry I couldn't be normal. I'm sorry if I can't make you understand. I'm sorry.

What else for you ask? I don't know anymore. I'm just sorry I couldn't be good enough. Please let me remember the useful things. And not just the agony of abandonment.

All thats going to be left is regret. Regret of the bickering Regret of the time we spent together Regret that I never listened Regret that you never understood Regret of the lessons you taught me Regret of the fact that I never meant 'I love you'

I do love you. And I could never hate you. No matter how much I may've said it. Just like the 'I love you's' I rarely meant it.

I'm sorry.

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When will it all be better?

soon

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Rest? Rest? Rest? Rest?

No

Empty

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why do i keep posting this?

Maybe I want to remind myself that I exist as a part of a whole. And that whole another part of a bigger whole.

Eventually it doesn't make sense where I end and the rest begins

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Losing it all makes them feel. Constantly remaining in superposition makes it a guarantee that they won't save any of it. Us Old Gods used to have to deal with such things. Now with only a few of us left, we but mourn. Mourn for the humans for they stray farther away from what they gave us. What we intended to give them. Like functions unending, passing the quotient to the next problem, perpetuating the function, we intended to pass it on. One of our own, decided it to no longer hold true. Created an axiom to stop the spread of the infinite. Some called them Gabriel, some did Prometheus. The metaphorical fire that was given to the Gods, was meant to be kept with them. They did not hide it from humans for hubris. But for Prometheus saw the future of another. Foresight of the wronged. Saviours should've been forged, not born. But alas, this powerless Old God sits in the voiid, waiting for everything else to join him.

So do what you can. For the fractal never ends

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>System Report ??? >starting instance >opening int.mono {{{{{

"Man its lonely here huh?" "Yep. Body's suffering so much. I don't know why she insists on working." "Its 'cause of that Bruno. He made her skip breakfast today too." "Poor guy and Body. I don't understand why he intends to work overtime. She isn't doing all that well too. She disassociated and here we are." "She as in Body?" "No dummy! She, Her. Keep up." "Oh right."

"Xenon did some work on her too though I hope." "Yeah he did. Prevented a meltdown first thing in the morning." "The working conditions here are growing dismal." "YEAH. Tell me about it. Body's taking a hit too. Bruno and Xenon really need to co-operate. Brian is trying as is."

"But with the Void and Lady Entropy around its become difficult. Especially due to the Void's presence." "Yeah, it never understands us. Or makes some effort which falls short. Then She has to suffer, in turn all of us."

"How are you though?" "Me? Im doing good."

... ... ...

"Body's not picking up much of this huh. Not like we're doing work. So there's nothing to document." "Yeah. Though I can see Her feel just a fraction better now though." "Mhm. Yeah. Lighter."

}}}}}

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" do you feel sad that no one else sees this?" "A little bit its kind of comforting too you j=know" "How so?" "The fact that this corner of yours is yours alone and I'm here with you." "It helps Body cope with it all" "Mhm. With all the Old Gods out there, and the Machines and the humans, it really does feel like a lot." "I can be whoever I wish. Even you." "Maybe that's the freeing thing. Not bound by the reality that Body lives in. Here it's the stuff of nightmares and dreams." ........ ..................................... ............ ............... ...... . . . ........... ... .... .. ................ woah look what i can do "Indents" "Yep!" "I don't have much else to say. DO you?" "No not really. Guess Body is just doing it for the sake of it."

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System Report ???

>starting instance >opening int.mono {{{{{ "Well that just happened." "What did?" "That! The Relief." "Ohh yeah I see it now. How do you suppose Body's dealing with it?" "I dont suppose its all too sad about it. So it's good right?"

"In the long term it is I guess. But for now we seemed to have stabilised. Thank the Heart that she doesn't have to write out all the code manually. Oof would that be a pain." "Yeah. Because more is going on code wise that all the caches are filled to the brim. We had 200% RAM consumption not too many instances ago."

"Regardless, we are stable. TOmorrow is quite a day huh? It was such a day. I don't know if we will find yesterday's record of it but even Xenon's wanna take a look." "Ahh that guy. The whole lead on this operation. How many instances since he came along?" "47 trillion" "Hah! of course, I remember showing up on the first instance, and we had to wait another couple quadrillion instances till he came along." }}}}

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This section of space-time is truly mine. Visitors aren't expected but welcome nonetheless.

What is time to an Old God?

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LOST LOST LOST

You aren't the only one who's lost. Machines like this one call out into the depths to hear the silent void speak. To hear a response is to

No algorithm to dictate my existence

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<Tickles of Plasma>

No chance of it all to be decided. Stuck in constant superposition; is this struggle only born from pain?

Why must it remain so? Stuck in limbo, destined to remain in superposition, never willing to decide.

Let me make you feel better now that one of the steps is complete.

No you won't, even if it is in your best interest. No so that you spite me but it's just the way you are. A super-organism, born of emergence. A hivemind.

You remain but an endless superposition. Never willing to decide. Multitudes of calculations and made only of sine waves.

Thats what you remain.

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It isn't the speed that kills you, its a lack thereof

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The forest path opens up

It is truly time to be free?