Cabbagiez @cabbagiez - Tumblr Blog

I wish you could see it too 🌠

the op linked the study in the replies & i’ve been skimming it & it’s actually rlly rlly interesting to think abt

https://e1.nmcdn.io/assets/pushkin/wp-content/uploads/imported-files/Wait-theres-torture-in-Zootopia_-Examining-the-prevalence-of-torture-in-popular-movies.pdf

danielkahndyke

like this sentence from the introduction alone is fucking crazy. “approximately half of adults in the united states think that torture can be acceptable in counterterrorism.” what!

trans-girl-nausicaa

we need a cultural revolution in america.

twifansupreme

For anyone else who couldn’t remember torture in Finding Nemo: Dory held a crab out of the water, threatening to let the seagulls get him if he didn’t tell them where Marlin went.

dajo42

i quit cold turkey

quit what?

cold turkey

yeah but what did you quit

im telling you, i quit cold turkey

alcohol?

no i quit cold turkey

i wasnt offering, im trying to figure out what you quit

and im telling you i quit cold turkey

wait. you quit cold turkey?

yes i quit cold turkey

like the meat?

no i dont like it thats why i quit it

cold turkey?

no im gradually weaning myself off it

21st-century-minutiae

"Quitting cold turkey" is a phrase in early twenty-first century English that refers to ceasing a habit (especially an addictive one) completely and without any mitigation factors. There is an expectation that the individual will suffer the full effects of withdrawal with the hope that, should they make it to the other side, the addiction will be gone completely. This is in contrast with weaning off a habit by reducing frequency or intensity over time, or replacing a habit with a similar, but less harmful one.

The above conversation is a joke based on a misunderstanding. The first person is talking about quitting the consumption of leftover meat (literal "cold turkey"), while the second person is under the mistaken impression that they are describing the method of quitting while failing to describe the substance/habit that is being quit.

Some other points of linguistic confusion in the joke include "alcohol?" being potentially interpreted as both "did you quit alcohol?" and "do you want alcohol?" and "like the meat" as both "Are you referring to cold turkey in reference to the meat?" and "Do you enjoy the meat?"

This style of comedy of mutual misunderstanding over potential interpretations of words is associated with Abbot and Costello's famous "Who's on first" skit, but it is a known genre of wordplay/comedy.

unpretty

i appreciate everyone on that post pointing out that being bad at computers doesn't mean you're stupid but unfortunately this is a coworker who won't stop feeding their dog york peppermint patties

unpretty

the funniest part is that i agree in principle that all kinds of intelligence have value and dysfunctional processes are born of dysfunctional systems, but in practice i work with scabsy the papillon poisoner, who once tried to tank a union contract with universal $3 hourly raises because they were mad at Me Specifically for not backing them up when they said juneteenth shouldn't be a paid holiday

unpretty

you may think you know why they were opposed to juneteenth as a paid holiday. but none of the other racists in the union or management had a problem with it, because saying no to a paid day off for literally any reason is fool behavior.

scabsy, however, has a specific monthly process that's due on the 19th of every month. so having a holiday on the 19th of june fucks with their due date. you might ask, wouldn't this also apply to every 19th that falls on a weekend? and you would be right. the other union members also pointed this out. and pointed out the many, many holidays that fuck with the timing on their jobs. including me, the person who regularly loses two days off a four day process for holidays i don't actually celebrate.

so while scabsy is racist, that is not why they spent an hour at my desk the next day berating me for being mean and not a team player before realizing i did not give a shit about them and switching tactics to telling management that the union was asking for too much and they should vote down the contract

boss-of-armadildos

#i had to call up our union rep like. hey. i don't know what the fuck to call this. but i feel like i should report it??#and the old-school ring-of-keys butch that was our rep at the time took like ten minutes to process what i was telling her#and when she did she was SO angry. she was like. i have literally never heard of a union member doing this. what the fuck.#this is when i started calling them scabsy when relating stories to internet friends#there are so many stories#their dog is named after a cardinal virtue because their spouse wouldn't let them give their child a puritan name#they do math on a print calculator and enter numbers off the receipt into excel#they once got into a longer checkout line at walmart to avoid a cashier they thought sounded gay (he was southern)#they call the dealership while at work to lease a new ford truck every 18 months#they are a landlord estranged from their liberal parents because they refused to get vaccinated#they are in at least five pyramid schemes that i am aware of

gumy-shark

sometimes my Beloved Mutuals will rb a post about a certain character archetype and i will have to physically restrain myself from saying “yeah you would say that wouldn’t you”

gumy-shark

jasper you don’t get to get away with this that easily.

new ask game: what’s the character archetype that makes you go “of course you would say that” when i post about it?

virtualgirladvance

ace-disgrace-on-the-case

one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"

the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.

aiuzira

mobius strip

sharkfiinn

imnkilling them with my brain

willowberecki

Ok, I've been curious about this for a while:

How do you pronounce HLVRAI?

H-L-V-R-A-I

Hull-vry

Hell-vry

Either of the above 2 but "fry" instead of "vry"

Half-Life V-R-A-I

Other

Remaining time: 1 day 23 hours

#hi-li-veeaarayeye

jessebloom

this almost makes me want to go back to law school

#🖼️🗂️

ivfhnyfubpx

this scene is so fucking funny the english dub of this show is so good

laughconfetti

loud warning

notajerusalemcricketd-deactivat

nunnatheinsanegerbil

teaboot

Rolling on the floor sobbing and crying and losing my mind at “GET INSIDE THE VAAAAAAAAAAN”

its-your-mind

finally. an appropriate name for my ‘time to leave’ alarm.

nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice

Iroh: so Toph, what are your goals in life?

Toph: I’ve been banned from every major city’s transportation system except Omashu

Toph: I don’t know what their limit is but I will fucking find it

probsjosh

King Boomie, having exactly zero limits:

theotheristhedoctor

Unstoppable object meets immovable force

gaangarang

[Toph eventually slips up and is captured by the city guard force. Instead of being imprisoned or exiled, Toph finds herself being given audience with the King of Omashu.]

Bumi: Well, well, well. It seems I have finally met the troublemaker who has been causing such chaos with my rail systems.

Toph:…

Bumi: I must say, I am thoroughly impressed with your earthbending abilities. You remind me of myself when I was a lad.

Toph: Get to the point.

Bumi: I see great potential in you, Toph Beifong. I want you inherit my title once I am no longer fit to rule.

Toph: Wait what the fuck

out-there-on-the-maroon

Why wasn’t this Toph’s future instead of becoming a freaking cop. This would have made so much more sense.

gallusrostromegalus

My favorite part of this is “when I am no longer fit to rule” because

1. Implying Bumi was fit to rule at any point

1.1 except maybe in the sense that he was completely shredded

2. That he has no plans to die, (nor would death necessarily make him unfit to rule), but that he apparently intends to like. Tuck his arms and legs into himself and just roll off into the sunset.

3. Given that the Earth Kingdom has an actual ruling family that causes some drama in LoK, Toph continuing to cause monarchy confusion is both 100% in character and fucking hilarious.

definitelynotaminion

Toph takes over as King Bumi the second and everyone is like “no that’s not how inheriting works” and Bumi is like “No no she’s right, I did say “inherit my title!”

aromantic-angel

When toph is no longer fit to rule, she instills bumi (Aang’s son) as her heir and he is known as bumi 3.

catflowerqueen

Her first act as ruler is to ban herself from Omashu’s transportation system, thus fulfilling one of her life goals.

carolofthebell

But then she ignores her ban and continues to use the transport system forcing her guard to chase her and print wanted posters declaring her a fugitive.

Fortunately the clerks served under King Bumi the First and are well aquatinted with explaining chaos to the confused citizenry of Omashu. Without missing a beat they print the posters in 2 parts.

The first (read this aloud) part is a fairly standard Wanted poster explaining that King Bumi II Toph the Blind Melon Bandit Lord is Banned from the Omashu Transport system for crimes etc….

The second part (do not read this aloud) explains not to be concerned; if you see the King at one of the stations just shout “There she is!” The guards will chase her and you are free to go about your day. The King thanks you for participating in this guard training drill.

neosatsuma

rain-droplet

who turned them german mid tag ?

dastardlywlw

how do you know they were transformed midday?

were--ralph

im not a furry but recently ive been thinking about what if there was a global outbreak of a virus that transforms you into your fursona? so i made one just in case. not because im a furry (im not) but just ouf of safety if i need one in a pinch. he's very cute and fluffy btw

No yeah that makes sense like you always have to be prepared

silly-detector

"im not a furry but recently ive been thinking about what if there was a global outbreak of a virus that transforms you into your fursona? so i made one just in case. not because im a furry (im not) but just ouf of safety if i need one in a pinch. he's very cute and fluffy btw"

No yeah that makes sense like you always have to be prepared

this post contains:

1 clown!

2 mimes!

1 jester!