the banished

[mournfully-yasmin]

I wouldn't put it past her; she's a bitch. I'm all for some graceful chaos, but she's a lotta-bit-much.

I thought I would stop by and check on you after I heard everyone had crossed over to Bellora's side.

[caelxdelacroix]

Understatement on both counts. She makes what happened to the timelines seem like vacation.

I hope you weren't worrying I was joining them. As much as I care for the kid, my dad and Uncle Kai have it handled. And that...probably wasn't the biggest worry on your mind. I'm fine, Yasmin. Fucking pissed as Hell, but fine.

[mournfully-yasmin]

Seems I caught you at a bad time. Who are you trying to call?

[caelxdelacroix]

Just trying to call my dad or uncle...or Marina. I guess, Bellora cell phone-proofed the evil goddess lair.

It's not a bad time, Yas. Never is with you, actually.

[tempestuously-lysander]

Forgive me for staying out of the current issues, but there's not much I can do other than lend an ear.

[caelxdelacroix]

Is lending an ear your chance listening to everyone bitch about their feelings regarding the whole dynamic shift in the house? Yeah, I'll pass.

[gianna-foxwood]

Barely into the lockdown, and I already lost track of someone I'm caring for. Not very First Mother of me.

[caelxdelacroix]

We lost Marina. Well, I should've known it's been too quiet around here. Kidding. Kind of.

Okay, and not only is she gone, but my father's about to be worn like a monster-shaped glove by my brother's evil version of our dad. Why the fuck is that?

[caelxdelacroix]

Does anyone in my family not know how to pick up the fucking phone?

[beau-baird]

You definitely did, and who knows– maybe you'll see a little bit of both coming out sooner or later. I guess it's a good thing you aren't his son. My father isn't a bad dad– he's only done things so far because he doesn't know better and has a massive learning curve, but it had to be nipped in the bud before my sister decided to stab him over the stunts that he's been pulling. Uh, it's way more than a crush– take it from me, who's been a pining simp for most of my life over a goddess, I know it when I see it, but it's weirdly a good thing. It's a choice that's hers. Imagine you wake up and you have a kid that you didn't think you'd ever have, they're adults, and even though they can protect themselves, you didn't see them grow up to get to that point. It doesn't excuse everything he's done, but it makes sense that he would stumble a little. There's a lot of that in the family, the whole kettle calling the pot black.

[caelxdelacroix]

Maybe, but it's a really good thing I'm not his son or I would've taken the many knives he always seems to carry around and jam it through my eye sockets. I know he raised you and your sister in a different timeline, however, Ram obviously now sees he's not the father you grew up with. He probably didn't even meet your mother the same way. We're a step up from a crush and moved to full-blown love phase now? Shit, you're making my day better and better. Honestly, I might know a little about pining myself, if what I'm comprehending is pining. You realize my dad here went through the same thing when Blair and I arrived, right? Don't think he took it to Ram's extremes like beating the shit out of his kid's significant other. The family's stubborn and set in their ways.

[caelxdelacroix]

You could say it's a form of bad luck coincidence as it is a happy accident. I've never personally been to the place one of my fathers grew up in, but I'm so looking forward watching him descend to the deepest pit in Hell and never really bother us again.

Which means you possess the in that I don't, my friend. He obviously doesn't know shit how to function with a proper family so seeing his daughter and the little asshole together short circuits that pea-sized brain of his. He's not very creative in the nickname department when he's riled, truly. I'm not the easiest to assuage, Sterling, and it spells promising with his family. He has siblings, Ariel and Kaniel, they're ally-worthy. There's also my cousin Ulric that he butts heads with. You have your pick of the litter.

[fiendishly-sterling]

Now, to be a little bit of a downer myself, but my life is a constant string of bad luck; it's all about how you spin it, which in this case is very much a happy accident. You should go, I heard Hell is nice this time of year.

You should have seen his face the moment that Beatrice stopped him from trying to kill me– his shocked expression will forever fuel my dreams and be my version of rainbows and butterflies. Now, I've already run into Ariel– she is by far one of my favorite people, and when I told Ram that his siblings sounded better than he ever did, he was close to shitting a brick. Probably jealous since he would never be as cool as they are. Now, to add you and your cousin to the mix? Oh, I'm going to forever carve myself into Ram's shit list and live there happily knowing that I will occupy space in his mind rent-free from merely existing.

[caelxdelacroix]

Believe me, I bring down the energy of any room I walk into according to some people. We'll say it's a happy accident. I could always use a tagalong for my vacation in Hell if you're willing to join.

I swear to goddess, I wish you or some jackass who thinks he's Spielberg could have been recording that shit so I could see the look on his mug. Ariel's got some stories about her fuckass brother and her favorite brother who've been dying to meet so I can compare notes. Please, Ramiel isn't used to being the uncool one of his siblings. He's like those popular jocks who peak in high school and then find out the world doesn't revolve around them when they graduate. Karma's a bitch, Sterling, and he's about to experience that tenfold with our joined forces. Yeah. Maybe the dick tried keeping his distance for my cousin's sake, but he didn't hesitate rubbing his marriage in everyone's faces.

[beau-baird]

Now that's the level of petty that you could have gotten from either of your fathers. I do enjoy being the favorite, but there are certain things a son shouldn't have to do, and one of them is humiliate his father. Regardless of whether it was deserved or not. However, my scolding will be far better than whatever Bea would have up her sleeves if our dad went any further. Went after Sterling and tried to kill him, all in the name of protecting his daughter.

[caelxdelacroix]

I like to believe I inherited equal parts dream witch and Prince pettiness, it just doesn't come out very often. This could make me a really bad son, but if I had a father like Ramiel which I'd rather stick a thousand needles in my eyes, I would have no problem humiliating my dads. Oh, Bea harbors a little crush, you're making my day so much better. Your dad really is a fucking idiot, isn't he? Your sister's a grown assassin and he literally decided to look through the 'she's a reckless in love teenager' lens. Kettle calling the pot black, I know.

[beau-baird]

I'm very aware of how much he loves talking about people that irritate him; that's a shared trait between this Ramiel and mine, but not wanting to kill him sounds a lot like good terms to me. While I love the enthusiasm, perhaps you shouldn't be in the room with me, Uncle Cael. I don't need to humiliate my father any more than I no doubt will with what I have to say to him, but how close you are to the door to hear is up to you.

[caelxdelacroix]

Personally, I like knowing I occupy a little space in his mind and remind him that he's not getting rid of me. This is why you're my favorite nephew. You see, why worry about humiliating your father when it's exactly what he deserved? Small dose of his own medicine and for me to have a chance kicking his ass off of that high horse of his? Let me guess, though, Beatrice asked you to scold him after he, what, went after Sterling? That's Ramiel coded.

[beau-baird]

Ah, you've met Sterling, then– should have known that you would get along with him given your history with my father. Well, buckle up for more good news in your eyes– I'm about to go scold my father at my sister's request.

[caelxdelacroix]

Convenient your dad's a damn blabbermouth and isn't quiet about his vendettas. I don't want to kill him anymore, that's what I consider good terms. Ah, shit, you're about to lay the fuck into him, aren't you? Can I be there? Me being in the room might make your reprimanding worse, I'll take eavesdropping on the opposite side of the door.

[beau-baird]

Now there's a smile I haven't seen since I came to this timeline. Gotta say, I missed seeing it.

[caelxdelacroix]

Well, I had nothing to smile about since I showed up here, but thanks to a certain big bad vampire's kid and his new standing rivalry with your pops, I'm peachy.

[fiendishly-sterling]

Hilarious because I wasn't doing it to spite him in the first place. I didn't even know that he and Beatrice were related until he came after me. Unfortunately, that will probably be a cold day in Hell before Ramiel kicks the bucket.

Then we can call me being around his daughter as specially crafted payback. I was at least hoping for a better nickname than 'the little asshole'. I've heard of that one so many times that it's starting to get unoriginal at this point. Now, I can use that– it would probably be highly annoying to him if I happened to get chummy with his family, and while I have the capability to irritate, I'm also quite good at getting on people's good sides.

[caelxdelacroix]

You could say it's a form of bad luck coincidence as it is a happy accident. I've never personally been to the place one of my fathers grew up in, but I'm so looking forward watching him descend to the deepest pit in Hell and never really bother us again.

Which means you possess the in that I don't, my friend. He obviously doesn't know shit how to function with a proper family so seeing his daughter and the little asshole together short circuits that pea-sized brain of his. He's not very creative in the nickname department when he's riled, truly. I'm not the easiest to assuage, Sterling, and it spells promising with his family. He has siblings, Ariel and Kaniel, they're ally-worthy. There's also my cousin Ulric that he butts heads with. You have your pick of the litter.

[fiendishly-sterling]

He's such an idiot, and I'm over here literally not even thinking about him. I don't blame you for escaping Ramsie's non-stop motor-mouth– seriously, he doesn't have an off switch.

Well, shit. You gave me so much ammunition, and I absolutely can't wait to use it on him. Honestly, what a fucking hypocrite. I will gladly make his life harder, Cael. I'm Sterling, since ol' Rammy boy probably never actually used my name. We're officially allies.

[caelxdelacroix]

You know, he could sleep a wink without seeing your face if you weren't screwing his daughter. Tell me about it, the only off switch he will ever have is when somebody flips it to dead.

Feel free to use my best material if I'm ever unavailable to spread the irritation. He spent a small portion of his free time when he wasn't avoiding me like a pussy trying to get under my skin just because he shacked up with Blair. Fucker just referred to you as 'the little asshole' which definitely wasn't an insult at all. Two heads are better than one, Sterling. I know Rammy boy intimately, what he likes and especially what he hates. That usually boiled down to anyone insulting my cousin and the subject of his family. His siblings and mother are a soft spot we could use.

[fiendishly-sterling]

I'm touched that Rammy boy talks about me in his home life.

I don't know you well enough to be allies, but the fact that you like it when I irritate the windbag says a lot. What'd he do to you?

[caelxdelacroix]

He hasn't shut up since the party and I'm suffering in a house with him under lock and key. Hence why I ventured out.

Fair. Ram worked for the King who killed my cousin's parents and then kidnapped said cousin before wiping our memories once the fucker panicked. He found us, somehow convinced Blair to marry him, and now I'm stuck with his ass as my brother-in-law basically. We came to a miniscule understanding, but now I'm looking to make his life harder. I'm Cael.

[caelxdelacroix]

Today is going to be a great day. It's already looking up.

[fiendishly-sterling]

I always love watching people scramble around while I drink my coffee.

[caelxdelacroix]

You are all the craze in my household, anyone getting under Ramiel's skin is a friend of mine.

Allies?

[azriel-delacroix]

I guess that's another thing that makes your dad and me the same, though this isn't a great distraction at the moment.

Well, I'm open to suggestions.

[caelxdelacroix]

I'm not trying to compare the two of you, Dad. My version of you and Lust are long dead at this point and I've accepted we're probably never going back. If we're being honest, you've been here for me more than the father I grew up with. It wasn't his fault, really, just spent a lot of his time keeping Lust in one piece.

Then we'll meditate. Sit.