Someone once told me that you are who your surround yourself with. I never really understood the importance behind it until recently. Sophomore year is coming to an end, and with it certain relationships are as well. I’m not here to point fingers or blame people, because really it’s no one’s fault. Instead, I’d like to take the time to reflect on what I’ve learned and gained from these individuals.
1) You can’t expect someone to be able to return what you give. You know that saying that goes something like “give and do not expect anything in return”? Yeah well it’s bullshit. No really. The relationships you form with others should be relationships that force you to grow and become better. There’s only so much you can give someone until it starts to take a toll on your own well-being. When this starts to happen, you have to learn how to walk away. Relationships wont always be a 50/50 give and take, but the people in your life should try to always meet you halfway.
2) You do not owe anyone anything. Something I’ve had to learn is that I need to invest in myself first. I tend to put so much of myself in other people, because I genuinely care about those in my life. Sometimes, I find myself letting their pain or toxicity enter my life, which just means I’m probably really empathetic. However, I’ve learned that I need to take care of myself before I can really let someone in.
3) Get to know the people you surround yourself with. They probably seem really great and understanding at first. But then they start to slip up, which is fine! No one is perfect. However, do not make excuses for their flaws. They are who they are, and you can’t change that.
4) People don’t suck, just certain relationships do. Who knows, you two are probably really great people on your own. But if you’re not when you’re together, why are you trying to force it? And who knows, maybe down the line when the both of you have grown and changed as humans, it could work out. Just know that both of you have learned from one another. Whether it’s about yourself, or the kind of people you’d like to have in your life.
5) How others feel about you should not influence how you view yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else does. Therefore, value your own views and morals. Know your self-worth and don’t let anyone ever make you question it.
I think that’s about all for now. I can’t wait to see what the next few months have to offer, since I’ll be staying in Madison for the summer and doing some traveling.
Remember, every failure or mistake along with your successes has made you who you are today. Love yourself and love one another.
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