Hiiiiiii

[goomorni]

the waitress gay as hell i would've gone crazy

[treybien]

I've been saying this

[boobasprite]

stollen from forgotten... sorry

[throbbinggristle]

Czechoslovakian matchboxes

[platinumrest]

Alet Pilon

[cherryjams]

‘Hands weaving magnetic-core memory, IBM, Poughkeepsie, New York,’ 1956. Photograph by Ansel Adams.

[capricornstellium]

I should lowkey stop being a loser

[capricornstellium]

Kept seeing dead birds everywhere this month and wondered what that could’ve meant. actually it was just a dead pigeon one day and two baby doves the other, but it’s still recurring enough that it made me think about it. maybe i’d see more dead birds everywhere if i left the house more often. there have even been a family of birds making a nest in my house. I keep feeling like it’s a metaphor for something.

everything came to a bang recently with matheus, i feel like. i have felt unwanted and unloved for a while now. every time he comes to visit i feel drained and it’s impossible he doesn’t feel it too. A year ago he came to visit for his cousin’s wedding and we hung out but he barely spoke to me and brought other friends to our dinner which i thought was weird and uncalled for. I do not like those people and they don’t seem to care for me that much either, which is fine. but don’t show up with them unannounced. it happened again the day after and it just genuinely made me sick to my stomach lol i had to excuse myself and leave early because he couldn’t even pretend to give a fuck about me. gio has been brewing this resentment against him which has made sad and uncomfortable even though i think it’s warranted. she gets angry while i just get sad and blame it on myself. but i really don’t think i’m being that unreasonable

every time he visits we see each other less. and today we hung out without him while he’s in town. which i guess must have hurt his feelings and i feel bad for it. but we barely talk. i feel like we’re holding onto something just for the sake of it, because it’s routine. he visits and we see him. but i never feel like he really wants to hang out. he always complains about everything. Uber fares, the traffic, the loudness. like i get it, you don’t like it here but don’t make this a bad time for everybody.

this is a dilemma i keep facing. do we work through this or just let the friendship go? i would like for us to work trough it. but i feel like everyone’s hurt and being childish about it. i haven’t talked to him yet but i do plan on it. Woman who is 27 forgets how cathartic writing about your own problems is. LIKE DUHHHHHHH

[plumslices]

[cocainejuul]

Frontiers of Dreams and Fears, 2001

[cocainejuul]

Some more “what’s in my bag” posts from flickr. We have always been the same…..

[distantvoices]

By Isamaya Ffrench

[belletower]

[cocainejuul]

Anne Hathaway, 2003

[horrorshow]

SUPERNATURAL 9.23 Do You Believe in Miracles

[prettyfuul]

Cillian Murphy and Josh Hartnett doing performance art on the Miu Miu fall 1999 Mens runway

[s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s]

JAVELIN is out today. Thank you for listening. I love you.

This album is dedicated to the light of my life, my beloved partner and best friend Evans Richardson, who passed away in April. He was an absolute gem of a person, full of life, love, laughter, curiosity, integrity, and joy. He was one of those rare and beautiful ones you find only once in a lifetime—precious, impeccable, and absolutely exceptional in every way.

I know relationships can be very difficult sometimes, but it’s always worth it to put in the hard work and care for the ones you love, especially the beautiful ones, who are few and far between. If you happen to find that kind of love, hold it close, hold it tight, savor it, tend to it, and give it everything you’ve got, especially in times of trouble. Be kind, be strong, be patient, be forgiving, be vigorous, be wise, and be yourself. Live every day as if it is your last, with fullness and grace, with reverence and love, with gratitude and joy. This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Thank you. I love you.  XOS

Sufjan Stevens - Javelin

Listen to Javelin by Sufjan Stevens.

[xoxomyah]