Feminism is seen, by most men, as some awful thing that women have created as a passageway to share theirĀ āhatredā for men with an excuse. However, feminism is the equality of the sexes. Equal rights for all men and women, equal treatment of all men and women. I know far too many men who think feminism is unnecessary and that women have all of their rights, and what could we possibly be fighting for? I want to explain to men why that is wrong and what feminism is truly about.Ā
When I was about five years old or so, I was playing in my front yard with my brothers and our male neighbor, who was about sixteen at the time. I remember my mom calling me into the house and sitting me down, with a very serious and almost scared look on her face. She told me that if a man ever touched my private areas, to kick him in his and run to her as fast as I could. I was five years old when I had to be taught that, and with the way the world is, I will probably have to tell my daughter that as well. Do you see whatās wrong in this scenario? Yes, children should always be warned of the dangers that are around them and taught how to handle them properly and safely. But I wish I didnāt have to live in a world where I have to teach my elementary school aged daughter about sexual assault. I wish I didnāt have to tell her that men are capable of hurting her in such a way. I wish my mother didnāt have to look outside to see me playing with an older boy and feel scared that he might do something to me. Boys donāt have to be warned about this at age five the way girls do. Boys are brought up in a society that sees women as objects and as less than them. They grow up to believe that ideology and practice it.Ā Ā
Girls are also taught at a young age, whether it be told to them directly or something that is just made known to them in a more indirect way, that they are weaker than men, they are smaller than men. These girls grow into women, still believing that men are above them and watch men get opportunities that they, as a woman, deserved, but didnāt get because they are female.Ā
It took me until college to realize that I am strong, I am powerful and that I deserve respect. It had been so drilled in my head by society that none of that was true and that men were to hold higher positions, aspire to more, etc. I realized thatās bullshit. Although I am a woman, I am just as capable, smart and strong. I was born into a world where, because of that, I have to work harder. I have to prove myself where men do not have to. But I was never told as a little girl that I can be as successful as a man, or that I can be more successful than a man. Itās how we are raised- believing subconsciously that we are less than. Our lives are laid out for us to fail and have difficulty succeeding. We are expected to aspire to marriage and starting a family. When I say this specifically to some of my male friends, they laugh. They say,Ā āMost women these days do work and arenāt just stay at home momās.ā This is true. But do you realize what these women had to go through to have the career that they do? For example, I was recently thinking about moving further away from New York City, to a state where my boyfriend would be more comfortable, more in his element. But NYC is where my career and my art would thrive. I talked to multiple people in my family, a few friends, etc. and asked them what I should do. They told me to not worry about my career, but instead worry about making my boyfriend happy so that we can raise a happy family. Countless women share a similar story. Being told that their career will get in the way of starting a family, leaving the jobs and opportunities to men. Men are taught to work hard and be successful, whereas women are taught to please men and put whatever they need to aside in order to have a family. That is so incredibly wrong. Yet this is happening, all day, everyday to women across the globe. For women of color and trans women, it is only harder. Men like to dismiss all of this and believe that everything is fine. Iām not sure if its ignorance or fear of women no longer being subordinate, but it needs to end. Men need to recognize the inequalities and the differences in raising girls vs boys to see the root of these issues so that they can make changes as well. Raise your children differently.Ā
Feminism is not a word that describes angry girls, it is a word that fights for equality of the sexes. Whether you are a man, woman, fluid, trans, gender non-conforming, gender neutral, etc. You should be a feminist.Ā
blakekathryn
jacobvanloon
pixelskylines
