KNIGHT OF BLOOD.

CARCINOGENETICIST EPSILON. CITIZEN.

[heartsrogue-blog]

All this talk of butts and not a single choice Vantass in sight.

[carcinologist]

[carcinologist]

FILL MY CUP, PUT SOME TRICKSTER IN IT.

You don’t care much for the INSANE AMOUNT OF BLOODSHED that paints the city almost exclusively red -- something you find either oddly delightful or delightfully odd. Nor do you particularly care for the SCREAMS OF THE SOON-TO-BE DEAD, which you supposed you CAN’T REALLY COMPLAIN ABOUT, since you know a guy who puts up with this (or used to put up with it) on a daily basis. In short, this “war” is nothing more than a COMPLETE AND UTTER WASTE OF TIME, and you’ve decided you’re having none of it.

What you are having is a JOLLY GOOD TIME. You’ve already run into your BEST AND GREATEST PAL IN THE WHOLE WORLD, and -- speak of the devil! Hardly a block away, you swear you catch a glimpse of you BEST AND GREATEST BRO IN THE WHOLE WORLD. The guy has blond hair and stupid shades, anyway, and that can only mean ONE THING.

“STRIIIIIIIIIIIDER! WHAT THE ASS BLISTERING FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO WITHOUT ME? WITHOUT ANYONE? YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER.” You make a valiant attempt to sling an arm around the poor bastard’s shoulder. “YOU SHOULD BE USING THE BUDDY SYSTEM LIKE THE REST OF US!”

unabscondable 

[bliindary]

What hiigh are you ON. (Closed)

carcinologist

[You knew it. you fucking knew it. You even told the guy next to you, that you knew it. This is fucking bullshit. Only one world comes out alive or some shit? What kind of doom did you even bring? It had to be your fault anyways, but you aren’t going to think of the obvious fact. It’s a shame that the two worlds couldn’t just live together in a way. That would be nice. Which is why you really aren’t engaging in any fights with the other world. It was just nice having two worlds. It was doom for one, but a sense of peace in the present time.]

[So fuck everyone else and enjoy this.]

[You already came across your other self. Which is not that different from you. Except seem a little nicer and… well, you didn’t mind that you.You both knew what the fuck this all was, and just decided to do nothing about it. Good plan. Now what kind of alternate trolls were in this city. You really were curious to find out about that. Because who wouldn’t want to point and laugh at this situation. of how ridiculous all this was. You sure want to take that time before doom came over.]

[And speak of the devil. There is one that you know! Well, the alternate of himself… actually… is this even consider normal alternate?]

SOLLUX: KK?

[You stare him down for a moment. There was… everything wrong with this guy, but no doubt he is the Karkat you know. Based on appearance. Actually, not even that, just the shape of this guy was Karkat. That sounds better. The last thing you need to do is compare the Karkat you know to some happy-go-lucky fucker.]

SOLLUX: oh my god.  SOLLUX: ii2 thii2 2ome alternate ver2iion of you actually takiing 2ome mother fuckiing miiriicle2 or 2ome 2hiit? becau2e that’2 depre22iing 2iite you have now ii2 goiing two get me 2iick.

[carcinologist]

In his eyes, this Hive City is the “otherworld.” He’s lived in this place for... what? A few months now? No, it’s only been a month. Or a sweep? Maybe a few sweeps... but does it really matter in the end? He’s here, and his friends are here, too. As long as they’re together nothing else matters at all! ...Right?

How serendipitous that he should happen across one of his best ol’ buddies ol’ pals right there and then, as sickeningly sugary thoughts of that human emotion called friendship run rampant through his addled mind.

“SOLLUX!!!!!!!!!!!” The sheer volume of his screech could shatter glass. “WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN? I’VE BEEN LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR YOU! IT’S A GODDAMN MIRACLE THAT I FINALLY FOUND YOU, BUT MAN. DUDE. YOU TOTALLY HAVE TO HEAR ME OUT, OKAY? THIS. IS. AWESOME.”

[carcinologist]

for the duration of the event, all non-event threads will be put on hold! i may reply to a couple here and there, but i make no promises. i’m planning to go through my thread tracker when the event ends to drop stale threads or those that haven’t been replied to since long before the event.

as far as the event goes, i believe i owe sollux a reply and bro a starter! if i owe anyone else or if anyone else would like to do something with karkat or tricksterkat for the event, please let me know!!

[unabscondable]

Oh boy howdy, we had a live one here. Wait, you had heard that most trolls died somehow so maybe…you had a dead one? Was that even more insensitive? Naaaaaaah. You could only grin at that tone in his voice. This was great. Fan fucking tastic. 

     >>oh come on

     >>i know you trolls

     >>unless you can understand

     >>sarcasm youd know

     >>this was all one big

     >>joke god damn just chill

With a shrug, you’d fold your arms across your chest, grin never once leaving your face. 

     >>that aside im

     >>just glad to

     >>see someone who has

     >>a proverbial spine to talk

     >>back with

[carcinologist]

“‘A’ SPINE? MOTHERFUCKER PLEASE. IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU’VE MET A FEW TROLLS SO LET ME CLARIFY ONE THING BEFORE WE DRAG THIS ROOT CANAL OF A CONVERSATION OUT LIKE MILES OF INTESTINES BEHIND A FRESH KILL. I AM THE GODDAMN *LEADER* OF AT LEAST HALF OF THOSE SNIVELING IMBECILES, WHICH MEANS I AM FIERCER AND MORE CAPABLE THAN ANY FUCKING ONE OF THEM. LET’S JUST PUT THAT ON THE TABLE WHERE WE CAN BOTH SEE IT SO YOU CAN DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT IT’S REALLY WORTH PISSING ME OFF.”

[carcinologist]

「 ♋ 」 carcinoGeneticist

The alpha Karkat (or the Karkat who assumes he is the alpha) isn’t quite sure what to do in this predicament. Ideally, he’d like to talk to some alternate versions of his friends or teammates before making a decision. For all he knows, this is how things must go in order to create a semi-coherent timeline and eventually land in a safe world -- even if it means he isn’t the alpha Karkat after all. While he isn’t about to lead an attack into the otherworld yet, he will defend himself and this world in the case of an outright assault.

「 ♋ 」 candiedGrievances

In an alternate timeline that bore no survivors, Karkat has fallen prey to... well... no one is entirely sure how this trickster nonsense began, but lo and behold, the fair leader has succumbed to the sugary goodness of Trickster Mode. As a trickster, Karkat is able to warp certain aspects of reality and has the potential to engage others in Trickster Mode as well -- but perhaps the most frightening thing about him is his unrelenting, maniacal happiness.

[unabscondable]

carcinologist

[unabscondable]

Okay, so you’ve met a troll or three and you don’t mind them at all. Kind of colorful, actually. They, well…amuse you to no end with how they act. Especially when you can get a rise out of a certain juggalo-esqe one who is a real riot. 

No, literally, he’s a one person riot. 

What a hoot. 

You may as well test this one out, see how he reacts. So, you stop in front of him, bending down a bit to look at the other’s face. So all trolls had this skin color, huh? That was kind of interesting, but you couldn’t find anything to say about that. 

You mean, talking about things like that? Shit, boy, you ain’t gonna go there. And yet you manage to do, somehow. Oh the irony. 

     >>i thought i saw another troll

     >>digging the greyscale look though 

     >>suits you

     >>not that im saying you blend into the background or anything but

     >>hell i kind of am and you kind of do

[carcinologist]

Would you look at that: another ignorant human commenting on your not at all unusual appearance, as if his looks any more natural from your perspective. -- Wait, why are these things being said in the narration when you can say them aloud?

“WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT: ANOTHER IGNORANT HUMAN WHO HAS SOMEONE DELUDED HIMSELF INTO BELIEVING HE HAS THE WHEREWITHAL TO COMMENT ON MY COMPLETELY NATURAL APPEARANCE. HAS IT EVER OCCURRED TO YOU THAT ALL OF YOU LOOK JUST AS WEIRD TO US AS WE DO TO YOU, IF NOT SOMEHOW WEIRDER?”

[amxngstars-blog]

+ carcinologist 

[amxngstars-blog]

      【★】”You. I need ya’ to tell me all yer secrets. Yer alien secrets. ‘m interactin’ with too many of yer kind, I need this. I need to know all.” He’s desperate. Even enough so to grab the other’s shoulders and give him a shake.

[carcinologist]

“FROM OUR PERSPECTIVE, YOU SOFT, HORNLESS CREATURES ARE THE ALIENS, BUT ALRIGHT, WHATEVER. YOU WANNA KNOW A SECRET? HERE’S ONE: DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME, YOU GODDAMN MANIAC. IF I WAS HALF THE VIOLENT SOCIOPATH MOST TROLLS ARE, I COULD’VE KILLED YOU WITHOUT REMORSE JUST FOR LOOKING ME IN THE EYE. SO HOW ABOUT YOU TURN THE FUCK DOWN, GRABBY MCSTRANGERTOUCHER.”

[carcinologist]

“OH, FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK.”

[nojaillikesuperjail]

“Wow, that sure was a lot of long words! It’s obvious now you don’t like small talk. Good thing I tuned you out somewhere in the middle of it, because, frankly, I didn’t care~.”

“Hey, now that I think about it, you look kind of familiar… You are one of those - how are they called? Ah, right, trolls! You are one of them, right?” 

[carcinologist]

“GEE, WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT! THE BABBLING SUPERGENIUS KNOWS A THING OR TWO ABOUT TROLLS. I’D BE IMPRESSED IF IT WASN’T BLATANTLY OBVIOUS. WHAT GAVE IT AWAY? THE SKIN? THE HORNS? OR THE OVERWHELMING AURA I GIVE OFF OF BEING ABSOLUTELY SUPERIOR TO YOU IN EVERY WAY FOREVER?”

[carcinologist]

If that guy comes within ten feet of any of the beta trolls (except Equius, maybe)...

[tipsygnostxlgic]

        “Lmao, kay. Can I call you hot? Is hot okay to call you? Does that one not hurt your adorable manly ego? Wait, scratch the adorable (even if it is totties still adorable) and call it your flourishing manly ego since, what, you’re a teen, right? I don’t know what trolls grow up into other than evil batter soaked juggalo fucked empire runnin’ bitches, so ‘manly ego’ is hells kindsa sittin’ there in the open waitin’ to be proved or disproved like a puberty based science experiment.”

        “Oh, but you can rest your anger filled head about murdering. I’m not gonna murder anyone unless it’s…I dunno, maybe the batterwitch. I’d murder her for a whole fuckton of reasons, if I even could that is. But I think maybe literally anyone would too, if they were alive for revenge that is. Does that count?”

        “Also, you know my mom? Is she here? Well… I mean, my real, real mom is here but I mean, like little teen mom. Do you know if…she’s alive?”

[carcinologist]

“FUCK THAT ENTIRE SENTIMENT RIGHT UP ITS UNDULATING ASSHOLE. OKAY, SO A COUPLE OF US HAVE APPARENTLY DEPARTED THE SANITY TRAIN AT CRAZY JUGGALO ASSFUCK JUNCTION, BUT THEY ARE THE SPONGE-ROTTED MINORITY. IF YOU SO MUCH AS BREATHE THAT MIND-FUCKINGLY FALSE SENTIMENT EVER AGAIN, I WILL HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO FLIP MY FUCKING SHIT. DO YOU WANT THAT, I ASK? PSYCH, IT’S A RHETORICAL QUESTION. YOU ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY DO NOT.”

“LOOK, YOU MAY BE A GOD TIER, BUT YOU HAVE ALL BUT DISAPPEARED DUE TO HOW FAR OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE YOU ARE.  BESIDES. THE CONDESCE IS PRETTY MUCH THE LEAST OF OUR GRAND OLD WORRIES RIGHT NOW. OR HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT JACK AND LORD ENGLISH? I CAN’T IMAGINE WHAT A CAREFREE LIFE I COULD BE LIVING IF NOT FOR THE CONSTANT THREAT OF EXISTENTIAL DOOM LOOMING OVER MY HEAD THANKS TO THOSE TWO JACKWAGONS.

ROSE? I SPENT THE LAST THREE HUMAN YEARS STUCK ON SOME DANK-ASS METEOR WITH HER AND SUDDENLY SHE’S NOWHERE TO BE SEEN. I RAN INTO POST-SCRATCH WHATEVER-THE-FUCK ROSE, WHO IS IRRELEVANT BEYOND BELIEF, BUT ALPHA ROSE? I HAVEN’T SEEN HER, AND TO BE FRANK, I’M A LITTLE WORRIED. BUT YOU DIDN’T HEAR ME SAY THAT.”

[headphonehitokiri]

“I’ve no idea what I have done wrong, but I am sorry you would be so upset by it. If you ask as much, I can correct my behaviour – your threat is not particularly persuasive. Perhaps it would be more so if I were fully convinced you can reach my face.”

[carcinologist]

“DO YOU HEAR THAT? THE STILT-LEGGED TREE MONSTER IS MAKING A SHORT JOKE. HOW FUCKING CLEVER! SERIOUSLY, DO YOU WRITE THIS SHIT YOURSELF? IT’S COMEDY GOLD. YOU INGENIOUS BASTARD.

(ROLLING MY GODDAMN EYES.)”

[rhysinpieces-blog1]

No home to go back to? “Wow… no wonder you’ve got such a stick up your ass.” Back to trying to get these ancient fossils working, then. In all honesty, it’s really easy for him to tune out this guy the way he might ignore the extremely long-winded Vasquez.

[carcinologist]

“WHATEVER. THAT PLACE WAS A SHITHOLE, IT’S NOT WORTH MOURNING. PRETTY MUCH THE ONLY DOWNSIDE TO THAT ENTIRE UNIVERSE BEING DESTROYED IS THE CLUSTERFUCK THAT FOLLOWED. I LIVED ON A GODDAMN METEOR WITH A RANDOM ASSORTMENT OF MORONS AND ONE CORPSE-FUCKING JUGGALO ON IDIOT DRUGS FOR A SWEEP AND A HALF. COMPARED TO THAT, ALTERNIA WAS PRACTICALLY SHANGRI-FUCKING-LA.”

[headphonehitokiri]

Charming. Really, this response only seems to confirm what he was trying to say. “I had no intention of making it my business; I was only trying to help. You may keep your ass flakes to yourself however, did you not want them in the first place?”

[carcinologist]

“YOU MAY KEEP YOUR BUSYBODY SNIFFNODE TO YOUR FUCKING SELF BEFORE I REMOVE IT FROM YOUR BODY ENTIRELY. WHO KNOWS, IT MAY IMPROVE THE LOOK OF THAT HIDEOUS THING YOU’RE TRYING TO PASS OFF AS A FACE.”

[shesagam8lignant-blog]

carcinologist

“Has this city 8een scheduled for requisition already?”  It was hard not to think so when so many trolls abound.

“W8, your face…  It reminds me of someone.”  A pause and then a snap of the fingers.

“The one that spearheaded the sectarian revolt.  You are nearly the spitting image.”  She whispered for fear of being caught speaking of the event.

“Pray tell, are there any su8jugl8ors about?  I’m not in the mood for 8eing hung.  I’m still getting into the swing of things here, after all.”

[carcinologist]

“OH, FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK. DEALING WITH ONE SERKET WAS BAD ENOUGH. TWO WAS A NIGHTMARE. BUT THREE??? YOU ARE THE THIRD, RIGHT? SPINNERET MINDFUCK OR WHATEVER? THAT OBNOXIOUS SYMBOL KINDA GIVES YOU AWAY SO I DON’T KNOW WHY I’M EVEN ASKING.”

“DON’T. DON’T EVEN MENTION THAT ROCKHEADED DUNDERFUCK. I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM OR ANY ITERATION OF HIM. NOT NOW, NOT EVER. OR ANY OF THE SUBJUGGLATORS FOR THAT MATTER. AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE CLOWNWANKERS IS SKULKING ABOUT IN THE DEEP SHADOWS OF OUR IGNORANCE BUT I DON’T KNOW IF THERE ARE OTHERS. WHO KNOWS. MAYBE THEY’RE ON THEIR WAY HERE RIGHT NOW TO REMIND YOU THAT, NEWSFLASH! YOU’RE A FUCKING HIGHBLOOD, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU HAVE TO FEAR.”

[rhysinpieces-blog1]

“Gah…” Rhys can work with this. Barely. But he can do it if he must. “Hope no one’s using this one.” He plops himself down and starts typing. They’re really not supposed to be chit-chatting in a library, but the quiet reminds him too much of his cubicle. “So… What are you gonna do when you get back home?”

[carcinologist]

Karkat barely manages to stifle a laugh at that. “HOME? THAT’S HILARIOUS. THERE’S NO WAY IN ANY ITERATION OF ANY PARADOX UNIVERSE THAT I COULD EVER MAKE IT ‘HOME,’ AND IF THERE WAS, I’M NOT SURE I’D WANT TO.” The idea of returning to a planet where he should never have lived long, where he should have died the instant someone caught a glimpse of something as innocent as a scrape or a tear... it doesn’t appeal to him in the slightest.

“I REALIZE THIS IS THE PART WHERE I’M SUPPOSED TO ASK YOU THE SAME THING BACK BUT I DO NOT GIVE A FLYING SHIT ABOUT THE ANSWER.  THAT SHIT COULD BE DOING CARTWHEELS AND BACKFLIPS INTO A POOL OF HIGH FRUCTOSE FART SYRUP AND I STILL WOULD NOT GIVE IT.”