“Why do people care so much which fictional characters kiss each other?”
Sometimes, I will go into the generic “shipping” tag and run across a statement like the above.
I realized I’ve never seen a straightforward list of reasons for why people have favorite ships. I mean, if you really consider every fan’s personal story, there are as many reasons as there are shippers. But I bet there are also some themes that appear repeatedly.
So here are ALL the reasons I can think of, or that I’ve seen other people state, for shipping. These are the reasons why people care. Originally I was gonna differentiate the ones that apply to me, but I think it would be more interesting to just leave that info out (so keep in mind that this list is supposed to be complete and varied, but it doesn’t all apply to me - or anyone else).
It’s often said that shipping is just for “horny nerds” and that it “fetishizes” fiction, but if you look over the list below, I think you’ll find out that sex is merely one category, peripheral at best for many shippers and entirely avoided by some.
Of course, many reasons tie together. I’ll try to categorize as best I can. Note that because shipping is so dominated by romantic pairings, most of these do imply romance, but I did my best to phrase most of the categories (except “sexual appeal”) so that they could apply to non-romantic fictional relationships, too.
Why People Ship Fictional Characters
Aesthetic Reasons:
I think these characters look beautiful/cute/sexy/interesting together.
These characters have designs that complement each other.
These characters have designs that match.
The members of this pairing have recurring motifs (for example: music motifs for a musician, themed colors, specific perfume scents, make each other certain foods, etc) that are really appealing to me.
These characters sing a song together/have a theme song/feature in music together or remind me very much of music I like.
Characterization:
These characters develop each other and/or make each other more interesting.
I think my pairing is good for each other - they’ll help each other reach their full potential, and comfort and support one another.
The characters are totally unique and irreplaceable to each other.
I like the roles the characters play relative to each other - for example, guardians, nemeses, pursuers.
If it weren’t for Character A, I would never have realized how great Character B is.
Emotional Reasons:
I love both characters individually, so I want to see them together.
One of the characters in the pairing is a favorite of mine, and I think they have feelings for the other character, so I want my favorite to get what they want and be happy.
I identify strongly with one or both characters and think they would make each other happy - therefore, I want them to be together.
The relationship between these characters is comforting to me.
The relationship between these characters is painful, but it’s cathartic and/or I love pain.
This pairing helps me experience and work through a series of strong feelings (love, sadness, anxiety, regret) in a fictional context where it’s safe and I don’t have to worry about real people or about my real life.
I’m pretty much in love with one or both of the characters and putting them together is the next best thing to having them to myself!
The patterns, themes, and trajectory of the relationship between these characters is incredibly compelling and inspiring.
There’s another pairing that I hate for some reason, either in the fandom or in canon, so I started to ship my pairing of choice to contradict the one I don’t like.
Intellectual Exploration:
My favorite pairings fascinate me intellectually because of how they parallel or contradict other pairings/phenomena in media.
My pairing of choice has a complex storyline and interactions that are fun to analyze.
This pairing offers unique opportunities for commentary within social/psychological science.
The relationship between these characters is controversial and offers many opportunities to debate and test my opinions and reasoning skills.
There are mysterious things about this pairing/these characters that canon has not clarified, and I enjoy trying to figure it out.
Life Story Reasons:
This pairing reminds me of my own life and its events, and thinking about them helps me process and work through things that have happened in my life.
Because there is something similar between my experiences and what these characters are going through/would go through, putting them together and telling stories about them helps me reconstruct and reframe the way I see my own life story.
Because these characters and their stories somehow remind me of myself, putting them together and telling stories about them helps me rewrite my own life story.
My engagement with this pairing helped me “find myself,” learn more about myself, organize my own thoughts, or discover something else important about my life.
Sexual Appeal:
This pairing appeals to a kink or fantasy of mine.
My favorite pairings tend to be forbidden, and forbidden things are more sexually arousing.
I am sexually attracted to the characters myself and want to see them engage in sex as well.
The pairing helps me explore sexual ideas that I’m curious about, but not sure I’m comfortable with in real life.
I would never approve of my pairing if it happened between real people, but exploring something I know is “wrong” in fiction is sexually exciting.
I think these characters would have exactly the kinds of sex that appeal to me most (e.g. hatesex, passionate lust, sweet lovemaking).
Social Reasons:
My friends love this pairing, so I ship it as another way to socialize with them.
Shipping my pairings of choice helps me meet new people as we all engage in creating fanworks together.
Storytelling Reasons:
This pairing’s relationship is really important to the plot in canon. It spurs some of the most important story developments.
The neatness and coherency of the canon plotline is, or would be, greatly enhanced by the romantic (or close platonic, or queerplatonic) involvement of this pairing.
Themes, Symbolism, and Values
These characters and their relationship masterfully embody important themes and symbols throughout their canon.
These characters and their relationship embody or symbolize my own favorite themes and/or values in life (harmony, the circle of life, redemption, etc).
I believe the world needs more portrayals of relationships like the one I see (or imagine) in my favorite pairing, because it is a portrayal of a healthy relationship.
My favorite pairing is a cautionary tale that everyone should understand.
There is a spiritual dimension to my feelings about these characters. They transcend fiction because of what they represent to me.
I have been told that I am not supposed to ship these characters, and I think it is wrong to tell others what to do, so now I ship them more.
I believe the world needs more portrayals of relationships like the one I see (or imagine) in my favorite pairing, because it involves populations of race/culture/gender/sexual orientation/disability/etc that are severely underrepresented in most media.
I feel represented by my favorite pairing in a way that a lot of media hasn’t satisfied.
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Don’t let me put words in your mouth, though - if I left anything out, please feel free to reblog and add your own thoughts!














